Fic: The Road Home
college!danny angst, with a bit of sympathy for an unlikely character
Danny was just a kid in college when they met, one more intern stumbling through, but they clicked right away. After a few days, Casey asked the station manager if Dan could stay in the sports department instead of doing the usual rotation. After a few weeks, they started plotting a shared career.
Casey knew that Dan’s home life was troubled; they spent so much time together that not even Casey could fail to notice that he spent every holiday at school, even though his parents live close enough to make even weekend visits manageable.
Oddly enough, his father, who clearly had a volatile relationship with his son, was the one person who occasionally visited Dan. Although ‘visit’ seemed like too friendly a word for his sporadic appearances, whose sole purpose seemed to lie in shaking up Danny’s world like a snow globe, leaving him shaken and unsteady for days afterward. Casey had never met the man, but he’d seen the way Danny looked after he’d been around.
This last visit had been one of the worst. Jacob Rydell had arrived at the station an hour earlier than expected, so Dan was talking to Casey in his office instead of waiting for him at the front desk like he usually did.
Casey couldn’t remember what they had been laughing about when someone knocked on the frame of the open door, but he couldn’t forget how quickly Danny had stopped when he saw that it was his father, couldn’t forget how he suddenly went quiet and rigid and apprehensive.
Danny had stumbled through introductions, and Casey smiled and shook hands and tried to pretend that Dan’s father wasn’t glaring at both of them like a boss whose employees were caught slacking off. Casey offered a tour of the station, offered to let them use his office, but Dan’s dad waved him off impatiently. "I don’t have a lot of time, Danny. Can you leave now?"
"Um, yeah, I think so. Casey?" Danny looked at Casey for the first time since his father had arrived, and Casey tried to smile in a way that didn’t show he really wanted to say no. No, you can’t leave now, can’t leave later, can’t leave ever with this man who makes you look so lost and wary.
"Sure, of course. You already gave me the recruiting stats - which where great, by the way - and I’m not on air today, so you’re all caught up. Take the afternoon if you want, but I’ll see you tonight, right? To watch the game?" Casey stopped himself from adding and drink some beer just in time; Danny, after all, wasn’t of age.
His friendliness didn’t lessen the glare any, and Casey was frankly relieved when Danny nodded quickly and left with his father. He was back, by himself, in a couple of hours. He was quiet and withdrawn all afternoon, which was par for the course after seeing his father. He also kept looking at Casey, and Casey kept thinking he was going to say something, but he never did.
Casey stayed close to him for the rest of the day, and didn’t give him a chance to leave alone. "Just come over now; I’ll order pizza." Danny looked at Casey like he wasn’t quite fluent in that language, so Casey just put a hand on his shoulder and steered him to the car.
By the time the pizza arrived, Danny was drinking his fourth beer but still hadn’t spoken a dozen words. They sat on the floor, because the carpet is easier to clean than the sofa, and they were on the first mouthful when Danny asked a question.
"Casey, do you think we would be friends even if we didn’t work together?" Danny routinely talked about his sex life with an ease that awed and eluded Casey, which made it pretty funny when he brought up this innocuous topic in such a bashful way, eyes downcast, hands twisting in his lap.
But that was the first real break in the brooding silence that remained hours after Dan’s father left, so Casey set down his pizza and answered him with no teasing.
"Assuming we’d get the chance to meet, yeah, I think we’d be friends. Why wouldn’t we be? We’re best friends now, and not everything we do is related to work. Don’t you think so?"
Dan’s smile at ‘best friends’ was fleeting but genuine, and even with the smile gone he looked pleased and relieved and nodded vigorously in agreement.
"Yeah, absolutely. I think we’d be friends no matter what. It’s just, it’s just that my dad, he doesn’t even think we’re real friends." Dan said this quickly, looking intently at his beer bottle and not at all at Casey.
"Does he think we’re imaginary friends?" Casey deadpanned. "Because he talked right to me at the station today, Danny, and I don’t think I’ve done anything since then to deserve being demoted to imaginary status."
