A riddle,from a poem by me :P

Oct 24, 2007 16:02

I wrote a poem yesterday.It was inspired by one of my most precious fictional heroes.Don't laugh,I have fictional heroes.And I am not ashamed of my this character feature.Fictonal heroes have made great good to my life and helped me decide on many many occasions ( Read more... )

creative writing, poetry, riddle, opinions, 221b

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Comments 19

trixiebette October 24 2007, 17:23:43 UTC
*scratches head* Sherlock Holmes?

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schneeglockchen October 24 2007, 17:39:39 UTC
Ohh...Hehe.You so got that from the 221b tag :P

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trixiebette October 24 2007, 17:43:35 UTC
What is 221b? :S

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schneeglockchen October 24 2007, 17:48:08 UTC
How did you get it then?

ps. 221B Baker Street ;)

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trixiebette October 27 2007, 18:05:19 UTC
Are you sure?

Well, the number of syllables in your strophes is inconsistent.

He sits on a high stool
Comfortably, by the fire
Just looking well, keeping cool
Waits for new ones to hire

You have 6 syllables in your first verse, 8 in your second and 7 in your third and fourth. I think "Waiting for new ones to hire" would have sounded better, so you'd get 8 syllables out of it - the same number as the verse it rhymes with.

He's got fresh deals in his pocket - 8
To consider and ponder - 7
Smokes his pipe and many more - 7
As his friend stares in wonder - 7

"To consider and to ponder" sounds better for some reason. Maybe it's because you can have some sort of pattern in syllables then.

When he finally relaxes - 8
it's to astonish all - 6
Carefree, smiling - 4
He calls it a close-call - 6 ( ... )

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schneeglockchen October 30 2007, 13:29:04 UTC
Free verse:P 8-) I like rhymes but I am not that fond of counting syllables.:P
What's wrong with writing about a fictional character,may I ask? :P

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trixiebette October 31 2007, 08:41:04 UTC
Literary commentaries, nothing. Poems, that's a bit cheesy. :P

Saying it's free verse is a poor excuse for not respecting rhythm. :P Free verse is supposed to be something special, reserved for those earth shattering revelations I mentioned or some clever dissection of sentiments. If you want to write a poem about a fictional character, respect the rules. :P

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schneeglockchen October 31 2007, 11:32:51 UTC
I am not ashamed of having fictional heroes;)

I don't have to respect any rules :P It's my creative territory.Seriously. 8-)

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