one More Night, Cam/Vala, NC-17, SG-1 - Part 4

[virkatjol]

Part 4



They come in caravans, setting up camp just outside of town. There are almost two dozen people, more men than women, but some children, too.

They come into town the first night for the feast everyone has been preparing for. There's no business the first night, only celebration, and it grates on Cam that he has to wait to ask but they've been well versed in the proper etiquette.

Vala's trying to get him to relax. He's well aware that she keeps pushing drinks into his hand, and she stays by his side. He thinks of what she's said earlier, that they're lucky to be here, and comes to the conclusion that if they're only here another day, he might as well try to enjoy it.

So he drinks whatever she foists upon him and the tension starts to melt and twist away. She sticks close by, cuddling against him and then into him when he slides an arm over her shoulders. She's wearing a pretty dress, sewn by someone else but dyed by Vala herself. She's the most colorful thing out here, pink and purple swirling on the fabric, gloss on her lips and hair smelling like flowers.

It's only when he stands to go get more punch (Vala's request) and the world tilts a little that he thinks he may have had too much. But then warm arms slide around his waist and he's being hugged from behind and it's nice. He covers her arm with his own and squeezes her hand briefly. "Yeah?"

"Cake, too," she leans up to whisper in his ear. "Pleaaaase?"

"No pie?" He teases.

"Pie later. Cake now." She hugs him again, a burst of pressure around him, and then slips back away. He heads to where the food is piled on long tables and gets more; two kinds of cake, fruit, more of the delicious and deceptive drink.

She's wandered off to talk to someone else so he sits down and puts the plate on the seat beside him. There are benches all over, low to the ground and carved from fallen trees. Cam kind of likes them, thinks his father would; they look rustic but they're surprisingly comfortable, room for three or four on some but only two on the one they've chosen.

He doesn't bother looking for Vala. She'll come back for the cake and the drink soon enough.

She spends time mingling. Not technically talking trade, but showing off the wares she can produce just by sparkling in their presence. Compliments aren't new to her and she knows how to take them and make it look like she's shy and innocent. The men like that, she's come to expect certain reactions from them all and rarely is she disappointed. They flirt, provincially, but she can still recognize it and she eats it up. It's so easy on this planet. She grins as someone offers her a drink. She looks over at Cam before taking it and sees him staring at her. His eyes are unreadable from the distance but the fire flickers in the deep black of his pupils.

"No, thanks." She winks and heads over to her man. The one that's been assigned to her by fate and circumstance. She bites her lower lip as she approaches and gives a half smile. She thinks about any other member of the team. How it would be here with them and she knows this is the only thing that's just right. "I came to drink my punch and eat my cake..."

He holds the plate for her as she settles back in. "You doing business on a night for pleasure only?" He hands her the cake and she takes a generous bite. Her moan of delight sends shivers down his spine and it must be obvious because of the look on her face. That predatory, no one can stop me, look that he shouldn't know about. But he does and... He likes it.

"Business... Pleasure... All the same when you do it right." She eats some more. "This is really good." Her fork portions another piece and she holds it up to him. Cam takes it, closing his eyes and letting the sensation of the sugary cake mix with the heady buzz from the alcohol.

He just nods after he swallows and slowly opens his eyes. Her face is perfection, so soft looking, so pale. "I'm going to have a headache tomorrow." He's surprised he's still coherent enough to know that.

"Nu-uh. Just chew a bit of that root before bed. Works for hangover prevention as well." She feels a lock of hair slip over her face and before she can shake it away his fingers are brushing along her temple to put it back. "Thanks."

"What if there's no gate?" Drunk and scared. What a great combo...

"Thought that wasn't an option." She just feeds him more cake.

Cam shrugs. "Wasn't before but tonight I feel different."

"You feel drunk."

"'S not that..." He pouts and she giggles at him which turns his frown into a grumpier one. "It's not!"

"It's not huh?" Does she want to know? "What is it then?" In for a nickel, or whatever Earth currency you go in for, in for a pound.

He scrunches his forehead and stares into the high flames of the fire. "Dunno."

"You just don't want to tell me."

He hums a bit, sort of to himself, before sighing. "Nope."

"Then what do you want?" For a moment the rest of the crowd fades away and it's just the two of them, her voice soft and sweet in his ear.

She tastes like cake.

Vala tastes like cake.

And Cam knows this, because he's kissing her. Because she asked what he wanted and suddenly he knew, and he was leaning forward, just taking it without stopping to think about it.

His tongue swipes over her lower lip and it's a surprise to both of them that he's the one deepening the kiss but she's ready, eager and opening to his advances. She fumbles the plate down onto the ground, letting it fall the last couple of inches without caring, and lazily puts her arms over his shoulders. It's not a tight embrace but it anchors them together and Cam likes it. He likes everything about this, the smooth enamel of her teeth and the way her tongue slides along his and the hitch in her breath.

He isn't even the one that pulls away. That's her, because as nice as this is she knows that it's more desperation than desire right now. He wants her, absolutely - but he's not ready to give up yet and she might not have any hope for herself but she has hope that he'll get what he needs, this way home. And if he does (if they do) then this will have been a mistake.

Vala's impatient, but she's not stupid. She can wait a few more days for this. She thinks they won't find a Stargate, and she knows if they don't that he'll fall apart, and she needs him to not be angry at her when he does. She needs to be stronger for him, though she'd never say that to him, knowing how it would just add to the injury.

She eases out of it, though. She doesn't want this to be a rejection. She presses soft little kisses to his lips and she smiles, keeps smiling, smiles and looks him right in the eye and touches her hand to his face (warm skin, stubble, oh god) and then reaches up to caress her fingers through his hair. He dips into the touch like a puppy wanting to be petted.

"I want that, too," she whispers.

"You do?" He knows that she desires him, likes sex, wants to get more physical. But just kisses, does she want those?

"Mmm." She mumbles and kisses his chin before standing and stretching. "You should go mingle more."

Cam reaches for her hand as it falls to her side, plays with the tips of her fingers. "Don't wanna talk to anyone else."

