Avatar P.S. - 3D sucks, a drinking game, and why evil matters
1. Can I also mention the 3D glasses?
I didn't want to see this in 3D, but based on the times it was showing at the theater I was willing to go to, I got stuck watching this in 3D. I'm not sure why this cinematic option has made a comeback, but it really takes away more than it offers. If you wear glasses, then you have to wear these things on top of your glasses, and they barely fit. So you're uncomfortable. Also, the lenses are dark. So you’re seeing the film with a tint. So all of the color and detail that went into the film is cut in half by 3D glasses. The difference in lighting is staggering.
Also, the ticket costs $3 more for half the experience. Even going by myself it's more than I wanted to spend on a movie I wasn't sure I was going to like. Fortunately I had to sit next to three very talky white girls, so I never felt alone (and I point out their race only to illustrate the point that everyone talks during movies, not just black folks. White folks just use "inside voices", black folks obviously use "outside voices" and mullatos must use "trapped in the cat door voices").
2. You want a drinking game? Take a shot every time there's something in this film that was already done in another film that didn't take $300 million dollars to make, wasn't blue and wasn't by James Cameron. You'll be drunk in fifteen minutes.
3. And before someboy gets on their high horse to joust with my high horse to make the point that it's just a popcorn movie, consider this: Hollywood is in the worst economic lurch in the history of film. Production companies - the people who determine what films get made - are closing left and right or firing so much staff that they can't greenlight anything. Half of the CEOs in Hollywood have been fired or turned around in the last six months...HALF. Thanks to the gestation period of making a film, the industry is still reeling from the hiatus of the writers' strike only to be hit with economic armageddeon. Movies that have name actors in them are being cancelled. People are leaving the film industry and going to TV, not to make good art, but to survive.
What does this mean to people who aren't actors (ie. us)? This means that the only types of films Hollywood will be releasing are sequels to previously well-performing films regardless of quality (yay...another Transformers film. Whoopee.) and cheap comedies (yay...another riff on relationships by Rudd and Rogan. Whoopee). You think The Road is depressing? Find an interview with its director and see what depressing really is.
What does this have to do with Avatar? At a conservative $300 million Avatar cost twice as much as all three Lord of the Rings films. You know what else you could make with $300 million?
- 2 The Dark Knights
- 3 The Departeds
- 4 Inglorious Basterds
- 4 Surrogates (talk about avatars!)
- 5 The Matrixs
- 6 Sweeney Todds (I don't even like musicals and I liked this)
- 6 Changelings
- 8 Burn After Readings
- 9 Sevens
- 10 Million Dollar Babys
- 10 9s
- 12 Mystic Rivers
- 15 Silence of the Lambs
- 30 Dogmas
All of these films are better than Avatar. Think about the cool scenes, the awesome dialgoue, the powerful effects...then think about Ava-fucking-tar. I would want to see more of all of these types of films (done right, not done like the clones that did indeed follow some of them). It takes an enormous amount of hubris to commit a dying industry to an enterprise like this, especially when that enterprise is wack. Cameron is a dick. He could have made any film he wanted, but opted to make a film that clogs up the coffers for anywhere from 3-4 huge budget films to 30 or more low budget films.
I didn't want to see this in 3D, but based on the times it was showing at the theater I was willing to go to, I got stuck watching this in 3D. I'm not sure why this cinematic option has made a comeback, but it really takes away more than it offers. If you wear glasses, then you have to wear these things on top of your glasses, and they barely fit. So you're uncomfortable. Also, the lenses are dark. So you’re seeing the film with a tint. So all of the color and detail that went into the film is cut in half by 3D glasses. The difference in lighting is staggering.
Also, the ticket costs $3 more for half the experience. Even going by myself it's more than I wanted to spend on a movie I wasn't sure I was going to like. Fortunately I had to sit next to three very talky white girls, so I never felt alone (and I point out their race only to illustrate the point that everyone talks during movies, not just black folks. White folks just use "inside voices", black folks obviously use "outside voices" and mullatos must use "trapped in the cat door voices").
2. You want a drinking game? Take a shot every time there's something in this film that was already done in another film that didn't take $300 million dollars to make, wasn't blue and wasn't by James Cameron. You'll be drunk in fifteen minutes.
3. And before someboy gets on their high horse to joust with my high horse to make the point that it's just a popcorn movie, consider this: Hollywood is in the worst economic lurch in the history of film. Production companies - the people who determine what films get made - are closing left and right or firing so much staff that they can't greenlight anything. Half of the CEOs in Hollywood have been fired or turned around in the last six months...HALF. Thanks to the gestation period of making a film, the industry is still reeling from the hiatus of the writers' strike only to be hit with economic armageddeon. Movies that have name actors in them are being cancelled. People are leaving the film industry and going to TV, not to make good art, but to survive.
What does this mean to people who aren't actors (ie. us)? This means that the only types of films Hollywood will be releasing are sequels to previously well-performing films regardless of quality (yay...another Transformers film. Whoopee.) and cheap comedies (yay...another riff on relationships by Rudd and Rogan. Whoopee). You think The Road is depressing? Find an interview with its director and see what depressing really is.
What does this have to do with Avatar? At a conservative $300 million Avatar cost twice as much as all three Lord of the Rings films. You know what else you could make with $300 million?
- 2 The Dark Knights
- 3 The Departeds
- 4 Inglorious Basterds
- 4 Surrogates (talk about avatars!)
- 5 The Matrixs
- 6 Sweeney Todds (I don't even like musicals and I liked this)
- 6 Changelings
- 8 Burn After Readings
- 9 Sevens
- 10 Million Dollar Babys
- 10 9s
- 12 Mystic Rivers
- 15 Silence of the Lambs
- 30 Dogmas
All of these films are better than Avatar. Think about the cool scenes, the awesome dialgoue, the powerful effects...then think about Ava-fucking-tar. I would want to see more of all of these types of films (done right, not done like the clones that did indeed follow some of them). It takes an enormous amount of hubris to commit a dying industry to an enterprise like this, especially when that enterprise is wack. Cameron is a dick. He could have made any film he wanted, but opted to make a film that clogs up the coffers for anywhere from 3-4 huge budget films to 30 or more low budget films.