Danny was just drunk enough to think that pretty funny, and his clarification was a bit giggly, "Not - - not the imaginary kind of not real, you dork."
"What kind of not-real friends does he think we are, then? Because your father’s reasoning is not readily apparent to me, Dan."
"That’s because you’re naïve, Casey, and you don’t know anything about the adult world." Dan looked up, his expression blank, his harsh words and ugly tone an obvious imitation of his father. "Being friendly with someone at work is not the same as being friends, please tell me you’re not too stupid to understand that."
Dan’s voice was mostly steady, and he finished in a rush. "Casey wants you to do his research and then go away, not follow him around like a damn puppy dog. Can’t you quit aggravating everyone around you for a change, and just do your job?"
That’s the most Danny has ever said about one of his father’s visits, and for a second he looked surprised at his own outburst, and then he just looked thoroughly miserable and embarrassed. Casey in turn took a second to hate Danny’s father, but just a second, because he knew he needed to respond quickly, before Dan went back to quiet and unreachable again.
"And he came to these conclusions after, what, five minutes of talking to me? He’s an asshole. Sorry, man, I know he’s your dad, but it’s true." Casey shoved the pizza box out of the way and slid closer to Danny. "He doesn’t know what he’s talking about, and he’s wrong. I’m sorry if he disapproves or disagrees, but you’re my best friend, and nothing he says is going to change that fact. You know that, right?"
Not satisfied with Dan’s silent nod, Casey poked him in the side, right under his ribs. "Yeah? You sure about that?"
"Yes! I’m sure. Stop tickling me." He shoved Casey’s hand away, but he’s smiling. "We’re friends. Yeah, I know that."
That settled that, so they ate pizza and watched the game and didn't talk about it anymore. When Danny fell asleep, Casey threw a blanket over him instead of waking him up to go home like he usually does. Curled up on the hard floor, Danny slept without dreaming.
Jacob Rydell leaned against his car, smoking a cigarette from the pack he kept hidden in the glove compartment. He should get back on the damn road, traffic was only going to get worse, but for now all he could do smoke and replay the afternoon in his head.
It shouldn’t be this hard, visiting his own son. They’d always locked horns - - Danny was stubborn and sensitive, and Jacob was stubborn and impatient, and it made for a hell of a combination. Danny’s intensity grated on his nerves, and he couldn’t seem to talk to the boy without upsetting him.
Take the whole Casey thing, for example. He was just trying to warn Danny, make him see that he needed to be careful, not overstep his bounds. Jacob knew how important this internship was to Danny, and if he was going to keep it, the kid needed to understand that Casey was his boss first and his friend second, if at all.
Danny had gotten mad right away - - apparently, naïve was a worse insult than Jacob had imagined - - and things just went downhill from there.
He tried to explain what he meant, with no success, and when he yelled in frustration Danny yelled right back. Normally he wouldn’t put up with that, or with the tears that were threatening to overtake Danny, but . . . shit. He hadn’t mean to upset the boy, not like this.
Maybe he shouldn’t have come. But Hannah wouldn’t make the trip, with or without him, and somebody needed to check on the kid sometimes.
He saw the blame in Danny’s eyes every time he showed up alone, knew that Danny thought Hannah’s absence was somehow his fault. That was okay. It was better than the truth, which was that Jacob always asked her to come. Begged her. "Please, Hannah. I don’t know how to help him. You’re the one he misses. What am I supposed to tell him?"
It was no use. Since Sam died, it seemed that Hannah’s heart was so full of grief that it had no room for anything else. She held onto her sorrow like she was holding on to Sam himself, until sorrow was her world, until everything else faded away and she couldn’t even see the lost boy who needed her so much.
One last cigarette, and he’d head back. Danny would be okay. He was upset today, but that’s just the way he was. Too damned sensitive. He’d be okay.