His words are slurring and maybe it's best if she takes him home. "I'll go make our excuses and we can go home."

"To bed..." He drags her fingers to his lips and kisses the tips, licking lightly over her pointer.

Vala leans closer to his ear, places a soft kiss right in front of it, and whispers, "Yes, to sleep." She laughs at his grumble. "Big day tomorrow."

"Want you."

She really doesn't want to insult him but she having to be the responsible one is a role reversal she's not sure that she's ready to handle. "It's best to let it simmer..."

"Minx." He stands, not relinquishing her hand, linking their fingers more, grounding himself as his palm flattens against hers. "I'll say goodbye to everyone with you."

They make their way around and after a short amount of time Vala is leading them both back to their house. It's hard to see, darkness coats the road and the fire behind them makes vision even more difficult. He moves her closer and loops his arm around her shoulder, not releasing her hand. The side of his palm presses into the fleshy beginnings of her breast and it makes him moan, but he manages to lock most of the sound in his throat.

How did this just happen so fast. Days and weeks of her pushing and teasing and... just being Vala. Their house outline appears under the pale moonlight and he stops her at the tree in the front yard, presses her back into the bark and kisses her again. She said no to not sleeping and for some reason kissing her outside makes more sense. Like as soon as they go back in it's not allowed.

His fingers weave through her hair and he can feel her smile beneath his mouth as their lips lock. She's so soft, so delicious, so... so Vala. And he loves it. How does one small woman feel so perfect in his arms. He's sure it's not the alcohol. All that did was give him permission to do this.

Cam's tongue laps at hers and she's giggling and holding his hip bones, rubbing her thumbs along the dips of the muscle. He feels amazing. Just what she's been craving. Physical touch, mouth to mouth, body to body. Sleeping together has been good, for both of them, but the intimacy was something she was missing, needing.

"Cameron..." She murmurs his name against his mouth. "We should go sleep..." It's hard to tell him but this can't go any further.

"Don't wanna." His mouth seals over hers again. He kisses her until they can't breath. "Just wanna do this..."

She really hadn't meant to let this keep going once they got home, but it's so hard to resist.

Luckily fate, too much alcohol, and too long a day have taken a toll of him. It's a yawn that breaks the kiss for her. She presses her face to his shoulder so he can't see the smile and then pulls away. "You're tired."

His eyes go too-wide and he shakes his head. "Not that sleepy."

She laughs. "Yes, that sleepy. Go - go get into bed, wait for me. I'll just put out the candles and get some water for us."

He drops down into bed and she can see from the droop of his eyes that he'll be asleep soon. She dawdles in the kitchen on purpose, goes out and gets water and some of the healing root that they'll probably both need in the morning, and then just sits there for a few minutes thinking, replaying the kisses in her mind.

She's known for a while that he's attracted to her, but knowing it and feeling it are two entirely different things. She shivers a little remembering the warmth of the kisses, slightly sloppy but she's willing to mark that one up to the alcohol because even the drunken making out ranks up there in the top ten.

Just as she'd expected, he's fast asleep when she goes back into the bedroom... but it doesn't stop her from leaning down to brush a kiss over his lips before she gets in beside him.

*

Cam wakes up with a pounding headache, and a very spotty recollection of the night before. "Shit," he grumbles. He can tell that it's mid-morning, much later than he'd normally sleep in, but neither he nor Vala are expected to attend to their responsibilities today. Work is suspended except for a skeleton crew to make sure things are watered and nothing catastrophic happens, so people can trade and enjoy the company and get letters and gossip from villages that are too far to visit often.

Vala's made breakfast. He can smell it and he's caught between his stomach turning and growling, somehow. He glances beside him and sees the tin cup of water and the root with a little note on it that says "chew me!" in Vala's handwriting.

He does both, and rolls back over to sleep for a few more minutes. Once the root starts to take effect (so much faster than headache pills back on earth... that's one thing he'll miss) he manages to pry himself out of bed.

"I've heated water," Vala calls out when she hears him moving around.

He grunts a thanks at her and by the time he's out of the bath, he feels human again.

"Food." She glances up and smiles, then points at the plate across the table. "Then we can go."

He nods, not smiling back. Some time between the fourth and fifth bites, he remembers kissing her. His eyes jerk up sharply but she doesn't notice, or doesn't let on that she does.

He struggles to remember if they'd done anything else, but can't. He thinks about asking, but he's not sure he wants to know the answer. He takes another bite, chews and swallows methodically. When he's done, he puts his fork down and says, "Let's go."

Suddenly, he just wants this over.

"You should finish eating." She reaches and grabs one of this strips of bacon type meat. "I'll help a little." Vala can tell he's anxious. She's not sure if it's because of last night or because of the Stargate. She hopes it's the latter. As much as she wants to kiss him again now she'll hold off.

"I-" Cutting himself off he resumes eating. With all the trouble she goes through making meals for them the least he could do is finish it. It doesn't take much longer before they're both done. Food and juice consumed and dishes washed. "Now?"

She nods, a secret smile on her face. "You're cute when you're all nervous."

"I'm not nervous."

"Okay." She laughs and bumps her shoulder against his as they walk down the path from their house to the village square.

He is, but no way is he saying it out loud. That will just make it worse. "There are six of them. We can each talk to three of them."

She hums at that and stops and turns to him. "You don't just want to talk to all of them together?" Personally she thinks that's better. For both of their sanity. She's not expecting anything positive and it's going to crush him.

"I just want to be done. To know or not know..." He grabs the edge of her hand with his fingers, rubbing his thumb along hers. "This limbo is killing me." Wanting her is killing him. He realizes he's touching her and drops her hand. It was so easy, so natural, that he just did it.

"It won't take that long and I'd rather not split up..." For him, she wants to be there for him.

Something in her face makes him change his mind. "If you want that..."

"I do."

Cam grins, nods and turns to keep walking. "Alright then." He thinks it's sweet that she needs him with her.

The messengers all have stations of sort. Nothing so specific but just general areas that they stick to so people know what region they are from. Cam heads to the one on the far left first and brings Vala with him. It doesn't take long to get to him despite the number of people milling around. He's very nice and while they explain the Stargate to him he listens intently, trying to piece it together but keeps shaking his head.

