The Bann's Letter (DA: O)
The Bann's Letter
The King of Ferelden receives a letter from Cyrion Tabris about his daughter, Esra, after the end of the Blight.
Fandom: Dragon Age: Origins
Rating/Warnings: G (Trigger Warnings for rape)
Notes: I recently picked up this game again and beat it with a City Elf. This is inspired by the results of that playthrough.
My most honorable King Alistair,
I write this letter in response to your request to learn more about the Grey Warden, Esra Tabris of Denerim, in light of her sacrifice. I must confess, I don’t completely understand my daughter, even in death. Esra had always been a precocious imp of a girl. She took after Adaia like that. Esra’s face morphed into her mother’s too as she grew older. Blustery hazel eyes with distinguished cheekbones, fiery red hair and rosy lips. She didn’t get any of those from me, I’ll tell you that.
But I am getting off-track here. A father can always see when another man loves his child, and you are no exception. To most I’m sure you did an admirable job of hiding your real feelings for her, but I could see it in your eyes as you bid her spirit farewell in front of the crowd at Redcliffe. Both you and that other elf...Figures, more men would want my daughter after the death of her fiancee at the hands of Bann Vaughan.
Your majesty traveled with my daughter, and are aware of what transpired that day--the real story, not the propaganda that has been spread around. Your Warden was never a soft-hearted person in her childhood, and who could blame her, having grown up in the Alienage with the rest of us? She had her friends and she always had Shianni and Soris around, but she tended to keep to herself. Always.
Esra took great pleasure in sneaking about and playing tricks on others. She always preferred speech over facing consequences. She looked after herself first, and the needs of others second. The girl had charisma and unusual skills that served well in her own survival. She could convince beggars to hand over their earnings to her if she so tried. Esra was always a clever child, perhaps even a deceitful one. Someday, however, that cleverness would go from something innocent to something else altogether.
Dear maker, nothing could have prepared me for the day she left with the Grey Wardens.
Soris and Esra came back to us, bloodied but mostly unharmed. There was no sign of Shianni or any of the other women who had been kidnapped by the Bann and his friends. Esra claimed it was because they were unable to get to them and Soris didn't make any arguments against her word. Later, when Shianni returned, I could tell already that she had terrible news to share with me.
Esra Tabris, my own daughter, sold out her cousin to that despicable man. Accepted a damned bribe and everything, all so she could escape unscathed and save her own skin. She betrayed not just the Alienage, but her cousin, her own flesh and blood. Was it too much to assume that my daughter would risk her own safety for once? I suppose at the time it was for her, even if it meant stopping the Bann from violating Shianni.
From that day on, I didn’t care if Your Warden ever showed her face again. She could go die a merciless death slaying Darkspawn for all I cared. Even that would have been too much of an honor for someone like her. I don’t want to admit it, but I considered Esra scum, no better than the shem whom first kidnapped her and the women. As far as I was concerned, she was dead to me.
Then, she showed up in a Tevinter warehouse, and I saw your majesty and her and two other such adventurers through the bars, slaying the mage whom had captured the lot of us. I was shocked, even disbelieving, when Esra let us out of the cages. I didn’t know what she wanted. None of us did. The mage had offered such a hefty price for all of our heads, something much grander than anything the Bann could have given her, and yet, Esra turned it down without even so much as blinking. What had happened to the self-serving child I had come to recognize in our old life?
She tried to talk to me right then and there, as you very well remember. I turned her away. I was too angry, too emotional to deal with her then. What you don’t know, however, is that she tried to return to my home--her home--in the Alienage later that week before the Landsmeet was adjourned. She pleaded with me to see her again, tried to tell me that she had changed, and that life wasn’t fair. That she had killed Vaughan in Arl Howe’s estate, that she was the one whom had freed Soris, that she'd made such a grand difference in the world in the time she’s been gone. If your majesty hadn’t personally vouched for her in your letter, I wouldn’t have come to believe any of it.
Esra Tabris resolving Dalish and Dwarven conflicts? Saving human villages from attack? Seeing Andraste’s ashes with her own eyes? Helping templars clear a Circle gone mad? All for gathering an army to save Ferelden? You must understand that this is so far removed from the Esra that inhabited the Alienage. Soris and I both spurred her away, and that was the last we ever heard of her.
