Fic for butifulyletdown

[lilbreck]

For: butifulyletdown
From: ladydreamer
Request: angst w/happy ending, AU, future
Type: Fic
Title: Been Waiting to See the Resolution in Your Eyes
Rating: FRC [anybody]
Warning: Spoilers through "Arctic." Hints of J-Lo
Summary: Clark Kent hasn't seen Chloe since before his showdown with Lex Luthor in the arctic. One year on New Year's Eve, she returns.
A/N: AU after "Arctic." What season eight??

Clark was never the type to make New Year's resolutions, partially because his father had always stressed doing things when they needed to be done, instead of putting them off for another day when it was more convenient. Lately, he normally didn't bother with resolutions because New Year's Eve was a busy time for him. People got into their cars drunk, or did stupid things, fell out of windows, and all those sorts of dumb activities that one did at the end of the most stressful holiday season in America.

Make no mistake, Clark Kent loved his country and believed in the people in it, but sometimes they had less sense than the chickens he'd grown up around.

This evening he didn't particularly know what to expect. He probably had a slight reprieve until January 20th because he couldn't conceive of a presidential inauguration for a Luthor that didn't involve some kind of crisis. In the interests of preventing the chaos that would come from a gap in the presidential line, Clark-or rather his alter ego-had plans to attend.

He carried a glass of chocolate soymilk in a champagne flute that he'd bought in a set several years ago when Lois and Jimmy had married, and he had hosted Jimmy's bachelor party. If anyone could keep Jimmy's roaming eye in place, it would be Lois. With a fist. And she had.

A lopsided grin curved into Clark's lips as he walked out into the balcony. He leaned on the railing and thought about the long lonesome years since that night in the arctic. The night when Lex divulged his knowledge and misunderstanding of Clark's secrets and done something horrible. Which, however, had somehow ended up doing the world a favor. The Fortress' AI was terribly flawed, and under its influence, Clark had never felt free enough or capable enough in himself to make the decisions he needed to make. It had too much power and was too unpredictable. The AI made Clark feel that his powers were something essentially dangerous and uncontrollable, and it reminded him of Zod and Zor-El and his dysfunctional Kryptonian soap opera of a family more than anything heroic or good. That night it had been destroyed.

That night he had also lost Chloe. Not dead, just missing. And while he and Jimmy worked together well enough at The Daily Planet, Clark had never quite forgiven Jimmy for making that deal first with the Department of Homeland Security, and then with a reckless, mildly psychotic Luthor, who was off his medication and had nothing to lose.

Clark had come out of the ice alone. He'd come home to an empty house. No Lana, no Kara, no friends, no family. Nothing. Not even a friend become enemy. So he found a new way to stand tall, to be the hero that Lex had spoken of that night so manically and wistfully.

The hero Chloe had always known he was.

It wasn't always easy, especially since he was on his own. He didn't have a sounding board of any kind, anyone to help him get perspective in his endeavors. Clark knew he needed some perspective; he wasn't delusional about that. He had immense powers, but he wasn't God, no matter what some rich lunatic cult thought. When Lex had finally returned, he seemed more than willing to provide perspective in his own way, although Clark didn't always know if that the way Lex did it was always helpful. Or sane.

"For a guy with super hearing, you're sure easy to sneak up on."

Clark nearly dropped his crystal flute. He managed to catch it with super speed and turned swiftly to see a familiar lopsided smirk.

"Chloe? Where… how? Oh my God!" Clark rushed on her and lifted her off her feet with a big bear hug.

"I guess asking if you missed me would be overkill, huh?"

Clark couldn't give her up just yet. He was afraid that if he let her go, she'd disappear again and never come back. Now he knew how she felt when he disappeared for the summer to Metropolis.

"Gonna let me down, my Übermensch?" Chloe asked after a few minutes.

"Hopefully, I won't let you down ever again." Clark finally let her go and stood back to take a look at her. Her hair came down to her shoulders, though her bangs framed her face in a sprightly way that reminded Clark a little of those funky cuts she used to get back in high school, and she was wearing a navy blue pinstriped skirt suit. She curled her fingers around her ear and shifted her weight, smiling that little smile of hers that was curious and a little self-conscious at the same time.

"Guess you want to know where I've been?" she asked, crossing her arms.

"I… yeah. I couldn't find you." Clark reached over to take her hand. "You don't look like you've aged at all.

Chloe squeezed back. "Neither do you. Although you clean up pretty well."