Vala watches his face fall as nothing triggers his memory. She rubs his back, between his shoulder blades and gives him a sweet smile. "There are still five more." She's glad Cam is looking at her and not the messenger when he says that because the look on that man's face tells her exactly what they are going to find from the last of them. And it's not good.

They go through the same thing five more times.

Five more shaking heads and muttered 'no's.

Cam's posture doesn't change, his expression says set in grim realization. She's not entirely sure that he's actually processing the news that there's no Stargate on this planet, though he has to realize how slim the odds are. Even out of planets with breathable air and suitable habitat, the Ancients couldn't visit every one... and some of the ones they did put a Stargate on have been destroyed through centuries of war, demolition and rebuilding.

Vala herself has been responsible for removing a few from worlds, as Qetesh. She feels a stab of regret, even though it means nothing to them right now.

She reaches down and tries to thread her fingers through his but he jerks his hand away.

"I'm going back to the house," he says, steps quickening.

Vala has things to trade, still - things to get for them, for their house. She wants new blankets, maybe a couple of pillows she can make into cushions... just in case Cameron decides to go back to sleeping on the couch.

She hopes that won't happen.

*

Back at the house - he can't quite bring himself to think of it as home right now - Cam sits at the table and just stares.

He thinks until he just doesn't want to think anymore and get changed into his work clothes and goes out to the field. Right now he just wants something to do.

*

Vala has to make three trips back to the house with her haul. She's done spectacularly, her makeups and perfumes and hair treatments grabbed up by the merchants hands as they'd marveled over new and exotic merchandise. She's kept to herself how to make them, for now, thinking there's more to gain from the trading than the knowledge.

At the end of the day their cabinets are full of new fruit, fluffy loaves of bread and grains and spices and stocks for future meals. She's been indulgent without Cam to temper her choices, and there's a pretty painting to go on the wall and nice curtains and cloth to make the cushions that she'd wanted.

She's bought clothing for him, too - pants and a shirt in a dark green that look like BDUs. At the moment she'd been happy but now she's not sure that it's a good choice. She puts them under some of the extra bedding in a box and slides it under the bed.

There are some gems that she manages to trade for, she'll make her own jewelry. She gets them a few chickens and a rooster for eggs and more chicks and even convinces one of the messengers to build the pen with supplies she's bartered for in exchange for more of her hair products. Apparently he has a wife.

It doesn't take long and he fashions one for the goats in no time as well. Perhaps doing this your whole life makes it all less overwhelming an easier. More people come and help and when Cam walks back to get some lunch she just waves her fingers and grins. But he doesn't smile back. In fact he turns on his heel and stomps off. She's unsure as to why but she's got a good idea. Jealousy being top among the list. She lets him go, not wanting to indulge him in such silly notions.

While they work Vala heads back to town for one last look around. She gets a hot pocket sandwich and water to munch on as she browses. She has a bit of supplies left and ends up trading for more ingredients. Next time they come it will be better. Everyone tells her that word will spread and the demands will be high. Tomorrow the men will be around still but it is the last day before they go on to the next village or home, depending on their route. One of the men from their town is packed to head with them and she feels for his wife and three children. Of course everyone will help them and Vala slips a small vial of perfume, the one she likes to call love potion, into the woman's hand before she heads home. She's given the man a list of things that might help with coloring her products or adding scents to them to take with him as well as things to trade for it. He'll have his pack animals with him to bear most of the burden so she doesn't feel bad about asking.

She waves to them all as she leaves. The sun is threatening to go to bed, it's hanging low and large at the horizon. There is may an hour or two left of light. She hopes that Cam is home. That he got something to eat and that he'll let her help him.

Comfort him.

Anything, as long as she doesn't get shut out. As much as she hates to admit it, she needs him. She's come to rely on him. His humor, his voice, his touch, his steadiness. Everything about him makes this feel more and more like a home every day. She wants to be that for him, too. If only he'd allow it.

*

He is back at home when she gets there. At a loss for what else to do, he's been cleaning out the rubbish left from their new fencing and trying to work his way around the chickens and goats. He'd even done some milking since they'd been running low on it, and he likes having milk in the morning.

He tries his best not to think that he should get used to this, because it's probably his life now. He shoves that deeper down inside, buries it even more, hopes for and gets the numbness that helps close his mind off.

He's even got dinner cooking when Vala gets home.

"Ooh, I'm impressed," Vala says, walking in. "It smells lovely."

"Just a couple of those birds," Cam says.

"They taste like chicken." Vala flashes a grin at him, because it's the same joke they'd made a few days before but Cam doesn't laugh this time. Her smile dims but only briefly. "I got lots of things for us."

"I saw." Cam's voice is clipped, short. "Used some of those spices on it."

"Oh! Yay!" She claps her hands. "I bet it's delicious. Did you make potatoes, too?"

"Yep." He'd cut up some in chunks and made home fries. They need salt, but they're not bad in a pinch and Vala loves them.

When the food is done he dumps it haphazardly onto two plates and slides one across the table to her.

"Thank you," she says. She waits until he sits to start to eat. "I got us wine. A few bottles. And beer! I put them outside in the cooler."

"Wine?" He feels a little annoyed that she'd waste the chance to get useful supplies on it, but maybe that's what he gets for leaving the shopping up to her. He really hadn't thought it would matter.

"I thought you'd be pleased..." Her lips turn down slightly and she attempts to hide her frown with a forkful of potatoes.

Cam barks at her, not a laugh but almost one at the same time. "Why would I be pleased that you waste our trading supplies on alcohol?" He can feel the rage boiling over and he grips the edge of the table. "You couldn't find anything better to get? Grains? Seeds? Vegetables..." He forces himself to calm down, wiping his palms across his face trying to shake himself out of this funk.

"I got all that too, Cameron." Vala's worried now. Even more so than she was when he stormed off. "It's quite amazing what my silly little things go for. Everyone just said wait until next time. I'm going to have to make a lot more."

