001 | Video

[ebony_mask]

[The communicator clicks on, but the user has not realized he can't make a phone call to his personal assistant in another universe. The video is just mottled shades of blacks and grays as the camera has been pressed against his face. There's the sound of footsteps crunching over dirt in the background. Then a voice that may be familiar to some.]

Comments

audio

[whipfist]

Not dead.

[Audio because he still thinks he's on the phone]

[ebony_mask]

Who the fuck is this?

[whipfist]

You first, new kid.

[ebony_mask]

[He snorts in disbelief.]

What the fuck kinda way is that to talk to your boss? You're fired, you brain donor. When I get back, your ass is mine.

[video]

[he_is_wild]

[The camera facing towards a wall, since Joker clicked it on from his position on his floor with a growling hyena. His voice speaks, low and amused]

Welcome to Canada. But the answer might also be "You're dead".

[Audio because he still thinks he's on the phone]

[ebony_mask]

[He's speechless for a moment. When he speaks, it's almost under his breath.]

...shit.

[Video]

[he_is_wild]

[Joker spins the NV and smiles into the camera. His cheekbones are hallow and his eyes sunken in. He looks like he's barely eaten or slept for a long time but he definitely also looks amused]

Don't swear. It's simply not polite.

[Audio]

[ebony_mask]

[Roman jerks the NV away from his head at the sound of Joker's voice, revealing the right side of his face, but he still thinks he's on the phone connected to his personal assistant's cellular.]

How did you get this phone?

Voice;

[mindf_cks]

You're arrested.

[Audio because who was phone etc]

[ebony_mask]

Scarecrow?

[mindf_cks]

[ hrrk. Beat. ]

Unfortunately not. Perhaps you should try dialing the right number?

[ebony_mask]

That is a pack of dirty lies, you pretentious sack of straw. Did you gas me?

[voice]

[tokissity]

[She has no idea of what the hell he's talking about, but if there was a giant fly trap? She was most likely responsible. Hey, she wasn't complaining.]

Oh dear. My baby didn't give you any trouble, did it?

[Audio etc]

[ebony_mask]

[He growls angrily]

What the hell did you do, you crazy bitch?

[tokissity]

Who knows~?

[Because she sure didn't.]

Why don't you tell me?

[ebony_mask]

Correct me if I'm rememberin' this wrong, but you and your little clown rudely interrupted a very personal moment I was having with our mutual friend Catwoman after bein' brought back from the dead as a flying super zombie. One minute I got Miss Puss strapped in my chair, ready to pluck out her eyeballs and cram 'em down her throat, the next minute I'm being digested in a motherfuckin' over-sized Venus fly trap faster than I can regenerate, and then suddenly I wake up in a goddamn baseball diamond packed to the gills with pigs.

Ring any bells, sweetcheeks?

[cowboy_newsie]

You're dead and arrested.

[Audio]

[ebony_mask]

[Roman is gritting his teeth with frustration and without cheeks, the sound is carrying.]

Ooooh, you think you're funny, huh? A real fuckin' comedian, that it? I don't pay you morons to crack witty responses, got it? Where the hell is Li?

[Audio]

[cowboy_newsie]

You don't pay me at all, actually. And say please.

[Audio]

[ebony_mask]

Who the hell is this? I am gonna cut out your tongue and use it to choke you to death.