Words. Words.

[silly_imp]

Words have power. Our choice of words influences both our own psyche and the person who hears them. Aware of their power, I try to choose my words precisely; and be aware when my words are trying to trick me

Comments

[dancingwolfgrrl]

I often use "can" for things where the question is not really about whether or not I/we/the other person *can* do something, but whether we will, or may, or are willing to do it.

[silly_imp]

Me too. Can/could. It seems to be generally understood that the question is more about willingness rather than capability.

[adamofeden]

A lot of communications problems centre on precisely the imprecise use of those words. Or their use without a followup question.

One that I have frequently seen is an employee being asked by their boss (or perhaps a client), 'Can you do xyz?' To which the employee answers, "Yes." Sadly missing is the context, condition or consequence; "I can do this and that means delaying abc..."

The question being asked was, 'Can you do this without any impact (at least on anything I care about)?'. The question being answered is, "Are you capable of doing this task?"...

[silly_imp]

Yes! Explicit clarity is needed more often than we use it. When answering questions or taking directions, I like to clarify any unspoken assumptions. The thing is, as you pointed out, that often takes some foresight or knowledge of the topic.