Fic: Off the Wall

[sgasesa_admin]

Title: Off the Wall
Author: nightfreyja
Summary: Rodney finds an ancient device which turns John and himself into walls. Pure crack - I almost can't believe I've really written this.
Pairing: McKay/Sheppard with a very slight hint of McKay/Sheppard/Cadman
Rating: Light R for some language
Recipient: looking4tarzan

Warning: This is a happy story. It will look like there's Character Death, but everyone will be alive at the end. No spoilers.

Note: Thanks to liresius for the beta work.

Chapter One - The Accident

From the very first day John had a bad feeling concerning the small blue device Rodney had found in one of the city’s far flung labs. He didn't like that Rodney put all other work aside just to find out what the device had been used for. It seemed as if he existed only for the device now and everything else was entirely unimportant and trivial. He didn't turn up to Elizabeth's birthday party and often missed the regular morning meetings in the conference room. He only appeared when John went to the science labs, grabbed his arm and firmly insisted on him joining the briefings. Radek told John that Rodney wasn’t sleeping and Carson mentioned that he had given countless stay-awake-pills to Rodney in the last few days because he had told him that he needed full concentration for a very secret and urgent project of the science team. John was shocked when he heard that Rodney had lied to Carson and immediately went in search of him.

“Rodney!” he called his team mate when he entered the lab. No one else was there because Radek was off-world and everyone else had long since left as it was well after midnight. Rodney didn't react. He sat at his work station and fiddled around with the small device. It looked like an ugly fat blue apple to John. “RODNEY!”

He didn't even look up when he answered in an urgently obsessed and slightly broken voice, “I've got work to do. Leave me alone.” The tone scared John.

“You lied to Carson, Rodney! To Carson, the person with the warmest heart in this universe! What the hell are you lying to Carson for?”

“Can't you see I'm working? Get out.”

“Rodney!”

Finally the scientist raised his head and glared at his unwelcome visitor. “What is it?” he snapped.

“You lied to Carson,” John repeated sharply. “And I want you to apologize, to sleep and to stop working on this goddamn device!”

“Who are you, my mother?” Rodney replied, shook his head in disbelief and turned to his device again.

Infuriated, John loomed at Rodney's side, staring at him with a mix of anger and deep concern. “I'm your friend,” he yelled, loud enough for Rodney to startle a little and to look up to him. “And you are behaving totally out of your mind since you found that device. I don't know what it is, but it drives you nuts and I'm worried about you and your mental and physical health!”

He almost couldn't believe it when Rodney just shrugged and devoted himself to the device once more. After taking a deep breath, he took Rodney by the scuff of his neck, pulled him out of his chair and with a cry he threw him against the wall behind his desk.

“What the hell is going on with you? Rodney? RODNEY?!”

Mesmerized, the man stared on a point somewhere behind John. He didn't even react when John shook him nor did he try to free himself and return to his desk. John fear ratcheted up.

“Rodney?”

“This is not good,” Rodney muttered quietly. “Not good at all.”

Anxiously, John turned his head. The device had fallen on the ground, but instead of being blue it shone a bright red.

Before he could say anything, there was a bright flash and he lost all sense of time, space and the world.

***

An infinite darkness surrounded him when he regained consciousness. Where was he? What had happened? He tried to move his limbs but they felt incredibly heavy. He couldn't even move his fingers. The longer he tried it and thought about it, the more he was sure that he didn't feel his fingers at all. Slowly, he moved on through his body. Hi arms didn’t respond either, and he wasn't sure they still existed. He couldn't feel his toes or his feet either; his legs were somehow ... gone.

Maybe the explosion had blown his body away and only his head was left.

His head ... his head?!

Carefully he tried to move it, but he couldn't say if it worked because he felt nothing at all. He ordered his eyes to open, but the darkness around him remained and he wasn't sure if anything had moved.

“Rodney?” he asked in a low voice, slightly anxious. “Rodney, are you there?”

The answer came from somewhere close to him, maybe six or seven feet away at his right side. “Colonel?”

“Rodney!” He was endlessly relieved and didn't even try to hide his joy at hearing Rodney's voice. “Are you alright?”

“Does sitting in endless darkness and feeling horribly flat count as alright?” Rodney replied and John frowned (at least he imagined himself frowning, because he couldn't be sure his muscles had caused a furrowing of his brow or not).

“Flat?” he repeated.

“Yeah, flat,” Rodney sighed and John could almost see him rolling his eyes. But only almost, of course, because the darkness around him didn't change. “F-L-A-T. Like I haven't eaten for months or like the landscape of the Netherlands. Like the ocean at our door when there's no wind blowing, like ...”

“Okay, Rodney, I understood,” John interrupted him. Now, after Rodney had given him such a detailed description, he compared it to his own body. Maybe the strong pressure he felt everywhere on him caused the flat feeling Rodney had described ... Yes, the longer he thought about it, the more certain he was that his actual state was 'flat' as well. “What’s happened?”

“How should I know?” Rodney snapped in response.

“Because it was your damn device that brought us into this situation,” John answered. “And because you're the Head of Science and of all people you should be the one who figures out what the hell's going on here!”

“Oh. Fine. Just lay back and let the scientist do all the hard work,” Rodney said with that annoyed smile of his which was more a twitching of his mouth combined with a 'if there's a day when only the two of us left, you are so screwed ' glare in his eyes. Of course John actually couldn't see it but his imagination seemed very real to him.

“Rodney, I can't lay back because I can't move anything.”

For a moment there was silence. John gave up trying to move. At least he was able to communicate with Rodney. Maybe this wasn't the non plus ultra, but it was something.

“Wait,” Rodney said, and his voice sounded like he’d just had a light bulb moment. “You can.”

“My mouth,” John agreed hastily, noticing it just this second. “We can use our mouths.”

“That's something! We can call someone to help us.”

“You found a solution to our problem, as I told you.” John grinned smugly, sure that Rodney knew this.

“Hah. Funny. Okay, let's shout 'hello'. One, two, three!”

John was quite certain that their 'HELLOOOOO' must have reached someone's ears and for a while they just waited for someone to come.

The minutes passed by and nothing happened.

“Do you think it was loud enough?” Rodney asked doubtfully.

John shrugged (oh, hell, he didn't shrug but he imagined his shoulders go up and down so yeah, he DID shrug). “Hm. Actually, yes.”

“Maybe they’re all deaf?”

“Who's 'they'?”

