A Second Chance 2 - betad
I know it is ages since I posted any. I hope to do it little more the comming year.
Previous chapter see earlier entries
Chapter 2
She struggled with herself. Why could only a mention of being outside her frozen and terrified? By now she should have overcome the fear of public places. It had been so many years since the kidnapping and tortured... She had spent so many hours in hospital and therapy that she could think about it without it making her cold like ice. However, hearing and thinking about being in places surrounded by people made her shake and retreat inside herself, although there were exceptions and a few times a year she did manage to get outside. Why could she not go to the school with Cía?
She so much wanted to be a good mum, a normal mum. Sidonie know she never would be. It was not only the visible scars that make her different, it was one inside her that went too deep for her to trust others to see her as a normal person.
She registered some of what her daughter said, was aware of the brush being taken from her, but it would take some time to completely recover from her attack, and for now she could only allow herself to be taken care off. Lucía knew exactly what to do; this wasn’t the first time this had happened. They had worked out with Olivia, her therapist, how to handle the attacks.
Lucía moved her Mum over to a sofa in the studio, helping her lie down on it. She was unfocussed and unresponsive. Remembering what Olivia had said, that in the first ten to twenty minutes of an attack, her mother would only be able to follow simple commands and need constant, reassuring, Lucía stayed with her, stroking her mother’s cheek and holding her hand.
Lucía was pleased that she been taught how to deal with her Mum's attacks. She had a vague memory of her dad doing this the first times she seen her mother take one of her attacks. She hadn’t been very old then. After that he was gone, Olivia and her mother had explained the special situation and had taught her what to do.
This time when the trigger wasn’t that bad her mother soon came around. Lucía felt her squeeze her hand back and her eyes started to focus.
“Sid…? Sidonie…? Mum… Do you want anything to drink… eat?” Lucía’s hand gently stroked her cheek.
“Mmmm… what?” Relieved she found she could speak again.
“Mum… I asked if you wanted anything to drink or eat?” her daughter repeated.
“Yes, please.” Sidonie’s voice was little hoarse.
Lucía went to the kitchen to get some water and fix a sandwich. She wondered if she would call Olivia to tell what happened, but thought she would ask her mother first. As a rule she would have called Olivia after every attack, this one hadn’t lasted so long. Lucia thought that she and her Mum could handle it and didn't really want to bother Olivia.
Walking over to the calendar, she looked up when her mother's next meeting was. Seeing that it was tomorrow, she decided not to call.
Coming back into the studio she saw that her mother had sat up on the sofa.
“I’m sorry, my dear.” Sidonie said when she saw her daughter.
“It’s me that should be saying sorry!” replied Lucía. “I have some water and a sandwich for you.”
“Thanks.” Sidonie took the things. “Have you any homework?”
“Nothing big. We're discussing Hamlet at the drama class tomorrow. You know that I've read that a few times already.”
Sidonie smiled. She had introduced Shakespeare to Lucía a few years ago, seeing her love of plays and theater. Even if she found it hard to go outside, she wouldn’t forbid her daughter anything like that. There were books and films they could see. She tried to do the best she could. Some of the things Lucía really had a talent for and a love of, came from her father, so those was things she absolutely couldn’t deny her daughter.
It tugged guiltily on her heart that she still hadn’t told Lucía who her father was… Deep inside she was happy that he had never gone back to his profession. It meant it was easier to avoid him.
Looking over at her daughter she saw more of herself in her looks than him. The only thing that her daughter and her didn’t share, was the color of their eyes. She had green and Lucía had brown, a shade lighter than his.
“Mum, don't cry.”
Lucía's voice woke her up from her thoughts. Sidonie quickly dried the tears on her shirts sleeve.
“Will you perform any of Hamlet in class?” Sidonie tried to cover that she had been lost in thought.
“Yes, we will do a few parts of it and I will do Ophelia,” she replied, non-plussed. Often, after an attack, her mother was emotional and could be lost in thought a lot. Olivia had said that trying to talk of daily things was good.
“’And lose the name of action," Sidonie began. "Soft you, now, The fair Ophelia! - Nymph, in thy orisons, Be all my sins remembered’”
“’Good my Lord," Lucía replied. "How does your honor for this many a day?’”
“’I humbly thank you, well, well, well.’”
“’My lord, I have remembrances of yours, That I have longed to redeliver. I pray you now receive them’”
Sidonie smiled and hugged her daughter, “I don't think you'll have any problem.” Then she went on, “I’m tired. Can you take care of the paint and fix yourself something to eat?”
“It’s no problem.” Lucía hugged her back. “I might stay here and do some work myself.”
“Good, good.”
Sidonie stood up, taking her apron off before she left the studio. Lucía heard her steps through the hall to their bathroom and then later heard her mother’s bedrooms door close.
