Fic: Empty (Kane RPS, Chris/Steve, PG-13)
Title: Empty
Author: sheryden
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1413
Fandom: Kane RPS
Pairings: Chris/Steve
Warnings None
Disclaimer: I do not own these people, and the story within is just the fruit of my vivid imagination.
Summary: It broke Chris’s heart to wake up to an empty bed.
Notes 1: When I started this, I pictured a nice, wistful piece about the guys not finding time to spend together. Then it turned into this. I think I blame that clip of Chris talking about why he wrote "A Different Kind of Knight." I’ll make them happy in the next story. Honest. :) Written for angst_bingo for the Wild Card prompt “waking up in bed alone.”
Chris sat up in bed, savagely rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. He glanced at the empty expanse of sheets and blankets next to him. It had been a long time since he’d woken up with a warm body beside him, and as he stared at the emptiness, he had to bite back the feelings of longing that had been nipping at his heart lately. Sure, he had sexual encounters. But usually, they happened somewhere other than his place, and he left right after-or at least before morning.
He told himself he couldn’t afford long-term emotional attachments. He wasn’t good relationship material by any means, and he knew that. He was always on the move, always working toward the next rung on the ladder. He was used to having his own space and his own routine. And according to at least one of his former lovers, he was impossible to live with, and he drank too much.
Still, there was a part of Chris that wanted something more than a casual roll in the hay. He wanted to wake up next to someone who loved him, and he wanted to have an outlet for all hearts and flowers emotions he kept bottled up inside.
As he sat there lost in thought, his mind drifted to Steve, of all places. Steve. His friend. His partner. His bandmate. They’d screwed around a little over the years, usually when they were both drunk and lonely. But they’d never made more of it than it was. They were friends, and sometimes they got physical. And afterward, one of them always got up and left, even if it was just to stagger out and collapse on the couch or head two doors down to a separate hotel room.
Still, Chris couldn’t pretend he’d never wondered what it would be like to wake up next to Steve. Steve had stuck with him longer than any of his romantic partners had, and he understood Chris and accepted him the way he was. As he gazed at the vacant sheets and pillow, it occurred to Chris that it might not be all that hard to just shift their relationship a little, make the move from friendship to something more.
They already got together on a regular basis to hang out or eat meals together-one of them often cooked for the other. That sounded like a date to Chris. They talked to each other about their problems. They’d driven each other to the ER, brought each other chicken soup to help fight off colds, bought each other presents. They’d met each other’s parents, and they even lived in the same house part of the year. Shit, they were practically married already.
It would be so easy to redefine things just a little, and it could be so good for both of them.
Chris pinched the bridge of his nose. Was he really lonely enough that he was sitting in bed fantasizing about domestic bliss with his best friend?
Letting out a breath, he picked up the phone.
***
As light from the window filtered into the bedroom, Chris felt himself start to drift awake. The muscles in his back were still sore from yesterday’s shoot, and he had to hit the bathroom. Groaning at the idea of hauling his ass out of bed so early on his day off, he ignored his bladder and rolled over, eyes still closed, to throw his arm around Steve…
Or Steve’s side of the bed, anyway. He opened his eyes and blinked at Steve’s empty pillow several times, letting lucidity start to trickle back into his brain.
Of course Steve wasn’t in bed this morning. He’d had to leave early for the airport to catch a morning flight. It stung a little, though, that Steve hadn’t woke him up to say goodbye. Or maybe he had, but Chris had been too out of it with exhaustion to remember.
Either way, Chris was alone again in a bed too big for one person. Even though he and Steve had been together for a while now, they slept alone most of the time-not by choice, but by necessity. When Leverage was filming, Steve tried to make it to Portland as often as he could. Both of their schedules were so hectic, though, that they had to struggle to have any alone time together. And when they did manage to eke out a little time, one of them was bound to be too tired to do anything more than collapse into bed and fall asleep.
It was getting old.
Chris snatched his cell off the nightstand, and punched up Steve’s number. “Hey,” he said when Steve answered. “You still waiting to get on the plane?”
“Yeah,” Steve said, fatigue tingeing his voice. “We’re boarding in about ten minutes. Supposedly.”
Sitting up in bed, Chris tried to twist the kinks out of his back. “Why didn’t you wake me up, dumbass? I could have made you breakfast.”
“’Cause you need the sleep. You were pretty beat last night.”
“I can sleep anytime. I barely get to see you.”
“You were exhausted, Chris.”
“Well, I’m wide awake now,” he said with mock enthusiasm. “Do you… do you have to take this flight? Maybe you fly out tomorrow?”
Steve was quiet for moment. “I can’t, and you know that. I have responsibilities, too. Hey, listen. I gotta go. We’re boarding.”
