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writerboy July 6 2010, 05:33:47 UTC
*needs to stop reading prompts at 2 am. This as the birth of the dust bunnies from The Big Comfy Couch is now head-canon*

Seconded!

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The Filth Wizard 1a/? joe_pike_junior July 6 2010, 06:37:14 UTC
Lightning-quick fill for this one, because I'm in a playful mood.

...

I put the carrier bags from Tesco down on the landing and fumble for my key. I can hear Holmes' music through the door. It's Rachmaninov, one of those ponderous, sweeping piano concerto sort of pieces. It makes me think that Holmes fancies himself to be a sort of Victorian-era madman, fopping around an attic room in a puffy shirt.

Not that I know anything about classical music. That's Holmes' area. All I know is that I like listening to Bob Dylan in the daytime, like any normal professional man in his early thirties. Okay, maybe once when I was drunk I put on Bob Seger and danced around clumsily, but seriously. My taste in music is a hundred times less crazy than Holmes ( ... )

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The Filth Wizard 1b/? joe_pike_junior July 6 2010, 06:37:35 UTC
Later on, we eat. Holmes pushes away his meal half-finished and lights another fag. I glance around the room: the gleaming sink, the dirty dishes piled next to it.

"Holmes." I take a deep breath. "Have you thought about taking on another case soon? I'm sure you'd be able to find something, and then things would be a little easier, money-wise." I wonder how long it's been since he was outside.

"All you ever do is harp on at me," Holmes says, taking a drag on his cigarette, his eyes narrowed to slits. He puts in a squeaky Scottish accent. He sounds like my Grandmother. "Get a job, Holmes. Stop snorting so much blow, Holmes, we can scarcely afford it. Clean the old pizza boxes off the toilet cistern, HolmesI take a deep breath, chewing my food very slowly. Holmes doesn't deal with anger well. He'll spend the whole night cleaning specks off the television screen. Meanwhile, I can't move three steps in this dump without gathering a dust bunny or an odd sock or an old violin string ( ... )

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Re: The Filth Wizard 1b/? writerboy July 6 2010, 06:58:18 UTC
Poor OCD (but well-written) Holmes! D:

The phone in the Ziploc was the icing on the cake; I live with someone who Ziplocs everything from clothing to loose change so that nothing gets "cross-contaminated". OMG, you captured that vice well. Bravo!

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Re: The Filth Wizard 1b/? joe_pike_junior July 7 2010, 05:29:17 UTC
Yeah, it turned out to be more black than black comedy, but I'm glad you like it!

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Re: The Filth Wizard 1b/? joe_pike_junior July 7 2010, 05:29:56 UTC
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

I'M GLAD YOU LIKE IT. HOLMES IS AS MAD AS A MEATAXE IN EVERY AGE, IT APPEARS.

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Re: The Filth Wizard 1b/? wheres_walnut July 6 2010, 12:53:13 UTC
I AM.

SO COMPLETELY.

AND UTTERLY.

ALL ENCOMPASSING...LY.

IN LOVE.

WITH THIS.

+

"Those clothes need to stay there. I've just sprayed them with Febreze."

LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL.

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Re: The Filth Wizard 1b/? joe_pike_junior July 7 2010, 05:31:07 UTC
YAY! I AM GLAD TO SERVE.

Also, I went into the chatroom once yesterday and once today, and it's been empty both times. Is it still SHkinkmeme?

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Re: The Filth Wizard 1b/? wheres_walnut July 7 2010, 10:49:51 UTC
It is still SHkinkmeme. Chat is weird like that. Sometimes you'll go in and there are a BILLION people, sometimes it will be empty. Apparently it was really slow yesterday, you're the second person I've heard this from.

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Re: The Filth Wizard 1b/? cutebutpsycho99 July 7 2010, 14:08:06 UTC
I've popped in and it's been quiet the past few days. I don't know if it's the Fourth of July holiday for us Yanks, or summer in general.

And so, I've resorted to tormenting poor Walbutt in LOLCAT SPEAK.

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Re: The Filth Wizard 1b/? wheres_walnut July 7 2010, 14:31:28 UTC
As long as you've called off your be-feathered squad of companions....

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Re: The Filth Wizard 1b/? cutebutpsycho99 July 7 2010, 14:34:15 UTC
Y HALLO THAR DR. QUACKERS! WHUT? U WANT 2 SEE WALLBUTT? SUR! TELL HER I WANT MAH BUKKET! AND MAH FOOTIE ART!

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Re: The Filth Wizard 1b/? wheres_walnut July 7 2010, 14:38:34 UTC
D: I HATE YOU SO MUCH SOMETIMES.

THERE WILL HOPEFULLY BE FOOTIE LATER TODAY. I'M KIND OF STALLED.

AND LOLOLOLOLOL SILLY SQUIRREL.

... )

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Re: The Filth Wizard 1b/? cutebutpsycho99 July 7 2010, 14:42:42 UTC
*DUG VOICE* SQUIRREL!

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