Jacob leaned against his car, staring at nothing until it got too dark to see.
,
Danny was just a kid in college when they met, one more intern stumbling through, but they clicked right away. After a few days, Casey asked the station manager if Dan could stay in the sports department instead of doing the usual rotation. After a few weeks, they started plotting a shared career.
Casey knew that Dan’s home life was troubled; they spent so much time together that not even Casey could fail to notice that he spent every holiday at school, even though his parents live close enough to make even weekend visits manageable.
Oddly enough, his father, who clearly had a volatile relationship with his son, was the one person who occasionally visited Dan. Although ‘visit’ seemed like too friendly a word for his sporadic appearances, whose sole purpose seemed to lie in shaking up Danny’s world like a snow globe, leaving him shaken and unsteady for days afterward. Casey had never met the man, but he’d seen the way Danny looked after he’d been around.
This last visit had been one of the worst. Jacob Rydell had arrived at the station an hour earlier than expected, so Dan was talking to Casey in his office instead of waiting for him at the front desk like he usually did.
Casey couldn’t remember what they had been laughing about when someone knocked on the frame of the open door, but he couldn’t forget how quickly Danny had stopped when he saw that it was his father, couldn’t forget how he suddenly went quiet and rigid and apprehensive.
Danny had stumbled through introductions, and Casey smiled and shook hands and tried to pretend that Dan’s father wasn’t glaring at both of them like a boss whose employees were caught slacking off. Casey offered a tour of the station, offered to let them use his office, but Dan’s dad waved him off impatiently. "I don’t have a lot of time, Danny. Can you leave now?"
"Um, yeah, I think so. Casey?" Danny looked at Casey for the first time since his father had arrived, and Casey tried to smile in a way that didn’t show he really wanted to say no. No, you can’t leave now, can’t leave later, can’t leave ever with this man who makes you look so lost and wary.
"Sure, of course. You already gave me the recruiting stats - which where great, by the way - and I’m not on air today, so you’re all caught up. Take the afternoon if you want, but I’ll see you tonight, right? To watch the game?" Casey stopped himself from adding and drink some beer just in time; Danny, after all, wasn’t of age.
His friendliness didn’t lessen the glare any, and Casey was frankly relieved when Danny nodded quickly and left with his father. He was back, by himself, in a couple of hours. He was quiet and withdrawn all afternoon, which was par for the course after seeing his father. He also kept looking at Casey, and Casey kept thinking he was going to say something, but he never did.
Casey stayed close to him for the rest of the day, and didn’t give him a chance to leave alone. "Just come over now; I’ll order pizza." Danny looked at Casey like he wasn’t quite fluent in that language, so Casey just put a hand on his shoulder and steered him to the car.
By the time the pizza arrived, Danny was drinking his fourth beer but still hadn’t spoken a dozen words. They sat on the floor, because the carpet is easier to clean than the sofa, and they were on the first mouthful when Danny asked a question.
"Casey, do you think we would be friends even if we didn’t work together?" Danny routinely talked about his sex life with an ease that awed and eluded Casey, which made it pretty funny when he brought up this innocuous topic in such a bashful way, eyes downcast, hands twisting in his lap.
But that was the first real break in the brooding silence that remained hours after Dan’s father left, so Casey set down his pizza and answered him with no teasing.
"Assuming we’d get the chance to meet, yeah, I think we’d be friends. Why wouldn’t we be? We’re best friends now, and not everything we do is related to work. Don’t you think so?"
Dan’s smile at ‘best friends’ was fleeting but genuine, and even with the smile gone he looked pleased and relieved and nodded vigorously in agreement.
"Yeah, absolutely. I think we’d be friends no matter what. It’s just, it’s just that my dad, he doesn’t even think we’re real friends." Dan said this quickly, looking intently at his beer bottle and not at all at Casey.
"Does he think we’re imaginary friends?" Casey deadpanned. "Because he talked right to me at the station today, Danny, and I don’t think I’ve done anything since then to deserve being demoted to imaginary status."
