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blubird_pie May 17 2010, 01:21:39 UTC
Aw, Adam. IA that Dean would take what happened to him really hard, and I like your take on how he'd deal with it. And your coda actually has a smile at the end! That's nice :)

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slayerkate May 17 2010, 03:22:59 UTC
Thanks. I wanted to write something where there was acknowledgement of both of Dean's brothers, without doing a reversal of what I've seen already, where Adam isn't acknowledged at all. In a lot of ways, I can see Dean being more... I don't want to say comfortable, but more accepting of Sam's death. The two of them have been hunting together for the last five years and they've been given the knowledge now that they have been resurrected on several occasions. But Adam was only brought back to be a pawn in the game that the angels were playing with Dean.
I was really disappointed that the writers didn't include any mention of Adam after he died. Maybe it's because I'm a mom, but I don't see anyone as being expendable at all, or any more or less deserving of recognition for their actions.

I wanted Dean to have that closure that I feel a lot of us weren't given.

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blubird_pie May 17 2010, 03:45:02 UTC
RIght! I think that Sam really choosing his death, and saving the world through it, vs. Adam not choosing at all and dying purely from Michael's selfishness make Adam's death seem more wrong, in a way, because of its pointless. On top of that, I can totally see Dean punishing himself because Adam basically took the bullet (Michael) in Dean's place.

I thought there were some vague murmurings that s6 would be kinda like s1, looking for someone? And maybe that someone will be Adam, who could for all we know be resurrected like Sam! I think that'd be cool.

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slayerkate May 17 2010, 03:51:40 UTC
I would really love if that's what they did with season six. Anything where Adam gets to come back, I'm fine with. I can't stomach the idea of him meaning absolutely nothing to anyone, after what he went through.

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slayerkate May 17 2010, 03:23:44 UTC
Thank you.

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keerawa May 17 2010, 04:16:38 UTC
He will never know Adam. Never know what kind of pizza he liked; if he had a favorite kind of laundry soap. Sam liked Tide. Dean used whatever the fuck he could find.
Wow. Thank you.

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slayerkate May 17 2010, 04:51:56 UTC
You're welcome. :)

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slayerkate May 17 2010, 16:26:56 UTC
I'm surprised by the lack of fanfic regarding Adam's death. It saddens me that a person who played a role in the apocalypse, simply because he was forced to do so, means nothing to anyone after he's gone. I don't believe that any death is meaningless. And while I am aware that Adam is fictional, I wonder how anyone else that watches Supernatural can be okay with his lack of a mention - how would they feel if they were treated this way?

I really hope they bring him back, too. Considering the way that Castiel, Bobby, and Sam were all resurrected, it would be extremely callous for the writers to not do the same for Adam.

I'm glad that so many people are responding to this fic. I needed to write it because I needed to read it, too.

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slayerkate May 17 2010, 17:14:04 UTC
Thank you.

When Dean was saying, at the end of the episode, "I lost my brother," my heart felt like it had been ripped to shreds. As a friend of mine mentioned, Jensen should have said something about that line. Dean would NEVER overlook any of his family members, biological or otherwise.

When I found out that the guys were getting a younger brother, I started incorporating one in some role-playing games I'm part of. I wanted to make him someone that would add to the existing relationship between Sam and Dean, but I knew he shouldn't just be a clone of either of them. Somehow, I gave him culinary skills, with the explanation being that he had to cook for himself... and then the show had him say this exact same thing. So I do feel that my characterization is canonical. The only real difference is that I named him Zack (I don't like the name Adam. Personal reasons.).

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angel_gospel May 17 2010, 17:25:19 UTC
This. Is. Perfect!

I felt exactly as you did when I read some of the reaction fics, and people were pretty much ignoring the fact that Adam existed. And I hated that Dean barely thought about it in the show (Kripke was a terribly neglectful bastard).

And this fic is redeeming. I love the way you write Dean's thoughts. I feel like that's how he really should have felt - mourning not just because he lost Sam, but because he lost Adam before he even got to know him. Thanks for writing this! I hope Adam's back next season (maybe the new writers will be less insensitive).

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slayerkate May 17 2010, 17:33:04 UTC
Thank you for reading. I feel like the community you created has become almost like a support group to deal with Adam's death. It was handled incredibly poorly.
I've considered that maybe the characters don't remember Adam, like their memories of him have been erased. But that still feels incredibly cheap and a little too much like a reversal of Dawn from BtVS.

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