Addiction
Title: Addiction
Author: Shadx
Pairing: Callie and Arizona
Rating: Pg13-Rish. Nothing graphic.
Summary: Set four months after the elevator break down. Callie and Arizona decided to be friends... let's see how it goes, shall we?
Disclaimer: All television shows, books, movies, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.
“...So after I handed the scalpel to Reed, she just stood there with this ‘deer in the headlights’ look on her face” Callie laughed into the receiver, “and then Karev just took it from her and made the cut, and then as we were closing him up, we realized that she was still just standing there, she hadn't moved an inch! It was priceless!”.
The girlish laughter coming from the other end of the phone made Callie’s heart hurt, just a little bit. “Callie! You can’t pick on the residents, they’re there to learn!” Arizona was trying to stifle a laugh, “but man, I wish I would have been there to see it.”
"I wish you were there too..." she meant for everything, not just the stupid surgery. Yes, they were friends now, great friends even... but there was still a part of Callie that missed being in love with this particular friend. She hoped to god that Arizona hadn't noticed the sadness in her voice.
But when there was a long silence that followed, she knew Arizona had most definitely noticed. They both waited for the other to speak first, each afraid of where this conversation could lead.
“Arizona?” Callie gave in, her voice was softer.
“I’m here- I’m just” she sighed into the phone, cursing herself for letting this get to her, "I’m here.”
“Arizona. It's okay for me to miss us. I know that sometimes this whole 'just friends' thing feels kind weird but-“ she paused, “you have to know how grateful I am that you're still in my life” when there was no response she continued, “you’re my best friend. And a lot of other people would have just turned away and never looked back, but, you stayed, and you made me stay… so… so don't let a silly thing like me missing you, ruin this!” she let out a long breath. She had waited three long months to finally get that off her chest.
___________________________________________________
The first month or so after the big break-up had been difficult, to say the least. Their separation left them both devastated and left them each dealing with extra large doses of heartbreak. All of the usual symptoms were there; the longing, the stolen glances, the stalking of each other’s surgeries… the desperate, hungry kisses that made it so much harder to move on. There are a million different remedies for dealing with the pain of a relationship ending, but they have yet to come up with cure for breaking up with the love of your life, with whom you are still very much in love with.
During some down time in between surgeries, Callie found herself resting in an empty on-call room, it had been three weeks after the split and she was both emotionally and physically exhausted. The pair hadn’t spoken, but since the first time Arizona broke down and kissed Callie in the elevator, things had only become exponentially more complicated. Like the day after the elevator scene, where Callie broke down as she watched Arizona enter the supplies closet, despite her better judgement, she made her way to the small room before anyone had a chance to notice her disappearance. She closed the door softly and as soon as Arizona looked up to meet the familiar set of eyes, the supplies she was holding fell to the floor as they lunged toward each other hungrily.
They began taking turns finding each other, once Callie giving up her search completely in favor of sending a frantic '911' page to the the PEDS surgeon, who immediately knew what kind emergency she was dealing with. They had officially 'broken down' in the locker room, in Arizona’s office, in the skills lab, in the conference room, and most recently, behind one of the curtains in the clinic. The pair chose not to acknowledge the danger of their secret affair, in fact they hadn't exchanged any words at all during the encounters, the only sounds being those of their desperate moans and whimpers. But somewhere along the way, despite their best efforts, they both realized that this little game was rapidly turning into an addiction. So it came as no surprise to Callie when she heard the door of the on-call room open and close hurriedly. She turned over, to see the very same beautiful woman she'd expected, standing at the other side of the room, her eyes burning holes into the carpet and she was fidgeting with her hands- she looked nervous. Callie, ignoring her fatigued state, let a weak smile escape her lips when she noticed Arizona's rare display of vulnerability. She stood up from the bed and walked over to where the blonde stood. When Arizona looked up, Callie noticed the sadness behind her eyes for the first time since they started ‘accidentally’ meeting each other. She let out a long breath contemplating her next move, as she leaned in slowly and ever so gently connected their lips.
