[FIC] What a Kiss Could Do, ONE-SHOT
Title: What a Kiss Could Do
Pairing: QMi
Rating: R (for sexual situation)
Genre: Fluff, Romance, Comedy, Crack
Disclaimer: Not that I own the boys or anything but hey, I CAN DREAM, RIGHT? :D
Summary: The internet’s gone, the Trojan horse munchies his computer next and Zhou Mi’s rambling something about kisses. Kyuhyun’s annoyed, really, really annoyed. Or isn’t he?
--
It started with a ‘shit’ when the server wavered and that CONNECTION DISCONNECTED balloon popped out of his screen. No sooner than later, the laptop turned white with texts that said PAGE CANNOT BE DISPLAYED. Kyuhyun scowled and smashed the keyboard, swearing that every netizen in Korea was out to get his precious internet time when he was free of schedule.
This cannot be happening, Kyuhyun grumbled to himself, rewiring and checking his laptop for any misplaced connection or something and apparently, all was well and the internet was just being an idiot. What a perfect moment to get disconnected when he was pawning - and winning, mind you - gamers out there. What was he going to do now? Join Zhou Mi on his bed?
No, it wasn’t what you were thinking as much as you want it because Zhou Mi was too engrossed reading the latest Cosmopolitan issue and Kyuhyun couldn’t take it anymore and hit the bed-intruder with the nearest plush gift at hand.
“What is it this time?” Zhou Mi asked, not looking up from his magazine and merely ignored the scowl look on Kyuhyun’s face; the plush left unattended at his side.
“I got disconnected from the only world I know where I belong.”
“That’s wonderful, honey.” Zhou Mi said, obviously inattentive and turned a page, whistling happily when he reached the 2010 Best Branded Bag in Asia - his all-time favourite.
“Are you even listening? The internet’s suddenly gone and you’re going on about-” Kyuhyun peered over the magazine and grimaced. “-BAGS?! Why are you even reading that sissy thing!?”
“Well, excuse me, Mister I’m-too-manly-to-see-what’s-new-for-my-skin-and-health-care-products-and- fashion. This magazine helps and you’d know if you didn’t have pimples on your face or use Louis Vuitton man-purses.”
“WHAT?” It was all Kyuhyun could say before Zhou Mi properly propped himself on the bed and turned another page. He watched him doing so, catching the glimpse of the cover. “AND WHY WOMEN’S? Isn’t there like, MEN’S Cosmopolitan?”
Okay, where did that come from, Kyuhyun didn’t know.
And Zhou Mi made a face; his perfectly contoured face distorting. “And see tons of naked, buffy men? I don’t think so.”
“ But you like men, you liar.”
“I like girls, see?” Zhou Mi then raised the article and pointed some Western actress who Kyuhyun didn’t know. “ Ain’t she just pretty with that funky dress and volatized blonde hair? I like girls-“ Zhou Mi paused looking up in the air, as if contemplating and then adding as well, “- and a specie labelled as Kui Xian.”
Kyuhyun choked, couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “What the hell?”
Zhou Mi just chuckled and shifted position, turning his back on Kyuhyun. “There are girls, and boys and a Kui Xian. That’s my awesome philosophy mixed with style. And, oh yeah, just wait and your precious internet-wife will be back in no time.” The man on the bed told before giggling at something he read and Kyuhyun just rolled his eyes and just went back to fixing the net, or do anything not related to Cosmopolitans and weird philosophies.
Before Kyuhyun could do a mental victory dance because finally - “yes, ABOUT TIME!” - the connection was back, his laptop made annoying alert sounds and some window popped out saying that a malware just entered his drive and was causing serious damage to his motherboard. Obviously, Mondays were not his days at all.
“WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!?” Kyuhyun yelled at his not-anymore ‘ol reliable laptop while Zhou Mi just yawned, not interested at the article he was reading and turned a page again. This time, the Chinaman made an “Ooh~” sound and pulled the magazine to his face.
“It says here that kissing can do a lot to you.” Zhou Mi began sharing, oblivious to Kyuhyun who was already at the verge of head-desking and/or destroying his gadget to bite-size pieces. “It says here that kissing washes bacteria off your teeth, which can help break down oral plaque.”
Kyuhyun’s mind stopped processing and looked at Zhou Mi like he never looked at him before. “WHAT?” Was he actually saying something as silly as this? Wait, was he actually listening too?