“Well, the people on Atlantis. Uhm... Colonel? We are on Atlantis, aren't we?” The last sentence somehow sounded pretty panicked to John and he swallowed hard. Okay, he didn't, but... oh, for God's sake!

“I... I don't know,” he answered. “Maybe the explosion of your device threw us into another... galaxy? Universe? I have no idea.”

“Fine.” Rodney sighed. “Let's summarize our situation. Around us it's pitch-dark. We feel flat, but we don't feel our bodies in particular. We can't move anything except for our mouths.”

“Wait a second, Rodney - can you feel your mouth? Because I can't.”

“Let me just try ... You're right. Jesus.”

There was silence for another few moments until Rodney added quietly, “Telepathy?”

Under normal circumstances John would have laughed and answered, 'Are you crazy? Telepathy?! You sure you didn't break out of a psychiatric unit?' but these were sure as hell no normal circumstances and he thought better of putting his thoughts into words.

“This is scary,” Rodney said with a slightly panicked voice and John nodded silently. “Very scary, to be honest. I think it's the scariest thing I've ever experienced! Colonel! This is scarier like the scariest nightmare! Are we dead?!”

“Rodney, calm down,” John interrupted him, wanting to lay a hand on Rodney's shoulder which wasn't possible because he didn't know if he still had an arm to lift to touch Rodney. “We are not dead. In death you don't feel flat and communicate via telepathy.”

“How do you know?”

“I don't know anything at all, Rodney! But we shouldn't lose hope so soon. Calm down, okay?”

“O-okay.”

“Alright. And now think of something beautiful.”

“Why?” Rodney asked in confusion.

“It'll take your mind off our situation.”

“Okay.”

It was quiet again until John asked, “What are you thinking about?”

“You don't want to know.”

“I do. Otherwise I wouldn't ask.”

“You really don't want to know.”

“Do I not want to know or do you not want to tell?”

Rodney sighed nerve-wracked. “Just keep quiet. I want to think.”

“About what?”

“Oh, come on! Why are you doing this?”

“What?”

“Asking me things which you, in reality, don't want to know?”

“I'm bored.”

“Oh. Great. Think of something beautiful.”

“I already did. It's boring.”

“If I may remind you, Colonel - it was your own idea to do this.”

“So what? I never said it was a good idea.”

Rodney cursed some things John couldn't understand and then it was quiet again. For a pretty long time.

***

Like a bolt from the blue it got bright around them. In unison, they both cried because the light was hurting their eyes, which they could neither close nor turn away. But after they got used to it, they were grateful that they were able to see something now because they finally found out where they were.

“These are Lieutenant Cadman's quarters,” Rodney said.

“Obviously,” John replied because he saw the young, blonde woman rising from her bed. Her bedside lamp had caused the sudden amount of light hurting John's and Rodney's eyes.

“Hey, Laura,” Rodney yelled and cleared his throat. “Uhm, sorry for disturbing you, we actually have no idea how we got here. It must have been an accident while we worked in the labs, and...”

“Rodney,” John interrupted him softly, “She can’t hear you.”

He was right. Laura rubbed her eyes, yawned and got up. She passed John without noticing him and entered her bathroom through the door on the other side of the room.

“Hey! Laura!” Rodney yelled, but he didn't get a response.

“I can't see you,” John suddenly said while he tried to block out the bathroom sounds Laura made. “Where are you?”

“Here, against the wall,” Rodney answered. “Right next to the door to the bathroom. Where are you?”

“Against the wall, next to the wall where you say you are.”

“This is strange,” Rodney said bewildered. “You're not there. The wall is empty and nobody is standing there.”

“This is strange indeed,” John murmured and frowned. “Can you move now?”

“No.”

“Me neither.”

Laura left the bathroom and scuffed back to her bed.

“Laura! Laura! Can you hear me?” Rodney cried and John thought his ears would fall off. Laura didn't seem to hear anything though and lay back in bed again, switching off the light. John and Rodney were drowned in darkness again.

“This is scary,” Rodney said once again and this time his voice was unmistakably panicked.

“Let's summarize our situation again,” John suggested. “First: we are in Laura Cadman's quarters. Second: we can see and hear her, but she can't see or hear us. Third: we can't move. Fourth: We feel flat. Fifth: We can't see each other.”

“Maybe the device turned us into invisible stones,” Rodney guessed.

Under normal circumstances John would have snorted and called Rodney an idiot, but these weren't normal circumstances so he just answered, “Yeah, maybe. But that doesn't explain why we feel flat. And anyway, stones aren't flat.”

“Maybe we're just ... flat stones? Pinned to the wall?”

“Who the hell would pin invisible flat stones to the walls? Honestly, Rodney, that would look crappy.”

“No. It would look like nothing at all because it is, you know, invisible.”

“You got a point there.”

After thinking hard about their situation, John asked, “What else could we be? What else is flat and invisible? And now don't answer with 'flat and invisible pictures'.”

“Walls,” Rodney said instead.

“What? Invisible walls? What do you ...” He cut off and pondered for a moment. “You think we ... are the walls?”

“It's possible,” Rodney said. “Walls are flat. Walls can't move. Walls have no body. Walls are not invisible, but... You know. Walls are so usual that nobody looks at them. And people can't hear walls when they talk.”

“But walls can't see or speak. Or feel.”

“How can we know?”

John had to admit that Rodney was right. “But there are four walls in this room,” he said. “Why don't they say anything?”

“Maybe because they sleep?” Rodney suggested. “Or maybe they just don't hear us. Maybe they're a different kind.”

“The four of us look pretty much the same,” John contradicted. “It's not very likely that the two of us can talk but they can't.”

“Maybe they can, but only with one another and not with us.”

“Maybe.”

Once again they were quiet for a while. John tried once more to move, but it simply wasn't possible. Maybe it wasn't so unlikely that they were walls ...

“This is strange,” he said. “This is stranger than everything else I've ever experienced.”

Rodney sighed. “Ditto.”

And then it was silent until the morning dawned.

Chapter Two - The Walls Have Ears

When Laura's alarm clock beeped into the silence of the room, John was quite sure that he hadn't slept for a second during the night. He had drifted away into pondering Atlantis, his life and their current state of existence (and the longer he thought about it, the stranger he found that he was actually capable of just thinking for such a long time and doing nothing else). He hadn't come to any conclusions.

“Good morning, Lieutenant,” he greeted the blonde woman whose hair covered her face when she, after switching on the light and hurting John's and Rodney's eyes, crawled out of her bed. Of course she didn't answer him. Instead she sighed as she swung her legs out of bed and staggered into the bathroom.

