SHOP MANAGER: Sara, what are you doing? The shop manager presses the on/off button and nothing happens. The machine continues to spew out the epigraph. The shop manager lifts the copy machine lid and discovers that there is nothing there!
SARA (voice over): I don't know why I thought it would. They follow me everywhere, spitting venom from every phone, every computer, fax. I guess I thought copiers were safe because they don't connect to any kind of network... But no. Fucked again.
CUT TO: Sara and Eli's apartment. Eli is playing his guitar, Sara comes into the apartment, slams the door. Takes a moment to breathe calmly.
SARA: The good news is I've decided to keep the uniform [gesturing to the copy shop emblem on her shirt] and use it to sneak into various copy shops around the city, stealing paper goods and toner, which I will sell below market price to inner city schools, while the insurance company reimburses the stores for their lost merchandise. Everyone's a winner.
ELI [plucking a chord]: I don't think they insure paper, right? Paper, you know, burns easy.
SARA: The bad news is even copiers fucking hate me. Argh. [slumps into bean bag chair]
ELI [switches to 12-bar blues]: I don't think they hate you, you know.
SARA [looking over unconvinced from bean bag chair]: Yeah?
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The machine continues to spew out the epigraph. The shop manager lifts the copy machine lid and discovers that there is nothing there!
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SARA: The good news is I've decided to keep the uniform [gesturing to the copy shop emblem on her shirt] and use it to sneak into various copy shops around the city, stealing paper goods and toner, which I will sell below market price to inner city schools, while the insurance company reimburses the stores for their lost merchandise. Everyone's a winner.
ELI [plucking a chord]: I don't think they insure paper, right? Paper, you know, burns easy.
SARA: The bad news is even copiers fucking hate me. Argh. [slumps into bean bag chair]
ELI [switches to 12-bar blues]: I don't think they hate you, you know.
SARA [looking over unconvinced from bean bag chair]: Yeah?
ELI: Yeah. They just don't like you very much.
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