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And now for something completely different... anonymous December 10 2010, 21:33:10 UTC
Your favorite recipe, as re-written by Sherlock.

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Tandoori Chicken with wild Basmati Rice anonymous December 10 2010, 21:47:37 UTC
First, ignore the recipe. It is merely a concatenation of codified errors. Also there was no canned cream of mushroom soup readily available in India before the 20th century so it's hardly 'traditional'.

Second, put the saucepan down.

Third, ring up the curry place around the corner. Wait twenty minutes and serve.

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Re: Tandoori Chicken with wild Basmati Rice anonymous December 10 2010, 21:50:16 UTC
concatenation

Wow, good word :)

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Re: Tandoori Chicken with wild Basmati Rice anonymous December 10 2010, 21:51:36 UTC
Thanks, it's one of my favourites. :D

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Re: Tandoori Chicken with wild Basmati Rice anonymous January 4 2011, 03:44:30 UTC
Yes.

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Re: Tandoori Chicken with wild Basmati Rice anonymous January 4 2011, 23:40:32 UTC
If I had the money, this would be my recipe for everything.

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Salsa anonymous December 11 2010, 04:43:46 UTC
1/2 onion
3 2 1 serrano pepper
28 oz. can of tomatoes (Note to self: Tomato paste =/= diced tomatoes)
1 bunch of cilantro what the hell is cilantro? --ah, coriander, why didn't they just put that?
1/2 green bell pepper

1. Dice the onion.
2. Dice the bell pepper.
3. Dice the serrano.
4. Remember not to touch eyes after touching the serrano pepper.
5. Oh, god, it burns!
6. Never mind, have John dice the serrano from now on.
7. Pour out the juice from the can of tomatoes.
8. Pour it into a bowl, never mind.
9. Send John to Mrs Hudson for new can of tomatoes
10. Try again.
11. Pour tomatoes, onion, bell pepper, and serrano into a food processor.
12. Do we own a food processor?
13. Send John to buy food processor.
14. Blend it, then pour it into bowl with tomato juice.
15. Add coriander leaves, salt, and pepper to taste.
16. Serve to unsuspecting flatmate.

I love this salsa, but I usually use 3-4 Serrano peppers, which is a bit.... excessive to many. If your nose isn't running and your eyes aren't watering, it doesn't count as salsa ( ... )

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Re: Salsa anonymous December 11 2010, 05:08:37 UTC
hahahahaha.

Ahem.

I would love to taste your salsa, anon. Nobody ever makes it spicy enough where I am :\

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Re: Salsa anonymous December 11 2010, 05:15:28 UTC
I forgot the garlic!

afjkdslafj My brother's roommate is from Wisconsin, so I toned it down to 2 serrano peppers... He still thought it was too spicy. :||

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OP - Re: Salsa anonymous December 11 2010, 06:34:39 UTC
*rofl* Fantastic! That food processor is going to have a very interesting life at 221B!

I'd love to try your salsa too, the hotter the better. I eat jalapenos as though they were chips. :D Do you leave the seeds in the serrano peppers or take them out before dicing?

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Re: OP - Re: Salsa anonymous December 11 2010, 06:42:39 UTC
Thank you! Couldn't resist. It was either that or my homemade Irish cream...

(Dear goodness, can you imagine? "Sherlock!" "Yes, John?" "What did I say about the food processor?" "... no more sheep's brains in it?" "Exactly. And especially no sheep's brains WITHOUT THE LID ON. We'll never get that off the ceiling. Mrs Hudson's going to kill us.")

Leave them in, of course! Can never be too spicy!

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Re: OP - Re: Salsa anonymous December 11 2010, 07:11:56 UTC
Oh, also, if you give it a go, I forgot to add that you throw in some cloves of garlic. Usually about 3/4 depending on your taste. It's a pretty forgiving recipe.

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Re: OP - Re: Salsa anonymous December 11 2010, 07:18:57 UTC
Fantastic! I'll have to round up a food processor myself before trying it, but I've saved the recipe :D

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Re: Salsa invisibleorchid April 25 2012, 08:21:22 UTC
Canned tomatoes and bell peppers! This is blasphemy!!!!!

asfdgh

(It bugs me when I see coriander instead of cilantro, Sherlock. I know how you feel.)

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Herby eggs! THE STUDENT FOOD OF KINGS anonymous December 11 2010, 14:58:09 UTC
Ingredients:
Eggs
Garlic paste
Basil
Rosemary
Thyme

1. Check recipe for ingredients
2. Hunt for any information about how many eggs are being used
3. Curse the lazy student who posted this recipe online without proper instructions
4. Decide that an entire box is probably enough
5. Melt some butter in a frying pan while breaking eggs
6. Drop entire eggshell into mixing bowl
7. Spend four minutes fishing out eggshell bits
8. Add herbs and garlic, praising the glory of pre-pasted garlic
9. Extinguish frying pan fire
10. Pour mixture onto frying pan
11. Cook like an omelette
12. Get fed up of omelette cooking time and scramble the eggs instead
13. Note how very similar in colour and texture it is to the experiment involving liquefied brain matter
14. Mention this whilst serving to flatmate
15. Explain that it isn't your fault he was sick, and thus it should not be your job to clean it up
16 Enjoy!

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Re: Herby eggs! THE STUDENT FOOD OF KINGS anonymous December 11 2010, 20:10:53 UTC
HAHAHA! Perfect! XD

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