Danny was just drunk enough to think that pretty funny, and his clarification was a bit giggly, "Not - - not the imaginary kind of not real, you dork."
"What kind of not-real friends does he think we are, then? Because your father’s reasoning is not readily apparent to me, Dan."
"That’s because you’re naïve, Casey, and you don’t know anything about the adult world." Dan looked up, his expression blank, his harsh words and ugly tone an obvious imitation of his father. "Being friendly with someone at work is not the same as being friends, please tell me you’re not too stupid to understand that."
Dan’s voice was mostly steady, and he finished in a rush. "Casey wants you to do his research and then go away, not follow him around like a damn puppy dog. Can’t you quit aggravating everyone around you for a change, and just do your job?"
That’s the most Danny has ever said about one of his father’s visits, and for a second he looked surprised at his own outburst, and then he just looked thoroughly miserable and embarrassed. Casey in turn took a second to hate Danny’s father, but just a second, because he knew he needed to respond quickly, before Dan went back to quiet and unreachable again.
"And he came to these conclusions after, what, five minutes of talking to me? He’s an asshole. Sorry, man, I know he’s your dad, but it’s true." Casey shoved the pizza box out of the way and slid closer to Danny. "He doesn’t know what he’s talking about, and he’s wrong. I’m sorry if he disapproves or disagrees, but you’re my best friend, and nothing he says is going to change that fact. You know that, right?"
Not satisfied with Dan’s silent nod, Casey poked him in the side, right under his ribs. "Yeah? You sure about that?"
"Yes! I’m sure. Stop tickling me." He shoved Casey’s hand away, but he’s smiling. "We’re friends. Yeah, I know that."
That settled that, so they ate pizza and watched the game and didn't talk about it anymore. When Danny fell asleep, Casey threw a blanket over him instead of waking him up to go home like he usually does. Curled up on the hard floor, Danny slept without dreaming.
Jacob Rydell leaned against his car, smoking a cigarette from the pack he kept hidden in the glove compartment. He should get back on the damn road, traffic was only going to get worse, but for now all he could do smoke and replay the afternoon in his head.
It shouldn’t be this hard, visiting his own son. They’d always locked horns - - Danny was stubborn and sensitive, and Jacob was stubborn and impatient, and it made for a hell of a combination. Danny’s intensity grated on his nerves, and he couldn’t seem to talk to the boy without upsetting him.
Take the whole Casey thing, for example. He was just trying to warn Danny, make him see that he needed to be careful, not overstep his bounds. Jacob knew how important this internship was to Danny, and if he was going to keep it, the kid needed to understand that Casey was his boss first and his friend second, if at all.
Danny had gotten mad right away - - apparently, naïve was a worse insult than Jacob had imagined - - and things just went downhill from there.
He tried to explain what he meant, with no success, and when he yelled in frustration Danny yelled right back. Normally he wouldn’t put up with that, or with the tears that were threatening to overtake Danny, but . . . shit. He hadn’t mean to upset the boy, not like this.
Maybe he shouldn’t have come. But Hannah wouldn’t make the trip, with or without him, and somebody needed to check on the kid sometimes.
He saw the blame in Danny’s eyes every time he showed up alone, knew that Danny thought Hannah’s absence was somehow his fault. That was okay. It was better than the truth, which was that Jacob always asked her to come. Begged her. "Please, Hannah. I don’t know how to help him. You’re the one he misses. What am I supposed to tell him?"
It was no use. Since Sam died, it seemed that Hannah’s heart was so full of grief that it had no room for anything else. She held onto her sorrow like she was holding on to Sam himself, until sorrow was her world, until everything else faded away and she couldn’t even see the lost boy who needed her so much.
One last cigarette, and he’d head back. Danny would be okay. He was upset today, but that’s just the way he was. Too damned sensitive. He’d be okay.
Jacob leaned against his car, staring at nothing until it got too dark to see.
,