Dead & Damned Part III

[weslyn]

The THIRD part! Thanks for all the lovely feedback. This is my first time writing in Harry's POV and hopefully I do just as good with him as Bob.
Previous chapters: Part I, Part II

Chapter 3
TV!Harry POV
PGish because this one's kinda tame on the language and sexuality.
Disclaimer: Oh right, I don't own them. Tell that to my plot bunnies. What? You

Comments

[innogen]

Wow! Everything is in character! It's like the TV Verse, as in Murphy doesn't know about Bob and all that, but the Book Verse, in how Harry gets his work done.

I feel so bad for Bob, and yet he is doing an admirable job in trying to make up for his earlier tantrum for Harry's lack of affections by playing 'Matchmaker'. Despite, of course, his snarky attitude. Perhaps he feels he needs some control over Harry's long term romantic situation. The thought runs through my mind that, subconsciously, Bob wishes Harry to procreate so that he doesn't get 'stuck on the shelf' as another story so recently put it.

And Bob definitely has touch envy.

Great job with this chapter. You are doing a wonderful job with writing. So never stop and never give up. It's okay to doubt yourself once in a while as long as you keep writing anyway, and that goes for anything you write.

~Inny

[weslyn]

... Wow. I think you've given me a confidence boost to last me an entire week. This comment alone made me go write another two pages...

Hm, I haven't read much of the book-verse, but I keep finding out that I'm writing in cannon - as my friend keeps pointing out to me as she devours book after book. It's a little creepy that I'm ending up being dead on with some of this stuff.

Great job with this chapter. You are doing a wonderful job with writing. So never stop and never give up. It's okay to doubt yourself once in a while as long as you keep writing anyway, and that goes for anything you write.

A most sincere thanks.

*goes off to write more*

[sheamackenzie]

::points:: You... you.... wibblemonster!

Bwah! You're just wearing them all down, aren't you?

And I'm adopting the term 'snugs' as well. ^_^ Too brilliant not to steal.

It's a very odd feeling when you realize that you want to cuddle a skull. You've made me wierder. That's scary.

::breaks out the candy to wait::

[weslyn]

I have a tendency to make people who come in contact (even virtually) with me weirder... perhaps I should invest in a sign.

Wibblemonster? If that means I break them down until they find themselves in one another's arms and still in denial, why then yes. I am a wibblemonster. Hee hee. I find the longer the wait, the more the wanting, more wanting = really damn good smut. And oh yes, there will be smut.

*eyes candy*

[sheamackenzie]

I'll share the candy for the promise of happy(smutty) ending....

I've got cookies too.... ::bribes::

[weslyn]

I've been thinking up happy/smutty endings all morning - the problem is choosing which way to go... but alas, that won't be for a few more chapters yet. The fourth installment - which I've currently got 3 or 4 pages written will be the longest installment thus far - it's a major plot shift. I can't call it a turning point, cause I don't know where that would fall or even what it would be just yet - the plot bunnies are breeding.

... What kind of cookies...? *hungry look*

[theprimrosepath]

I think you have the Harry-voice down just fine. And this:
Murphy wasn’t the type of girl you could be all worried about with out getting a verbal slap upside the head

I don't think Murphy is anyone's idea of "girl," and she'd probably smack Harry for calling her that, but it's totally like Harry to think it. :)

Also I like your use of details, like Bob's Sidling Gate of Charisma +2. Nice. :)

[weslyn]

Sliding Gate of Charisma +2

Mwuahahahahahahahahaa! Fantastic!

But no, really. Watch the episodes on YouTube sometime (search user: jampot5000) - I swear to gods he does that! Whenever he walks up to Harry because he has an idea or he wants something. Speaking of details... I should add in somewhere Bob fidgeting with his ring.

[camelfeathers]

*g* the mental image of Harry jumping up in the air to avoid what he was standing on is priceless. Your Harry voice is just like listening to the narrative... "every once in a while it can get under my skin - and right then I was feeling kind of itchy." I can hear it! :)

*pats Bob's skull* He makes a terrible matchmaker :D. /Since i can't have you, dammit to the four hells, take _this_ woman. She's right here on your _couch_ for Herne's sake./ You do jealous!Bob and clueless!Harry so well-- this is brilliant :). More!

[phoenixknght86]

"Even better, you bag the wench and let me watch"

To quote a favorite character...lol.

[weslyn]

Since i can't have you, dammit to the four hells, take _this_ woman. She's right here on your _couch_ for Herne's sake.

ROFL. Precisely.

I wouldn't call Harry clueless - or at least it's not intentional. I'm going for a more realistic take - Harry views Bob as his friend, a very, very dear friend, so he hasn't yet started seeing Bob in a romantic lighting - but when he does. Oh boy, there shall be massive guh-sexy-mind implode-ness involved. Well, hopefully. It's what I'm aiming for at least.

[phoenix64]

Who curses a toaster? Hee hee.

What is Bob thinking? Hmmm. Can't wait to find out!

[weslyn]

Hee hee, I must make a confession. The toaster bit was a nod to Foamy and the one episode "Amytiville Toaster" Watch

[havlockvetinari]

0.0 FOAMY!!!!! *flail*

<< >>

Please ignore the rabid enthusiasm of the card-carrying Foamy-cult-fan....

You need to work in a refrence to the Kavorkian Scarf *snerk*

[weslyn]

Sure. ^_^ I'll just add that into the list of things Harry keeps in his lab. ROFL!