And, of course, there was the final attack on Denerim, when the horde finally came to the Alienage. I can only go by Shianni’s word, as I was asked to escort some of the younger elves out of the area, but I know that she would never lie to me. Esra coming back in the Alienage’s real hour of need and fighting by our side before heading off to the Archdemon...I suppose, in a way, Esra was on everyone’s side that day.
Shianni told me that she had begun to forgive Esra when she heard what she did, but is a year and a Blight enough to forgive such an injustice? An Archdemon comes and goes, but kin is bound forever. It shames me to say that I did not know how to react to my daughter’s death, your majesty. I didn’t know if I should mourn her death, honor her sacrifice with everyone else, or be relieved that none of her selfishness will harm another living soul.
Now I know, your majesty. I know what she wanted to do, and I wish I had been able to come to this conclusion sooner than I did. I had turned my daughter away when she was trying to atone for her actions, and now it shames me that I never gave her the second chance she deserved. I am her father, I should have hugged her then and there as if she was a six year old once more. Instead, my anger forced my last moments with her away, and I will never be able to tell her how sorry I am for not believing her.
Wounds resulting from the day she left will never be completely healed. Trust is easily knocked down and it’s always difficult to rebuild, perhaps even impossible at times. Elves spit at Esra’s memorial in the Alienage, because they don’t know her like I do. They don’t know her as their daughter, their flesh and blood. They only know her ghost and it pains me so that they don’t know of her last year.
You’ve already done so much for me, your highness. You’ve appointed me Bann of the Alienage and treated us as fairly as you could unlike many. You and the Grey Wardens gave my daughter a life outside of Denerim, a life outside of what she knew. The adventures she had with you truly shaped her into a better person than I ever thought she could be, almost like her mother. And most importantly, those adventures have given me an insight on my daughter that nobody else has ever been able to.
For what my words are worth, thank you, your majesty. I don’t know how much I’ve been able to assist, but I hope this letter helps you understand Esra more now.
My best wishes,
Cyrion Tabris
The King of Ferelden receives a letter from Cyrion Tabris about his daughter, Esra, after the end of the Blight.
Fandom: Dragon Age: Origins
Rating/Warnings: G (Trigger Warnings for rape)
Notes: I recently picked up this game again and beat it with a City Elf. This is inspired by the results of that playthrough.
My most honorable King Alistair,
I write this letter in response to your request to learn more about the Grey Warden, Esra Tabris of Denerim, in light of her sacrifice. I must confess, I don’t completely understand my daughter, even in death. Esra had always been a precocious imp of a girl. She took after Adaia like that. Esra’s face morphed into her mother’s too as she grew older. Blustery hazel eyes with distinguished cheekbones, fiery red hair and rosy lips. She didn’t get any of those from me, I’ll tell you that.
But I am getting off-track here. A father can always see when another man loves his child, and you are no exception. To most I’m sure you did an admirable job of hiding your real feelings for her, but I could see it in your eyes as you bid her spirit farewell in front of the crowd at Redcliffe. Both you and that other elf...Figures, more men would want my daughter after the death of her fiancee at the hands of Bann Vaughan.
Your majesty traveled with my daughter, and are aware of what transpired that day--the real story, not the propaganda that has been spread around. Your Warden was never a soft-hearted person in her childhood, and who could blame her, having grown up in the Alienage with the rest of us? She had her friends and she always had Shianni and Soris around, but she tended to keep to herself. Always.
Esra took great pleasure in sneaking about and playing tricks on others. She always preferred speech over facing consequences. She looked after herself first, and the needs of others second. The girl had charisma and unusual skills that served well in her own survival. She could convince beggars to hand over their earnings to her if she so tried. Esra was always a clever child, perhaps even a deceitful one. Someday, however, that cleverness would go from something innocent to something else altogether.
Dear maker, nothing could have prepared me for the day she left with the Grey Wardens.
Soris and Esra came back to us, bloodied but mostly unharmed. There was no sign of Shianni or any of the other women who had been kidnapped by the Bann and his friends. Esra claimed it was because they were unable to get to them and Soris didn't make any arguments against her word. Later, when Shianni returned, I could tell already that she had terrible news to share with me.