“... and during a really, really passionate kiss, you might lose two calories a minute - double your metabolic rate. Oh, so it’s like exercise! Only with the mouth. Wow, cool." Kyuhyun saw Zhou MI nodding like he was a scientist at discovery. And then Zhou Mi ended, “Kissing also relieves stress.”
It was then Zhou Mi made a paused and looked at Kyuhyun - his expression unreadable and all Kyuhyun could do was back away with his computer chair. He swallowed when the other inched closer. “W-what..?”
Zhou Mi just looked intently - really, really staring at him like Kyuhyun was some kind of a real-life painting. Or a specimen. With a tsk-ed, Zhou Mi finally said, “See? Pimples! Blemishes! Over because you don’t sleep so much, use less moisturizer and stress. Because you’re stressed, kiss me.”
The last one came out too slow to process and when it did, Kyuhyun turned beet red. “ZHOU MI!”
The Chinese member looked incredulous at Kyuhyun. “You’re not going to tell me to not do it because being the manly-man you are, you don’t kiss. Yeah, right, Kui Xian. Now hold still while we do this together. You can’t possibly do it alone, can you? C’mon, for five minutes? No, wait, make that ten. Passionate kiss, it says!”
Zhou Mi’s face was immediately met with Kyuhyun’s palm and wild heartbeats. “Why are you being like this?!”
There was no time for explanation when Zhou Mi simply tugged the hand and pulled Kyuhyun to him, teetering their fall towards the bed with chuckles and protests altogether. Kyuhyun was on him and was about to get off when Zhou Mi quickly trapped him with arms around his waist; their bodies pressed so close.
“Nothing much, just looking for a reason to kiss you out of the blue.” Zhou Mi was grinning below him and Kyuhyun was sure he’d be hitting Zhou Mi on the face if he won’t stop being a sap. “Besides, spend time with me, not with your internet-wife. I’m like your mistress, only sexier and with orange hair.”
“Oh, yeah? You spend so much time with shopping and NIVEA products!”
“Gotta keep up with the beauty times, Kui~” Zhou Mi grinned. “Can’t disappoint the fans, especially you. I need to seduce you away from the net.”
And with that, Zhou Mi’s hand at the back of his head pushed Kyuhyun’s face downwards to him and lips-met-lips in tingling lock. It started out as chaste that gradually turned lustful when tongues started swirling, tasting and slipping in and out and grunts to moan filling the once quiet room.
How Zhou Mi managed to roll them over, Kyuhyun hadn’t taken note and just felt the mattress under him and Zhou Mi hovering on him. His bed was never for two-person occupancy and his plush gift toys had taken room, Zhou Mi with him felt cramped and hot. Not that Kyuhyun was complaining because when a cold mouth began grazing over his chin, neck and collar and back to his lips for an even more heated kissing, everything felt just right.
Because Zhou Mi was the one who was doing it.
“Five minutes are up.” Zhou Mi reminded between their lip-locking, chuckling, and Kyuhyun just had that smug look on his face, rolling his eyes.
“Finish what you’ve started, concubine.” For good measure, Kyuhyun made sure to slowly knee and rub Zhou Mi over there and double made sure to hear Zhou Mi moan in pleasure.
Okay, so maybe Mondays weren’t his bad days at all, especially that Zhou Mi was making him feel so many physical and emotional gratifications and everything felt too hot to handle but when the door burst open with a Donghae and Eunhyuk screaming about their laptops having viruses then screaming once more about their now tainted innocence, Kyuhyun rethought.
This is so not my day.
Now located at the living room where everyone could watch them (because dorms rule: NO NAUGHTY-STUFF IN THE ROOMS! - Eeteuk), Zhou Mi sighed whilst reading the Cosmopolitan magazine again, turning another page out of boredom.
“Why, oh why do we keep on getting interrupted?”
Kyuhyun wondered too. He also wondered what to do about that stupid, virus-infected laptop of his.
--
A/N: As always, cracky fic is cracky. All I could do is this TEASE-FLUFF of fanfic sort. Not the smut thing. I KNOW I CAN, DAMMIT! I'mma feeling so QMi deprived lately. I need serious dosage here! Anyhow, comments and cookies are loved!
(and could someone please tell me if I'm rating this right. As I see it, this is R-ish? Or is there a rating next to PG-13?)