“Did you sleep?” Rodney asked him.

“No. You?”

“I tried, but I couldn't.” He sighed. “And I'm not tired at all.”

“That's strange, especially after all those nights you spent examining that damn device instead of getting some rest.”

“Well, apparently we don't need sleep, so I don't mind.”

“But if we hadn't turned into walls, you'd be a total wreck now. You already were when I visited you last night. I curse the day you found the fucking device, it didn't just cost you nights of sleep, it's also responsible for ... all this.”

“Ah, so you blame the device for everything, huh?”

John frowned. “Yeah, of course I do! It changed us into walls as far as I know!”

“It isn't entirely the device's fault that this happened!” Rodney contradicted sharply. “It wouldn't have beamed us into this existence if you hadn't thrown it on the floor!”

“It was an accident, Rodney, I didn't -”

“Accident or not, it's your mistake!” Rodney's voice rose. “You should just have left me alone to do my work and not throw me across the room. We'd still be humans if you had simply minded your own business!”

“You're blaming me?” John hissed. “That's just insane, Rodney. If I hadn't been concerned about you and if I hadn't visited you, you'd still be working on the damn thing and ruining your mental and physical health. Haven't you noticed what it did to you? You changed on the day you found it.”

“I didn't change! You're suffering from delusions, Colonel. I just did my job which was to find out more about the device. Maybe I could have saved the universe with it if you hadn't interrupted me.”

“Sure. And next year Christmas and Thanksgiving will be on the same day.” He sighed and continued before Rodney could start his accusations again. “Rodney, I don't care what this device could have done for us! It turned us into walls and that's all I'm interested in right now.”

“You're ignorant. You could have talked to me and not throw me across the room.”

“You didn't respond to me!”

“I was busy as you may have noticed!”

“I don't care how busy you were. You didn't answer me, you didn't join the briefings, you didn't sleep and you lied to Carson. That's not normal, Rodney! That device did something to you and I tried to stop it.”

“And that's the reason you threw it on the floor?”

“Ahhrr!” John had a very strong urge to bang his head against the next wall. The only problem was that he himself was the wall. “It's senseless to argue with you, Rodney.”

“Likewise.”

“Oh, that's just not true! You argue perfectly well with me!”

“I don't think so. As I said, you're totally ignorant concerning my point of view. In your military “we-all-stand-strong“ universe this seems to be usual since I have never seen a member of the military give in during a discussion.”

“That's a lie! And you damn well know it.”

“How can you be so sure? Can you read my mind?”

“No, and I don't want to! I have better things to do in my free time than listen to your nonsense.”

“May I remind you that this nonsense has saved our city more than once?”

“It wasn't just your brain that rescued us - it was also the military. An Atlantis without the weapons and soldiers wouldn't have survived all these attacks!”

“Ah, so you're the super-heroes of Pegasus Galaxy or what? You're not just ignorant, you're also the most conceited person I know!”

“And this from the person who thinks he's the biggest genius of the universe.”

“The difference between us, Colonel, is that I am genuinely the biggest genius of the universe and you are in fact not at all a super-hero.”

“But at least I ...” John started, cutting of when Laura came back into the room. Both held their breath, staring on the beautiful woman who slowly went over to her wardrobe and picked out some clothes.

She was entirely naked.

“Oh fuck,” Rodney moaned when she disappeared in the bathroom again. “I can't believe I just saw Cadman naked! I'll never be able to look into her eyes again.”

“If we don't find a way to get us out of this situation, you won't need to worry because she won't ever see you again.”

They were silent for a moment and listened to the rustling behind the bathroom door.

“We're children,” Rodney murmured a while later and to John it almost sounded like an excuse. “We're trapped in walls and the only thing we do is accuse each other of stupid, trivial things.”

“We have to get out of this,” John said softly, hoping that Rodney would take this as an apology as well. “Maybe we should try to shout once again.”

After they both had taken a deep breath they yelled 'hello' as loud as possible. In the meanwhile Laura came back, fully dressed. She still hadn't noticed them because who was she to know that her walls had ears and eyes. Humming a song John didn't know, she opened the shutters of the window next to her bed. Bright sunlight shone into the room and John looked out on the calm city.

“Crap,” Rodney stated firmly and to John it sounded just like the right thing to say so he didn't need to answer. Swallowing hard, he wondered if they would ever return to their human bodies again.

“Lieutenant Cadman,” a voice suddenly sounded from somewhere next to him. Laura hastened to her bedside table and picked up her radio.

“Yes?” she answered.

“Dr. Weir wishes to see you.” John didn't recognize the voice. Probably it belonged to one of the technicians in the gate room.

“I'll be there in five minutes,” Laura agreed and slipped into her shoes. “What happened?”

“Dr. McKay and Colonel Sheppard have been found lifeless in the physics labs and she wants to interview everyone who might be able to shed some light what has happened to them.”

“My Lord,” Laura murmured in concern, her face falling. “I'll be right there.”

Then she left and the room fell silent.

“So our bodies still exist,” Rodney murmured after they had collected themselves from the quite shocking message from the radio. “But I don't know if 'lifeless' is a good condition to be in.”

“Rather not,” John sighed. “But I assume that we're not dead. Otherwise that guy would have described us as 'dead' and not just 'lifeless'.”

“You have a point there,” Rodney agreed. “But ... what if ...”

“Rodney,” John interrupted him harshly, but his voice was anxious. “As long as we don't get evidence to the contrary, we'll just take it that our bodies are still alive and it's possible to return to them, even if we don't know how yet.”

“Okay,” Rodney muttered with a slightly quivering voice. Next to him, John regretted that he wasn't capable to lay a soothing hand on his shoulder.

“Don't worry,” he said instead, gently and warm. “They'll bring us back.”

“What if they don't?”

“I ... I don't know. Calm down, Rodney. Think of something beautiful.”

Rodney sighed and rolled his non-existing eyes and then they got lost in their own thoughts. For a long time nobody said a word.

***

“Citizens of Atlantis, may I have your attention,” Elizabeth's voice suddenly sounded on loudspeakers through the city. “Colonel Sheppard and Dr. McKay were found unconscious in the labs this morning. The medical team is doing everything in their power to wake them up, but at the moment it seems that something happened in the labs which we can't explain. Therefore it's strictly forbidden for any member of the expedition to enter the physic labs until we know more. We have a special team there to find out more, but no one else is authorized to enter the labs. Furthermore, we’d appreciate any information about the Colonel and Dr. McKay’s whereabouts and actions last night. If you saw them last night or know what they were doing in the labs, please come to my office immediately. Thank you.”