"Oh?" Clark looked down at his attire. He'd taken off his suit jacket and tie earlier, but he laughed softly. "Had to get out of the flannel someday, right?"

Chloe narrowed her eyes and smiled. "Well. I liked the flannel. But this is nice too."

"Yeah…" Clark shook his head as he realized that he was staring. "Wait, where have you been?"

"Yeah, I thought we might get back to that." Her smile dimmed slightly.

Clark pulled her inside and grinned back at her boyishly. "Story time."

With a soft sigh, Chloe sucked in her lips and looked around his living room. "Nice that Bruce bought this building, hm?"

"I guess so. I don't know why Wayne Enterprises has so much interest in Metropolis, but he's a better landlord than any I've had."

"Yeah. We might have to talk about that." Chloe paused, looking over the books Clark had on his shelf next to the television and running her fingers over the spines. "The government took me."

"I… I guessed, but I couldn't find you. Not even my mom had access. If Lex did, he never let on. He acted like he didn't know-"

"He didn't. He didn't have access until very recently." Chloe turned to Clark and tented her brows. "Special black ops units aren't available to your average billionaire, and they hated they way he in particular tried to butt into their secret projects. You should read the files they kept when they were funding his hotpants army. No one will ever accuse Lex of playing well with others. As the president, however… Well, they have to let him know certain things, and what they've tried to hide from him, he's been digging into. He found my division, but I'll admit, I wasn't hiding it from him like we have other presidents."

Clark was in the middle of pouring coffee when he looked up. "So, what, Lex let you go?"

"Not… exactly. You see, when the government took me, it wasn't for my ability. Not at all. They wanted me for my hacking skills at first, for an anti-terrorist faction of Homeland Security. By the time you'd gotten back, they'd pillaged LuthorCorp and found out more about me than I'd been willing to admit. You could say that made me more valuable to them." Chloe let out a tense sigh.

"Did they hurt you?" Clark asked, concern lacing his voice. He walked over to her and handed her a cow-shaped mug. She smiled at it, and he was happy to see her brilliant smile again.

"A little, during testing. After that, I stayed on my own. There was a lot of work to be done, and I really… I needed them to understand that some of us meteor freaks were good people. Not just homicidal maniacs, or terrorists who blow up buildings and ships. I know that the things the JLA do are well-intentioned, but they piss people off, and the government hadn't been terribly sympathetic to mutant rights up to that point."

"That's why I didn't support the JLA then. I was pretty concerned about their methods. I didn't join them until the Batman did. I knew that my own reservations were similar to the big bat's, and Batman has been doing this gig longer than any of us with much less praise and support."

"I know. I was proud of you for that. Not to mention the guts it took for you to go out in front of everyone like you do," Chloe replied. "Batman is a little crazy, but he has good judgment. A good code."

"So, you wanted to let the government know that freaks are people, too," Clark urged, getting her back on track. "They wouldn't let you come see me?"

Chloe pressed her lips together and widened her eyes. "No. That was my choice."

"What?" Clark asked, feeling a pain in his chest. "Why? Chloe, I missed you."

"I missed you too, Clark, but I was working with the government. I couldn't let them know I knew anything about your secrets," Chloe told him in a pained voice. She set the coffee aside. "You know how they got Kara's memories out of her. You don't have to be willing for them to make you talk."

Clark was quiet for a moment. He put his hands on his hips, turned away, then looked back at her. "I would have protected you."

"No, you don't get it." Chloe looked over to the painting on Clark's wall. Which was ugly, but he'd gotten it from a charity auction. "I had to protect you. They have information. Not specifically regarding you, or Kara, but about combating aliens. They could hurt you. They could kill you, if they thought Superman was a danger, and some of our recent administrations have held that position. They just didn't want to say anything because you're so popular with their constituency."

"You're so political. Were you always so political?" Clark asked harshly.

"I was always pretty jaded," Chloe said with a sad smile. "About politicians and business men especially. If you want to call that political."

"Chloe, I don't know…"

"If you can forgive me for being gone for so long?" she finished, her voice sounding weak.

"What, I'm safe now? They won't interrogate you now?" Clark asked almost angrily. "I haven't seen my best friend in years. I mourned you!"

"President Lex Luthor doesn't need to have me interrogated," Chloe replied dryly. "He knows who you are, and he doesn't want to share you."

