Don't we all want it?
anonymous
December 8 2010, 18:47:15 UTC
Okay, so there were prompts, where Sherlock and Watson were from YOUR city or where Sherlock had YOUR job. But what if Sherlock had YOU as a flatmate? Would you run scared of heads in the fridge and liver in the oven, or would he freak out of his scarf seeing you eat brain strew (yup, some people like it even in civilized countries)? Would you compete in making coplete mess? Would he take you on the cases? C'mon, just run with it.
Re: Don't we all want it?
anonymous
December 8 2010, 19:03:41 UTC
Oh, dear god. We would either drive each other nuts or be perfect for each other--a lesbian bipolar and a self-proclaimed (probably) asexual sociopath who solves murders living together in perfect harmony.
... Now there's a sitcom waiting to happen. Or a 1990's afternoon special.
Re: Don't we all want it? shrewreaderDecember 11 2010, 00:49:23 UTC
'Shrew.' 'Sherlock.' 'Why is there a 2nd fridge in the kitchen?' 'Yours has a thermal spike on the 2nd shelf.' 'It does?' 'Yes. I put the pot du creme there to chill last week and it was still chocolate soup. Which you used as a control for the business with the fruit flies. How did that work out?' 'They all died.' 'Isn't that what they were supposed to do?' 'Well. Yes.' 'Right, so, anyway, you need a reliable fridge, I need a reliable fridge, and Mrs Hudson's not loaning hers out again after the business with the climate controlled documents and thumbs. So. New fridge.' 'I see. About the documents....' 'Tell your brother if he wants acts that incur the wrath of the Kew archivists, he can pay us more money for me to spy on you. Also, what are we telling him was for tea?' 'I don't know. What's for tea?' 'Human kibble, I think. Are there any Crispies?' ''Fraid not. Used them for a catalyst.' 'Millenium hand and shrimp. Oooh. Shrimp. Where's the take-out menu?' 'Under the skull.' 'Usual for you?' 'Yes, please.' 'Great. Pass the thumb
Re: Sort of Fill
anonymous
December 8 2010, 20:38:55 UTC
Well, I might take your offer, after my flatmate goes into whe kitchen and sees results of my attepts in making a cake... :P I mean, it can sometimes happen, that the chocolate filling is all over the ceiling, right? With hanging (glued to it) nuts? ...
Re: Don't we all want it? captainswayDecember 8 2010, 20:02:19 UTC
Lol, I would just keep to myself for a while, until he put body parts in the fridge. Then I would wonder what the hell they were for. I'd like to think he could teach me a thing or two about chemistry and I would ask him how to go about creating the zombie virus I want to make. :'D
We'd probably grate over two strong personalities living together though. Dx
yeah I wanted in on this too
anonymous
December 8 2010, 20:10:00 UTC
Oh Jesus, it would be insane. I am absolutely batty. Flatmates avoid me on principle.
"When did you last eat, little cheese puff?"
"Three da- did you just call me cheese puff?"
"No."
"I think you'll find you did."
"Lalalalala I don't care what you think, I'm making a rainbow cake and you can't have any."
"I wouldn't want any."
"You're going to eat it whether you like it or n- was that hand always in there?"
"Yes. You are aware that your sentences have no logical consistency?"
"Pfft logic is so lame. I did this module on logic once and I just listened to music and drew doodles about Plato being a platypus. Look, I have a handy handy hand!"
"I would appreciate it if you left my experiments alone. That hand is-"
"LOOK I AM POKING YOU WITH YOUR HAND!"
"...if I killed you, nobody would ever find the body."
"OOOH that's so cool, how would you do it? The icicle thing? Chop me up and throw me in the Thames? Get your scary brother to disappear me? YOU MUST TELL ME SO I CAN WRITE IT."
‘So why’d you have such trouble finding a flatmate?’
‘I’ve occasionally been known to put body parts in the fridge. But I’m sure you can put up with that if I can put up with your alcoholism.’
‘…excuse me?’
‘Your phone. There’s scratches around the charger slot. Every night you put it on to charge; you’re drunk and you miss the slot. Never see scratches like that on a sober person’s phone, never see a drunk’s without them...why are you laughing?’
‘I’m not an alcoholic - well, I say that, but there’s enough of them in my family that I’m basically genetically doomed and I’m also a uni student with everything that entails, but the scratches round the charger are down to the fact that I’m dyspraxic and have all the coordination of a gnat
( ... )
aaand then obviously what would happen is
anonymous
December 8 2010, 21:24:44 UTC
DAY TWO
‘I am never taking you to a crime scene again.’
