Issues: The Beginning, Ch2
Title: Issues: The Beginning
Fandom: Issues
Characters/pairings: Ensemble
Rating: PG-13
Summary: A group of college students find a way to travel to other worlds.
Warnings: Mary-Sue self insert with bad characterizations.
Notes: Old writing, from waaaaay back in the day, in it's mostly original format (very minor corrections may have been made)
o o o
The first sensation Teri felt was an overwhelming dizziness. The next was that she was lying on an uneven surface with something poking her back. Her laptop was still clutched in her arms. She realized that she could hear birds. Strange.
She opened her eyes. Several dim figures holding bows were standing around her, arrows aimed at the head. Behind them were trees so thick, only a little sunlight filtered through them. As her eyes got used to the gloom,
(Mirk,)
she saw that she was lying on the forest floor, surrounded by a ring of eight men
(They're elves)
who had their bows trained at her head. She heard a groan from behind her and four of the men
(They're elves, not men.)
(Impossible.)
(Admit it, you're in Middle-Earth, about to get shot by an elf.)
(Stop it.)
aimed their bows behind her, where it sounded like Missy was waking up. Teri shook her head to get rid of her mental argument and slowly stood up. Four of the arrows followed her. She looked at the bow-men
(Bow-ELVES)
(Fuck off)
then turned around and helped her sister up. As she pulled the younger woman to her feet she whispered "Let me talk, I'll handle this" in her ear. Missy nodded. They turned back to the bow-men
(Bow-Elves, they're elves)
(Knock it off with the elves, they don't exist)
who hadn't dropped their weapons an inch. Teri studied them one by one, trying to not let her fear show on her face. Then, surprising everyone, (but most of all herself), she bowed low and said "Many days and pleasant night, my Lords." Missy followed her bow after a moment but wisely kept her mouth shut.
The elves looked a little taken aback at the manners the two strange women showed. They looked at each other then one of their number stepped forward, lowered his bow and bowed in return. "My Ladies," he said, his voice fair and musical "We wish the same to you. But, pray, tell us, who are you and of what race. For you do not resemble any Elf, Man, Dwarf or Hobbit I have ever seen."
"My Lords," Teri said standing "I am Teri, daughter of Eugene the Second. This is my sister Missy. We are of the race of men, though I believe we are very far from home right now. Am I correct in thinking that this is Mirkwood of Middle-Earth, now known as Greenwood?" The elves (who's Teri's self-conscious had convinced her were real by now) nodded. "Alas," she continued "I feared, yet hoped it was so. For I have long desired to see this country, yet was always too far away to travel here. Please tell me, does King Thranduil still reign?"
The elf who had spoke first nodded. "Yes, my Father's reign still continues."
"Father's." Teri said with a slight frown on her face "And which son of Thranduil might you be?"
"I am Legolas Greenleaf, at your service my Lady." He replied. The sisters kept their jaws from dropping. Legolas. The elf of whom so many fanfics had been written, their own among them. They both had seen many pictures of what the elf may or may not have looked like, and of course there was the movie version with Orlando Bloom, but none of them had come even close to what the elf truly looked like, if this was in fact real. But they all had been right about two things. He was blond and he was HOT.
Teri bowed again. "It is an honor to meet you, Lord Legolas." She said, noting that Missy bowed again as well. Just keep your mouth shut. Teri thought as hard as she could at her sister.
Legolas looked slightly amused. "An honor? My Lady, what have I done to deserve such honor?" Teri fished around for a moment for the right way to answer but was instead saved by another elf.
"Come Legolas," laughed a dark haired elf "Tales of the war and your part in the Fellowship must have reached the home of these Ladies. Do not pretend you have no idea what they are talking of. You shall go down in legend. Now, why do you not invite them to meet your father and we shall see what goes from there."
The two women from Michigan walked through Greenwood with an entourage of singing elves. Teri could only catch a few words of the song and Missy none of them, but neither cared. It was beautiful. Soon after leaving the small clearing where they had been found they had hit the path they were following. The elves sometimes walked on the path, sometimes slipping off into the trees then coming back. Only Legolas stayed with the two girls the whole time, singing.
