Chapter One
Title: 10 Yrs, chapter one
Pairing: Rodney/John
Link to Masterpost
CHAPTER ONE: VICTORY
John lies in bed, his head resting on Rodney’s bare stomach as McKay reads some sort of computerized report from one of his many minions in the science department that he heads up on Atlantis. John’s mind is quiet and relaxed in post-coital bliss, the familiar smell of sex and Rodney filling the air as he lounges their as if he had not a care in the galaxy. But at the back if his mind a darkness is gnawing at his serenity. Yesterday they had celebrated their victory in wiping out the Wraith. Those who were not dead and rotting were successfully humanized enough that they no longer possessed the ability to drain life from humans and now ate regular mortal food. While it shortened their lifespan considerably it was serving its purpose by improving the quality and length of everyone else’s life in the Pegasus galaxy. Treaties were in place with Wraith-human hybrids such as Todd, and Elizabeth had decreed that they would dial home in the morning. The base was alive with apprehension and excitement. John couldn’t help but think that his feelings were more negative than positive. After all Earth meant military regulations like obeying people with more authority than him - which was fair few people since technically his rank was only that of a Major as no one here had the authority to change it officially - and ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ and fraternisation regs. Basically, rules that he would be expected to follow that would keep him away from Rodney. And John knew that after ten years he couldn’t do that. No matter the cost.
“Stop worrying. That’s my job.” Rodney demanded.
“I’m not worrying. I’m thinking.” John corrected.
“Huh, well that’s also my job. You can just lie there and look pretty.” Rodney told him, giving him a condescending pat on his head.
John sent him a half hearted glare. “Or I could go get my gun and shoot things. After all, that’s my job right?” He suggested.
“No, no, that’s okay.” Rodney gulped. “But seriously John, stop worrying. It’ll make you go gray and then I’ll have to be the pretty one and we both know that’ll never work… what are you worrying about? You should be excited. We get to go home tomorrow.” Rodney babbled, sounding pretty unexcited and worried himself.
John shifted so he could look into his partner’s eyes. “You still think of Earth as home?” He asked, frowning.
“No… no it’s just…. You have a brother and an ex-wife and old Air Force buddies… why? Don’t you think of Earth as home?” Rodney asked, his blue eyes shining with his own fears and insecurities.
“No,” John denied. “Atlantis is my home, it has been for more than nine years now. And you’re my home too. Of course I miss people back on Earth but I can live without them. Honestly I’m not sure I could live without you.” He admitted.
Rodney beamed a smile of honest happiness and relief. “Thank god because I feel the same way!” He declared.
“That’s because you love me.” John smiled smugly.
“Or because I’m so used to having you around that I’m not sure what to do when you’re not here.” Rodney joked lightly.
“Either way I get sex.” John pointed out snuggling up to his lover. He was planning to sleep but truthfully, as soon as he closed his eyes the darkness seemed to overwhelm him, taunting him with is own fears that going back to Earth would be the worst thing for all. He was so scared.
“Sssh.” Rodney whispered comfortingly. “Just listen to my heartbeat.” He told him and John pressed his head against Rodney’s chest focusing on the comforting thumpa-thumpa of his lover’s heart, soothing and reassuring.
“Why am I panicking and you’re so calm?” John asked. Usually it was the other way around.
“You think I’m calm? You should have seen me earlier. I kept dropping things and stuttering. My heart was going like the celebration drums on Harvest night on P4-XX552L. I thought I was going to have a heart attack and the Doc had to prescribe some pills to calm me down. But honestly I feel better knowing you’re panicking.” Rodney admitted.
“Hey!” John whined, not liking the sound of that.
“No, not in a mean way. It’s just… if you’re panicking it means you’re afraid of losing me, of losing this. And that means you really do love me.” Rodney said, sounding very self-conscious.
“Of course I love you. I have for more many years and that’s not going to stop just because I’m back on Earth.” John told him.
“Good. I love you too. Now can we go to sleep now?” Rodney asked and John rolled his eyes, nodding in agreement. Despite this, neither slept that night. They just lay there listening to the sound of their hearts beating and the waves beating against the city exterior. The sounds of home.
Next Chapter: Chapter Two