The tenderness was unexpected, Arizona had become accustomed to the primal, have-to-feel-you-right-now-or-I’ll-die kisses, those kisses were easier to walk away from. But this, this she did not want, she didn’t want the sweet, caring, warm kisses they used to share, she didn’t want to be reminded of how wonderful this felt. In one quick motion, Arizona turned herself around and slammed Callie against the wall, forcing her tongue to enter the other woman’s mouth, Callie let out a loud moan when Arizona bit her bottom lip. When breathing became an issue, Callie pulled her head away from the blonde and looked into her blue eyes, which seemed to have become more pained than before. This was becoming too much for both of them. She didn’t want her relationship with Arizona to be reduced to random, meaningless hook-ups that would only demean the realness of what they had. They had to stop.
As Arizona moved her lips toward Callie again, she felt the brunette turn away and for the first time since they had started this mini affair, Callie broke the unspoken rule of silence.
“Don’t.”
Arizona shook her head and tried again, but before she could make contact, Callie pulled her into her arms and held tight. “Don’t”, she repeated as Arizona resisted, before giving in and squeezed her back even tighter. They stayed that way for what only felt like hours, both afraid of what letting go would really mean. Arizona moved her head back and stared into Callie’s eyes as she leaned in to kiss her one more time, it was gentle and slow, the way Callie had wanted, and then finally released her grip.
“So" she paused to collect herself, "This is it...” She whispered to the Latina.
“Arizona-“ Callie started before Arizona shook her head ‘no’.
“Callie, if we are going to do this… this not being together thing…” she winced at how much it hurt to say it. “Then we have to do it, for real” she sighed. “But I think this whole sneaking around thing was meant to teach us a lesson or something. I think it meant to show us that we can try to fight it, but in the end we have to be with each other.” Arizona let out a painful chuckle at how adorably confused the brunette looked, “… and since we can't BE with each other the way we want to, then… then you have to be my friend.”
“But... you are my friend” Callie argued, “Arizona, you’re my best friend.”
“You’re my best friend too. But it was different when we were together. We’ve only ever know each other as a couple, we’ve always been ‘Callie and Arizona’ and now we have to be 'Callie’ and ‘Arizona’, and those are two very different people.” She explained, “that means we can’t avoid each other in the hallway’s, and ignore each other at parties…“ she recalled the night of Derek’s party as she shook the thought from her head, "and we have to talk, even if it's just about a crappy surgery." Callie's face had turned pale, “You HAVE to be my friend” Arizona finally pleaded, “okay?”
“Okay.”
“Okay" she took a second to register the response "good" she agreed. Taking Callie's hand in her own, she met Callie's stare, "I’m going to love you forever." She looked away, afraid of not getting through this "... and this way I wont ever to wonder if you’re somewhere hurting or sad or in need of someone to yell at in Spanish" they shared a laugh "This way, I’ll still get to be a part of your life” she moved moved her hand to Callie's face. Her voice cracked a little bit before continuing, “This way, I’ll still get to look after you."
“Arizona..." Callie whined sweetly, "You’re doing that thing again” she pouted.
“What thing?”
“That thing where you feel compelled to protect the things you love” she quickly pulled Arizona in for hug, one of extreme gratitude, and she kissed Arizona's cheek before pulling away, "thank you."
“Have you learned nothing from being with me Calliope?” Callie’s face fell at Arizona's response, “Arizona Robbins is and always will be, a good man in a storm.” Callie grinned and let out a low laugh as Arizona made her way towards the door. Giving Callie one final glance, she found herself back in the halls of Seattle Grace Hospital. Her hand still resting on the doorknob, she leaned against the tall frame and let out the deep breath she had been holding in. Allowing everything sink in one final determined nod she opened her eyes, and noticed a pack of nurses staring right at her, whispering to each other. Arizona simply waved and gave the group one of her signature dimpled smiles, as she finally skated down the hall in the opposite direction.
Callie stood still in the room, as she watched Arizona close the door behind her. As soon as she heard it shut her hand instinctively reached into her pocket and pulled out a long gold chain. She warmly smiled as she studied the heart shaped pendent before finally admitting to herself, “I’m going to love you forever too." Placing the necklace back in her pocket, she set out to finally face the world as simply, ‘Callie’.
___________________________________________________________
“Arizona?” Callie said again, slightly self-conscious about her confession.
“I miss you too” finally came from the other end. “Goodnight Calliope.” Callie felt herself blush just a little bit. While not being intimate with Arizona in so long, had made it easier to keep her romantic feelings at bay, it did nothing to get rid of those damn butterflies. And for that, Callie was grateful.