"Teri, what the hell did you do?" Missy hissed, in Japanese so the elf wouldn't know what she said, "We're in mother fucking Middle-EARTH! What the hell did that thing do? For that matter, is this real?"
"I'm not sure" The older woman replied in the same language, for once glad they had all taken it "As far as I can figure, one of three things happened. The first is that this is the best damn hoax I've ever seen. The second is that there was more than seasoning in my ramen noodles and I'm tripping out of my gourd. The third…..well, the third is that this is real. That we are in Greenwood, walking with Legolas the Elvin prince." At the mention of his name the elf looked up sharply, but not understanding the language went back to his song.
Missy looked down at her sister with disbelief, mixed with a little fear, on her round face. "So, what do you think it is? If this is a trip, then how can we share it? If this is a hoax, it's a damn good one."
"I think it's real" Teri said quietly. "I mean, look, no wait, smell. Listen. No cars, no airplanes, no smell of gas or oil or city. No tire tracks through the woods. These are old trees, planted hundreds of years ago, there's not many forest's left in the world like this and they're all very far from home. But look, look at them."
Both women looked at the elves around them. They were singing, sometimes doing a small dance along the path, laughing, climbing trees. The women noticed that while leaves covered the path, the only real footsteps they could hear were theirs. The elves didn't crunch the leaves but instead ran on top of the layer, light as the wind itself. Also, the elves had a look, a feeling, about them, a sort of, of etherealness. They felt like the stuff of dreams made real.
"I think" Teri said quietly "That that is a bit hard to fake. And this is too clean to be a trip. Somehow, I- I believe this is real. Don't ask me how, I just do." Though she couldn't explain it to her sister, the thing that cinched it for her was her thirst and slight exhaustion. Somehow she didn't think that she would feel like that in a trip or a dream. And this was too real to be a hoax. No, it was real.
"Okaaaaaay.." Missy said slowly. "But I have another question. How did you learn to speak like that?"
Teri grinned "I've been reading and studying Tolkien for years, remember. I learned on how to speak Westron. Apparently it has come in handy"
The whole party fell silent as they entered a clearing. A bridged stream cut it in half. Across the bridge was a stone wall that looked like a hill that had been cut away. In the center was a large wooden double door. At either side sat an elf with a bow. They sprang to their feet as the party crossed the bridge. The elf to the right of the door, a slim female with white-blond hair stepped forward. Both guards bowed low.
"Fair days, Prince Legolas." Said the blond "May I ask who your visitors are?"
Legolas returned the bow. "Fair days, Èllièn. My guests are Teri and Missy, daughters of Eugene the Second. I am taking them to meet my father." Èllièn bowed again and Legolas and his two guests passed through the door.
The two women looked around with awe at the Elvin-King’s halls. A smooth round hall led slightly downward, decorated with tapestries on either side. After a ways it opened into a large, beautiful hall. A large dais sat at the side opposite the hallway. On the dais was a large chair. In the chair sat a fair faced elf with long white-blond hair. His face was both happy and sad, both grave and cheerful. He looked at the strange women with interest as the group entered and bowed to the floor.
"Father," Legolas said, standing "While in the forest, we saw a bright light. When we ran to it, we discovered these two women on the forest floor and a blue light fading from them. They are Teri and Missy, daughters of Eugene the Second. We have not asked them where they are from."
"I see." Said king Thranduil "Well, my Ladies, can you explain how you appeared in the middle of the Greenwood?
“ My lords," Teri said, standing, thinking real, real fast. "We are apprentices to a wizard, back in our home land of America. We were testing a spell I had created when the next thing I knew was waking up in the forest." She shrugged, put a sheepish expression on her face, and silently thanked Lorin for the acting lessons "While this is not the result I hoped to achieve, I am not disappointed in coming here." Flattery never hurt anyone.
"A strange tale" Thranduil said "I have never heard of Amerika in all of my years, but there are many unexplored lands over the seas I know nothing about. You will have to forgive us for being suspicious, but appearing out of nowhere is quite strange, and until we know if you are friend or foe, you will be watched while in my lands. Not hindered, simply watched. But you may stay as long as you wish. It has been long since we entertained a wizard in our halls. