3am

Mar 27, 2008 10:54

Title: 3am
Character’s: Kate, Charlie, mentions of Aaron
Spoilers: up to Eggtown
Summary: After Kate returns home from her meeting with Jack in TTLG, Charlie visits her unexpectedly and tells her that they have to go back to the island. Written for charlielives challenge #4: future Charlie.
Disclaimer: chances are this is never going to happen on the show so...I guess it’s safe to say that I don’t own Lost. The lyrics in the cut are from 3am by Matchbox 20.

~*~
Kate was exhausted by the time she got home from the airport - emotionally as well as physically. She hadn’t seen Jack in a long time and she wasn’t entirely prepared for just how messed up he is on the drugs. The majority of the memories she has of him is from on the island where he was their leader, their doctor, steadfast and strong. She’s shocked at just how quickly he’s spiralled down.

And really - who would’ve ever thought that coming home would have turned out so badly for him and so amazingly good for her? She’s actually happy for the first time in her life - truly happy. She has a purpose, a reason not to run and she thinks that she might have finally settled down. And it’s all because of Aaron.

He was asleep when she got home, his nanny sitting just outside his door on a chair. He always seems to know when she’s gone out and he pines a lot when she does. It’s why Kate normally doesn’t like leaving him at night - he never sleeps well when she’s gone. He’s been having nightmares lately too and to be honest she’s a little bit worried about him.

But he seems to be sleeping soundly tonight and so she sends Tanya off to bed, (she has to have a live in nanny - it’s too difficult to not have her living there what with all the times that Kate has had to leave unexpectedly) kisses her sleeping son tenderly and then heads to bed herself, leaving her door cracked just in case he calls out to her during the night.

The alarm clock reads 3am when there is a sudden banging on the front door that Kate hears even from upstairs. Groggily she wonders who would be calling on her at this hour and she rolls over and shuts her eyes again, hoping that they’ll go away.

No such luck. They bang on the door again, more insistently this time, and then they ring the door bell. Kate hears the sound of footsteps outside her door - obviously Tanya is going to answer it. Kate groans and rubs her eyes. It’s probably Jack she thinks bitterly as she retrieves her robe and begins to head downstairs too. What the hell does he think he’s doing coming here at this time?

She runs into Tanya halfway down the staircase. She too is wrapped in a robe and she looks confused and tired.

“I was about to come up and get you,” she says, relieved, and they head downstairs together, Tanya filling Kate in on their mystery guest. “There’s a man outside. He says he knows you but I’ve never seen him before so I don’t know who he could be…”

“It’s not Jack is it?” Kate asks, frowning.

“Definitely not Jack,” Tanya says emphatically. “This guy’s much too short.”

“Short?” Kate repeats, non plussed, her mind racing, trying to figure out who on earth it could possibly be if it isn’t Jack and they aren’t tall...

“Do you want me to wait for you?” Tanya asks but Kate shakes her head.

“Thanks but I’ll be okay,” she grins slightly. “It’s probably just somebody wanting my autograph or something. You go back to bed - I’ve interrupted your night enough as it is. ”

Tanya hovers uncertainly for a moment at the foot of the stairs but then heads obediently back up to her room again, giving Kate the moment she needs to take a breath before she opens the door to whoever this is.

She opens the door warily, keeping an eye on the umbrella beside the door in case she needs to use it as a weapon. Her visitor however isn’t even looking at her - he’s staring out at her front garden, his back to her. He’s pale, Caucasian, and the light on the porch is casting a dappled glow over his leather jacket, his dark jeans, his close cropped hair.

She doesn’t recognise him.

“Hello?” she calls out cautiously and he turns, the dim porch light catching his face for one brief instant. Kate pulls the door open a little further, gaping as she peers closer at him, making sure that her eye’s aren’t playing tricks on her.

“Hi Kate. Sorry for the horrible time...” he says apologetically, taking a step forward. His face falls in and out of shadows and she honestly can’t believe what she’s seeing. Impossible! “But it couldn’t really be helped. I didn’t want to rock up when Aaron might have been awake. That would’ve been a bit awkward.”

Kate stares at him, frozen in her disbelief. If the face wasn’t enough to convince here then there’s the voice too - pitch perfect. She’d have known that voice anywhere, the accent, the lilt…

“You can’t be here,” she says, her voice is surprisingly harsh. “You’re dead!”

He chuckles - no doubt at the hysterical undertone in her voice. “How very observant of you. Yes I am dead Kate but I’m also here - very real and very able to have a much needed chat with you.”

