Walk a Mile

Apr 30, 2013 23:33

Title: Walk a Mile
Fandom: Hawaii 5-0
Rating: PG13
Spoilers: none
Prompt: bodyswap

Hearing Danny's furious words coming out of his mouth was hardly the weirdest part of Steve's day. No, that honor went to when he woke in Danny's body, to see his best friend's face staring out at him from the mirror. But, it was quickly becoming a fast second.

"I fail to see how this is my fault," Steve said, trying not to wince at how strange it sounded hearing Danny's voice when he spoke.

Also, he'd unconsciously adopted Danny's calm, dealing-with-crazy-Steve tone, one that he'd heard more than enough to recognize it, and how bizarre was that? Was it like a muscle memory thing, Danny's vocal inflections? Was he going to get the chance to see one of his infamous 'faces' from Danny at some point?

"Everything!" Danny's half-hysterical shout brought Steve out of his thoughts. "Practically everything bad that has happened to me on this godforsaken island, this pineapple-infested hellhole, can be traced back to you!"

"Oh, now you're just exaggerating," Steve protested, but if anything, his words only seemed to make Danny even more angry.

"Exaggerating?" Danny's voice hit a particularly strident tone that Steve wasn't even aware of his vocal cords being capable of. "I'm exaggerating, he says! The first time we worked together, you got me shot! You store hand grenades in the glove box of my car! I don't even drive my own car!"

He trailed off, glaring at Steve, and yep, there was the Aneurysm Face that Danny always accused him of. And not that he was ever going to admit it to him, but Steve could kind of see what he was talking about.

"You didn't actually list that many examples," Steve felt compelled to point out, and whoa, there was Aneurysm Face, version 2.0.

"Do you want more?" Danny asked, sounding exasperated, and Steve shook his head.

"No," he said, quickly, figuring he'd done enough to wind his partner up for one morning. "No, I think I've heard enough, thanks."

Danny subsided, muttering something under his breath about voodoo and witch doctors. Steve knew that ranting was Danny's preferred method of stress relief, but he couldn't resist just one, last remark.

"You know that Hawaii doesn't have voodoo or witch doctors, right?" he asked.

"Steven, do not even start with me, right now - shit."

Steve turned around at the dread in his partner's voice, and then grimaced when he saw Chin and Kono standing in the doorway. The cousins were staring at Danny and him like they were exhibits at the zoo. Kono had a slightly disturbing grin on her face, the kind she got right before going after a suspect. It was more than a little disconcerting, being the focus of that look.

"Um, how long have you two been standing there?" he asked, weakly, and Kono just grinned even wider.

"Long enough, brah," Chin replied, with a laugh. "Long enough."

He trailed Kono into the room, as she circled Danny in Steve's body with an all-too-gleeful smirk on her face. Steve wasn't sure what was coming next, but he was sure it wasn't going to be good.

"How's it feel to finally be taller than me?"

Yeah, like that. Steve watched his own eyes darken with anger, and Danny crossed his arms over his chest in a habitual gesture.

"Watch it," he growled. "I'm in the ninja assassin's body, now, and with his muscle memory, I'm fairly certain I can take you."

Kono just chuckled. "Yeah, why don't you ask Steve about that?" She was still laughing when she turned and went into to her office.

Danny cocked an eyebrow, looking over at Steve. Steve suddenly felt trapped.

"You're shorter than I thought," he blustered in a weak attempt to distract his partner, but Danny had scented blood in the water and he wasn't about to let anything put him off.

"Now," he said, as a slow smile spread over his face, "what's this about Kono kicking your ass?"

fandom: hawaii 5-0

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