DBSK Fic: The Mark of Lost Images (One Shot)
Title: The Mark of Lost Images
Main pairing: broken!Reita x Jaejoong
Other pairings: ninja!Yoochun x Junsu x Jaejoong
Genre: Angst
Rating: PG
Warnings: boy x boy relationship
Disclaimer: I do not own any of them
Summary: Written for rocker x Jaejoong challenge in joeun_kkoom Reita could only watch as Jaejoong grew into someone he didn't know anymore.
Author’s Note: Won first place! 8DDD Thank you very much cerinityks and be_ddelusionall for hosting the contest!
---
The Mark of Lost Images
By: Sharl
He had changed his image. They all had.
Reita watched as three young men walked through the double door, the whole room fell silent as they entered. After all, who hadn’t heard of them? JYJ had won their lawsuit with Avex Entertainment, and in just few days they will have their second Tokyo Dome Concert. Some people thought that it was a mocking gesture towards Avex, or a regular concert to reconfirm their popularity in Japan, but some others -like Reita- knew better. It was the mark of a new beginning, a perfect starting point of something new.
He remembered the first time he met them, there were five of them back then. Five young men who thought they could make it big in Japan, breaking that infamous wall that separated Japan between the rests of Asian countries. Naïve, cute, hardworking. Those were the images they aimed for. Their hard works paid off; after two years they became the most successful boy group in Japan, even surpassing the Japanese boy bands. And then one of the most famous lawsuits in Asian Entertainment Industry happened and the five broke up into three and two.
Maybe it was because they were no longer with SM Entertainment; while the duo stayed with what had been portrayed for them, the three chose to rebuild their images from scratch, breaking out from the naïve, cute illustrations. Yoochun, now an inspiring actor, had a suave, gentleman image. Junsu tried a new ‘Death’ theme during his album last year. And lastly, Jaejoong opted for a rocker image in his new mini-album. No one really knew why, but Reita does. It was a bet between him and Jaejoong few years ago, and apparently Jaejoong finally won.
Reita stepped out into the balcony, and in that movement he knew he had caught the three Korean men’s attention. If he played his cards right, Jaejoong would go after him, preferably alone without his bandmates. He leaned back on the railing and took a cigarette out. Mild Seven Lights. The same brand Jaejoong liked to smoke. Does he still smoke now? He wondered and immediately scoffed. What do you care?
He didn’t have to wait long, or maybe he was too lost in thought, but soon the door behind him opened and a voice so shockingly familiar asked. “What are you doing out here alone?”
The Japanese smiled. Bingo. He turned around to see Kim Jaejoong there, looking as beautiful as ever with two champagne glasses in hand. “Smoking,” Reita stated the obvious, waving the cigarette a bit. “Want one?” He took out his cigarette box and offered it.
Jaejoong shook his head. “Thanks, but I’ve quit since eight months ago.”
“Really?”
“Yes,” the Korean nodded. “It’s bad for my voice.”
But Reita was nothing if not stubborn. All his bandmates called him ‘idiot donkey’ for a reason. And so he tried to persuade the man in front of him again, at least for one last time, maybe because somehow it really hurt knowing this man had changed so much. “Are you sure?” he jiggled the box slightly, even going as far as putting his lighter on top of it.
Jaejoong eyed the cigarette box and looked away, tiny smile curved his lips upward. “Don’t tempt me. Please.”
Reita felt like the other wasn’t just speaking about cigarettes. Still he finally relented, putting the cigarette box and the lighter back in his jacket pocket, shrugging as he replied, “Suit yourself.” He took a long drag of his own cigarette, making a show as he did so. He looked at the Tokyo night skyline again, watching disinterestedly at the city view he had seen countless times from his own apartment. It was the same view over and over again.
“Here,” Jaejoong offered him one of the champagne glasses. “I thought you might get thirsty.”
He stared at the clear sparkling wine before looking up to face the Korean challengingly. “What happened to our usual beer tradition?”