Previous chapter see earlier entries
Chapter 2
She struggled with herself. Why could only a mention of being outside her frozen and terrified? By now she should have overcome the fear of public places. It had been so many years since the kidnapping and tortured... She had spent so many hours in hospital and therapy that she could think about it without it making her cold like ice. However, hearing and thinking about being in places surrounded by people made her shake and retreat inside herself, although there were exceptions and a few times a year she did manage to get outside. Why could she not go to the school with Cía?
She so much wanted to be a good mum, a normal mum. Sidonie know she never would be. It was not only the visible scars that make her different, it was one inside her that went too deep for her to trust others to see her as a normal person.
She registered some of what her daughter said, was aware of the brush being taken from her, but it would take some time to completely recover from her attack, and for now she could only allow herself to be taken care off. Lucía knew exactly what to do; this wasn’t the first time this had happened. They had worked out with Olivia, her therapist, how to handle the attacks.
Lucía moved her Mum over to a sofa in the studio, helping her lie down on it. She was unfocussed and unresponsive. Remembering what Olivia had said, that in the first ten to twenty minutes of an attack, her mother would only be able to follow simple commands and need constant, reassuring, Lucía stayed with her, stroking her mother’s cheek and holding her hand.
Lucía was pleased that she been taught how to deal with her Mum's attacks. She had a vague memory of her dad doing this the first times she seen her mother take one of her attacks. She hadn’t been very old then. After that he was gone, Olivia and her mother had explained the special situation and had taught her what to do.
This time when the trigger wasn’t that bad her mother soon came around. Lucía felt her squeeze her hand back and her eyes started to focus.
“Sid…? Sidonie…? Mum… Do you want anything to drink… eat?” Lucía’s hand gently stroked her cheek.
“Mmmm… what?” Relieved she found she could speak again.
“Mum… I asked if you wanted anything to drink or eat?” her daughter repeated.
“Yes, please.” Sidonie’s voice was little hoarse.
Lucía went to the kitchen to get some water and fix a sandwich. She wondered if she would call Olivia to tell what happened, but thought she would ask her mother first. As a rule she would have called Olivia after every attack, this one hadn’t lasted so long. Lucia thought that she and her Mum could handle it and didn't really want to bother Olivia.
Walking over to the calendar, she looked up when her mother's next meeting was. Seeing that it was tomorrow, she decided not to call.
Coming back into the studio she saw that her mother had sat up on the sofa.
“I’m sorry, my dear.” Sidonie said when she saw her daughter.
“It’s me that should be saying sorry!” replied Lucía. “I have some water and a sandwich for you.”
“Thanks.” Sidonie took the things. “Have you any homework?”
“Nothing big. We're discussing Hamlet at the drama class tomorrow. You know that I've read that a few times already.”
Sidonie smiled. She had introduced Shakespeare to Lucía a few years ago, seeing her love of plays and theater. Even if she found it hard to go outside, she wouldn’t forbid her daughter anything like that. There were books and films they could see. She tried to do the best she could. Some of the things Lucía really had a talent for and a love of, came from her father, so those was things she absolutely couldn’t deny her daughter.
It tugged guiltily on her heart that she still hadn’t told Lucía who her father was… Deep inside she was happy that he had never gone back to his profession. It meant it was easier to avoid him.
Looking over at her daughter she saw more of herself in her looks than him. The only thing that her daughter and her didn’t share, was the color of their eyes. She had green and Lucía had brown, a shade lighter than his.
“Mum, don't cry.”
Lucía's voice woke her up from her thoughts. Sidonie quickly dried the tears on her shirts sleeve.
“Will you perform any of Hamlet in class?” Sidonie tried to cover that she had been lost in thought.
“Yes, we will do a few parts of it and I will do Ophelia,” she replied, non-plussed. Often, after an attack, her mother was emotional and could be lost in thought a lot. Olivia had said that trying to talk of daily things was good.
“’And lose the name of action," Sidonie began. "Soft you, now, The fair Ophelia! - Nymph, in thy orisons, Be all my sins remembered’”
“’Good my Lord," Lucía replied. "How does your honor for this many a day?’”
“’I humbly thank you, well, well, well.’”
“’My lord, I have remembrances of yours, That I have longed to redeliver. I pray you now receive them’”
Sidonie smiled and hugged her daughter, “I don't think you'll have any problem.” Then she went on, “I’m tired. Can you take care of the paint and fix yourself something to eat?”
“It’s no problem.” Lucía hugged her back. “I might stay here and do some work myself.”
“Good, good.”
Sidonie stood up, taking her apron off before she left the studio. Lucía heard her steps through the hall to their bathroom and then later heard her mother’s bedrooms door close.