‘I did tell you my coordination wasn’t very good.’
‘I just don’t understand how you managed to land on top of all the evidence when you were standing at the other side of the room.’
‘I have a gift.’
‘Mind you, it was almost worth it to see the look on Anderson’s face when you said that thing about the dinosaurs, though. How did you know? I didn’t know.’
‘…you know, it’s kind of a long story. Maybe it’s better if I just show you.’
DAY TWO (ten minutes later)
‘WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS PLACE THESE PEOPLE ARE DEPRAVED JOHN AND I CERTAINLY NEVER DID THAT WHAT KIND OF SICK TWISTED PERSON ARE YOU GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE'
But what if Sherlock had YOU as a flatmate? Would you run scared of heads in the fridge and liver in the oven, or would he freak out of his scarf seeing you eat brain strew (yup, some people like it even in civilized countries)? Would you compete in making coplete mess? Would he take you on the cases? C'mon, just run with it.
Reply
... Now there's a sitcom waiting to happen. Or a 1990's afternoon special.
Reply
'Sherlock.'
'Why is there a 2nd fridge in the kitchen?'
'Yours has a thermal spike on the 2nd shelf.'
'It does?'
'Yes. I put the pot du creme there to chill last week and it was still chocolate soup. Which you used as a control for the business with the fruit flies. How did that work out?'
'They all died.'
'Isn't that what they were supposed to do?'
'Well. Yes.'
'Right, so, anyway, you need a reliable fridge, I need a reliable fridge, and Mrs Hudson's not loaning hers out again after the business with the climate controlled documents and thumbs. So. New fridge.'
'I see. About the documents....'
'Tell your brother if he wants acts that incur the wrath of the Kew archivists, he can pay us more money for me to spy on you. Also, what are we telling him was for tea?'
'I don't know. What's for tea?'
'Human kibble, I think. Are there any Crispies?'
''Fraid not. Used them for a catalyst.'
'Millenium hand and shrimp. Oooh. Shrimp. Where's the take-out menu?'
'Under the skull.'
'Usual for you?'
'Yes, please.'
'Great. Pass the thumb
Reply
...Yeah, he'd kick me out on the street by nightfall. ;)
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We'd probably grate over two strong personalities living together though. Dx
Reply
"When did you last eat, little cheese puff?"
"Three da- did you just call me cheese puff?"
"No."
"I think you'll find you did."
"Lalalalala I don't care what you think, I'm making a rainbow cake and you can't have any."
"I wouldn't want any."
"You're going to eat it whether you like it or n- was that hand always in there?"
"Yes. You are aware that your sentences have no logical consistency?"
"Pfft logic is so lame. I did this module on logic once and I just listened to music and drew doodles about Plato being a platypus. Look, I have a handy handy hand!"
"I would appreciate it if you left my experiments alone. That hand is-"
"LOOK I AM POKING YOU WITH YOUR HAND!"
"...if I killed you, nobody would ever find the body."
"OOOH that's so cool, how would you do it? The icicle thing? Chop me up and throw me in the Thames? Get your scary brother to disappear me? YOU MUST TELL ME SO I CAN WRITE IT."
"Oh dear God, and people think I'm annoying."
Reply
‘I’ve occasionally been known to put body parts in the fridge. But I’m sure you can put up with that if I can put up with your alcoholism.’
‘…excuse me?’
‘Your phone. There’s scratches around the charger slot. Every night you put it on to charge; you’re drunk and you miss the slot. Never see scratches like that on a sober person’s phone, never see a drunk’s without them...why are you laughing?’
‘I’m not an alcoholic - well, I say that, but there’s enough of them in my family that I’m basically genetically doomed and I’m also a uni student with everything that entails, but the scratches round the charger are down to the fact that I’m dyspraxic and have all the coordination of a gnat ( ... )
Reply
‘I am never taking you to a crime scene again.’
‘I did tell you my coordination wasn’t very good.’
‘I just don’t understand how you managed to land on top of all the evidence when you were standing at the other side of the room.’
‘I have a gift.’
‘Mind you, it was almost worth it to see the look on Anderson’s face when you said that thing about the dinosaurs, though. How did you know? I didn’t know.’
‘…you know, it’s kind of a long story. Maybe it’s better if I just show you.’
DAY TWO (ten minutes later)
‘WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS PLACE THESE PEOPLE ARE DEPRAVED JOHN AND I CERTAINLY NEVER DID THAT WHAT KIND OF SICK TWISTED PERSON ARE YOU GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE'
the end.
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