“It hasn’t been ten minutes,” Chris said. He winced at how needy he sounded.
“We’re boarding,” Steve said firmly. “Gotta go. Love you.”
“Yeah,” Chris said. “Love you, too.”
He tossed the phone onto the nightstand and slumped back in bed, trying to ignore the pain in his bladder and the emptiness in his heart.
***
When Chris woke up, he avoided letting his gaze fall on what used to be Steve’s side of the bed. He knew it would be empty, and he couldn’t bear to face that just yet.
The decision had been made the previous evening after a lot of yelling and a few tears. Chris blamed himself for the end of their relationship. He figured he should’ve tried a little harder to make it work, or at least stopped Steve from walking out the door.
But he hadn’t, and Steve had packed his bags and headed out into the night. Chris wasn’t even sure where he was this morning. A hotel, he supposed.
Chris swallowed and tried to remember the band’s upcoming schedule. With shooting done on the show, he’d been looking forward to the playing some dates with the boys. Now…
Before Steve had left, he had assured Chris that the band wouldn’t suffer. He’d said they could both be professional about this. Screw that, Chris thought. The last thing he wanted to think about right now was being professional. He wanted to drive to wherever Steve was and scream and yell and beg him back. He scooped up his cell and gazed at it, wondering if he should give Steve some time to cool off or if he should call and ask what he did wrong and what he needed to fix to get him to come home.
The truth was that Chris wasn’t even sure why it had all fallen apart. Nothing Steve had said really seemed to provide enough of a justification to end a relationship that they both needed. Steve had assured him there was no one else, and that he did love him. Love hadn’t been enough, apparently. “It’ll be so much easier this way,” Steve had told him. “The pressure’s off now. And we still have our friendship.”
With a strangled yell, Chris picked up Steve’s pillow and chucked it across the room as hard as he could. This was why he didn’t like to open himself up to relationships. He wasn’t cut out for to love another person like that, and this was further proof.
This time, though, he worried he might have wrecked a friendship and let his own heart be broken in ways that it couldn’t be repaired.
With a heavy sigh, Chris tossed the phone onto the space where Steve should be. He blinked back the tears. Whether he liked it or not, it looked like he was going to have to get used to waking up to an empty bed again. Maybe he’d at least get a couple of good songs out of this. The country music crowd loved a good breakup.
Master Fic List
***
Author: sheryden
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1413
Fandom: Kane RPS
Pairings: Chris/Steve
Warnings None
Disclaimer: I do not own these people, and the story within is just the fruit of my vivid imagination.
Summary: It broke Chris’s heart to wake up to an empty bed.
Notes 1: When I started this, I pictured a nice, wistful piece about the guys not finding time to spend together. Then it turned into this. I think I blame that clip of Chris talking about why he wrote "A Different Kind of Knight." I’ll make them happy in the next story. Honest. :) Written for angst_bingo for the Wild Card prompt “waking up in bed alone.”
Chris sat up in bed, savagely rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. He glanced at the empty expanse of sheets and blankets next to him. It had been a long time since he’d woken up with a warm body beside him, and as he stared at the emptiness, he had to bite back the feelings of longing that had been nipping at his heart lately. Sure, he had sexual encounters. But usually, they happened somewhere other than his place, and he left right after-or at least before morning.
He told himself he couldn’t afford long-term emotional attachments. He wasn’t good relationship material by any means, and he knew that. He was always on the move, always working toward the next rung on the ladder. He was used to having his own space and his own routine. And according to at least one of his former lovers, he was impossible to live with, and he drank too much.
Still, there was a part of Chris that wanted something more than a casual roll in the hay. He wanted to wake up next to someone who loved him, and he wanted to have an outlet for all hearts and flowers emotions he kept bottled up inside.
As he sat there lost in thought, his mind drifted to Steve, of all places. Steve. His friend. His partner. His bandmate. They’d screwed around a little over the years, usually when they were both drunk and lonely. But they’d never made more of it than it was. They were friends, and sometimes they got physical. And afterward, one of them always got up and left, even if it was just to stagger out and collapse on the couch or head two doors down to a separate hotel room.
Still, Chris couldn’t pretend he’d never wondered what it would be like to wake up next to Steve. Steve had stuck with him longer than any of his romantic partners had, and he understood Chris and accepted him the way he was. As he gazed at the vacant sheets and pillow, it occurred to Chris that it might not be all that hard to just shift their relationship a little, make the move from friendship to something more.
They already got together on a regular basis to hang out or eat meals together-one of them often cooked for the other. That sounded like a date to Chris. They talked to each other about their problems. They’d driven each other to the ER, brought each other chicken soup to help fight off colds, bought each other presents. They’d met each other’s parents, and they even lived in the same house part of the year. Shit, they were practically married already.