Clark turned away from her and paced around his apartment. Over the years, he'd thought, occasionally, that he'd heard Chloe's heartbeat. Sometimes when he was on location trying to divert one crisis or another, he would heart the pattern of life that cried 'Chloe' to him. Always had. Always would. He caught whispers of a voice that sounded like her lively, passion-filled tone. Every time, when he'd been unable to find her yet again, he'd convinced himself that he'd been wrong. She wasn't out there.

Chloe would never abandon him.

"I never meant to hurt you so much, Clark. I just couldn't let them take you. Strap you to a table. It would be your worst nightmare come true," Chloe argued.

"That wasn't my worst nightmare, Chloe," Clark grumbled. He looked at his kitchen counter, frowning deeply, and was unable to turn around and look at her. "My worst nightmare was to be alone. To outlive everyone who cared about me!"

Chloe's head dipped momentarily, and then she looked up at him with shining eyes. "I'm sorry, Clark."

Clark knew he was sulking, but he couldn't bring himself to look in her eyes. His father had abandoned him once, almost repudiating him as a son when he'd inadvertently caused his mother's miscarriage, and his mother had gone off to Washington, only occasionally coming back. She'd called Lionel Luthor more than him. Lex left him unwillingly through his shifting mental illness that Clark was too ethically sensitive to bring up unsourced in his own articles, even if Perry wanted him to.

Lana had abandoned him completely, only to return a few years later, passive aggressively taking credit for his accomplishments as the city's ridiculous superhero and then being arrested during their dinner for the crimes she'd committed before she'd run off. Lois had forgotten about Clark once she'd gotten fired from The Daily Planet and found her new "lifelong dream" as an artist, then as a private investigator, then as a television personality to host reality tv. Kara had been abducted by Brainiac, and Clark had still not found her.

Chloe was not supposed to leave him. Chloe was supposed to always be there. Always waiting.

And now Chloe's matching heels were heading for the door, and she was taking little short breaths and sounding like she was trying not to cry.

He turned to see her retreating figure. "Chloe… I…"

She stopped, staring at the door. "I understand, Clark. It's not fair to just show up again and expect things to be right where they were when we left off. I'm different, even if I look the same. You've definitely changed, and all for the better. I'm sorry you had to do it all on your own. I wish I could have been there for you."

"No. You couldn't control what happened to you. It was Jimmy's fault. He sold you out."

"Actually, it started with Kara hacking into a national security network. We should have explained to her how our government works. I doubt it's the same as it was when your people visited last. The information in her crystal was obviously dated."

"So it was my fault," Clark replied flippantly.

Chloe whipped around. "No, it wasn't- Oh. You.."

Clark laughed and closed the distance between them. They embraced once more.

"You're back in my life again." Clark sighed. "How can I be unhappy about that?"

"It's different now. I've been promoted, so I'll have a little more control regarding my assignments, but I still have someone to report to-"

"That so doesn't sound like you," Clark replied. "I can't believe you're not writing."

"Oh, I'm writing. Just not about things that could get me put in prison for treason. And just because I report doesn't mean I don't argue with him." Chloe sighed as well. "Can we ever get back the friendship we had? I never wanted to give it up. I never wanted to give you up, but I couldn't see you hurt, either."

"I guess I understand that. If it had been a choice between you dying and having to stay with the Fortress for training, I would have stayed, even if it meant being away from you for years," Clark admitted.

"Ever letting me go?" she asked after a moment. A smile was evident in her voice.

"No," Clark replied, but he released her anyway. "What are you? CIA? FBI?"

Chloe bit her lip and shook her head mutely.

"Well. If anyone can keep a secret." Clark ran his fingers through the soft blond hair falling into her face. "You're an MIB."

"Wrong letters. I'm not a man in black," Chloe replied.

Clark chuckled. "How sexist of me."

Chloe suddenly tilted her head to the side, touched her ear, and then held her wrist up to her mouth. "Watchtower here… No, I'm fine. Just meeting up with an old friend…"

Clark frowned and narrowed his eyes at her. She was talking into her watch. Chloe raised a brow.

"Undressing me with your eyes or checking me for a wire?" she asked quietly. "No, Davis, I'm not talking to you. Is it an emergency?" Chloe sighed heavily. "Allie is allergic to dogs. You might not want to get her a puppy for her birthday. Try a kitten, if you want to go for an animal, but do you really think she spends enough time at her apartment to keep track of a pet? … Good boy. Her birthstone is garnet."

When Chloe lowered her arm, their eyes met, and Clark spoke. "I wasn't scanning you. The Chloe I know wouldn't come in here with a wire."