"How nice for you!" Cam can't stop the bitterness from coating his words. She's making a life here. She's fitting in. She's the one they all like. All her, always her. He's not needed. Starting over again. One step, hell, five steps behind. Just like when they surprised him with taking over SG1. He always wanted to know why it wasn't Sam. Why him? It's like the Air Force just wanted to throw another uphill battle in front of him. Relearning to walk wasn't enough. Take over this team, learn that Aliens exist, gate to other planets, and look like a damn fool. He was tired of being everyone's fool. Tired of being the one doing the catch up. Just, he was just tired...

Vala's silent, watching him for awhile, not know what to say. Or if to say anything. The food is good and she wants to tell him that but not at the expense of him shouting at her. She's spent a lot of her life being yelled at and he's got no reason to do it to her too. So she lets him have his temper tantrum. She knows it was a rough day. Finding out you might never get to go home sucks. It really does, even if your home was shit, like hers, it's still your home.

"Vala..." Her name is like a whisper across the small table. "I just..." He can feel himself crumbling and he doesn't know how to keep it together. "I just want-"

"We will." It helps, maybe if she doesn't make him say it. "We will." It comes out even firmer the second time.

"No...."

She can't take the way his voice cracks, the way his arms fall to the table in defeat. She's kneeling by his side, clasping one of his hands between hers. "Yes." She brings his knuckles to her cheek and leans into it. It's strange when she realizes that she actually needs this too. He needs her. She can see it when she looks at him. In all her life Vala is sure no one has needed her like this. "I don't know when or even how... but, we will."

He feels intensely comfortable, like the way she's looking at him right now she can just read every feeling that he has, every little crack in his armor, every tiny bit of vulnerability - and she might be right, what she's thinking - saying - but he's not ready to face it yet.

So he pulls himself together. He looks away from her, needs a bit of distance because falling apart is what he wants to do but he can't do it in front of her. That's not what he wants her to think of when she looks at him.

She rocks back on her heels and lets her hands fall away. She's no stranger to the need to take care of oneself, the need to protect how you feel. It stings a little that he feels like he needs to protect himself in front of her but she's not one to judge.

"Are you finished eating?" She asks.

He nods.

"I'll take the plates, then."

She takes them into the kitchen, running cool water into the basin and methodically scrubbing everything clean. When she's done she still hears no sound from the next room so she starts to clean the counters. She's halfway through the last one when she hears footsteps. "Come to bed. You gotta be tired."

He sounds more tired than she feels, but he's right. It's been a long day, bustling and full of activity and the thought of just crawling under the covers - with him - sounds perfect. She turns slowly, though. "Should I sleep out here?"

It's the first time she's ever offered that, and it clearly throws him. He hesitates and then shakes his head. "No."

She risks a smile and he doesn't return it but he doesn't scowl at her or make a comment, either. She hangs the damp cleaning cloth across the bar over the window and dries her hands on her skirt.

They follow the same routines they've cultivated over the weeks for bedtime; changing in the bathroom, taking turns. She leaves the door open, like she always does, and he carefully avoids being in any sort of position that would grant him a view. He closes it tightly when he changes and she usually calls out flirtatious comments from the other side but tonight she just asks him if he wants to try the new blankets she'd gotten.

He mumbles back something that sounds like 'don't care' so she changes the bedding. The new blanket is softer, made from different material than the one they'd been handed out of charity when they'd moved in. She sighs and rubs her cheek against it. It feels luxurious, even.

Cam doesn't comment on it when he gets into bed. She's a bit disappointed, but keeps that to herself, too.

Neither of them sleep for a while but eventually she hears his breathing start to even out. Her eyes pop open and she looks at him - strong jaw, soft mouth, eyes closed... she feels a tug of affection, of maybe something more, and smiles. He'll get some rest tonight and maybe tomorrow will be a new day.

The morning sun wakes him, bright and too happily sunny in his face. He yawns and stretches in place. Vala is curled up next to him, her breath wafts across his shoulder, she makes a little grunt as she cuddles in closer. He wants to be more for her. But right now he just... can't... He has to figure out how to live here. How to make something of himself here. He lets his fingers trace her bicep. The hair is so light and soft and her skin is like silk.

He's already hard and he snaps his hand away and rolls out of bed. The bathroom is his sanctuary these days. He lets himself lean against the door. Every morning he wakes up, she's there, in his arms or he's behind her or she's laying on him. And every morning he wakes up hard. His cock throbbing and needy. Sometimes a cold bath, wakes him up and settles his ardor. But some mornings he comes in here and leans against the door, just like now, drops his shorts and takes himself in hand. He looks down at his erection and gently palms it. Soft, slow strokes, tugging base to tip then letting his hand slide back down and repeating. He starts today but it just makes hims angry.

Will this be his life now? Sleeping with Vala, waking up and masturbating in the bathroom? It's frustrating and he grunts as he grips himself too hard in rage. That makes him even crankier and he starts the bath water - ice cold. He gets in before it's done filling and yelps in shock.

There's a knock. "Cam, you okay?" He can hear her yawn and feels bad for waking her.

"Fine." He's short but he can't help it. He's going to have to make up his mind. Does he want to keep her at arms length or does he want her? Before there was a point to not taking her. They were going home. They would be back to work and he didn't want to run their working relationship, and more importantly their friendship, with sex. But now.... Now, it's like there. She's available, she wants him, he wants her. There's no reason why they shouldn't now.

Is there?

He starts to scrub himself. He's rough and fast and he can see the red irritation show up behind the sponge. For some reason he feels dirty, like he's taking advantage of her by coming in here and, well, coming. It's like he's betraying her even though he guesses that she's not being chaste either. He's never seen her but sometimes he's come into the bedroom and thought he smelled a faint odor of female arousal. A little spice and heat in the air. The next morning he'd always woken especially hard after those nights. Even now just remembering it is nulling the effect of the chilled water.

"Fuck it." He mumbles to himself as he takes his cock in hand. It's fast and effective. He knows everything that gets him there and really all he has to do is close his eyes and imagine her on their bed with her fingers buried inside her, other hand working her clit while she bucks up and grunts her satisfaction. He thinks about how she feels clamping around her own fingers, how wet she is, how she smells and tastes. He's spilling his seed in moments and it would be embarrassing if it wasn't so efficient.