After Elizabeth’s voice had faded, John cursed, “It's absolutely clear what we were doing last night! You’ve been working on the ancient device non-stop so it would be very likely that you were doing the same before we lost consciousness. Or turned into walls. Whatever. They must have found the device as well so it should be pretty clear what happened.”

“Maybe the device disappeared,” Rodney guessed.

“That would be very bad,” John answered. “If anything can beam us back, it'll be the device.”

“And a while ago you complained about it.”

“You make me sick.”

“I'm touched.”

“Great.”

They fell silent again.

***

They didn't talk until the sun was going down outside. Bright sunrays shone right into John's non-existing eyes. Moaning, he once again regretted that he could neither turn them away nor close them.

“What's up?” Rodney asked as if the sound John had made had pulled him out of his thoughts.

“The sun's shining right into my eyes,” John lamented.

“What do you think, is it possible that walls can go blind?” Rodney wondered.

“What? I don't care!” John answered and moaned again, not being able to hide from the pain. Rodney's words though stuck in his mind - what if he really lost his eyesight?

When Laura returned to her quarters a short while later, she freed him from his aches because she pulled the shutters down.

“And?” Rodney asked. “Can you still see?”

“Yes,” John answered, not hiding his relief. “I can see perfectly. You're still flat.”

“Oh, thanks.”

“Don't you get hungry?” John wanted to know. “Usually you demand food every thirty minutes.”

“That's not true,” Rodney contradicted loudly, and added a little softer, “But no, I'm not hungry. Not at all.”

“That's good.”

“Why? I think it's a bad sign that I don't need food! It means that we're pretty far away from being human, and ...”

“Rodney,” John interrupted him. “If you had hunger, you would starve because you are neither capable of getting food nor can you eat, since you don't have a mouth.”

Rodney thought about this for a moment, before he answered, “Maybe you're right after all. But that doesn't change the fact that I'm quite worried about our existence now - what if we can't turn back into humans again? What if we are trapped here forever?”

“That would be hell,” John muttered. “I’d be stuck listening to your moaning and complaining for eternity.”

“Likewise. But seriously, Colonel, what will we do if we can't return?”

“Stay here, I guess.”

Rodney cursed. “Oh, never mind.”

They were quiet again because Laura undressed once more. She threw her clothes carelessly on her bed before she gathered some underwear and disappeared in the bathroom.

“Oh my,” John sighed when the low roaring of the shower sounded through the bathroom door. “She's hot.”

“We can be glad that she is,” Rodney answered. “Imagine if the device had put us into Kavanagh’s room. I mean, I wouldn't mind being a wall in a man's quarters, but Kavanagh is well …. Let’s just say he has hygiene issues. It's unpleasant to work with him although that happens only very rarely because we both hate to work with each other and we both avoid being in the same room whenever possible, but sometimes it's just inevitable.”

“What did you just say?”

“What? I said that I hate Kavanagh. Is there something wrong?”

“No. But did I hear that right when said you wouldn't mind being a wall in a man's quarters?”

Rodney choked and John could almost see his face blushing. “Uhm. Uh. No. I said ... I said ...Yes, you did … hear correctly, that is.” Rodney admitted.

“You're gay?” John asked, his voice the same as before.

“Do you mind?”

“Why should I?”

“I just ...” He cleared his throat before he went on. “You know, the homophobic thing in the Army ...”

“There are more gays in the Army than you think,” John assured him and smiled. Or at least he tried to make his voice sound as if he was smiling.

“What ... uhm ...” Rodney choked before he could go on. When he continued, his voice was kind. “What about you? I ... I just was honest, so ... uh ...”

John laughed. “Do you really want to know, Rodney?”

“Eh, considering that we're pretty close right now, practically constantly touching, and that you know that I'm gay - yes, I want to know if you're attracted to men.”

“No, I'm not.” John wasn't sure if he sounded convincing. “I'm hetero,” he added. “Hundred percent.”

“Okay,” Rodney said sighing. John sighed as well, relieved that Rodney had believed his small lie.

Laura returned to the room, wearing only black underwear. Her hair was wrapped up in a towel and her skin was moist with beads of water. Picking up a bottle of lotion she began to massage it in to her whole body.

John wanted to look away, but his wall-ish eyes didn't allow him to move. Yes, Laura looked damn hot, stroking over her own skin. She had such an attractive body, but she wasn’t Rodney.

It took him a moment before he realized that he had just admitted to himself he’d rather be watching Rodney lotion himself. Scolding himself for thinking such things, he glanced over to Rodney's piece of wall. What if he knew that he was more bi than hetero?

Pondering, he watched Laura finish and don pyjamas before she grabbed a book and lay in bed.

Chapter 3 - Old MacDonald

The next day passed without anything special happening. Laura got up early in the morning, obviously leaving for an off-world mission because she wore her grey fieldwork uniform. In the evening she returned, walked once more naked through her quarters and soon went to bed.

“Good night, Laura,” Rodney murmured when she switched off her light after reading only two pages of her book. They were the only words uttered that day.

In every other situation John would have felt the urge to talk because aside from watching Laura it was the only thing he could do as a wall. But somehow he didn't need it. He felt calm and safe when he was drowned in his thoughts, but after he turned his attention back on what was going on in the room, he could hardly tell what he had pondered about. He intended to talk with Rodney about this, but he sensed a need for quietness from Rodney, so he postponed the conversation for tomorrow.

***

The next afternoon, John was jerked out of his thoughts because Rodney started to sing. He warbled loud, wrong and strident “Old MacDonald Had a Farm”.

“Rodney!” John moaned. “What the hell are you doing?!”

“I'm singing,” Rodney answered and immediately went on with the song.

“But why?” John asked, urged to press his hands on his ears, which was sadly not possible. “And why this song?”

“Why not? I'm bored and this was the first one that came into my mind.”

“It's a crappy song.”

“It's not! I liked it when I was younger.”

“Ah.”

“Do you have a problem with that?”

“No. It's just ... you can't sing!”

“Then join in and you won't notice my off notes.”

John thought about it for a moment and then found himself singing the nursery rhyme. When they were finished, he felt uncomfortably embarrassed. He couldn't sing at all and the thought that he had just sung such a stupid childish song with Rodney who couldn't sing either made him quiver.