“This isn’t real,” she gabbles, panicking even more now and backpedalling into the house. “You’re not here.”

“Wait...”

And then his hand flashes out and touches the back of hers gently and Kate has to stop herself from bursting out into tears because unless she’s having a very vivid hallucination, Charlie is here with her, standing on her front porch and she hasn’t seen him since…since…

“You died,” she whispers again, her voice choked as she sags against the doorframe.

“I did,” he affirms softly, taking her hand in earnest and squeezing it gently. “But I need to talk to you - okay? So how about you stop trying to slam the door in my face, come out here and we can sit down.”

Kate leaves the door slightly ajar behind her and comes out onto the porch tentatively. Charlie takes her gallantly by the elbow and escorts her to the stairs. There they sit together, shoulder to shoulder and the two of them gaze out for a long moment. There’s a strange car parked on the verge. Do ghosts drive cars she wonders? She looks sideways at Charlie who is now watching her carefully and she shakes her head in amazement.

“This is too crazy.”

Charlie nods but doesn’t laugh.

“Yeah I know. It’s weird for me too.”

“So…what are you?” Kate asks then ventures a few guesses. “A ghost? Hallucination?” Charlie shakes his head at both but his brow furrows and he actually looks a little confused.

“It’s...kind of hard to explain,” he says falteringly. “And I’m not here to talk to you about that anyway.”

“Well what are you here for then?”

“Always straight to the point,” Charlie drops his chin onto his shoulder and smiles faintly at her. “I’m here to talk about Aaron.”

Kate’s blood freezes.

“What about him?”

“He needs to know,” Charlie says softly. “You can’t keep on pretending that you’re his mother when you’re not.” Kate is silent, her stomach twisting and roiling. “And he needs his real mother Kate.”

“Claire’s dead,” Kate snaps. “She died on the island. I’m his mother now.”

“She didn’t die,” Charlie says sharply. “She’s still there Kate and she’s never stopped missing her baby - not in all this time. She’s waiting with the others, still hoping that one day you might find your way back and save them all.”

“We can’t go back,” Kate protests. “We can’t!”

“You weren’t supposed to leave,” Charlie shakes his head. “You have to go back Kate - it’s the only way to set things right again.”

“What’s wrong with the way things are?” she cries. “Dammit Charlie, I’m actually happy for the first time in my life! What’s so wrong about that?”

“What’s wrong is that it’s at the expense of other people!” Charlie says angrily. “You might have no problem with raising someone else’s child and lying to him every day of his existence but sooner or later he’s going to find out the truth and then you’re going to break his heart.”

“How would he ever find out the truth?” Kate storms to her feet and Charlie pushes himself up as well and glares at her. It’s almost absurd - they’ve always been quite evenly matched for height but something in Charlie’s eyes is more dangerous than the angry upset in hers. “Why would I ever tell him the truth? He’s safer this way - the less he knows about the island the better.”

“Your parents lied to you,” Charlie says suddenly and Kate’s jaw drops. “For years you never even knew that Sam Austen wasn’t your real father, and then when you found out that they’d been lying to you for your entire life you went and blew up your real dad! Do you really want Aaron to feel that same sort of betrayal from you?”

Kate sinks slowly back onto the steps again, her knees crumbling with shock and her tears collapsing suddenly down her face.

“How could you know that?” she asks faintly.

“I know because I know,” he says impatiently. “Just like I know that you’ve got to go back again. Jack was right Kate - it’s time to tell the world the truth.”

Her vision blurs with tears and she sobs as he kneels beside her and places a gentle hand on her shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” he says softly. “I probably understand better than anyone - I loved him like he was my own as well. But this isn’t the right place for him and you can’t just keep on pretending the way you are.”

And with that he stands and goes to step off the porch...

“Wait!” Kate says suddenly, pushing herself to her feet and reaching out for him. “Don’t you even want to see him?”

Charlie looks up at her from his position on the bottom step, almost pityingly she thinks, and he smiles ruefully.

“Go back inside Kate,” he says softly. “I have to go.”

“Charlie...”

He steps up to her again, presses a gentle kiss to her cheek and then pulls her close to him in a gentle half hug. Kate’s eyes flutter shut and she feels her knees go wobbly again - this time with shock at the unexpected affection.

“You know what you have to do to make things right,” Charlie murmurs, his hands trailing down her arms and then falling away. “They need you Kate.”

When she finally opens her eyes he’s gone along with the mysterious car from the verge - and even the warm thickness of her robe isn’t enough to keep out the cold.
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