Sherlock Fanfiction: If I Caught You

[saki101]

Title: If I Caught You
Author: Saki101
Genre: slash
Rating: PG-13
Length: ~1100 words
Warning: AU, post The Reichenbach Fall
Disclaimer: I don't own BBC's Sherlock and no money is being made.
Author's notes: This is a continuation of The Other Experiments Series which forms an AU frame for the Experiments Series. If I Caught You follows

Comments

[svetlanacat4]

"because he couldn't whistle when he smiled." Love the line...
This story "à deux voix" is amazing!

[saki101]

Keeping the POV sorted is always a challenge for me and switching between the two, but not letting them cross over or letting anyone else's slip in is an even bigger one.

Have you seen any or all of second season yet?

[svetlanacat4]

We'll have as a Spring gift! It's scheduled on wednesday the 21st. Can't wait!

[snailbones]

Oh, you're weaving this so beautifully!

(And so fast too - are you getting any sleep? *g*)

[saki101]

No, I seem possessed. This usually indicates a RL situation that is being avoided or which requires frequent rest stops in Neverneverland to deal with! Either that or I am actually possessed! :-)

What did you think of the scifi detail revealed in the final paragraph? Did it seem to fit in to where things were going or did it make you pause?

[snailbones]

LOL - I do love your avoidance techniques *g*

No, I think it all fits together beautifully - I'm getting the feeling of Sherlock as a benevolent, advanced being, who is still vulnerable for all his intelligence. I also forgot to say thank you for the Beethoven link too - I've had it playing away in the background. ♥

[chapbook]

I like the double meaning in the chapter title: John's dream and the spliced DNA?

I wonder how Mike is going to get John to take those tests. More home-cooked meals? And of course Sherlock is not ruling out drugging John, but Mike is not an automaton, and will think up something, I bet.

John's dream: I like it in part because it seems like it is more than a dream or wish-fulfillment. It feels like something else is going on as well, considering we know why John is ill.

The structure and timing in this chapter is effective. The parallel (but not exactly the same) experiences John and Sherlock have (trying to get close to each other through the magic of textiles and skin cells, the semen): wonderful! Again, I like how not everything is said, that you have to read between the lines to ascertain what's happening.

[saki101]

Thank you! I was fond of the title! ;-)

I've posted the next section just now. See what you think of what Mike does.

The dream was my favourite part, so I have no objectivity about it. You are completely right; it is more than a dream. I was trying to describe what is happening between them by describing John's perception of a particularly significant incident in the process. I thought that his mind would translate what he was experiencing into familiar images, but the intensity would remain.

The structure and timing in this chapter is effective.

*huge sigh of relief*

Thank you again!!

[elmey]

Somehow I'm not surprised the sheet showed up again :D

I like the way the story is developing; I like that you don't throw everything out up front, but we get hints and allusions and have to work a little bit to figure out what's going on. And the fact of the DNA splicing comes up so casually, that it takes a second to catch it and go Oh!

Johns dream is both terrifying and comforting, that odd combination that dreams can be; John was happy, a strange and fair reaction.

[saki101]

Yes, hard to ignore the sheet and the possibility of it falling!

I got mixed feedback about the slow reveal and the obscure clues, but on balance it was positive. Of course, I had great fun with them. ;-)

I always have trepidations about parts that I really, really like and John's dream is one of them, maybe the main one. I was trying to capture his precarious emotional state and a dream seemed the only way, although I suppose drunkenness or a drugged state might have worked, too.

♥