Comments | selkie_queen: Just a Sip

selkie_queen

Just a Sip

Mar 08, 2009 23:10

( Just a Sip )

vampire, original story, gwendolyn, anselm

Comments 7

aisling87 March 16 2009, 05:25:37 UTC

Wow, what a plot twist! A very creative take on the prompt! Well done. :)

selkie_queen March 16 2009, 20:23:22 UTC

Thanks, I actually tried writing a very different entry, but it just wouldn't work. Anselm is a very demanding character in my mind, he wants his story told and he's been bugging me for a while, but I couldn't come up with a plot for him. Gwendolyn and Anselm have several others in their group, but this is an edited version of how Anselm and Gwendolyn met.

cedarwolfsinger March 16 2009, 17:13:50 UTC

Well, you certainly gave us something unexpected! Good luck with it!

selkie_queen March 16 2009, 20:23:51 UTC

Thanks, Anselm demanded a story, I though of him weeks ago and he wanted his due. He's a very immature vampire.

drippedonpaper March 16 2009, 19:58:03 UTC

Just one little note, in this sentence:

My father had owned a manor with several surfs, the Lord often came to check up on us and I had often played with the twins, my older brothers were too old and had work to do while my younger brothers were too young to be much fun.

I think you meant SERFS not Surfs.

Well, you really threw me for a loop with the vampires becoming part of the plot like that! I think it's a sign of good writing if you can surprise your reader, it's definitely a skill I need to develop more.

I really like the way you bring out the reasons behind many wedding traditions.

I am curious, do you know historically whether twins truly were branded in history? It makes sense in a way perhaps (though seems cruel) but it wasn't something I had considered so it was interesting.

drippedonpaper March 16 2009, 20:01:47 UTC

I also like the fact that it took a woman to kill the vampire:)

I thought her awakening was rather amusing, with the other surprises, starting off with a black snout made me wonder where the story was going now:)

Will this become a book? Do you always use the same characters for the month for Brigit's Flame? (I can't remember)

That's probably a good idea, a way to develop them more.

Do keep writing!

selkie_queen March 16 2009, 20:32:16 UTC

Thanks for the typo spot, I'm a terrible speller and all bad spellers know that spellcheck is not as helpful as one would think ( ... )