Esra Tabris, my own daughter, sold out her cousin to that despicable man. Accepted a damned bribe and everything, all so she could escape unscathed and save her own skin. She betrayed not just the Alienage, but her cousin, her own flesh and blood. Was it too much to assume that my daughter would risk her own safety for once? I suppose at the time it was for her, even if it meant stopping the Bann from violating Shianni.
From that day on, I didn’t care if Your Warden ever showed her face again. She could go die a merciless death slaying Darkspawn for all I cared. Even that would have been too much of an honor for someone like her. I don’t want to admit it, but I considered Esra scum, no better than the shem whom first kidnapped her and the women. As far as I was concerned, she was dead to me.
Then, she showed up in a Tevinter warehouse, and I saw your majesty and her and two other such adventurers through the bars, slaying the mage whom had captured the lot of us. I was shocked, even disbelieving, when Esra let us out of the cages. I didn’t know what she wanted. None of us did. The mage had offered such a hefty price for all of our heads, something much grander than anything the Bann could have given her, and yet, Esra turned it down without even so much as blinking. What had happened to the self-serving child I had come to recognize in our old life?
She tried to talk to me right then and there, as you very well remember. I turned her away. I was too angry, too emotional to deal with her then. What you don’t know, however, is that she tried to return to my home--her home--in the Alienage later that week before the Landsmeet was adjourned. She pleaded with me to see her again, tried to tell me that she had changed, and that life wasn’t fair. That she had killed Vaughan in Arl Howe’s estate, that she was the one whom had freed Soris, that she'd made such a grand difference in the world in the time she’s been gone. If your majesty hadn’t personally vouched for her in your letter, I wouldn’t have come to believe any of it.
Esra Tabris resolving Dalish and Dwarven conflicts? Saving human villages from attack? Seeing Andraste’s ashes with her own eyes? Helping templars clear a Circle gone mad? All for gathering an army to save Ferelden? You must understand that this is so far removed from the Esra that inhabited the Alienage. Soris and I both spurred her away, and that was the last we ever heard of her.
And, of course, there was the final attack on Denerim, when the horde finally came to the Alienage. I can only go by Shianni’s word, as I was asked to escort some of the younger elves out of the area, but I know that she would never lie to me. Esra coming back in the Alienage’s real hour of need and fighting by our side before heading off to the Archdemon...I suppose, in a way, Esra was on everyone’s side that day.
Shianni told me that she had begun to forgive Esra when she heard what she did, but is a year and a Blight enough to forgive such an injustice? An Archdemon comes and goes, but kin is bound forever. It shames me to say that I did not know how to react to my daughter’s death, your majesty. I didn’t know if I should mourn her death, honor her sacrifice with everyone else, or be relieved that none of her selfishness will harm another living soul.
Now I know, your majesty. I know what she wanted to do, and I wish I had been able to come to this conclusion sooner than I did. I had turned my daughter away when she was trying to atone for her actions, and now it shames me that I never gave her the second chance she deserved. I am her father, I should have hugged her then and there as if she was a six year old once more. Instead, my anger forced my last moments with her away, and I will never be able to tell her how sorry I am for not believing her.
Wounds resulting from the day she left will never be completely healed. Trust is easily knocked down and it’s always difficult to rebuild, perhaps even impossible at times. Elves spit at Esra’s memorial in the Alienage, because they don’t know her like I do. They don’t know her as their daughter, their flesh and blood. They only know her ghost and it pains me so that they don’t know of her last year.
You’ve already done so much for me, your highness. You’ve appointed me Bann of the Alienage and treated us as fairly as you could unlike many. You and the Grey Wardens gave my daughter a life outside of Denerim, a life outside of what she knew. The adventures she had with you truly shaped her into a better person than I ever thought she could be, almost like her mother. And most importantly, those adventures have given me an insight on my daughter that nobody else has ever been able to.
For what my words are worth, thank you, your majesty. I don’t know how much I’ve been able to assist, but I hope this letter helps you understand Esra more now.
My best wishes,
Cyrion Tabris