Suffer The Little Children 1.0
Warnings- Child Abuse, Starvation, Cutting, Anoxic (Eating Disorders), Character Death and Potential Rape.
My only request is if you have triggers to any of this don’t read this. Please. Don’t read it if you have triggers.
Parings- Frank/Gerard (Won't be for awhile though)
Suffer The Little Children
Chapter Zero: Suffocated
My name isn't much of an importance. I was never called by it at home anyway. I can't even remember the last time that bitch- my mother or what she liked me to call her when I was younger- Mommy. I haven't called her that in years, it was when I realized that what she was doing was wrong and I tried to fight back. That was a big mistake on my part. You see I'm an only child and my father left that bitch years ago. He was smart, wish he had taken me with him.
I wish he had. My mother resorts to these "games" when I'm a bad child. For instance, I'm not allowed to get a single detention or anything lower than a B+ on a report card, when I was younger she was sweet to me and never did anything wrong, she started doing these games when I was seven after dad left. After he left my life went to hell. These games were varies things she came up with, she's forced me at one point to drink bleach, I was sick for days after that, throwing up whatever I ate. Other "games" involved me being beaten or other things that made me as much I didn't want to scream in pain for hours or feel it for days. Sometimes though they were even worse, my mother loved to use me when she got lonely, complaining I was the reason dad left her. That because of me he thought she wasn't pretty anymore, and so she started forcing me to. I don't even want to say it. It makes me feel vile and so repulsed.
I forgot to mention to, if I got low grades she would let me only eat once a week and it was a piss poor amount of food. Food was taken away from me for other reasons too, and she always seemed to know when I took food at school because she had forced me to get sick at one point, and vomit up frozen foods I had stolen one day, she had made me ate that in vomit form and that brought around a whole new round of vomiting, and she just laughed at me calling me a bitch and kicking my in the side with her heels, I was filthy by that point and reeked of vomit because I had gotten sick so many times.
Not that anyone actually cared and did anything to help me at school. They thought I was some emo-bitch and the teachers believed my lies of falling into things or tripping down stairs. No one really paid me notice, it's not like I let my grades slip and I came to school dressed normally. The only thing my mom had let me do that had made me happy was pierce my lip; the bitch had said I was able to do it because I had been such a good boy. I was sixteen now, she had broken me into all this at fourteen. In school I fell out of social clichés because I was so quiet and because I hardly even spoke in less spoken too. I didn't even look up half the time or answer if someone called my name. It just had no meaning in less a teacher said it, I didn't answer other kids.
As much as I loved the peacefulness of school, it had to end. It always did. I tried not to think as I entered my house. I tried not to think. My mother was sitting by the table tapping her fingers against her leg. "Homework?" I nodded. Homework first "games" later. It was always the same, let me do my work then beat the shit out of me. "Bathroom tonight Frankie." Her voice was a taunt, I felt sick on the other hand.
My homework was done much too fast it seemed and my mother was humming as she mixed a bucket up something up. She beckoned me over with her finger. "You know the rules my precious child. You have a half hour to clean. She shoved me into the bathroom and I fell face first onto the floor the door slamming closed behind me, the bucket near my face. The mixture produced a fine grey like smoke into the air, and each breath I took was poison. It burned my lungs, it made them go raw, and I choked on my breath. I coughed roughly into the floor my fingers twitching. Half hour, come on Frankie, you can do this don't think about it, find a way to get clean air.
I don't know how I managed to even move. My lungs felt raw, they felt like they were being gone in seconds, it hurt so much too even breathe. I let my fingers grab at the damp rag she gave me, and pressed it against my nose. It helped a little not much, it hurt still. It felt like my lungs were on fire. Was there an air vent in here? The air vent was on the floor, small but enough, I pressed my face over it and kicked the bucket to the other side of the bathroom away from me. Every time it gave air, I would take a breath of it, but it hurt as well to do so, by the time that was done with, I felt close to passing out, and the bitch grabbed me by my hair pulling me to my feet and dragging me out of the room. "Such a good boy tonight Frankie. If you're good tomorrow maybe I'll let you gain one friend." She tells me.
That's another thing. No friends for me in less she tells me I can. It's either that or more pain. "Maybe I'll let you have someone over. Wouldn't you like that? Being able to talk again?" She's smirking at me. I would beg, to talk but I know better, she doesn't like it when I talk in less I'm moaning, and or screaming or the mix of both. She touches her fingers to my hair. "You're so quiet tonight. Not one outburst. You're being good. So good tonight Frankie." She kisses my forehead; I want to throw up at the display of caring affection. "You're allowed to have one friend Frankie. Just one. But fuck up and forget it. You can talk to one person." She tells me.
"I...I don't want to…" I whisper my throat feels wrecked and I feel like I'm going to get sick, but instead I cough into my hand, and feel a sticky liquid, and I realize its blood, blood. I threw up blood. It makes me grow pale.
"You don't want to Frankie? You don't want to? I thought you would. You like being here alone with mommy don't you?" She whispers against my ear, and I feel vile in more ways than one. "Go to bed sweetie, if you're lucky, I'll give you food tomorrow." She tells me, and I scurry away before she can change her mind.
I crawl onto my bed, and pull the sheets over my body, it's so weak, and I just barely get by eating from school. I close my eyes and fall into an effortless sleep, my own blood staining my hands.
Welcome to my life.
Chapter Two: http://sinsrose.livejournal.com/10094.html