It doesn't take long to finish up, cleaning everything and drying off. She's sitting on the bed in her robe when he goes back out. "Water was cold." He gives a lame explanation, which is true but still feels like lying because he's just covering up what he really wants to say.

"Gotta make sure not to get frostbite." She tries to joke but knows that he's not giving her everything. She won't push yet. Vala respects his decision to not talk about it. For now.

*

A few days go by. Normality settles around them, oddly refreshing to Vala and suffocating to Cam.

It wouldn't be so bad, he thinks, if he didn't sort of like it here. He feels accomplished working with his hands, knowing that the food he grows during the day is what feeds them at night. He gets asked on a hunting trip and Vala's still better at it than he is but he does okay, with the right equipment and men that know the area. They end up with a share of the game and meat that they can treat and store and use for soups for a couple of weeks.

"You need a hobby," Vala announces. "I got you some things."

Cam is immediately wary. He has no idea what Vala's concept of 'hobby' actually is. He's almost relieved when she pulls out a block of wood and an intricate tool. "Uh... what is it?"

"Wood carving," she promptly responds. "I thought you could make things. Little.. knick knacks, and such. Or maybe cases for my makeups, then I could charge more for them!"

She sounds excited. Cam really has no interest in learning how to do anything - the only thing he's been doing is tracking star charts. He's not sure it will ever make a difference, nothing in this area is familiar... he's not going to magically chart out the way home, but it feels almost productive.

She's gone to the trouble of getting him supplies, though, so he takes them. He tells himself that he'll do it a couple of times where she can see and then maybe she'll forget about it.

Instead he actually finds it a little bit comforting. There's monotony but he feels more calm with his fingers busy. He does exactly what Vala had asked - makes little cases for her own creations. His first few are plain but he gets braver when they turn out okay and begins to carve designs into the top.

Vala's pleased with the fact that she's found something for him to do besides exhaust himself with work and then pass out in bed.

Cam's work is a hit. The first time she brings the new things in for trade they end up with even more chickens, feed for them, a pig quarter and baking supplies.

"We're a great team." Vala settles down to dinner as Cam finishes cooking it. She goes in to do all the trading during market day and he spends time at home. "I sold more than ever and the lipstick cake container was the best seller. Especially the ones with those lips carved into them. The two latches on the lid was brilliant."

He just smiles as she babbles on, watching, observing. "You're happy, aren't you?"

At first she's confused but then she understands he actually wants to know. "I am." His face falls a bit and she doesn't know how to justify herself. "We're making a good life here. One that we can be proud of. There has to be more than one version of events that allows you to find happiness, Cam. Not just the path at the SGC."

"It's all I've ever known. The Air Force. All I wanted. Now it's gone."

"No, no, not gone." She gets up and stands in front of him, rubbing the sides of his arms. "You still have your values, your training, one of your teammates..." She hopes that gives him a little comfort. He surprises her by pulling her into a hug. It's tight and sure.

Cam rubs his cheek against the top of her head. "I liked how things were."

"We can make it good here too." She hesitates a moments before adding, "Everything? You like how everything was?"

There's no question what she's hinting at and they've still sort of left everything around them hanging. "Maybe not everything. But even those things are still rocky, slippery in my fingers."

"Slippery, hmm?" She pulls back a bit to look up at him. "Well, life sometimes is."

He laughs. "Guess I can't argue with that."

"No, you can't. Or me. You can't argue with me. Remember that." She snuggles back into him, happy to soak in the affection. "But you can kiss me again, if you'd like."

Again.

This is the first time either of them have really acknowledged that they'd kissed. He fights back the urge to retreat from her and instead presses a kiss to her forehead. Her arms tighten around him even more when he says, "Remember that, do you?"

"Yes. And I know you do, as well." She's done letting him off the hook. That he's willing to talk about this means he's starting to recover from the shock of no Stargate. She's never been known for her patience, really. She thinks she's done quite well this far.

"You don't want to be someone's wife," Cam says. "Again."

"I did all right in Tomin's village. When I was there, I thought - well, it wasn't him, it had nothing to do with him, but I thought if it were someone else, if not for the Ori... even on my own, i could even have been happy. And now I feel as though I'm sort of getting another chance. After Adria... Cameron, I'm tired of running. Earth was going to be my home, I had no plans on leaving, but I was a prisoner there. Here I can really... begin again. And I'm not... alone."

Her confession is stilted but genuine and Cam wants to give it the weight that it deserves. "I had a home. Earth was my home. I can't just up and settle in somewhere else that fast."

"I know. But there's a difference in giving it time to adjust, and refusing..." Her hands grasp his. "Don't give up. If I can be happy here, I know that you can, too."

"Just the fact that you're happy helps. You don't know how much." He lets his hand trail down her back, fingers tickled by the tips of her hair. "I just don't want to start something that... that might have to end someday."

She understands how it is. She doesn't know where this will go, neither of them do, but something about Cam is strongly pulling her in and it scares her as much as it excites her. "If you thought about how things were going to end all the time nothing would happen. You'd be trapped in the cycle of worry and end up filled with regret."

It's not that he doesn't know that, most of the time there is a lot of planning with everything that he does but this is different. His heart will be involved and she could hurt him. Break him. Does he take the chance? Waiting is torture for both of them but her past and how casual about relationships she's been makes him wary.

"Vala, I just..." He looks down at her face. She's so calm, so stable, so... just gorgeous. His head is dipping down and he can't help it, can't stop himself. "Just want this..." The words trail off as his lips cover hers again. She's just as sweet as he can remember and their lips seem to fit perfectly as she parts just a little and lets his lips lock with hers. A moment, three, maybe a full minute of moments later he draws a breath and really starts to kiss her. The soft, pliable feel of her mouth under his makes him clench her closer, pulling her tight to his chest. Her tongue flicks across his lower lip and he opens and lets her in. He's letting her in and both of them moan at the heat of it all.