Pairing: QMi
Rating: R (for sexual situation)
Genre: Fluff, Romance, Comedy, Crack
Disclaimer: Not that I own the boys or anything but hey, I CAN DREAM, RIGHT? :D
Summary: The internet’s gone, the Trojan horse munchies his computer next and Zhou Mi’s rambling something about kisses. Kyuhyun’s annoyed, really, really annoyed. Or isn’t he?
--
It started with a ‘shit’ when the server wavered and that CONNECTION DISCONNECTED balloon popped out of his screen. No sooner than later, the laptop turned white with texts that said PAGE CANNOT BE DISPLAYED. Kyuhyun scowled and smashed the keyboard, swearing that every netizen in Korea was out to get his precious internet time when he was free of schedule.
This cannot be happening, Kyuhyun grumbled to himself, rewiring and checking his laptop for any misplaced connection or something and apparently, all was well and the internet was just being an idiot. What a perfect moment to get disconnected when he was pawning - and winning, mind you - gamers out there. What was he going to do now? Join Zhou Mi on his bed?
No, it wasn’t what you were thinking as much as you want it because Zhou Mi was too engrossed reading the latest Cosmopolitan issue and Kyuhyun couldn’t take it anymore and hit the bed-intruder with the nearest plush gift at hand.
“What is it this time?” Zhou Mi asked, not looking up from his magazine and merely ignored the scowl look on Kyuhyun’s face; the plush left unattended at his side.
“I got disconnected from the only world I know where I belong.”
“That’s wonderful, honey.” Zhou Mi said, obviously inattentive and turned a page, whistling happily when he reached the 2010 Best Branded Bag in Asia - his all-time favourite.
“Are you even listening? The internet’s suddenly gone and you’re going on about-” Kyuhyun peered over the magazine and grimaced. “-BAGS?! Why are you even reading that sissy thing!?”
“Well, excuse me, Mister I’m-too-manly-to-see-what’s-new-for-my-skin-and-health-care-products-and- fashion. This magazine helps and you’d know if you didn’t have pimples on your face or use Louis Vuitton man-purses.”
“WHAT?” It was all Kyuhyun could say before Zhou Mi properly propped himself on the bed and turned another page. He watched him doing so, catching the glimpse of the cover. “AND WHY WOMEN’S? Isn’t there like, MEN’S Cosmopolitan?”
Okay, where did that come from, Kyuhyun didn’t know.
And Zhou Mi made a face; his perfectly contoured face distorting. “And see tons of naked, buffy men? I don’t think so.”
“ But you like men, you liar.”
“I like girls, see?” Zhou Mi then raised the article and pointed some Western actress who Kyuhyun didn’t know. “ Ain’t she just pretty with that funky dress and volatized blonde hair? I like girls-“ Zhou Mi paused looking up in the air, as if contemplating and then adding as well, “- and a specie labelled as Kui Xian.”
Kyuhyun choked, couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “What the hell?”
Zhou Mi just chuckled and shifted position, turning his back on Kyuhyun. “There are girls, and boys and a Kui Xian. That’s my awesome philosophy mixed with style. And, oh yeah, just wait and your precious internet-wife will be back in no time.” The man on the bed told before giggling at something he read and Kyuhyun just rolled his eyes and just went back to fixing the net, or do anything not related to Cosmopolitans and weird philosophies.
Before Kyuhyun could do a mental victory dance because finally - “yes, ABOUT TIME!” - the connection was back, his laptop made annoying alert sounds and some window popped out saying that a malware just entered his drive and was causing serious damage to his motherboard. Obviously, Mondays were not his days at all.
“WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!?” Kyuhyun yelled at his not-anymore ‘ol reliable laptop while Zhou Mi just yawned, not interested at the article he was reading and turned a page again. This time, the Chinaman made an “Ooh~” sound and pulled the magazine to his face.
“It says here that kissing can do a lot to you.” Zhou Mi began sharing, oblivious to Kyuhyun who was already at the verge of head-desking and/or destroying his gadget to bite-size pieces. “It says here that kissing washes bacteria off your teeth, which can help break down oral plaque.”
Kyuhyun’s mind stopped processing and looked at Zhou Mi like he never looked at him before. “WHAT?” Was he actually saying something as silly as this? Wait, was he actually listening too?
