Messy

[shoefiend]

Feeling a little lost. I'm turning 40 in about a month, and my entire body is conspiring against me. I'm out of work (again), and I don't particularly have any yearning to go back to work in a support role that doesn't get me anywhere. But where do I want to go? That's the big question. I don't know what I want to do when I I grow up. I used to

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[mystery_diva]

I can't type a long message on my phone, but saw this and thought maybe we're all having an early midlife crisis together. I just said to Rach in her post partly about missing the Toronto days of the last that I too miss my old Toronto life often. Maybe that's normal. I'm sorry you're feeling shitty. Losing a job is shitty and not knowing what job you want is shitty. But you're not shitty. I'd say you're pretty awesome. I hope an awesome, non-shitty job comes up soon.

Non-shitty hug.

[shoefiend]

Thanks. It was a pretty shitty day. I had a meeting at a recruiting office to talk about my qualifications and experience, and then she wanted to know my top three most important things I wanted in my next job. I couldn't answer her. Apart from "not another shitty boss", that is. I didn't phrase it like that, honest.
I think a midlife crisis sounds nice at this point. At least the shitty time will have a name. I'll come to Toronto and we'll all have lunch and many martinis and cry and laugh our asses off.

[mystery_diva]

I think that's a hard question to answer when you *need* a job. It's always easier to look for a job, and think about what you want, when you have one for some reason. It's totally worth exploring, but on the spot I think that's tough.

Lunch and martinis, yes please. In the meantime we'll set up a Skype thing. But, I looked it up and apparently to do a group video chat one member needs to have a premium account. Balls. I'll see if I can get a free trial or something....I think I saw something to that effect. I need to see when my French test will be and then we'll pick a day!

[shoefiend]

Yeah, a week later and I still don't have a clearer answer. Oh well. I updated my resume for her - she wanted a chronological style instead of a skills list - and I notified my references that they might get contacted. I have an interview for another association on Wednesday, and fingers crossed that will go ok. I have a ton of cramming to do between now and then, but first, WINE!

Speaking of booze, what about a google+ hangout? Would that be easier?

[starfishchick]

I'm sorry you're feeling this way. I'm both glad and sorry to tell you that you are not alone!! Things are shitty here too. :(

I hope you're doing a bit better today.

[shoefiend]

Oh hon, I have been reading your posts and can only offer the biggest of hugs. I think you're very brave to be facing things with the help of a therapist - that's something I know I should do, instead of loading everything onto J's shoulders.
Things are a little better this week, and I have an interview on Wednesday for an EA gig with an association in the life sciences sector - research & genetics. I'm scared shitless that they'll want someone with a background in biology, or at least NOT an arts person, but who knows. Transferable skills, baby!

[starfishchick]

Entertainingly, I saw the therapist tonight - she's retiring at the end of the year - and she asked how I felt about that and I said "relieved because you know about embarrassing about me and I never have to see you again but anxious because if I start with someone new I'm going to have to tell them all the embarrassing things about myself" and she said "if you'll talk to the new one, instead of putting up walls like you've done with me." Which, totally true. It's hard and stressful to talk about Shit You Don't Want To Talk About - can't she just magically fix me?

[starfishchick]

Also, good for you!!! You'll be great. Transferable skills are VALUABLE.

*hugs* ... or at least, *arm-pat*