Wet heat sliding against each other as his tongue joins in. Vala's so delicious he wants to devour her. Cam's fingers track upwards to grip her hair and her palms are keeping her tight to his chest. Soon he can't breathe but can't stop kissing her so his lips trail down her jaw to her neck.

He wants to cry out with how much he's afraid of getting hurt but instead he just whispers in her ear, "You taste just like I remember."

She laughs and squeezes him. "You taste less like alcohol. Much better."

"Sorry..." He's embarrassed now that their first kiss was soiled by his overindulgence. "Try to be better from now on."

"Mmmm, no need. I liked how that turned out." She finds his lips again, a quick deep kiss. "Very much."

And that's how it happens - quietly, sweetly. It doesn't make things easier... in fact, for Cam, it's another complication that in tired moments he'd almost rather not have. But it's also the most fulfilling thing about being here.

They sleep pressed together, like before, but nothing else happens that night.

The next day she kisses him goodbye, a sweet chaste little peck. He returns the same when he sees her later that day for lunch service. He can tell it catches her off guard and she beams at him.

He takes her hand when it's time to walk back to their house. He can see that she's buzzing with excitement and he has no idea what's going to happen but for the moment he's not afraid of it.

Whatever might happen doesn't, though - a neighbor, three homes down the road, has a broken fence and Cam is enlisted to help repair it for the widowed woman. Vala helps to wrangle the chickens that have gotten loose and store them in their own yard, while Cam makes a trip back into town to get the supplies they'll need to fix the fence.

It's after dark by the time they make it back to their home. Cam is dirty and tired and hungry. Vala sees the expression on his face and laughs. "Go, darling. Bathe yourself. Come back to me smelling fresh and clean."

He throws a grin in her direction. "You saying I smell?"

"Yes." She smiles and kisses the corner of Cam's mouth, then shoves at his shoulder. "I'll start dinner."

He actually takes his time scrubbing down, watching the water turn murky and then running more so he can do it all again. He feels refreshed by the time he comes out, though Vala is mocking him through the doorway for excessive pampering - hilarious considering how long her baths take.

"Dinner smells good." He's heading right for her and she turns and grins at him.

Vala's hands slide up his chest and she cups the back of his neck, taking an obvious whiff as he leans into her space. "You do, too. Or at least a big improvement from before."

Their mouths meet and she's sucking on his lower lip. Her fingers rake along the base of his neck and make him groan against her. She's deepening it and things are starting to spiral towards nowhere and everywhere all at once. His stomach choses that moment to interrupt them, hungry, angry noises rumbling from the depths.

"Better feed me." She's laughing as she pulls back, not enough to leave his embrace, but enough to look at him.

Her fingers play at his temple, stroking the tiny hairs and making him grin. "Don't want you to waste away now, do I?"

"Wouldn't be much of a companion if I did." They thread their fingers together and walk the short distance to the table, already set with food. "This looks perfect, baby."

They sit down and start to eat, at some point Cam's hand finds hers again and his thumb plays along her wrist and knuckles. Soon he's just watching the gooseflesh form on her skin, dinner forgotten, as he caresses her flesh. He was feeling tired but the food seems to have revived a little of his ardor from earlier.

"All full?" She thinks how full she wishes to be as the pad of his thumb keeps tracing the veins of her wrist. She doesn't want to move but she wants him. "Ready for bed?" It's said with smoke and her voice gravels with need.

"Tired, baby?"

"No." She gives him a grin and presses her lips to his temple as she gets up to put up the dishes. Despite how badly she wants to just leave it they don't want a wild animal problem and not cleaning up after eating is a great way to start that. He helps her, quiet gropes, quick kisses, once just standing behind her and holding her to him, kissing her neck as she dries the dishes he just finished washing.

Neither of them talk as they head to bed, Cam puts on his pajamas, in the bathroom and comes out to find her already under the covers. He looks at her, wondering if she's wearing something and she must know exactly what he's thinking.

"Don't worry." Her hand beacons him. "Come to bed."

He slides in and settles on his back, she's half on him, her mouth against his, kissing him hard. She's got a tank top and panties on, but that's it and Cam's okay with that. His hand plays against the small of her back, inching up the tank, finding her skin. "This is nice."

She mumbles against his lips. "Just nice?"

"Perfect." Their lips find each other again. Kissing and playing and discovering and connecting. It's dark but that seems to make it more heated.

He wants to have sex with her. That isn't really a mystery; it's a surface need, always right there, hovering in his mind. What she'd feel like, what she'd taste like, how she'd react. He's a guy, it's sex, it's a no-brainer there.

But he's also not going to push and he's not going to be pushed. It just needs to feel... right. Whether right happens sooner or later isn't something he's going to concern himself with. He'll just... see where it goes. Right now, it's going in a pretty good direction. Kisses, wet and long, tongues stroking over each other. She has her hands under his shirt, against his sides... any lower and she'd start to feel the scarring. She's seen it before, but it feels strange for that not to be something he worries about.

"Vala..." He breathes out her name, pulling from the kiss to rest his forehead against hers. "I gotta, I gotta know. Did you and Jackson-"

"Never," she says, meeting his lips again in a hard press of a kiss.

"Never? Nothing? Not even-"

"We- once, we almost, but he was drunk, and... I don't think he even remembered, Cameron. And..." Her voice drops conspiratorially. "He was an awful kisser."

"Hey, I was drunk the first time we kissed, too," Cam points out, laughing. He's not really bothered by the idea that she kissed Jackson, if kissing is all they did.

"Yes, but you were drunk and still good. He was... rather not." She giggles, but then falls serious again. "Is that all right? Cameron, you've got to know, I'm not an innocent-"

"I know," Cam says. "Hell, me neither."

She feigns shock, and he can see it even in the dim light filtering in through the window. "You're no trembling babe in the night? However will I corrupt you, then..."

He pinches her side. "I think you can find ways."

"Mmm, is that a dare, Cameron?"

"I'm smarter than that. So, no, it isn't."

She pouts, prettily, but he leans up and covers it with his mouth. Quickly she forgets what it was she was pretending to be upset about and only knows that he's kissing her.

