sidlj
in
sg1_smooch
Timing Isn't Everything, Jack/Daniel, PG-13
Based on a prompt by badgerling at comment_fic: Jack/Daniel, one year after coming back from the dead, Daniel finally gets the memory of their first kiss back. 950 words, PG-13.
Timing Isn't Everything
So, it's very weird the way memory works. Intriguing, I might say, if the memory in question wasn't my own. Some of the first things that came back to me after the Ancients and I parted company were my languages. Now, that right there is a good example of why recovering from amnesia can never be the exact same process for different people. Someone else might have remembered how to bake a cake, defuse a bomb, defuse a bomb baked inside a cake… you catch my meaning. Everybody remembers standard things like how to talk, get dressed, chew and swallow, plus more advanced stuff like driving a car. And of course no one ever forgets how to ride a bicycle, or so they say. Those are mechanical skills. Knowing how much flour, sugar, how many eggs to put into a cake batter is more specialized knowledge. Right up there with bomb disposal, as far as I'm concerned, both of them being subjects that I would approach with, oh, approximately equal degrees of wariness.
So I got my languages back before I remembered my parents. For me, my personal history really lagged behind everything else, and those memories tended to come in bite-sized chunks rather than a smooth flow. My first regained memory of my parents was the sound of my mother screaming. Not as painful as you might think, since I had no foundation for grief at that point. It was several days before I had any more memories of them. Of course, I might have been blocking them out to some extent at that point, whereas I was eager with regard to almost everything else.
Reading mission reports started bringing back memories of the SGC, of SG-1, and of course made the situation and peril our planet was in pretty clear. So I had a pretty good idea of who my teammates were, I could still shoot a gun, I could translate inscriptions and identify cultures and I knew who the bad guys were. I was back out in the field on a regular basis pretty quickly, not even counting that first mission. I still had major, major gaps in my memory. Most of them I knew were there. Some, I had no idea. You know when you can't remember a single thing about high school, because you know you went to high school. But if you've forgotten that you're in love, well, you would have no way of knowing, barring a wedding ring or someone waiting for you at home.
I guess, with everything else that was going on, maybe I didn't have time to notice how attractive Jack was? Which notion, I might add, pisses him off royally, the arrogant bastard. He knows he's sex on legs. Anyway, fortunately it didn't take too long before my memories of our relationship began coming back to me. And of course Jack knew, immediately. Because he saw that I was looking at him differently, and he saw because he'd been watching. Waiting. Wow, I still get a little ache when I think of what he went through. A year without me, and silence and indifference when I came back. Ouch.
But my point being how weirdly memory can act, although I was soon back together with Jack, there were still gaps. As was still true about much of my past at that time. Not really an issue or a concern, because things continued to come back to me every day. Time went on, stuff happened, and the biggest gap in my life was suddenly the Jack-shaped gap. Ancient head-sucker, Antarctica, yadda yadda.
I think I remembered more about my history with Jack after he was gone than while we were together. Which makes sense, since he was all I could think about, and it wasn't like we were making any new memories together. Boy, does that sentence look pitiful.
Anywho, things got to the point where there was really only one high school-type memory that I knew I was still missing. Our first kiss. There had to be one, obviously, and I knew if any of the kisses I remembered were the first, I would remember. So the first time we had sex, which I remembered quite vividly, there was plenty of kissing going on, but it wasn't the first time. Our first kiss happened before that. Maybe right before? Not likely, since the SGC has security cameras everywhere. Except storage closets.
Moving on. As I was saying, that memory was still missing, even after an entire year. Until today. Thor saved Jack, we all saved Sam, Jack got promoted, and today his first act as commander of the SGC was to give Sam her own much deserved promotion. And I'm standing there in a room full of happy, smiling people, happy and smiling and applauding myself, while Jack raises his hand and begins the swearing-in ceremony with, "I, insert name…", and I remember, suddenly, clearly, a joking, "Open mouth, insert tongue," delivered in a gasping voice - my voice, by the way - in the middle of what began awkwardly and ended scorchingly, to wit, our first kiss. I remember every second of it. I'm reliving it.
Yes, picture it: I'm standing there in the middle of a crowded Gateroom with my mouth hanging open and my pants threatening to get a little tight and undoubtedly a glazed expression on my face. I've never claimed to have good timing. But everyone's watching Jack and Sam, so I have a minute or two to get myself back under control. Or, almost. When Jack came down the ramp he took one look at my face and said, "What?"