“Goodnight Arizona.”
Author: Shadx
Pairing: Callie and Arizona
Rating: Pg13-Rish. Nothing graphic.
Summary: Set four months after the elevator break down. Callie and Arizona decided to be friends... let's see how it goes, shall we?
Disclaimer: All television shows, books, movies, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.
“...So after I handed the scalpel to Reed, she just stood there with this ‘deer in the headlights’ look on her face” Callie laughed into the receiver, “and then Karev just took it from her and made the cut, and then as we were closing him up, we realized that she was still just standing there, she hadn't moved an inch! It was priceless!”.
The girlish laughter coming from the other end of the phone made Callie’s heart hurt, just a little bit. “Callie! You can’t pick on the residents, they’re there to learn!” Arizona was trying to stifle a laugh, “but man, I wish I would have been there to see it.”
"I wish you were there too..." she meant for everything, not just the stupid surgery. Yes, they were friends now, great friends even... but there was still a part of Callie that missed being in love with this particular friend. She hoped to god that Arizona hadn't noticed the sadness in her voice.
But when there was a long silence that followed, she knew Arizona had most definitely noticed. They both waited for the other to speak first, each afraid of where this conversation could lead.
“Arizona?” Callie gave in, her voice was softer.
“I’m here- I’m just” she sighed into the phone, cursing herself for letting this get to her, "I’m here.”
“Arizona. It's okay for me to miss us. I know that sometimes this whole 'just friends' thing feels kind weird but-“ she paused, “you have to know how grateful I am that you're still in my life” when there was no response she continued, “you’re my best friend. And a lot of other people would have just turned away and never looked back, but, you stayed, and you made me stay… so… so don't let a silly thing like me missing you, ruin this!” she let out a long breath. She had waited three long months to finally get that off her chest.
___________________________________________________
The first month or so after the big break-up had been difficult, to say the least. Their separation left them both devastated and left them each dealing with extra large doses of heartbreak. All of the usual symptoms were there; the longing, the stolen glances, the stalking of each other’s surgeries… the desperate, hungry kisses that made it so much harder to move on. There are a million different remedies for dealing with the pain of a relationship ending, but they have yet to come up with cure for breaking up with the love of your life, with whom you are still very much in love with.
During some down time in between surgeries, Callie found herself resting in an empty on-call room, it had been three weeks after the split and she was both emotionally and physically exhausted. The pair hadn’t spoken, but since the first time Arizona broke down and kissed Callie in the elevator, things had only become exponentially more complicated. Like the day after the elevator scene, where Callie broke down as she watched Arizona enter the supplies closet, despite her better judgement, she made her way to the small room before anyone had a chance to notice her disappearance. She closed the door softly and as soon as Arizona looked up to meet the familiar set of eyes, the supplies she was holding fell to the floor as they lunged toward each other hungrily.
They began taking turns finding each other, once Callie giving up her search completely in favor of sending a frantic '911' page to the the PEDS surgeon, who immediately knew what kind emergency she was dealing with. They had officially 'broken down' in the locker room, in Arizona’s office, in the skills lab, in the conference room, and most recently, behind one of the curtains in the clinic. The pair chose not to acknowledge the danger of their secret affair, in fact they hadn't exchanged any words at all during the encounters, the only sounds being those of their desperate moans and whimpers. But somewhere along the way, despite their best efforts, they both realized that this little game was rapidly turning into an addiction. So it came as no surprise to Callie when she heard the door of the on-call room open and close hurriedly. She turned over, to see the very same beautiful woman she'd expected, standing at the other side of the room, her eyes burning holes into the carpet and she was fidgeting with her hands- she looked nervous. Callie, ignoring her fatigued state, let a weak smile escape her lips when she noticed Arizona's rare display of vulnerability. She stood up from the bed and walked over to where the blonde stood. When Arizona looked up, Callie noticed the sadness behind her eyes for the first time since they started ‘accidentally’ meeting each other. She let out a long breath contemplating her next move, as she leaned in slowly and ever so gently connected their lips.