“I can't believe we just did that,” he said.

“In desperate situations you have to take desperate measures,” Rodney answered wisely. “But if you have a problem with the memory of singing “Old MacDonald Had a Farm”, don’t worry - nobody heard us.”

“But if we get out of here ...”

“I won't say a word. And me as well - I don't want Radek to know that I ... Oh. Oh my god. Did we just sing a nursery rhyme together?!”

“In desperate situations you have to take desperate measures,” John repeated Rodney's own mantra back at him. “I promise I won't mention it when we're out of this.”

“Me neither. Shit.”

“At least you aren't bored anymore.”

“No, because now I can think about what I've just done. Jesus!”

“He won't be able to help you now so stop cursing and praying and think of something beautiful.”

“Why do you always say that? It doesn't help.”

“Because you keep quiet and I can think.”

“About what?”

“The world. Our current state of existence. My life. I don't know. Why do you ask?”

“Just curious.”

“And you?”

“What?”

“You must have thought about something during the last day or so because you haven’t said much. What did you think about?”

“The same things I guess - how we came here, how we can get out of here ...”

“And? Did you come to any conclusions?”

“No, sorry. We need help to get back to our bodies. Alone it's impossible.”

John sighed. “I expected that. Well then, tell me if you have an idea.”

“Will do.”

Laura came back. Immediately they stopped talking. They didn't see her often and when she wasn't here there was nothing to see so they didn't want to waste the time when something happened in the room with conversations.

***

“Tell me something about you,” John said sometime during the night.

After a few seconds Rodney answered, “Why?”

“I'm bored. Thinking is boring. And I forget most of the things I'm thinking about anyway.”

Rodney sighed. “What do you want to know?”

“What’s it like to sleep with a man?”

“What? You're only thinking about sex, huh? You could have asked me about my mental well-being, about my childhood, about my parents. You could have asked me how I feel when I'm the last one to save Atlantis, when the weight of the whole city lasts on me, when everyone thinks my work isn't worth a cent although it's the most important I've ever done; you could have asked why I became a physicist, where I lived in my youth, why I moved to the other side of the continent when I finished school, why I like cats, how I feel about the fact that I haven't seen my cat for months ... but no, you ask me about sex! I should have known.”

“Will you tell me though?”

Rodney mumbled something which sounded quite similar to “bastard”, before he answered, “I don't think that's your business.”

“Hey, Rodney. We're practically living together. We share quarters. We share a corner. I think I have the right to know more about you.”

“Yes! But ... not my sex life!”

“Why? Because you don't have one?”

“I hate you.”

They fell silent.

“I'm sorry,” John apologized softly in the late morning. Laura had left the room long ago. “I shouldn't have asked you.”

Rodney grunted and seemed to think about it. “It hurts sometimes,” he said quietly and John raised an eyebrow in surprise. Or at least he imagined himself doing this. “But if it's done slowly and ... with enough lube, it's way more satisfying than with women.”

He seemed to wait for John to say something, but after he didn't, he added, “You should try it.”

John swallowed. It was time that he became more honest with Rodney. “I already did.”

“What? But you said you weren't gay!”

“Well, I ... I'm not gay. I switch. Sometimes.”

“Why didn't you tell me?”

“I ... You know, if anyone found out ...”

“I entrusted you with a secret,” Rodney interrupted him bitterly. “I’d expect you to keep it - and to be honest with me as well.”

“I'm sorry, Rodney. Really.”

Rodney fell silent.

“Are you angry?” he asked carefully. No answer. “You know, that'd be pretty bad because we have just us. If we're angry with each other we have nobody to talk with. Nobody to share thoughts with, nobody to moan with about our crappy childhoods ...”

“I had a wonderful childhood,” Rodney claimed.

“That's nice to hear. Does that mean that you're not angry with me?”

“It means that I had a wonderful childhood.” Rodney's voice was collected and calm, neither too loud nor too low and not sharp or harsh. John couldn't read anything from it.

“Well. Whatever.”

Neither of them said anything until Laura returned. Deep in his pondering, John asked himself if he would rather sleep with Laura or Rodney.

His common sense told him that this was a stupid question which he should never ask again. Never, ever again. Never, never, never again.

***

“It cracks me up that we don't know how our bodies are doing right now,” Rodney said after Laura had left the next morning.

“I'm sure they're fine,” John answered, not sure how Rodney thought about him at the moment. Was he still upset? Had he forgotten their argument? “Otherwise ... you know ... if they died ... they would announce our funeral over the radio. And ... well, Laura would maybe cry.”

Rodney sighed sadly and John had to swallow hard. Once again he just wanted to lay an arm around Rodney's shoulders and give him some comfort.

“I'm glad that I'm not here all alone,” Rodney said to his surprise. “I mean, of course there are many people who I would prefer in your place, but you're better than nobody at all. Would be damn lonely.”

John smiled. “Yeah. You’d have to sing “Old MacDonald Had a Farm” alone.”

He could almost feel an amused glare from Rodney on his non-existing skin. “That would be a pity. But with you here, nobody will tell us that we can't sing. What happens when we get back into our bodies again? If we sing? We could sing all day until someone thinks it's enough and ... I don't know, throws us from the next balcony or something.”

“We're lucky,” John agreed, grinning. “Because we're trapped in walls together our lives are saved from evil murder.”

Rodney snorted and started to laugh. John joined him and for the first time since they had turned into walls he felt actually good.

***

Two silent days later, their most terrifying nightmare came true.

“Citizens of Atlantis, may I have your attention please,” Elizabeth said by loudspeakers in the morning. “Dr. McKay, who fell into a coma a few days ago for a still unknown reason, died last night.”

“Oh my god,” Rodney whispered and John held his breath.

“Colonel Sheppard is still alive, but according to Dr. Beckett his condition is worsening and it is very likely that we will lose him before nightfall.” Her voice was tight and although she didn't sob John knew that she was crying. “That's all. Thank you.”

“Oh my god,” Rodney repeated in the same tone and John swallowed hard. “I'm dead. I ... I'm dead. Oh god.”

“Rodney,” John said quietly, more than ever before having the urge to embrace Rodney. “I ... we are ...” He cut off. “I don't ... I don't know what to say.”

“Me neither. I can't believe it. Oh god. I'm dead.”

For a while they were silent, but then John heard Rodney softly sobbing.

“Hey,” he whispered. “It's alright, you're still here.”