It would be so easy to redefine things just a little, and it could be so good for both of them.
Chris pinched the bridge of his nose. Was he really lonely enough that he was sitting in bed fantasizing about domestic bliss with his best friend?
Letting out a breath, he picked up the phone.
***
As light from the window filtered into the bedroom, Chris felt himself start to drift awake. The muscles in his back were still sore from yesterday’s shoot, and he had to hit the bathroom. Groaning at the idea of hauling his ass out of bed so early on his day off, he ignored his bladder and rolled over, eyes still closed, to throw his arm around Steve…
Or Steve’s side of the bed, anyway. He opened his eyes and blinked at Steve’s empty pillow several times, letting lucidity start to trickle back into his brain.
Of course Steve wasn’t in bed this morning. He’d had to leave early for the airport to catch a morning flight. It stung a little, though, that Steve hadn’t woke him up to say goodbye. Or maybe he had, but Chris had been too out of it with exhaustion to remember.
Either way, Chris was alone again in a bed too big for one person. Even though he and Steve had been together for a while now, they slept alone most of the time-not by choice, but by necessity. When Leverage was filming, Steve tried to make it to Portland as often as he could. Both of their schedules were so hectic, though, that they had to struggle to have any alone time together. And when they did manage to eke out a little time, one of them was bound to be too tired to do anything more than collapse into bed and fall asleep.
It was getting old.
Chris snatched his cell off the nightstand, and punched up Steve’s number. “Hey,” he said when Steve answered. “You still waiting to get on the plane?”
“Yeah,” Steve said, fatigue tingeing his voice. “We’re boarding in about ten minutes. Supposedly.”
Sitting up in bed, Chris tried to twist the kinks out of his back. “Why didn’t you wake me up, dumbass? I could have made you breakfast.”
“’Cause you need the sleep. You were pretty beat last night.”
“I can sleep anytime. I barely get to see you.”
“You were exhausted, Chris.”
“Well, I’m wide awake now,” he said with mock enthusiasm. “Do you… do you have to take this flight? Maybe you fly out tomorrow?”
Steve was quiet for moment. “I can’t, and you know that. I have responsibilities, too. Hey, listen. I gotta go. We’re boarding.”
“It hasn’t been ten minutes,” Chris said. He winced at how needy he sounded.
“We’re boarding,” Steve said firmly. “Gotta go. Love you.”
“Yeah,” Chris said. “Love you, too.”
He tossed the phone onto the nightstand and slumped back in bed, trying to ignore the pain in his bladder and the emptiness in his heart.
***
When Chris woke up, he avoided letting his gaze fall on what used to be Steve’s side of the bed. He knew it would be empty, and he couldn’t bear to face that just yet.
The decision had been made the previous evening after a lot of yelling and a few tears. Chris blamed himself for the end of their relationship. He figured he should’ve tried a little harder to make it work, or at least stopped Steve from walking out the door.
But he hadn’t, and Steve had packed his bags and headed out into the night. Chris wasn’t even sure where he was this morning. A hotel, he supposed.
Chris swallowed and tried to remember the band’s upcoming schedule. With shooting done on the show, he’d been looking forward to the playing some dates with the boys. Now…
Before Steve had left, he had assured Chris that the band wouldn’t suffer. He’d said they could both be professional about this. Screw that, Chris thought. The last thing he wanted to think about right now was being professional. He wanted to drive to wherever Steve was and scream and yell and beg him back. He scooped up his cell and gazed at it, wondering if he should give Steve some time to cool off or if he should call and ask what he did wrong and what he needed to fix to get him to come home.
The truth was that Chris wasn’t even sure why it had all fallen apart. Nothing Steve had said really seemed to provide enough of a justification to end a relationship that they both needed. Steve had assured him there was no one else, and that he did love him. Love hadn’t been enough, apparently. “It’ll be so much easier this way,” Steve had told him. “The pressure’s off now. And we still have our friendship.”
With a strangled yell, Chris picked up Steve’s pillow and chucked it across the room as hard as he could. This was why he didn’t like to open himself up to relationships. He wasn’t cut out for to love another person like that, and this was further proof.
This time, though, he worried he might have wrecked a friendship and let his own heart be broken in ways that it couldn’t be repaired.
With a heavy sigh, Chris tossed the phone onto the space where Steve should be. He blinked back the tears. Whether he liked it or not, it looked like he was going to have to get used to waking up to an empty bed again. Maybe he’d at least get a couple of good songs out of this. The country music crowd loved a good breakup.
Master Fic List
***