The tenderness was unexpected, Arizona had become accustomed to the primal, have-to-feel-you-right-now-or-I’ll-die kisses, those kisses were easier to walk away from. But this, this she did not want, she didn’t want the sweet, caring, warm kisses they used to share, she didn’t want to be reminded of how wonderful this felt. In one quick motion, Arizona turned herself around and slammed Callie against the wall, forcing her tongue to enter the other woman’s mouth, Callie let out a loud moan when Arizona bit her bottom lip. When breathing became an issue, Callie pulled her head away from the blonde and looked into her blue eyes, which seemed to have become more pained than before. This was becoming too much for both of them. She didn’t want her relationship with Arizona to be reduced to random, meaningless hook-ups that would only demean the realness of what they had. They had to stop.
As Arizona moved her lips toward Callie again, she felt the brunette turn away and for the first time since they had started this mini affair, Callie broke the unspoken rule of silence.
“Don’t.”
Arizona shook her head and tried again, but before she could make contact, Callie pulled her into her arms and held tight. “Don’t”, she repeated as Arizona resisted, before giving in and squeezed her back even tighter. They stayed that way for what only felt like hours, both afraid of what letting go would really mean. Arizona moved her head back and stared into Callie’s eyes as she leaned in to kiss her one more time, it was gentle and slow, the way Callie had wanted, and then finally released her grip.
“So" she paused to collect herself, "This is it...” She whispered to the Latina.
“Arizona-“ Callie started before Arizona shook her head ‘no’.
“Callie, if we are going to do this… this not being together thing…” she winced at how much it hurt to say it. “Then we have to do it, for real” she sighed. “But I think this whole sneaking around thing was meant to teach us a lesson or something. I think it meant to show us that we can try to fight it, but in the end we have to be with each other.” Arizona let out a painful chuckle at how adorably confused the brunette looked, “… and since we can't BE with each other the way we want to, then… then you have to be my friend.”
“But... you are my friend” Callie argued, “Arizona, you’re my best friend.”
“You’re my best friend too. But it was different when we were together. We’ve only ever know each other as a couple, we’ve always been ‘Callie and Arizona’ and now we have to be 'Callie’ and ‘Arizona’, and those are two very different people.” She explained, “that means we can’t avoid each other in the hallway’s, and ignore each other at parties…“ she recalled the night of Derek’s party as she shook the thought from her head, "and we have to talk, even if it's just about a crappy surgery." Callie's face had turned pale, “You HAVE to be my friend” Arizona finally pleaded, “okay?”
“Okay.”
“Okay" she took a second to register the response "good" she agreed. Taking Callie's hand in her own, she met Callie's stare, "I’m going to love you forever." She looked away, afraid of not getting through this "... and this way I wont ever to wonder if you’re somewhere hurting or sad or in need of someone to yell at in Spanish" they shared a laugh "This way, I’ll still get to be a part of your life” she moved moved her hand to Callie's face. Her voice cracked a little bit before continuing, “This way, I’ll still get to look after you."
“Arizona..." Callie whined sweetly, "You’re doing that thing again” she pouted.
“What thing?”
“That thing where you feel compelled to protect the things you love” she quickly pulled Arizona in for hug, one of extreme gratitude, and she kissed Arizona's cheek before pulling away, "thank you."
“Have you learned nothing from being with me Calliope?” Callie’s face fell at Arizona's response, “Arizona Robbins is and always will be, a good man in a storm.” Callie grinned and let out a low laugh as Arizona made her way towards the door. Giving Callie one final glance, she found herself back in the halls of Seattle Grace Hospital. Her hand still resting on the doorknob, she leaned against the tall frame and let out the deep breath she had been holding in. Allowing everything sink in one final determined nod she opened her eyes, and noticed a pack of nurses staring right at her, whispering to each other. Arizona simply waved and gave the group one of her signature dimpled smiles, as she finally skated down the hall in the opposite direction.
Callie stood still in the room, as she watched Arizona close the door behind her. As soon as she heard it shut her hand instinctively reached into her pocket and pulled out a long gold chain. She warmly smiled as she studied the heart shaped pendent before finally admitting to herself, “I’m going to love you forever too." Placing the necklace back in her pocket, she set out to finally face the world as simply, ‘Callie’.
___________________________________________________________
“Arizona?” Callie said again, slightly self-conscious about her confession.
“I miss you too” finally came from the other end. “Goodnight Calliope.” Callie felt herself blush just a little bit. While not being intimate with Arizona in so long, had made it easier to keep her romantic feelings at bay, it did nothing to get rid of those damn butterflies. And for that, Callie was grateful.
“Goodnight Arizona.”