“I'm dead!” His voice was almost inaudible although John was so close to him. “I'm dead. John, what shall I do now?”

“Calm down,” John soothed him. “You're still here, with me. It's okay. Shh.”

Then Rodney cried and John soon wept with him because first, Rodney was dead. Second, he would die as well, and third, he couldn't embrace Rodney, now that he needed to most.

No tears dropped to the ground because he didn't have real eyes, but his heart wept and so did Rodney's. He didn't know how long they cried for and when they stopped, but when Laura came back to her quarters in the afternoon, she threw herself on the bed and cried so much it almost broke John's heart. Next to him Rodney had started to weep again and all that John felt was endless grief.

***

Laura left again after a while and outside the sun approached to the point of hurting John's eyes, but right now he didn't care.

“How are you?” he softly asked Rodney when he had collected himself.

“Worse than ever before,” Rodney answered with a thick voice. “I'm a wall. I'm a fucking wall while my body lies in the infirmary’s morgue, dead. I ... Were going to be walls for eternity! Nobody will try to rescue us now because why would they? We're not alive anymore. We're doomed. We'll always be here, we’ll see Laura grow older, we'll watch a new habitant moving in, we'll see this room being empty for years because nobody's living here, we'll be here when the Wraith take over the city and maybe we'll still be there when the city breaks up and sinks into the sea. There we'll be, in our silent watery grave. Maybe we'll still be here when this planet dies. Then we'll float around in space, with no hope of rescue, always … for eternity.”

For the moment John didn't know what to answer. “Stay positive”? Rather not. That was probably the most useless advice ever.

“At least... at least we'll be together,” he said instead.

“Yeah, that's something,” Rodney agreed softly. “I think ... I think I would go nuts if I were ... alone, all the time ...”

“Me too,” John muttered. “That'd be horrible.”

“I'm glad to have you here, John,” Rodney whispered, almost inaudible for John.

He was about to answer that when Elizabeth's voice sounded through the radio once again.

“This is Weir speaking. I just want to inform you that Colonel Sheppard died a minute ago. He was ...”

Then there was a sudden flash of light. The voice and the world passed away and John lost consciousness.

Chapter Four - Home

“Are you sure they're dead?”

“What kind of question is that? Of course they are!”

“They look quite alive and kicking if you ask me.”

“What?”

“Dead people don't breathe, do they? Look, their chests are moving. And usually corpses have pale faces, right? These here look like they're just sleeping.”

“Holy Mary, you're right. Get Beckett here. Fast!”

Who the hell was talking? Both were female voices but John didn't recognize them. He heard the noise of someone running quickly away, shouting Carson's name, and felt a trembling finger at his neck.

“Colonel Sheppard?” the voice asked softly. Something smelt really disgusting but John couldn't identify what it was. “C-can you h-h-hear me?”

Where was he? What had happened? He tried to move his fingers and he was quite sure that they twitched. Did he feel flat? No. Could he move? He pulled his eyes open and closed them right away because bright light welcomed him with the hurting intensity he knew from the afternoon sun.

“Colonel!” The voice was now excited and the person squeaked so much it hurt John's ears. “Colonel! Can you hear me? Can you hear me? Answer! Can you hear me? Colonel?”

“And nobody cares for me, huh?” Rodney's miffed voice sounded from somewhere at his right side.

“Doctor! Oh my god!”

“Ah.” Rodney's voice suddenly went smug. “They finally realize who I truly am.”

Slowly John opened his eyes again and immediately covered them with his hands, moaning. “How about switching off the damn light?” he asked and blinked, carefully sitting up. The infirmary materialized around him. A young and pale nurse with big, anxious eyes stood at the left side of the bed he was lying in, covered with a thin white blanket. Rodney lay in the bed next to him, rubbing his eyes.

“You're alive,” the nurse gasped.

“Of course we are, what've you been thinking?” Rodney snapped and sneered when the nurse fainted with a theatrical sigh. “What the hell's going on here? Why are we here?”

“We turned back,” John answered and frowned, fiddling around with the white hospital clothes he was wearing. “Or is this just a figment of our imaginations?”

“To me it feels pretty real,” Rodney said, grinning when a soft growling sounded from somewhere in the area of his stomach. “Hear? I'm hungry. This is definitely reality.”

A huge smile split John's face up into two halves. “I don't know why, but we made it, Rodney - we're back.”

“And I thought we were dead,” Rodney answered.

John pointed down at the nurse lying next to his bed. “Apparently everyone else thought the same.”

A moment later Carson stormed into the room, followed by at least half a dozen nurses, and stopped stunned a couple of steps away from their beds. “Colonel!” he gaped. “Rodney!”

“Hi Carson,” Rodney greeted him and waved.

Another nurse fainted. Carson didn't notice, his eyes were locked on the two men sitting upright in their beds. “You're supposed to be dead,” he said in amazement, not moving.

John and Rodney shared a quick glance. “Sorry to disappoint you,” Rodney mumbled.

“Disappoint?” Carson finally managed to free himself from his trance. Slowly he approached them, quickly blinking as if they were an illusion he wanted to get rid of. “I can't say how ... oh, god. This is a miracle. You were dead. I'm totally sure that you were dead.”

John shrugged and slipped out of the sheets. “We actually thought the same,” he said. When he stood on the floor, he trembled a little because his sense of balance didn't work first. Carson was immediately at his side and steadying him.

“You okay?” he asked and carefully patted his shoulder when he nodded. “I can't believe it.”

“You should open your windows again, guys,” Rodney said sniffing, and rose from the bed as well. Probably a little bit too fast because with a loud thud he dropped to the ground. Cursing and with a flushing face, he got up. Swaying, he leaned on the bed, waving all nurses away. “I'm fine. You should look after these ladies.” He pointed to the two women who had fainted.

“I'm afraid we can't explain what happened,” John regretted in answer to Carson's face which consisted of a big question mark. “Can we talk to Elizabeth?”

“First I want to make sure that you're fine, lads,” Carson insisted and pushed him down on the bed again. “You won't leave this room before being thoroughly checked!”

***

The check took almost two hours. Carson ran umpteen tests, always mumbling “This is incredible. I don't believe it!” until Rodney snapped at him with an annoyed “Yes we are alive, Carson! Yes it is incredible! But could you please stop telling us? I think we know it better than you!”

Elizabeth dropped by and soon Teyla, Ronon and - to Rodney's surprise - Radek as well, but Carson sent them all outside before they could start any conversations.

