Breaking Even - Chapter 2
(Poster by : Shriya_4)
Title: Breaking Even
Pairing: YooMin, YunJae, BFF!YooSu, Changmin-Centric
Length: Chaptered
Rating: R
Genre: Horror, Romance, Drama, Heavy!Angst, Band!Fic, Dark!Themes, Tragedy (Not Character Death)
Warnings: Strong Triggers. Violence, Sasaeng-culture, Rape, Torture, BDSM, Drugs, Language, PTSD.
Disclaimer : The Boys - Yeah. Right. The plot - All mine, any resemblance to any other work is purely coincidental.
Summary A sasaeng fan is out to get the boys. Feeding on the insecurities of the youngest member, she draws him and the other four into a world that's worse than death and the very reflection of hell on Earth.
Chapter 2:
“Neon nareul weonhae neon naege bbajyeo neon naege michyeo, neon na-ye no ye I got you- under my skin…”
You want me
You’ve fallen for me
You’re crazy over me
You can’t escape
I got you
Under my skin…
Changmin’s eyes opened wide as he stared unblinkingly at the wet ceiling above him, dried blood - chafing; sweat- rancid, coating his face like an intricate painting, his breathing ragged, his heartbeat shallow.
“Oppa, you’re awake?”
“What’s the point in pretending otherwise?” was what he wanted to ask her.
He chose to remain silent, unyielding to the provocative nature of the song and ignorant of the pain that was coursing through his system like a live wire.
“Is Oppa angry with me?” she asked, her voice silky and cruel.
Angry?
Is there an emotion stronger than anger? He wondered.
Hatred?
I think what I feel for you is greater than hatred.
“I love this song, Oppa. I sing it well too, don’t I? Maybe one day we’ll be able to sing together.”
“What do you want from me?” Changmin finally asked, his mouth ripping painfully along the frayed edges of his lips as they moved.
“Not from you, Oppa. Just you.”
He turned his head slowly and watched her rock back and forth as she sat in the corner of the basement, staring at him with glittering eyes and her hair plastered around her face - her lips chewed brown by guilt.
Not guilt, little Minnie…
Excitement.
“I told you already. We’re just playing a game.”
He watched her pick up the knife from beside her for the third time that night and shuddered in fear as she crawled towards him.
He wondered how many more times she’d slice the slick metal across his skin and how many more strands of hair she’d cut off of his head till she was satisfied with her collectibles.
“I don’t want to play. So, let me go, okay?” he said, his voice bordering on pleading as she leaned over to tighten the ropes around his legs and feet.
“I can’t do that. Not when I finally have you.”
She’s got you under her skin~
Out of my head.
Get out of my head.
Get out.
Get out.
Get out.
“LET ME GO HOME! LET ME GO, YOU CRAZY BITCH!” He finally cried as he felt her dig the knife into his skin for the umpteenth time, “WHY DO YOU KEEP DOING THIS TO ME?!”
“Shut up and stay still!” She whispered, yanking him up by the roots of his hair and then pressing her lips against his tenderly.
Tainted. Ruined.
He sobbed into her mouth, unable to fight back; too disoriented from the drugs and too incapacitated by the ropes around his limbs to even try.
He could taste coffee on her lips, but felt nothing but cold, stomach-churning revulsion at being so thoroughly violated by someone that meant close to nothing to him.
He cried out as she dug her sharp nails into the area under his eyes and gasped tearfully as she dragged them right down to his chin, leaving angry red scrapes to mar his already abused face.
“You’re mine. You aren’t going anywhere. If you want to go home then they have to want you home. But they’ll forget you soon. They’ll stop caring. You’ll stay with us. You’ll be with the people who really love you.”
As if on cue, the door to the basement opened and Changmin felt hope spark in his heart. The girl beside him turned her head and stared calculatingly at the shadows on the other side, causing him to fear for his hyungs, whom he hoped had come to rescue him.
He waited a heartbeat and felt his mind collapse as her face broke out into a welcoming grin.
No!
No please no!
“No!” He shouted, his tears falling fast and his sobs breaking out of his chest like a wounded animal.
“NO PLEASE!”
Four people walked into the room that night.
And Changmin never hated the number five more than he did from that point onward.
X
Yoochun shot up from his bed, sweat dripping down his forehead, his body wracking with sobs and shivers as he recalled Changmin’s battered form calling out for help.