“They don’t have it here.”
“So let’s go look for some. My bike is parked downstairs,” Reita offered. His instinct as visual Kei J-rock star kicked in at that moment. Eyes glinted with sinful promises of lust, face contorted in arrogance and sexy look, his whole body posture relaxed invitingly, and the most important thing: rebellious aura. His fans would be screaming by now if they were here.
Jaejoong was immune to it though, having seen it too many times with or without the makeup, on stage or off stage, in a bright lit room or dark corner as he was fucked senseless time and time again. “A Harley is not built for two persons riding on it,” he instead chose to reply.
Reita took a step closer. “That’s why you have to sit really close to me, so that we can fit together in really tight places,” he whispered in Jaejoong’s ear, “We’ve done this before. What makes you think we can’t do it one more time?”
Jaejoong looked at him with unreadable eyes. The Korean wasn’t a fool, he realized what Reita was implying, and asking for now.
“Come on, baby.” There, Reita said that, his trademark line. Jaejoong suppressed a shudder, praying to whatever god he declined to believe in that hopefully Reita won’t notice. He refused to let the man know that even after two years of not seeing each other he could still make Jaejoong crumble like a desperate man with mere few sultry smiles and husky tones. Pathetic, thankfully his brain was still able to function rationally before he said anything he would surely regret later.
The older man watched Jaejoong intently, waiting for any signs, any hints that he was getting through him. But all he could see was a cold façade and when Jaejoong looked at him, those big eyes were carefully guarded so that he couldn’t read into them like he used to be able to.
“I need to get back in there, Junsu and Yoochun will be worried,” Jaejoong said. He placed one of the champagne glasses on the railings, “In case you changed your mind.”
Reita grabbed the other’s arm quickly. “That album is your bet to me. It proves that you’re still thinking about me. About us.” He sounded like a desperate school girl now, he realized that, but he couldn’t care less. Not when he was about to lose his chance with this man again. Jaejoong was his ideal type, feminine and even more mature now that he was older. Reita had lost him once, he wasn’t about to lose him again. “I haven’t forgotten you know, our bet.”
It was their secret joke back then; Reita was betting that Jaejoong would never be able to put on such heavy J-rock image. Ever. And Jaejoong had insisted that one day he’ll release an album with rock theme. Apparently that day had come and Jaejoong had won their bet.
The Japanese mentioned the bet with a hope that it might trigger some reaction from the other. It did though, however it was not the reaction he was hoping for. He watched helplessly as Jaejoong’s face turned colder, eyes started to glint with angry flame. His voice was pure disgust as he spoke, “You never listen to my album.”
Reita looked away. “I heard parts of it.”
“But you don’t know what the song’s about? You don’t even bother to know, do you?” Jaejoong tore his arm away from Reita’s grip. “I suggest that you look for the lyrics, you’ll know what I mean. Yes the album is my bet to you, but it also how I want things are going to be. We can’t be an ‘us’ anymore.”
“Hyung?” Junsu’s voice broke any argument Reita might have said. Turning around, he saw Yoochun and Junsu stood in the doorway, faces laden with worry and it turned into hatred as they looked at Reita. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” Jaejoong replied, walking closer to where his bandmates were. Reita watched as those tense shoulders relaxed visibly once Junsu placed a comforting hand on Jaejoong’s arm while Yoochun chose to glare at the Japanese, a warning look in his eyes. He knew he had lost the man forever when he saw Jaejoong smiled tenderly at his two friends -or was it boyfriends now? - and there was nothing he could do to get him back.
“Let’s go back inside,” this time Yoochun was the one who spoke, “The manager is looking for you.”
“You go on ahead, I’ll be there soon. One minute,” he added, raising his index finger and smiled as Junsu frowned disapprovingly. “I’ll be right behind you,” Jaejoong promised. Junsu still looked slightly worried though so he turned to Yoochun for help. “One minute, Chun, please.”