At some point John asked why everything around smelt so disgusting. Both he and Rodney swallowed hard when he answered, “You are smelling disgusting, not the room. You were dead and we did with you what one does with all dead people, you know, to avoid immediate decay.” After that they quietly submitted to the remainder of the tests.

When they were done and left the infirmary together, wearing their own uniforms again, Ronon and Teyla awaited them with both glad and bewildered faces.

“Hey, guys,” John greeted them, smiling, before he was pulled into a bear hug by Ronon.

“We don't know what happened, but we are relieved to have you back alive,” Teyla said after she had touched their foreheads and Ronon had let go of a moaning Rodney who looked like his team mate had broken his ribs.

“Likewise,” John replied. “We thought we would never see any of you again.”

“Elizabeth told us to bring you right into her office when Carson released you,” Teyla informed them and pointed to the transporter. “She is ... well ...” she shrugged helplessly … “confused.”

“I can imagine that,” Rodney sighed and together the four made their way to the transporters.

When they were walking through the corridors leading through the gate room, everyone stared at John and Rodney as if they were aliens with three big green heads. Some people fainted or went pale; others squealed happily and ran off to tell their friends about the mysterious resurrection.

Elizabeth was alone in her office when they entered and she immediately hugged them, a little less powerfully than Ronon but with the same amount of joy and relief.

“Take a seat, please,” she indicated and the four sat down in the chairs in front of her desk. “Now. What the hell happened?”

“We were walls,” Rodney answered instantly.

“I guess we should start at the beginning,” John suggested after he watched the other's jaws drop and their faces turn confused.

“I agree,” Elizabeth sighed.

John scratched his head and started their report. “A few days ago ... Did you count the days, Rodney? How long have we been walls?”

“Seven days,” Teyla answered in Rodney's place, who just shrugged.

“Okay. Seven days ago, I went to the labs at night because I wanted to look after Rodney. He hadn't slept for days because he had been working on the blue device he found. I wanted to force him to go to bed, but he resisted and continued his work. Well, I got very concerned about him and pulled him out of his chair and threw him at the wall.”

“That hurt, by the way,” Rodney threw in.

“Anyway. I scolded him, but instead of answering in his usual way, he just stared behind me. When I turned round, I saw the device laying on the ground.”

“Because you threw it down.”

“I didn’t do it intentionally, but anyway, the thing suddenly changed color. A second later I felt like there was a silent explosion and I lost consciousness.”

“Same here,” Rodney confirmed. “There was a light flash, but no sound.”

“When I woke up, everything was dark around me. I couldn't move, and Rodney couldn’t either.”

“But we were able to talk with each other,” Rodney continued. “It sounds odd, but the whole situation is odd, so I can say it: we felt flat. Seriously, I've felt flat often enough in my life because sometimes I simply forget to eat. But I've never felt this flat.”

“Flat like a wall,” John explained.

“Yeah. Like a wall. A few hours later a light was switched on and after our eyes got used to the brightness, we saw Lieutenant Cadman's quarters. She got up from her bed and went into the bathroom, while we wondered what the hell was going on.”

“It took us a while to figure it out, but in the end we were sure that we were two of Lieutenant Cadman's walls.”

Elizabeth looked like she couldn't decide whether to be amused or let go of the laughter she was struggling to repress. Teyla did both.

“No joke,” John added. “We were walls. Don't ask me why or how, but the device's explosion turned us into walls. We weren't hungry, we couldn't move, we didn't need sleep, our eyes were open all the time ...”

“We heard over the loudspeakers that our bodies were dying,” Rodney told. “I can tell you, I never ever want to hear someone saying that my body is dead while my mind is still thinking. It's the most frightening feeling ever.”

“Rodney's body died first and you announced my death as well, so I think you can understand that our mood wasn't the best. We were afraid that we might be walls forever. It wasn't nice. Then you were talking about my body being dead and there was this big, bright bang again and I woke up with the feeling that I was in a human body rather than in a wall.”

“And everyone fainted when they saw us,” Rodney said. “That's it. That's our story.”

Biting her lip, Elizabeth fell silent. Her facial expression had turned anxious and thoughtful but John couldn't read her mind.

“Weird,” Ronon stated after a few silent moments. No one in the office felt the need to add anything.

“And now it's your turn,” John encouraged the others after they had all gathered their thoughts.

“Radek found you two lifeless when he entered the labs in the morning,” Elizabeth told them with a calm voice. “You were taken to the infirmary where everything was done to find out what had happened and to bring you to consciousness again. But all efforts were in vain because you didn't wake up. On the contrary, your condition got worse. You said you heard it yourself - you died. You were already being prepared for the funeral. It’s no wonder that so many people fainted when they saw you again.”

“Did you find the device?” Rodney asked, but Elizabeth shook her head.

“No. Radek knew that you had worked on it and assumed a relation between your passing and the device, but it didn't turn up again.”

“And you're sure ...”

“Yes. He looked everywhere. It's gone.”

***

After leaving Elizabeth's office, John and Rodney parted. Rodney went straight into the labs (“to check if everything's still working”, but John knew he wanted to see Radek) and John fled to his quarters because everyone who passed his way seemed to think that he was there to be pestered with questions.

When he had closed the door behind him, he sank down on his bed and looked out of the window. The sea was calm, still a little lightened by the fading light of the sun.

It won't hurt my eyes anymore till tomorrow afternoon, he thought immediately and snorted quietly when he realized that the sun would never hurt his eyes again like it had done in the last days. Sighing, he leaned back, placed his head on the cool pillows and sighed.

He knew he should catch up with all the stuff he had missed, meet some friends, maybe sit together with his team or talk to Laura. He knew he should feel cheerful and happy because he was finally back home in his own body again.

Instead he felt lonely.

Rodney had been so close to him for seven days, he had always been present, even when both had been drowned in deep thoughts. They had practically been in the same body since their eyes had mostly seen the same things (though Rodney had been unaffected by the afternoon sun), they had shared a corner, shared quarters. A fate together.

Now he could do what he wished to do, his body obeyed his orders and if Rodney annoyed him again he could simply walk away instead of having to listen to him nonstop.

He knew he should be glad to be himself again but he wasn't. Not at all.

***

Around midnight, when the light was dimmed in his room and the ocean lay in darkness beyond his window, someone knocked at John's door. He had started to read through the mission reports of the last day which Major Lorne had brought him but his thoughts were somewhere else - in the past, only a few hours away. He got up and opened the door.

