I'm not participating at all in the VVC discussion for a variety of reasons, and I'm mainly just sad that I see so many people I care about so upset, and/or putting so much energy into something and getting so much negativity in return.
But I wanted to thank you for the words about compromise. Because I'm a person who by nature tends to always see both sides, or shades of grey, on issues, and it often drives me crazy that I'm that way. And there's not much of a premium put on those things in today's world, when so many things boil down to soundbites and absolutes.
As usual, I lurk very much on the fringes of these debates, reading in interest but not feeling like I have the knowledge or the right to participate (in this case, not a fic writer or vidder or VVC attendee).
But I've also been noticing who's been able to compromise, to acknowledge the value in all sides, to try to build something out of the flames of extreme arguments.
And I don't think there's anything more valuable than the art of compromise, nor anything so devalued by those who cling fiercely to their one true belief.
Longwinded way of saying that, as you so often do, you've said something I agree with and echo.
I'm kind of worried that I crossed a line talking about the breasts, because I tend to do something and not realize I'm doing it, which is assume the internal logic of the more strident party and then try to argue against it from inside the same headspace. (See for example: the time I got in trouble with all my friends for arguing with a self-declared fascist that the problem in the short term was that you were going to run up a huge fiscal deficit constantly training new train conductors.) I do want to apologize, not self-justify, if I crossed that line and was a jerk.
I know I'm not the type of person being referred to here as I don't think anyone considers me a part of this community, however, for what it's worth...
Compromise is created on the backs of those who can stand to be the enemies of both sides. They pretty much get screwed, let's not pretend they don't; they do it anyway, God knows why.
Because we're idiots.
Because we recognize that for a person to request an accommodation for their own needs is also a request to impose on others needs.
Because the stuff being complained about here can be dealt with using a modicum of common sense and people being realistic.
Transgendered bathrooms? If the con takes over the hotel, designate a bathroom as transgendered and slap a sign on the door. If the con can't do that, I've yet to see a con suite that doesn't have a private bathroom
( ... )
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But I wanted to thank you for the words about compromise. Because I'm a person who by nature tends to always see both sides, or shades of grey, on issues, and it often drives me crazy that I'm that way. And there's not much of a premium put on those things in today's world, when so many things boil down to soundbites and absolutes.
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*sends hugs*
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No, I think the hugs are for you. People who take a role in things like this... there's a special place in fandom heaven for them, you know? <333
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But I've also been noticing who's been able to compromise, to acknowledge the value in all sides, to try to build something out of the flames of extreme arguments.
And I don't think there's anything more valuable than the art of compromise, nor anything so devalued by those who cling fiercely to their one true belief.
Longwinded way of saying that, as you so often do, you've said something I agree with and echo.
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is that some sort of recent US concept or idea??
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Compromise is created on the backs of those who can stand to be the enemies of both sides. They pretty much get screwed, let's not pretend they don't; they do it anyway, God knows why.
Because we're idiots.
Because we recognize that for a person to request an accommodation for their own needs is also a request to impose on others needs.
Because the stuff being complained about here can be dealt with using a modicum of common sense and people being realistic.
Transgendered bathrooms? If the con takes over the hotel, designate a bathroom as transgendered and slap a sign on the door. If the con can't do that, I've yet to see a con suite that doesn't have a private bathroom ( ... )
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