A very special ficbit of Bleach
This story has a moral. I'll let you figure it out for yourself.
Heavy breathing.
"...Just put it in quick, huh...?"
"Yeah..."
"Mm, like that..."
More heavy breathing.
And, on the other side of the door, silence.
"You know what this is?" says Keigo finally. "This is a classic setup. We go in there, and they're... I don't know, fixing a chair leg, or something. And we all feel totally stupid for assuming they were doing something else."
Mizuiro shakes his head. "I don't know. Sounds pretty kinky in there to me."
"No, he's right," says Rukia. "It happens all the time in tv shows."
"You guys are all nuts," says Tatsuki.
"We'll see who's nuts!" Keigo resolutely takes the door handle.
The door swings open to reveal, of course, Chad fucking Ichigo over the bed. There is a very awkward moment where nobody does anything. In the end it is Tatsuki who grabs the door handle again and slams the door shut.
"Tv is *not* real life," she says firmly.
"That was pretty hot," says Mizuiro.
Keigo rubs his eyes until they go red, apparently trying to erase the images burnt into them. "Shut up. You're all fucking nuts."
"It did have a certain aesthetic appeal," comments Rukia after a moment of thought.
"SHUT UP."
"I wonder-"
"SHUT UP!"
And they never spoke of it again.
***
I'd been wanting to do something on this premise for years, I only had to figure out which fandom it would make sense in. Bleach took the bullet for everything else. And we honour it.
Uh, don't look now, my gigantic Chad/Ichigo bias is showing!
Heavy breathing.
"...Just put it in quick, huh...?"
"Yeah..."
"Mm, like that..."
More heavy breathing.
And, on the other side of the door, silence.
"You know what this is?" says Keigo finally. "This is a classic setup. We go in there, and they're... I don't know, fixing a chair leg, or something. And we all feel totally stupid for assuming they were doing something else."
Mizuiro shakes his head. "I don't know. Sounds pretty kinky in there to me."
"No, he's right," says Rukia. "It happens all the time in tv shows."
"You guys are all nuts," says Tatsuki.
"We'll see who's nuts!" Keigo resolutely takes the door handle.
The door swings open to reveal, of course, Chad fucking Ichigo over the bed. There is a very awkward moment where nobody does anything. In the end it is Tatsuki who grabs the door handle again and slams the door shut.
"Tv is *not* real life," she says firmly.
"That was pretty hot," says Mizuiro.
Keigo rubs his eyes until they go red, apparently trying to erase the images burnt into them. "Shut up. You're all fucking nuts."
"It did have a certain aesthetic appeal," comments Rukia after a moment of thought.
"SHUT UP."
"I wonder-"
"SHUT UP!"
And they never spoke of it again.
***
I'd been wanting to do something on this premise for years, I only had to figure out which fandom it would make sense in. Bleach took the bullet for everything else. And we honour it.
Uh, don't look now, my gigantic Chad/Ichigo bias is showing!