"Baby..." He inhales her scent, the spicy warmth of her arousal makes him groan. His cock likes this direction. "What do you want?"

"Mmmm" Her mouth covers his trying to answer his question without words. Fingers explore the waistline of his boxers and push under it. "You..."

"We should take it slow..." Suddenly he's worried about going about this too quickly Vala means a lot to him and he doesn't want this to turn out poorly. They have to live together here, get along and sex can ruin everything.

She just pushes her hand closer to his cock, itching to touch it, and kisses him harder. "I do like slow..." She changes the angle and devours him. "Or fast... or hard." She's puffing breath against his cheek and his fingers grip her wrist and stop her progress.

"I'm serious, Vala. Don't wanna ruin this."

It almost makes her laugh but she holds back. "Sex never ruins anything..."

"Ha! It can ruin everything and you know it."

"But not when I'm this horny..." She grumps at him and retreats. "Just kissing?"

He pulls her back to him. "For now."

"There are a lot of places that can be kissed..." She whispers as she covers his lips.

"We can't... anyway," Cam realizes. He breaks the kiss to say it, her mouth still close to his. "We can't have sex."

Her eyes go wide, dramatically. "What?"

"Unless - uh, I'm guessing by the number of babies in the average family here, they don't have birth control, really."

Her face falls. "I don't believe so. I can ask... I suppose, but I doubt..."

Cam hadn't exactly been planning on stripping her naked and fucking her in their bed that night, but he can't deny that now that it's off the table for sure, he's more than a bit disappointed.

He tugs her back into his arms. "I guess just... ask."

That's going to be a pleasant conversation, Vala thinks. She'll have to come up with some reason that she hasn't been concerned with it before now. Or perhaps a reason that she doesn't actually want children right away. The town has a very accepting attitude toward childrearing; married couples start early and most have five or six before nature intervenes. Growing the village is seen as a good thing, as far as she can tell.

None of that really occurs to Cam, though, and Vala can tell that. She decides not to bring it up until she can determine for sure.

"You know that I want to, right?" Cam is pretty sure that she does, but miscommunication can cause issues.

A glance down at the bulge in the sheets tells her everything. "We don't need to be normal about it, you know?"

"i'm not going to develop a penchant for goats..." Cam muses.

Vala whacks his shoulder. "I don't want to waste that on a goat. I mean there are a lot of ways to get off that doesn't involve ways to make babies."

"Yeah, but I really want to be inside you..." He feels his cheeks heat up, unbelieving that he just said that out loud.

Vala kisses him for admitting that. A shiver goes through her spine. "You have other things that you can put inside me." Her fingers find his and she caresses them. "Might not feel exactly the same but..." She rolls off him and places his hand on her stomach. A little nudge tells him to move southward.

Her panties are smooth and he can feel the damp heat even when he's too far north to encounter the slickness. The humidity of her sex wafts up and tickles his finger tips, tempting him to touch her. "You sure?"

"Mmhmm..." Her hips roll and she begs him for more.

There's no more thought about it and Cam's holding his breath as he lets his fingers trace the lines of her pussy over her underwear. The lips are plumping underneath his light caress and the slick heat of her body that's soaking the fabric.

"You're really wet..." He's fascinated by her reaction to him. He takes his time, drawing circles and lines and just having fun exploring her body.

"Take them off..." Her request is followed up with a moan.

"Bossy," Cam comments, though it's really exactly what he'd expected. He turns onto his side to get more comfortable, looking down at where his hand disappears under the blanket. He doesn't do what she'd asked, doesn't take them off, just presses his fingers harder and glides upward, looking for -

"Oh!"

There it is, that spot that makes her jerk. She follows it up with a happy whimper and a thrust of her hips to try and recreate the friction, but Cam has already slid his fingers away. He goes back to stroking her inner thighs, only darting up to press her clit when she stops expecting it.

After the third time she grabs his arm. "Cameron. Do not make me hurt you."

"I'd rather you make me feel good."

"Yes, it's a mutual expectation, I think." She grins at him and grabs his hand, directing it under the cloth. "Do I have to do everything for you?"

"Hmm..." He thinks about it. "I might not mind watching you do all of that."

"Later," she says. "Not tonight. Tonight..."

"This?"

Words escape her as his finger hits slick flesh and skates past her clit down to dip inside of her.

"Yesss," she hisses, mouth dropping open. "Make me come, Cameron."

"Bossy." He presses a kiss to the curve of her jaw when he says it this time. "But I will."

"You like-" She cuts herself off with a gasp as he slowly pumps in and out of her. It feels amazing and her legs part further to allow him to get deeper. Vala arches into him and turns to look at his face. "You like me to boss you." She's all breath and whisper and moan as his thumb sneaks across her clit while his finger presses up into her g-spot.

"I like you every way." He nuzzles at her as his fingers keep moving and working her body. "But this is especially nice." He kisses her neck and licks at her earlobe, taking it between his teeth and sucking while he strokes her clit.

His fingers are so wet, so hot from being inside her and his cock aches for that feeling too. Knowing he won't get it is painful but his hips press themselves into her side and the bump of her body makes him groan. It's about her right now, though, and he tries to get himself under control.

"Faster..." She can feel how turned on he is, but right now can't think to do anything for him. He listens, this time, to her needs and adds a finger, filling her up with two now. She clamps around him and god, it feels so perfect. She's gotten herself off enough here, but it's always different when it's someone else's hands. "'S good, so good..."

"You gonna come, baby?" He kisses along her temple, cheek and in front of her ear. "I wanna watch you come."

Just the sound of that request leaving his lips sends her a little closer, a bit higher. "Close, darling..."

He moves his thumb to the edge of her clit, concentrating on the sensitive tip. She jerks in response and he keeps going, loving the tightening of her body around his fingers. "Come, Vala." He watches her face intently, almost able to feel what she's feeling by her expression. "Come on, sweetheart." She's gorgeous as her face scrunches and a darker blush invades her cheeks. Her neck stretches as her head tilts back and he can feel the tight followed by the rippling. "Beautiful." He whispers as he works her through her orgasm.