“... and during a really, really passionate kiss, you might lose two calories a minute - double your metabolic rate. Oh, so it’s like exercise! Only with the mouth. Wow, cool." Kyuhyun saw Zhou MI nodding like he was a scientist at discovery. And then Zhou Mi ended, “Kissing also relieves stress.”
It was then Zhou Mi made a paused and looked at Kyuhyun - his expression unreadable and all Kyuhyun could do was back away with his computer chair. He swallowed when the other inched closer. “W-what..?”
Zhou Mi just looked intently - really, really staring at him like Kyuhyun was some kind of a real-life painting. Or a specimen. With a tsk-ed, Zhou Mi finally said, “See? Pimples! Blemishes! Over because you don’t sleep so much, use less moisturizer and stress. Because you’re stressed, kiss me.”
The last one came out too slow to process and when it did, Kyuhyun turned beet red. “ZHOU MI!”
The Chinese member looked incredulous at Kyuhyun. “You’re not going to tell me to not do it because being the manly-man you are, you don’t kiss. Yeah, right, Kui Xian. Now hold still while we do this together. You can’t possibly do it alone, can you? C’mon, for five minutes? No, wait, make that ten. Passionate kiss, it says!”
Zhou Mi’s face was immediately met with Kyuhyun’s palm and wild heartbeats. “Why are you being like this?!”
There was no time for explanation when Zhou Mi simply tugged the hand and pulled Kyuhyun to him, teetering their fall towards the bed with chuckles and protests altogether. Kyuhyun was on him and was about to get off when Zhou Mi quickly trapped him with arms around his waist; their bodies pressed so close.
“Nothing much, just looking for a reason to kiss you out of the blue.” Zhou Mi was grinning below him and Kyuhyun was sure he’d be hitting Zhou Mi on the face if he won’t stop being a sap. “Besides, spend time with me, not with your internet-wife. I’m like your mistress, only sexier and with orange hair.”
“Oh, yeah? You spend so much time with shopping and NIVEA products!”
“Gotta keep up with the beauty times, Kui~” Zhou Mi grinned. “Can’t disappoint the fans, especially you. I need to seduce you away from the net.”
And with that, Zhou Mi’s hand at the back of his head pushed Kyuhyun’s face downwards to him and lips-met-lips in tingling lock. It started out as chaste that gradually turned lustful when tongues started swirling, tasting and slipping in and out and grunts to moan filling the once quiet room.
How Zhou Mi managed to roll them over, Kyuhyun hadn’t taken note and just felt the mattress under him and Zhou Mi hovering on him. His bed was never for two-person occupancy and his plush gift toys had taken room, Zhou Mi with him felt cramped and hot. Not that Kyuhyun was complaining because when a cold mouth began grazing over his chin, neck and collar and back to his lips for an even more heated kissing, everything felt just right.
Because Zhou Mi was the one who was doing it.
“Five minutes are up.” Zhou Mi reminded between their lip-locking, chuckling, and Kyuhyun just had that smug look on his face, rolling his eyes.
“Finish what you’ve started, concubine.” For good measure, Kyuhyun made sure to slowly knee and rub Zhou Mi over there and double made sure to hear Zhou Mi moan in pleasure.
Okay, so maybe Mondays weren’t his bad days at all, especially that Zhou Mi was making him feel so many physical and emotional gratifications and everything felt too hot to handle but when the door burst open with a Donghae and Eunhyuk screaming about their laptops having viruses then screaming once more about their now tainted innocence, Kyuhyun rethought.
This is so not my day.
Now located at the living room where everyone could watch them (because dorms rule: NO NAUGHTY-STUFF IN THE ROOMS! - Eeteuk), Zhou Mi sighed whilst reading the Cosmopolitan magazine again, turning another page out of boredom.
“Why, oh why do we keep on getting interrupted?”
Kyuhyun wondered too. He also wondered what to do about that stupid, virus-infected laptop of his.
--
A/N: As always, cracky fic is cracky. All I could do is this TEASE-FLUFF of fanfic sort. Not the smut thing. I KNOW I CAN, DAMMIT! I'mma feeling so QMi deprived lately. I need serious dosage here! Anyhow, comments and cookies are loved!
(and could someone please tell me if I'm rating this right. As I see it, this is R-ish? Or is there a rating next to PG-13?)