"I'm still the Chloe you know. I hope." She blinked slowly, searching his eyes apprehensively.

"I hope so too." Clark watched her green eyes. He'd missed that green. That beautiful green mixed with strength and resolve that no one else in the world had. "Let's… There's a café on the corner that makes the best pie. Not as good as Ma's, but pretty good. Can we go there? Catch up? Or… at least as much as you're allowed?"

"I wish I could tell you, Clark, but-"

"If anyone knows the value of secret keeping, it's me," Clark assured her. "I don't think you'd keep anything from me that you didn't feel you had to."

"Well, if we got you involved on the inside, then you could get clearance," she pointed out.

"Are you here to recruit me?" Clark asked, quirking a brow.

"It would make my life easier," Chloe replied with a shrug. "But I doubt it would make yours any easier. No, I'm not trying to recruit you, Clark. You become the job."

"I can relate to that." Clark walked over to get his leather jacket, even though he wouldn't be cold.

Together they walked to the door and headed down the stairs. There were people hanging out just outside of the building, drinking champagne and dancing a little with their noisemakers in hand. Couples passed them on the street, laughing and holding hands. All waiting for the New Year to come. Clark looked down and saw how the moonlight caught the highlights of Chloe's hair.

"What?" Chloe asked, looking up at him as they walked together.

"I thought about you all the time. I was scared you were dead. I was scared you weren't. I didn't know what to do without you," Clark admitted. "When Brainiac got you, it… It wasn't like when he got Lana."

"When he got Lana, you imploded."

"When he got you, I exploded. I went after him. I destroyed him."

"You thought you did. He's still out there. The bastard always makes backup copies of himself," Chloe replied with clear annoyance in her voice.

Clark laughed. "Is he that much of a pest?"

"I think his entire existence is meant to annoy me, yes."

His joy bubbled over. He hadn't laughed this way in years. "You've always done this to me. You get me moving. You challenge me. You push me to be more than I am."

"You made this out of yourself without me there, Clark," Chloe insisted.

Clark watched her face with admiration. "But I did it for you. You were the one who said 'You have to get on that, Clark!'"

"I didn't sound like that!" Chloe laughed now, bowing her head slightly in embarrassment, which suggested that she knew she had sounded exactly like that.

"So you were gone. And I got on that."

"You did a lot of things while I was gone."

"I didn't want to lose you for nothing."

"I'm not lost. I just… I'm sorry-"

Clark caught her chin in his hand, and they stopped there in the middle of the sidewalk in front of Centennial Park. "Stop saying you're sorry. I forgive you if you forgive me for being a dope when Brainiac wanted to kill me."

"That's not the only time you're a dope," Chloe teased. "Made all the worse by the fact that you proved your genius to me in eight grade algebra class by correcting Mr. Culver all the time."

"Eight grade math isn't exactly genius level," Clark replied, feeling the fog of her breath. She was probably cold. She was shaking a little.

"No one can keep up with Lex Luthor if they don't have something going on upstairs. But you're forgiven, y'know. Always. Just give me one of your farmboy smiles."

Clark widened his mouth in a huge grin, and Chloe reciprocated.

"There you go-"

And Clark pressed his lips to hers. They were a bit dry, but soft, and he could taste the fresh mint on her breath as she kissed him back. Chloe had always smelled so good. Every time he was on Red K, he just had to smell her, no matter who his logical mind was trying to direct him towards.

Chloe's tongue brushed over his lower lip and sucked it into her mouth. They seemed to melt into one another. All around them, people started to cheer, letting their noisemakers go, and fireworks began to go off. Clark felt like the entire world was cheering them on.

Or at least the entire Central time zone.

Chloe pulled back first, but only because she actually had to breathe, and Clark wasn't limited by such minor things. She looked into his eyes once again and whispered a bit breathlessly, "We're different."

"Yeah," Clark agreed. He took off his jacket and put it around her shoulders. "Kinda. But people have to change, don't they?"

A little curious smile began to spread on her lips, and she took his hand, looking up as her mind worked to consider this new development. Clark could practically see her mind working, even without x-ray vision. He'd missed that, too.

They continued their walk, barely breaking one another's gaze and thinking about the shift in their relationship. So much to rediscover, so much that was new and frightening. And yet it had all somehow always been there, brewing, building, waiting to surface. Clark Kent and Chloe Sullivan. Superman and Watchtower.

Then and now. Past, present, and future. Forever.