Title: An Honour
Author:
sirmioneforeverPairing(s)/Character(s): Sirius/Hermione
Rating: M15
Prompt #: #172, The one that makes him want to become a father, in spite of his fears regarding the Black genes. Bonus point for a scene from the future showing it turned out perfectly alright.
Word count: 1,422Summary: Sirius works through his fears of becoming a father and realises that it's the best thing in the world.
Warnings: Highlight to read *swearing*
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters. Everything belongs to JKR, the publishers, or Time Warner Inc. No profit is being made and no copyright infringement is intended.
A/N:Thanks to my wonderful beta _.
Hermione and Sirius were sat on their sofa discussing the issue of children for what seemed like the thousandth time.
“Are you sure about this Hermione? What if I’m never ready to give you children?” Sirius asked softly.
“I’m sure Sirius. I love you, and if we don’t have a child then it’s not the end of the world. We will have Teddy, James and the new baby to dote on, and we can be the aunt and uncle that spoil them relentlessly,” Hermione replied.
“Thank you for being so understanding Hermione,” Sirius said.
“You don’t have to thank me Sirius. I will be here no matter what you decide.”
“I feel like I do though. This is something that I know that you want and I feel like I’m holding you back. I do want to have a child with you, but I am scared that I will mess it up. When I grew up there was only one man in the family that I could look up to in any way and he wasn’t around much.”
“That was your Uncle Alphard right?” Hermione asked remembering that Sirius had told her he was the one who left gold to him after he died.
“Yes. Mother never liked him that much because he was more tolerant of people’s beliefs than she was. They were raised by the same parents, but he was never as stringent as she was.”
“Was there anyone else?” Hermione asked curiously.
“No,” Sirius replied shaking his head. “Not until I met Mr Potter, James’s father, when I was thirteen. He showed me what a real father was like and it was an eye opener. I had never seen that kind of affection before, and didn’t know it existed until then.”
“Then follow his lead. Follow your instincts and follow Mr Potter, and James. I am sure you were great with Harry as he and Lily named you Harry’s godfather. You are your own person Sirius, not your family. If you need proof that you can overcome that then look at Andromeda. She raised Tonks and Teddy and look at how the both of them turned out,” Hermione said softly but firmly.
“I know I’m not them, but they are a part of me and I cannot ignore that. I may have been good with Harry in the beginning, but I fucked up when I chose revenge on Wormtail over him. I did the same thing my father did to me, and what my grandfather did to him, choosing something over the most important thing in my life. I’ve done it once and I never want to do it again but I’m scared that I will.”
“Whenever the time comes I am sure that you won’t do it again. You’ve learnt your lesson Sirius, and understood the consequences of it,” Hermione said softly.
“Thank you. You are the most amazing woman in the world,” said Sirius.
-0-0-0-0-
Sirius smiled as he watched Hermione hold the newest addition to the Potter family.
The picture stirred something inside of him and he suddenly couldn’t wait to see Hermione holding their child. He had never felt the desire to be a father so strongly before, but he had also never felt more ready. All Sirius knew was that despite his previous fears and anxieties he wanted to have a child with his wife.
It had been a year since he and Hermione had spoken of having a child, and during that time he spent many hours looking after James and many of the Weasley grandchildren. His confidence had grown the more he looked after them to the point where he felt comfortable doing it on his own.
Hermione lifted her head and looked at him. Her smile was dazzling and it took everything he had not to tell her right there and then what he wanted.
Although Harry and Ginny knew about Sirius’s anxieties, he thought that his wife should be the first to know that he had changed his mind. They probably wouldn’t tell anyone they were trying until a few months time or even until Hermione was pregnant.
-0-0-0-0-0-0-
Another year later
“I’m going to kill you Sirius Black!” Hermione shouted as another contraction ripped through her.
“You don’t mean that, love,” Sirius chided softly.
“Of course I mean it. It’s your fault that I’m in this mess anyway,” she said glaring at him.
“Just think that it will be worth it in the end as we will have a baby,” Sirius said taking her hand.
“I know it will be, but it hurts so much,” Hermione said almost crying.
“I’m sure it does, love, and I am sure it won’t last that much longer now your waters have burst,” Sirius said trying to reassure her.
A Healer came through the door and said, “Hello Mrs Black, I’ve come to see how far dilated you are and if you’re ready to push yet. How far apart are you contractions?”
“Every minute.” Hermione replied gritting her teeth as another contraction started to hit.
The Healer measured the diameter of her cervix by measuring it with a gloved finger.
“You’re nine centimetres dilated. You can start pushing on the next contraction. I will go and get the rest of the team.”
The Healer walked out and came back in with two other Healers who would be helping with the delivery.
“Tell me when the next contraction starts and we will tell you to push.” the Healer said.
“It’s starting now,” Hermione whimpered.
“I want you to push on three; one, two, three.”
Hermione let out an agonising scream pain, and Sirius tried to whisper calming words to her.
“It’s crowning. Push again on three; one, two, three.”
After another agonising scream finished, a crying baby could be heard.
“You did it love,” Sirius said kissing her forehead.
“You’ve got a boy,” the Healer announced.
“Did you hear that Hermione? We’ve got a boy,” Sirius said emotionally.
Hermione smiled tiredly and asked, “Can I hold him?”
“Of course,” the Healer replied and placed a bundle in her arms.
“Beautiful,” she murmured.
“You both are,” Sirius said looking at them.
Hermione cooed and smiled at her son.
“What are we going to choose for his middle name, love?” Sirius asked.
They had both agreed upon Sebastian as a first name pretty quickly, but they had disagreed on what his middle name should be.
“I was thinking maybe Regulus after your brother,” Hermione replied looking up shyly.
“Are you sure Hermione?” he asked.
“I’m sure. I know that you cared for him despite the fact that you didn’t get on well. I know that you have been trying to find a way to honour him and what he did, and what better way than naming our son after him?”
Sirius felt the tears in his eyes as his emotions rose. Hermione was right; he had been trying to do something to honour his brother but hadn’t thought any of his plans were good enough.
“Sebastian Regulus Black. It sounds great Hermione,” Sirius said smiling as his tears fell.
-0-0-0-0-0-
Eleven years later
“Dad,” Sebastian whined.
“What? Can’t I give my son a hug before he goes off to Hogwarts?” Sirius asked pulling back to look at his son.
“It’s embarrassing dad,” Sebastian replied.
“No it’s not; it just means that I love you.”
“Stop embarrassing him Sirius,” Hermione joked as she stopped next to him.
“It’s not…okay I’ll stop,” Sirius sighed as he saw his wife’s face.
“It’s okay dad, I love you too,” Sebastian said.
“I know you do, son,” Sirius replied smiling.
“I’m going to miss you. Promise me you won’t get into trouble,” Hermione asked.
“I won’t do mum,” Sebastian said while rolling his eyes.
The train whistled and the last students filed onto it.
Sirius helped carry Sebastian’s trunk into a compartment which the Potter siblings were sitting.
“Good luck Sebastian. Write to your mother and I to let us know how you are and what house you’ve been sorted in. Goodbye son,” Sirius said putting his hand on Sebastian’s shoulder.
“Thanks dad. I will write tomorrow to let you know where I’m sorted,”
Sirius nodded his head and stepped off the train as the conductor came to shut the door.
Sebastian hung out of the open window and waved goodbye to his parents.
Sirius waved back and realised that taking a chance and having a child was the best thing he had ever done. Sebastian was an amazing young man and Sirius was honoured to be his father.