I'll tell him tonight.
Timing Isn't Everything
So, it's very weird the way memory works. Intriguing, I might say, if the memory in question wasn't my own. Some of the first things that came back to me after the Ancients and I parted company were my languages. Now, that right there is a good example of why recovering from amnesia can never be the exact same process for different people. Someone else might have remembered how to bake a cake, defuse a bomb, defuse a bomb baked inside a cake… you catch my meaning. Everybody remembers standard things like how to talk, get dressed, chew and swallow, plus more advanced stuff like driving a car. And of course no one ever forgets how to ride a bicycle, or so they say. Those are mechanical skills. Knowing how much flour, sugar, how many eggs to put into a cake batter is more specialized knowledge. Right up there with bomb disposal, as far as I'm concerned, both of them being subjects that I would approach with, oh, approximately equal degrees of wariness.
So I got my languages back before I remembered my parents. For me, my personal history really lagged behind everything else, and those memories tended to come in bite-sized chunks rather than a smooth flow. My first regained memory of my parents was the sound of my mother screaming. Not as painful as you might think, since I had no foundation for grief at that point. It was several days before I had any more memories of them. Of course, I might have been blocking them out to some extent at that point, whereas I was eager with regard to almost everything else.
Reading mission reports started bringing back memories of the SGC, of SG-1, and of course made the situation and peril our planet was in pretty clear. So I had a pretty good idea of who my teammates were, I could still shoot a gun, I could translate inscriptions and identify cultures and I knew who the bad guys were. I was back out in the field on a regular basis pretty quickly, not even counting that first mission. I still had major, major gaps in my memory. Most of them I knew were there. Some, I had no idea. You know when you can't remember a single thing about high school, because you know you went to high school. But if you've forgotten that you're in love, well, you would have no way of knowing, barring a wedding ring or someone waiting for you at home.
I guess, with everything else that was going on, maybe I didn't have time to notice how attractive Jack was? Which notion, I might add, pisses him off royally, the arrogant bastard. He knows he's sex on legs. Anyway, fortunately it didn't take too long before my memories of our relationship began coming back to me. And of course Jack knew, immediately. Because he saw that I was looking at him differently, and he saw because he'd been watching. Waiting. Wow, I still get a little ache when I think of what he went through. A year without me, and silence and indifference when I came back. Ouch.
But my point being how weirdly memory can act, although I was soon back together with Jack, there were still gaps. As was still true about much of my past at that time. Not really an issue or a concern, because things continued to come back to me every day. Time went on, stuff happened, and the biggest gap in my life was suddenly the Jack-shaped gap. Ancient head-sucker, Antarctica, yadda yadda.
I think I remembered more about my history with Jack after he was gone than while we were together. Which makes sense, since he was all I could think about, and it wasn't like we were making any new memories together. Boy, does that sentence look pitiful.
Anywho, things got to the point where there was really only one high school-type memory that I knew I was still missing. Our first kiss. There had to be one, obviously, and I knew if any of the kisses I remembered were the first, I would remember. So the first time we had sex, which I remembered quite vividly, there was plenty of kissing going on, but it wasn't the first time. Our first kiss happened before that. Maybe right before? Not likely, since the SGC has security cameras everywhere. Except storage closets.
Moving on. As I was saying, that memory was still missing, even after an entire year. Until today. Thor saved Jack, we all saved Sam, Jack got promoted, and today his first act as commander of the SGC was to give Sam her own much deserved promotion. And I'm standing there in a room full of happy, smiling people, happy and smiling and applauding myself, while Jack raises his hand and begins the swearing-in ceremony with, "I, insert name…", and I remember, suddenly, clearly, a joking, "Open mouth, insert tongue," delivered in a gasping voice - my voice, by the way - in the middle of what began awkwardly and ended scorchingly, to wit, our first kiss. I remember every second of it. I'm reliving it.
Yes, picture it: I'm standing there in the middle of a crowded Gateroom with my mouth hanging open and my pants threatening to get a little tight and undoubtedly a glazed expression on my face. I've never claimed to have good timing. But everyone's watching Jack and Sam, so I have a minute or two to get myself back under control. Or, almost. When Jack came down the ramp he took one look at my face and said, "What?"
I'll tell him tonight.