One part of him was amazed, one was relieved to see Rodney standing in front of him.

“Hi,” he greeted him, indicating a smile.

“Good evening, John,” Rodney said, smiling as well. “May I come in?”

“Yeah, sure,” John answered and stepped back so Rodney could enter.

After they had sat down at John's small table, Rodney asked, “So, how’s it going?”

John knew he actually meant “How are you feeling?”

“Well,” he answered and corrected himself immediately. “No. It's weird. I quickly got used to being a wall, but the other way round it's difficult.”

“I sometimes don't know where to put my limbs,” Rodney told. “As a wall we didn't have to care about the fingers of our left hand or about the way we use the muscles in our faces.”

“I guess we just need to sleep it off and tomorrow we'll feel a little more ... at home in our bodies,” John mused quietly.

“I hope we do,” Rodney agreed and sighed.

“So, what've you been doing since the meeting in Elizabeth's office?”

“It was actually quite crazy,” Rodney said. “When I reached the labs, everyone already knew what had happened to me and I had the feeling that some of the guys thought that something was wrong with our brains.”

“Pfft. They have no idea.”

“I agree. Radek did as well because he told them to be quiet and to be happy that I was alive than make stupid assumptions about my mental health. You know, I think he was really glad to see me again.”

Rodney sounded as if he hadn't expected this and John chuckled. “Of course he was. Everyone was.”

Snorting, Rodney shrugged. “Anyway. I told our story over and over again and Radek informed me about their work during my absence. That’s all I've done this evening.”

“Haven't seen Laura yet, have you?”

“No. I'm afraid to.”

“Me, too.”

“Will we tell her?” Rodney asked.

“She knows that we’ve seen everything in her room and she knows that she walked around naked, so I think it's impossible to deny that we saw her without clothes. But we should talk to her. Hopefully this can stay a secret among the three of us. And ... well, we should tell her that we ... you know ... aren't so attracted by naked women.”

Rodney smiled insecurely and scratched his head. “We should do this tomorrow before everything else,” he agreed, looking around as if he was searching for something. “You got something to eat here? You know, they have delicious stuff in the commissary, but I haven't got much time to ...”

“It's okay,” John interrupted him and rose, smiling. “I got myself a dinner a few hours ago and there's still something left.”

He brought Rodney a tray with a half sandwich, an apple and a banana. “John, you're a hero, thank you,” Rodney sighed in relief and started to eat immediately.

“You're welcome,” John answered and sank back on his chair. For a while neither said anything and John contemplatively watched Rodney eating. Having his friend around made him feel better - he was a little less lonely now, but still he didn't feel as complete as during their existence as walls.

“You started to call me John,” he pointed out when Rodney had finished his late dinner with an amused smile on his lips.

“Oh, really?” Rodney frowned. “Shall I ... stop it?”

“No! No. I like it. Honestly.”

Rodney joined his smile. “Hm. You know what?”

“Yes?”

“I miss it.”

“Being a wall?”

“Kinda, yes. Call me stupid, but despite the boredom and everything... it was a nice time.”

“Indeed it was,” John answered and earned a friendly smile because he hadn't replied with 'You ARE stupid, Rodney'.

“I'm glad we're in real life again, but ... I don't know. There's something lacking. As a wall, you were always ... I was never alone. Now I am, of course. I mean, it's not like I'm not relieved to have my private life back, but down in the labs ... I felt kinda ...”

“... lost?” John suggested, wording his own thoughts.

“Yeah. Lost. Odd, isn't it?”

John nodded and looked into Rodney's face which he hadn't seen during the long days as a wall but which he had always imagined when talking to him. “You know, when we heard that we were dying and all that ... when you said that you were glad to have me there, I didn't have the chance to answer because Elizabeth interrupted me and then there was the explosion or whatever that was. I ... I wanted to say that I was glad to be there together with you as well. And looking back, I'm still glad that it was you who was turned into a wall with me. I don't know ... other people would have been ... annoying.”

Rodney laughed. “Even more than me, huh?”

“Right.” John grinned. “And they wouldn't have sung 'Old MacDonald' with me.”

Covering his face with his palms, Rodney chuckled, “Oh, please don't mention that ever again. It was the most embarrassing thing I've ever done and I want to forget it as soon as possible.”

“I don't,” John contradicted. “It was fun!”

“We behaved like children!”

“So what? We were walls and nobody can blame us.”

“But ...”

John reached over the table and patted Rodney's shoulder. “I won't mention it when there are other people around, promise!”

“Thank you.” Rodney didn't seem to mind that John's hand stayed a little bit too long on his shoulder. “Others probably would have told it to everyone on the base.”

“But I'm not others. I'm the very special John Sheppard and I won't say a word, okay?”

“Okay.”

An embarrassed silence suddenly lay between them and Rodney tried to end it by clearing his throat.

“Well. Uhm. I should go ... You know, I look forward to lying in a bed again.”

“Then I won't stop you,” John said and rose to accompany his visitor to the door.

“Well then,” Rodney muttered when he was standing in the doorway, prepared to leave. “Thank you for the dinner. And the talk.”

“Yeah. You, too.” John choked and added, “Would be nice if we could repeat it.”

Smiling, Rodney nodded. “Definitely we'll do that. You got time tomorrow evening?”

John laughed. “How the hell should I know that? I have no idea what happened to my schedule in the meanwhile. I'll tell you as soon as I know, okay?”

“Sounds good,” Rodney said and raised a hand to wave. “So ... Good night, John.”

“Sleep well.”

They kept looking into each other's eyes for another long moment before Rodney finally turned round and walked down the corridor. John went back into his quarters, closing the door behind him. His right hand still felt warm where he had touched Rodney and he imagined touching him again, a little longer this time.

Tomorrow, maybe.

With a happy sigh he sank on his bed and closed his eyes, just like a few hours ago when he had thought about his return into human life.

Did I change during Rodney's visit?, he asked himself.

The immediate answer was yes. He still felt kind of lost in his own body and he still knew that it would take a long time to get used to this old life again.

Quickly he took off his clothes and switched off the light. Sliding under the blanket, he completed his answer.

Maybe Rodney and he weren't one anymore. Maybe they were now able to walk wherever they wanted. But he wasn’t as lonely now, like he had felt earlier. They had each other - not with the same kind of connection they had as walls, but they shared the same memories and John felt that something big and very good would build from their experiences.

-The Beginning-