Yoochun sighed. “Fine, we’ll come out again if you don’t show up in one minute.”
“But Chunnie-“
“Trust him, Su. He never backs away from his words now, does he?” Yoochun cut off Junsu’s protest by saying Jaejoong’s strength. Or maybe to spite on Reita’s mistakes, Reita didn’t know. Either way, it seemed to have worked as Junsu tightly nodded and stepped back inside. Yoochun stopped by the door.
“One minute, Jae.”
Jaejoong nodded and said, “Pinky promise.” It must have been some sort of jokes between the two because Yoochun suddenly laughed out loud, shaking his head as he stepped inside. By the time the door was closing, Jaejoong had turned around and faced Reita.
“Are they the reason why there can’t be an ‘us’?” the Japanese couldn’t help but asked.
“You saw how I’m with them Reita,” Jaejoong said his name for the first time that night, and maybe for the last time, “I’m happy now.”
Weren’t you before when you’re with me? Was what Reita wanted to ask. The words were on the tip of his tongue, but although he was stubborn, he knew a lost battle when he saw one. And this was not something he could win. He had played the game, and lost.
He didn’t need to look up Jaejoong’s lyrics to know what they were about.
Reita took the champagne glass on the railing and raised it in salute. “Congratulations Jaejoong, you won the bet,” he toasted. Drinking the wine, he bit back a grimace at the alien taste, wishing that he was drinking beer instead. He finished the drink in one go and put it back on the railing once he was done. He nodded towards the door. “You should go back inside before they’re beating the crap out of me,” he jokingly said.
Jaejoong laughed and Reita’s heart clenched hearing the beautiful sound, knowing that it would be a long time before he can hear it again. “I really think it’s for the best.” He was referring to stepping inside or about their relationship, Reita didn’t know. He doesn’t want to know. He watched as Jaejoong gave him one last smile and stepping inside. The door closed with a click.
Reita sighed. Turning around to look at the night city view again, he whispered, “I love you.” Surely he was permitted to say that one last time. Even though there was no one to hear it.
-End Story-
Main pairing: broken!Reita x Jaejoong
Other pairings: ninja!Yoochun x Junsu x Jaejoong
Genre: Angst
Rating: PG
Warnings: boy x boy relationship
Disclaimer: I do not own any of them
Summary: Written for rocker x Jaejoong challenge in joeun_kkoom Reita could only watch as Jaejoong grew into someone he didn't know anymore.
Author’s Note: Won first place! 8DDD Thank you very much cerinityks and be_ddelusionall for hosting the contest!
---
The Mark of Lost Images
By: Sharl
He had changed his image. They all had.
Reita watched as three young men walked through the double door, the whole room fell silent as they entered. After all, who hadn’t heard of them? JYJ had won their lawsuit with Avex Entertainment, and in just few days they will have their second Tokyo Dome Concert. Some people thought that it was a mocking gesture towards Avex, or a regular concert to reconfirm their popularity in Japan, but some others -like Reita- knew better. It was the mark of a new beginning, a perfect starting point of something new.
He remembered the first time he met them, there were five of them back then. Five young men who thought they could make it big in Japan, breaking that infamous wall that separated Japan between the rests of Asian countries. Naïve, cute, hardworking. Those were the images they aimed for. Their hard works paid off; after two years they became the most successful boy group in Japan, even surpassing the Japanese boy bands. And then one of the most famous lawsuits in Asian Entertainment Industry happened and the five broke up into three and two.
Maybe it was because they were no longer with SM Entertainment; while the duo stayed with what had been portrayed for them, the three chose to rebuild their images from scratch, breaking out from the naïve, cute illustrations. Yoochun, now an inspiring actor, had a suave, gentleman image. Junsu tried a new ‘Death’ theme during his album last year. And lastly, Jaejoong opted for a rocker image in his new mini-album. No one really knew why, but Reita does. It was a bet between him and Jaejoong few years ago, and apparently Jaejoong finally won.
