Oh, sweet child of mine... [Meme]

[absit_omens]

Give me any two characters from any game past or present, as long as one of the characters is mine, and I will tell you - no matter how ridiculous the pairing - the following about their first child:

A. Name
B. House
C. PB (or description if I prove unable to find a good face)
D. Circumstances of conception
E. Three random facts