Jul 04, 2010 09:58
DUSTIN BADGER MISSING!
The teen sensation of the new millennium disappeared after a concert, and millions of girls were in a panic (except for the ones at the midnight showings of Moonlight: Darkness). Where could he be? Who could find him?
“Just a few more minutes, ducky, and you’ll be a proper lad, singing proper music. Goodbye, auto-tuning and hello, Herman’s Hermits and Paul McCartney!” The Mad Mod, looking his real age but spry, has Dustin tied to a chair, with the Hypnoscreen before them and with huge old-school stereo headphones over the boy’s ears. He struggles but the ever-increasing roar of “Mrs. Brown, You’ve Got a Lovely Daughter” is sapping his will. Soon, the process would be complete. “You can’t fight it, boy. Not you and not a single member of your gene-“
“BOOYAH!” Suddenly, there is a door where there used to be only wall.
“That’s supposed to be ‘Titans Go!’” But there’s no time for Cy to scowl at Beast Boy. The team leaps into action. And the Mod presses a button on his walking stick.
“Not this time, my rebellious foes.” A set of speakers lowers from the ceiling and strobe lights flash.
I am he as you are me and you are he
and we are all the Mad Mod’s!
See how you fall, bad children one and all
You’re losing
You’re losing.
The heroes try to fight it, but the power of the Mod’s evil song parody is too much. “Oh glorious day, I will finally stop the lot of you! All four...wait. Where’s the fifth? Where’s the fifth?”
There is a hand on the Mod’s shoulder, and that hand turns the old man around, to see Red Star. “I think,” the red-haired man says, “that your taste in music is appalling.”
“How can you resist this? No teen alive can resist my song of control.”
“I am older than I look. Now, please sleep.” Red Star punches the Mad Mod with just enough force to knock him out, and then fires bolts of flame at the speakers and the Hypnoscreen. “Comrades, you are okay?”
“We are fine,” Raven mutters. “Except for Beast Boy.” Who remains in thrall and who begins to sing…
“He’s a well respected man about town, doing things oh so conservatively…”
“Star, you know what to do,” Cy states as he removes the headphones from Dustin.
“Do I have to?”
“Someone has to do it.”
“Very well.” She stands in front of Beast Boy and makes the loudest fake burp anyone has ever heard. This is following immediately by gales of laughter from the green teen.
“Ah, nuts! He did it again!”
“He did it to all of us,” concedes Cy. “Should have seen that coming. Or worn earplugs. Or come in one at a time.”
“We have still rescued the boy and stopped the villain. Not bad for my first day with the team, yes?” Red Star was trying to not to look too proud, but Cy knew that the Russian was ready to burst but didn’t want to make his new teammates - and their new leader - felt any worse for walking into a trap.
“Yeah, Red, not bad. But you really mean it that that stuff didn’t work on you?”
“No. I just closed my eyes. And followed his voice while he was cackling. I thank you for the diversion.”
“Er, no problem.” By now Cy has undone the ropes. And sees the teen star slowly coming out of it. “What’s going on? Where am…oh wow! The Teen Titans! Did you come for my concert? Hey, this isn’t my dressing room? Where’s security?”
“It’s a long story,” Cy suggests.
“The Mad Mod kidnapped you and tried to make you a Beatle. Or a Hermit. Or a Monkee. We saved you!” BB beams.
“OK, not so long. But everything’s…fine?” Dustin isn’t paying any attention to Cy. He’s looking at the girls.
“Oh…hi…you’re Starfire…and Raven. Hi.” He stumbles to his feet. “You saved me?”
“The Titans saved you,” Raven corrects. “We should get you home.”
“Uh, yeah, sure.” Dustin seems a bit surprised for some reason. “You don’t want to hang out?”
“We don’t ‘hang out’,” Raven says a bit huffily.
By now the police special super villain unit is on the scene, taking away a groggy Mad Mod. Dustin’s handlers, agents, and family, followed by the press, rush in next. “Uh gang, I think we should split.” Cy is not in the mood for the press. Or to answer questions about where Robin is.
“Hey, thanks for saving me. From…whatever it was I was being saved from. If you want back stage passes, I can swing it.”
“No thank you,” Star says. “You are kind but your music sounds like two Garthian eldercows under a half moon. Well tuned Garthian eldercows, though.”
“We gotta go,” Cy mutters as he grabs Star and rushes the team out the way they came in. Dustin just stares. No girl has ever turned him down before. And tonight, two did. And one dissed his music.
He thinks he’s in love with Starfire.