Reita stepped out into the balcony, and in that movement he knew he had caught the three Korean men’s attention. If he played his cards right, Jaejoong would go after him, preferably alone without his bandmates. He leaned back on the railing and took a cigarette out. Mild Seven Lights. The same brand Jaejoong liked to smoke. Does he still smoke now? He wondered and immediately scoffed. What do you care?
He didn’t have to wait long, or maybe he was too lost in thought, but soon the door behind him opened and a voice so shockingly familiar asked. “What are you doing out here alone?”
The Japanese smiled. Bingo. He turned around to see Kim Jaejoong there, looking as beautiful as ever with two champagne glasses in hand. “Smoking,” Reita stated the obvious, waving the cigarette a bit. “Want one?” He took out his cigarette box and offered it.
Jaejoong shook his head. “Thanks, but I’ve quit since eight months ago.”
“Really?”
“Yes,” the Korean nodded. “It’s bad for my voice.”
But Reita was nothing if not stubborn. All his bandmates called him ‘idiot donkey’ for a reason. And so he tried to persuade the man in front of him again, at least for one last time, maybe because somehow it really hurt knowing this man had changed so much. “Are you sure?” he jiggled the box slightly, even going as far as putting his lighter on top of it.
Jaejoong eyed the cigarette box and looked away, tiny smile curved his lips upward. “Don’t tempt me. Please.”
Reita felt like the other wasn’t just speaking about cigarettes. Still he finally relented, putting the cigarette box and the lighter back in his jacket pocket, shrugging as he replied, “Suit yourself.” He took a long drag of his own cigarette, making a show as he did so. He looked at the Tokyo night skyline again, watching disinterestedly at the city view he had seen countless times from his own apartment. It was the same view over and over again.
“Here,” Jaejoong offered him one of the champagne glasses. “I thought you might get thirsty.”
He stared at the clear sparkling wine before looking up to face the Korean challengingly. “What happened to our usual beer tradition?”
“They don’t have it here.”
“So let’s go look for some. My bike is parked downstairs,” Reita offered. His instinct as visual Kei J-rock star kicked in at that moment. Eyes glinted with sinful promises of lust, face contorted in arrogance and sexy look, his whole body posture relaxed invitingly, and the most important thing: rebellious aura. His fans would be screaming by now if they were here.
Jaejoong was immune to it though, having seen it too many times with or without the makeup, on stage or off stage, in a bright lit room or dark corner as he was fucked senseless time and time again. “A Harley is not built for two persons riding on it,” he instead chose to reply.
Reita took a step closer. “That’s why you have to sit really close to me, so that we can fit together in really tight places,” he whispered in Jaejoong’s ear, “We’ve done this before. What makes you think we can’t do it one more time?”
Jaejoong looked at him with unreadable eyes. The Korean wasn’t a fool, he realized what Reita was implying, and asking for now.
“Come on, baby.” There, Reita said that, his trademark line. Jaejoong suppressed a shudder, praying to whatever god he declined to believe in that hopefully Reita won’t notice. He refused to let the man know that even after two years of not seeing each other he could still make Jaejoong crumble like a desperate man with mere few sultry smiles and husky tones. Pathetic, thankfully his brain was still able to function rationally before he said anything he would surely regret later.
The older man watched Jaejoong intently, waiting for any signs, any hints that he was getting through him. But all he could see was a cold façade and when Jaejoong looked at him, those big eyes were carefully guarded so that he couldn’t read into them like he used to be able to.
“I need to get back in there, Junsu and Yoochun will be worried,” Jaejoong said. He placed one of the champagne glasses on the railings, “In case you changed your mind.”
Reita grabbed the other’s arm quickly. “That album is your bet to me. It proves that you’re still thinking about me. About us.” He sounded like a desperate school girl now, he realized that, but he couldn’t care less. Not when he was about to lose his chance with this man again. Jaejoong was his ideal type, feminine and even more mature now that he was older. Reita had lost him once, he wasn’t about to lose him again. “I haven’t forgotten you know, our bet.”
