"Begin to make it better", SGA/SG-1, John Sheppard/Cameron Mitchell

[scrollgirl]

You have NO IDEA how hard this story was to write. Considering it's not even 2500 words, I spent a ridiculous number of late nights trying to make it work. So many lines discarded, every paragraph re-worked a dozen different ways so it'd fit the emotional theme of the prompt. I'm cranky and tense and sleep-deprived, and I can't tell if this is a

Comments

[gaffsie]

John is being so brave about this. We all know that he's really bad at talking about feelings, and here he is doing his very best to do just that. He's reaching for something he's always wanted but never thought he'd get, he's putting himself out there. That is brave. I also like that Cam admits to being too pushy. No one is perfect, and I'm happy that's acknowledged here.

We loved each other, even if it was a mistake, she wasn't a, a beard, it's not like I'm..." He stops, fumbles for words. "I'm not self-hating or some shit like that."

You have no idea how happy you just made me with this. You allowed Nancy to be important to him, and that's more than most writers do. Because yeah, you can love more than one person, and yes, sometimes relationships just don't work out, no matter how much love there is to begin with. And he isn't self-hating or clueless to his emotions either! ♥

I started quoting the parts I liked about the sex, but that fell apart right away, because I liked everything. *cough* But the dirty-talk and Cam just

[scrollgirl]

Oh yay! I'm really, really glad this worked for you! Phew. It was a killer to write.

John's being so brave, yes! It's partly out of fear, because if he doesn't do something then Cam's going to leave him. (Not true, but it's what he's afraid of.) And I can see Cam being pretty demanding. Not about chores or whatever, but impatient with John's fears. Which Cam knows is his problem -- he doesn't have context for John's issues, hasn't had those experiences.

Nancy! I have so much love for "Outcast" and Dave and Nancy and even Patrick Sheppard. Patrick approving of his marriage was a bonus, but I really believe John was attracted to Nancy (she's so his type, long dark hair, olive skin) and they were in love. It just didn't work out.

I had to keep yanking the sex scene back on track. It kept getting pornier, if you can believe it! Cam's got a dirty, dirty mouth, and John really, really likes to get fucked. *cough* Umm

[gaffsie]

Not about chores or whatever, but impatient with John's fears. Which Cam knows is his problem -- he doesn't have context for John's issues, hasn't had those experiences.

Yeah, exactly. He comes from an environment when that sort of openness is natural and expected, and he'd probably have a hard time adjusting to John and his issues.

I really believe John was attracted to Nancy (she's so his type, long dark hair, olive skin) and they were in love. It just didn't work out.

That's what I think too. Just look at Teyla and Larrin. He likes them bronze and dangerous. ;) I really wish we'd been given more of Nancy (and Dave! I would have killed for another Dave-episode), because there's no doubt in my mind that they did love each other. Why else would the divorce be such a sore subject with him?

I had to keep yanking the sex scene back on track. It kept getting pornier, if you can believe it! Cam's got a dirty, dirty mouth, and John really, really likes to get fucked. *cough* Umm.That's the beauty of writing a verse. You can always use

[scrollgirl]

Oh man, I would've loved another Dave-episode! I'm working on a John/Cam wallpaper, and trying to manip a Dylan Neal pic from Blood Ties so it'll become a "family portrait" wallpaper.

I wouldn't say no to writing another John/Cam PWP. *evil grin* Certainly I'm not lacking in imagination in that department! But too bad my stargate_summer fic will probably never be finished. It's so hard to write plot.

(Dude, Cam making John wear a pair of panties! O.O That's another fic prompt to keep in mind!)

[bluflamingo]

I really love this, that John recognises Cam needs him to talk then does it, even though he finds it really difficult. And his childhood makes me want to give little John a hug and find someone to take care of him better.

"I love you," he says, and it comes out faint and scared-sounding. But John's more scared of Cam not knowing exactly how much he needs him. "Don't give up on me."

And this line makes me want to give grown-up John a hug, even though he has Cam to take care of him now.

[scrollgirl]

John's childhood... I've been wondering abuot that. My take is boarding schools, impossible expectations, keeping up appearances, etc. Plenty of *stuff*, but nobody really knew him, what he wanted, so gifts would disappoint him. Mom took care of him, but deferred to her husband. Dad loved him but didn't communicate it.

*pets John* Cam's going to be real good to him from now on!

[tzzzz]

That was great. I was just rereading the orginal red ribbon story just before you posted this and I really enjoyed seeing where it was going. A part of me really wishes that John and Cam were Brendan's biological parents, though. It seems so sad to waste a good genderswap by not going all the way to mpreg, but then again I have an unnatural obsession with mpreg, so I might not be the most objective.

Also, totally, totally hot.

[scrollgirl]

Well, John and Cam are Brendan's biological parents in terms of DNA. Just DNA from an Alternate Reality! I don't think I can go to the mpreg place (though I've read my share and often enjoy them!), but basically the genderswap from Red Ribbon doesn't get reversed in an Alternate Reality and Brendan is the result.

Glad you liked the fic!

[earp_girl]

I love this fic, it is so well written - and gripping - god you should write a book of these two - and make up sex is always the best. brilliant stuff

[scrollgirl]

Thanks so much, glad you liked it! I love John and Cam, and I foresee more stories of them, either prior to getting together or them as an old married couple. I'm not getting bored of them any time soon!

[earp_girl]

Do you have a collection of this storyline somewheres I can read more? pretty please? Can you be bribed with chocolate? hmm?

[scrollgirl]

I don't want to get your hopes up! I haven't actually written that much. But you can find my Red Ribbon fic via my tag red+ribbon or via my Red Ribbon-verse chart, which lays out how the various Alternate Realities intersect.

Hopefully there will be more in this 'verse soon, but I'm a pretty slow writer :)

[twistedchick]

::hearts this::

[scrollgirl]

Thank you! Btw, stargate_summer is sooo not gonna happen. I think you must've sensed that! *g* But I still hope to one day write that story, even if it's piece by piece, through shorter fics like this one.

[twistedchick]

I had that hunch. Have you notified the people organizing it that you won't be writing, so they won't be waiting for you?

[scrollgirl]

Oops, not yet. I'll drop them a note, thanks.