“YOOCHUN HELP! Help me, Hyung! Please no! Help!”
Just a dream.
A dream.
He ran a trembling hand down his face and reached over to switch on the bedside lamp, flinching as a dull yellow light fell across the expanse of his room.
He looked at the second twin bed and sobbed harder as he took in the pristine white sheets, untouched and cold.
A blatant reminder of a missing Changmin.
Junsu shifted beside him, murmuring Changmin’s name like a well-learned mantra as he dreamed of a happier time when everything wasn’t nearly as fucked up.
Changmin would have smiled.
He would have made fun of Junsu for being a baby and sneaking into their room every other night because of nightmares.
And Junsu would have pouted and buried into Changmin’s sheets instead.
But that couldn’t happen anymore, could it?
There was no more Changmin.
There was no more anything.
Where are you?
Minnie…come home.
Everything felt so frighteningly real now.
Knowing that their maknae was hurt.
Knowing that the love of his life was lying at the mercy of God knows whom.
Knowing that they couldn’t do anything to save him.
All of it was so real.
And it’s your entire fault. A voice chanted bitterly in his head.
All of this is your fault.
You never deserved him.
You thrived on his jealousy.
You provoked his insecurities.
He would never have let himself be kidnapped if it wasn’t for you.
It’s you.
It’s you.
It’s all on you!
X
Jaejoong snuffed out his fiftieth something cigarette and gripped his hair with his fists.
Hyung, I don’t know what to do?
Hyung, Yoochun and Junsu…I can’t…it hurts.
Stop them.
Make them stop.
Please.
Hyung.
I won’t be able to live like this.
I’m jealous. I don’t want to be. But I am.
I love Junsu.
But I don’t love him with Yoochun.
I can’t tell them.
I want them to be happy.
I can never tell them.
But it hurts, Hyung.
Hyung.
It hurts.
It hurts.
Hyung.
Jaejoong shut his eyes as he recalled his late night conversations with Changmin, his heart aching with suppressed emotions as he recalled the younger’s tortured words.
“Jaejoong…” He heard Yunho call, rubbing his arms and holding him close.
“He was in so much pain, Yunnie. So much pain. And I told him to stop imagining things. And now I don’t know if I can ever apologise to him. Tell him I’m sorry for not caring more. Tell him that it will be okay. I don’t know where he is. He’s my Changmin and I don’t know. I don’t know how I can live knowing that if, god forbid, something happens to him that I didn’t pay more attention to him. I want him back, Yun. I want Minnie back.”
“We’ll find him,” Yunho whispered, rocking back and forth, trying so desperately to absorb some of his boyfriend’s pain.
“We’ll find him.”
X
It was three in the morning when their doorbell rang.
Jaejoong opened it with a bang while Yunho walked up behind him with a frown, searching the corridor for a sign of movement when he realized no one was there.
The lead singer glanced down in confusion when he felt his feet touch something wet and sticky.
They looked on in horrified shock as Jaejoong opened his mouth in a silent yell and turned to retch all over his boyfriend's feet, clutching on to him for support.
Junsu ran forward and caught their leader’s stumbling form and bit down on his lip to curb a blood curdling scream as he glanced at the floor.
“What?!” Yoochun shouted trying to push his way forward only to have Yunho push him back up against the wall.
“No!”
“What?!”
“Yunho!” Jaejoong shouted, hysterical dry sobs breaking through his mouth, as he looked down at mess on the floor, uncaring of the chaos, as members from different bands stumbled out of their own apartments in search of the source of the screaming.
Heechul who had managed to figure out what was happening first, froze, pushing back his own members as he took in the sight before him.
God no.
No.
This can’t be happening.
He turned shakily towards his own leader who’d run up behind him and murmured, “Hyung, call the police…”
“What?”
“CALL THE POLICE! NOW!” he shouted, his eyes burning and his body shaking in abominable fear.
Because it wasn’t right.
Not what he saw.
It couldn’t be.
No.
It wasn’t possible.
It couldn’t be.
But it was.
He saw it.
Because there on the floor…
Was a blood soaked cloth.
No.
Not just any cloth.
Changmin’s shirt.
Holding something that looked unsettlingly like clumps of Changmin’s hair, bits of skin.
And that just wasn’t right.
It couldn’t be.
Heechul threw up next.