Good reminder...thanks!lady_annikaMarch 3 2009, 23:21:40 UTC
I'm sorry to hear that you've had some trouble. Though I love your sense of humour, I also think you're outgoing and interesting and dedicated to the game. I know you're not here fishing for compliments, but I really think you should know how I personaly perceive you. I think people tease you because they genuinely love you...having said that, it should never go too far. There's a solid line between teasing and being an ass to someone.
Thank you for posting about this. One thing that's too often true is that once branded in one way, it's nearly impossible to change yourself (even if you've long ago changed). I know many people in the SCA who are still living down reputations they made for themselves 20 years ago when they were just barely out of high school. And they're so different now, as we all are after a decade or two of growth. It's sad how hard it is to change that because people can be blind and assuming.
I shall take this as a good reminder to revisit my opinions of people, wherever I have them :)
Seth, it is not Ok, to make someone feel uncomfortable, put down or any other way used - because 'used' it was all those things really are. They have used your play to in some odd way make themselves feel bigger or better about themselves. It actually has little to do with you. And yes- Make a scene. Next time stop, mid sentance, mid stride and say "excuse me???" and just stand there and let them explain.
Uh, so what if you're goofy and having fun? People shouldn't talk down to you or disrespect you because of that or because they know you'll laugh it off. You did good to call them on it when it happened again. Keep doing it and know that your friends will stick up for you if they see someone trying to take advantage of your good nature.
It's not that I am upset or pissed off...I am just tired of being the butt end of everyones jokes and jabs. and yes I do it too, but alot less then I used to for I know how much it sucks, and hopefully one day I can stop all together...
I think it comes down to some people thinking 'SCA' time and not real time. You've changed so much in the time I've known you, but I don't think of our time together in terms of 'events' or the SCA. I've found the same problems myself with people who try to treat me like a kid or something...and I get really pissed.
I'd say talk to the folks who were joking around and say 'OK I've had enough'.
WTF? 2 "influential" people humiliated you because they think you would be a good sport about it? Joking around between a couple friends is one thing. Trying to humiliate someone to make yourself feel big is quite another. Personally I would have taken these people aside and had a talk with them. I didn't hear these incidents but the fact that they made you unhappy tells me that they were serious enough that you need to address them. It's true respect is something you earn but standing up for yourself is part of that. sometimes you do have to say "Fuck You" when someone shits on you.
I had people say the same thing to me. I just changed how I reacted to things. If they do it stop being a 'good sport' and they will move on.
Having said that, posting it on LJ may mean quite a few will cease all jibes completely lest they think they are partially responsible now that you have aired your concern.
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Thank you for posting about this. One thing that's too often true is that once branded in one way, it's nearly impossible to change yourself (even if you've long ago changed). I know many people in the SCA who are still living down reputations they made for themselves 20 years ago when they were just barely out of high school. And they're so different now, as we all are after a decade or two of growth. It's sad how hard it is to change that because people can be blind and assuming.
I shall take this as a good reminder to revisit my opinions of people, wherever I have them :)
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It actually has little to do with you. And yes- Make a scene. Next time stop, mid sentance, mid stride and say "excuse me???"
and just stand there and let them explain.
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I'd say talk to the folks who were joking around and say 'OK I've had enough'.
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Having said that, posting it on LJ may mean quite a few will cease all jibes completely lest they think they are partially responsible now that you have aired your concern.
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