He slides his hand out of her panties, fingers tracing now damp circles along her hip as he body shudders with the effort to suck in air she'd somehow forgotten that she needed.

She takes a couple of minutes to recover, but she knows he's patiently waiting and she doesn't put him through too much. She rolls over on top of him, the v of her legs settling right over his cock. He bucks up, making her laugh, giving him a bit of delicious friction.

"Well, I was going to offer to suck you, but if you'd prefer this..." She leans down and nips at his jaw, a spark of pain that he didn't know he'd like until she'd done it.

"Not gonna last long," he mumbles, grabbing her hips. He hasn't done this since he was in college, fumbling around half clothed with girls he would forget by the next week, but right now it sounds just damn perfect.

She braces her hands on his shoulders and starts to move, rubbing back and forth over him. It's good but not exactly perfect, so she reaches down and readjusts him. The casual touch of her fingers on him through the underwear he's wearing is sort of a thrill and he definitely wants more of that, but right now this is the best chance he has of not humiliating himself by coming right away.

"Mmm, better," she says, and her eyes get that sort of glazed under look and he realizes that she's still sensitive and this is doing something for her, too. This makes him feel a little bit better.

He reaches one hand up and cups a breast, unable to resist anymore. His thumb rubs over her nipple but it's not enough for her - she yanks the tank top over her head and then she's naked from the waist up and writhing rhythmically on him. Her breasts bounce with each movement. "Again," she says, guiding his hand back to her now naked flesh.

He pinches the nipple and she definitely likes that. She moves a little faster, humping herself against his cock. The pleasure is too blinding, and he has to shut his eyes and drop his hand back down to her hip. "Vala - fuck-"

She goes faster, wanting him to feel good but more concerned with her own orgasm now, since his is fairly inevitable. It works; she gasps and the pleasure spikes through her again, not quite as intense as before but still wonderful. Cam's left hanging but she can't take the overstimulation so she uses her hand to finish him instead. She feels the come as it pulses out against her hand, soaking his underwear.

He keeps his palms on her thighs moving up and down, feeling the soft smooth skin. She's trembling under his hands and he moves up to her waist and gives a tug to bring her down next to him. When she flops down he can't stop from touching her. Her breasts are small but perfect for his palm and he cups one again, teasing around the nipple.

"Trying for three?" She just grins and watches him play. "I'm not opposed. In case you were worried."

Her nipple puckers under his ministrations and it makes him grin sleepily. "How hard will I have to try?"

"Depends." She takes off her panties, the crotch completely soaked anyway, and tosses them across the room. "Might need to upgrade to something softer than fingers..."

He chuckles and follows her lead, taking off his underwear and using the fabric to clean off his cock before sending them flying. "You're messy."

"The best sex always is." She pulls him in to kiss her.

Tugging at his t-shirt he finally takes it off, breaking the kiss and quickly returning to her lips. "You know you're gorgeous?" He strokes her hair and just looks at her for a minute before starting to explore her with his lips. She's so soft under his mouth and he hovers over her as he works towards her breasts.

"I had a good idea that I was, but you make me feel like I am." She pets his shoulders, down his arms and over his upper back. He feels so nice under her hands and she rubs at his muscles and lets her nails trail lightly all over. His mouth makes her moan as he captures her nipple in his mouth. "You really gonna try for number three?"

"I never-" Cam sucks hard on one bud, "Never." Sucks on the other one. "Joke about orgasms." He tweaks her hip with his hand as he nuzzles the curve of her breast before licking and sucking his way to her along her ribs and stomach.

"Good, those kind of jokes aren't funny to me." She sucks in breath as his tongue laps lightly at her abs.

He can smell her, he could before, but now it's so strong and Cam't cock twitches, wishing that he could participate. "You like this?" He nods toward her cunt and traces a line downward with the tip of his tongue. "Want me to lick you?"

"Cameron, that is a question I will very rarely answer n- ohgod." She arches up when his mouth settles between her legs, hand reaching down to settle in his hair.

She's still sensitive from her second orgasm and it doesn't take long; he doesn't get hard again, not this soon, but that doesn't bother him. He loves the taste of her on his tongue and the sound of her voice in his ears. He loves that when she comes the third time she's clearly exhausted, limp in his arms as he cuddles her to him.

She's asleep almost before his head settles on the pillow beside hers. He watches her for a few minutes before letting himself fall into sleep alongside her.

*

He wishes they had the morning for indulging, sleeping in together, but they don't.

The village only takes one rest day a week and it's not for days. He drags himself out of bed early and dresses, making them some breakfast while Vala sleeps in.

"Where did you go?" She comes out of the bedroom grumpy... and naked

Very naked.

He grins at her. "Food."

Her face lights up. "Fine, that's allowed."

"I'm glad." He laughs, and hands her a plate. "Eat up. Then put on clothes."

She grumbles but she's agreed to help with some cloth dying mid-morning which means she needs to walk to the town center not long after Cam leaves for the fields.

"I suppose..." Not at all disappointed that she can walk around the house nude now. "But they're such a bother."

"For somethings..." He palms her hip, pulling her close as she shovels her eggs into her mouth. "But they make me able to leave on time."

"Oh?" She twists back and forth, just a little, and grins.

His thumb rubs up and down the bone smiling back. "Yeah, leaving a naked Vala is much harder than leaving clothed or partially clothed Vala." His other hand brushes the underside of her breast, beading her nipple. He flicks the pad of his thumb over it and she squeaks.

"Maybe that's my plan..." Her eggs are finished and she sets the bowl down on the table. She leans into him and they kiss. His mouth is hungry for her and it surprises her a little. "Thought you were heading to work?" She murmurs between kisses.

Cam moans against her mouth, a moan of slight pain as he pulls away. "I was... Something better just walked out of the bedroom though..."

"Glad I beat working in the field all day."

He's walking quickly to the door not wanting to be tempted into staying. "You beat doing anything else, baby." He blows her a kiss. "See you at lunch."

She watches him go and then goes to get ready to head to the town.

*