It was their secret joke back then; Reita was betting that Jaejoong would never be able to put on such heavy J-rock image. Ever. And Jaejoong had insisted that one day he’ll release an album with rock theme. Apparently that day had come and Jaejoong had won their bet.
The Japanese mentioned the bet with a hope that it might trigger some reaction from the other. It did though, however it was not the reaction he was hoping for. He watched helplessly as Jaejoong’s face turned colder, eyes started to glint with angry flame. His voice was pure disgust as he spoke, “You never listen to my album.”
Reita looked away. “I heard parts of it.”
“But you don’t know what the song’s about? You don’t even bother to know, do you?” Jaejoong tore his arm away from Reita’s grip. “I suggest that you look for the lyrics, you’ll know what I mean. Yes the album is my bet to you, but it also how I want things are going to be. We can’t be an ‘us’ anymore.”
“Hyung?” Junsu’s voice broke any argument Reita might have said. Turning around, he saw Yoochun and Junsu stood in the doorway, faces laden with worry and it turned into hatred as they looked at Reita. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” Jaejoong replied, walking closer to where his bandmates were. Reita watched as those tense shoulders relaxed visibly once Junsu placed a comforting hand on Jaejoong’s arm while Yoochun chose to glare at the Japanese, a warning look in his eyes. He knew he had lost the man forever when he saw Jaejoong smiled tenderly at his two friends -or was it boyfriends now? - and there was nothing he could do to get him back.
“Let’s go back inside,” this time Yoochun was the one who spoke, “The manager is looking for you.”
“You go on ahead, I’ll be there soon. One minute,” he added, raising his index finger and smiled as Junsu frowned disapprovingly. “I’ll be right behind you,” Jaejoong promised. Junsu still looked slightly worried though so he turned to Yoochun for help. “One minute, Chun, please.”
Yoochun sighed. “Fine, we’ll come out again if you don’t show up in one minute.”
“But Chunnie-“
“Trust him, Su. He never backs away from his words now, does he?” Yoochun cut off Junsu’s protest by saying Jaejoong’s strength. Or maybe to spite on Reita’s mistakes, Reita didn’t know. Either way, it seemed to have worked as Junsu tightly nodded and stepped back inside. Yoochun stopped by the door.
“One minute, Jae.”
Jaejoong nodded and said, “Pinky promise.” It must have been some sort of jokes between the two because Yoochun suddenly laughed out loud, shaking his head as he stepped inside. By the time the door was closing, Jaejoong had turned around and faced Reita.
“Are they the reason why there can’t be an ‘us’?” the Japanese couldn’t help but asked.
“You saw how I’m with them Reita,” Jaejoong said his name for the first time that night, and maybe for the last time, “I’m happy now.”
Weren’t you before when you’re with me? Was what Reita wanted to ask. The words were on the tip of his tongue, but although he was stubborn, he knew a lost battle when he saw one. And this was not something he could win. He had played the game, and lost.
He didn’t need to look up Jaejoong’s lyrics to know what they were about.
Reita took the champagne glass on the railing and raised it in salute. “Congratulations Jaejoong, you won the bet,” he toasted. Drinking the wine, he bit back a grimace at the alien taste, wishing that he was drinking beer instead. He finished the drink in one go and put it back on the railing once he was done. He nodded towards the door. “You should go back inside before they’re beating the crap out of me,” he jokingly said.
Jaejoong laughed and Reita’s heart clenched hearing the beautiful sound, knowing that it would be a long time before he can hear it again. “I really think it’s for the best.” He was referring to stepping inside or about their relationship, Reita didn’t know. He doesn’t want to know. He watched as Jaejoong gave him one last smile and stepping inside. The door closed with a click.
Reita sighed. Turning around to look at the night city view again, he whispered, “I love you.” Surely he was permitted to say that one last time. Even though there was no one to hear it.
-End Story-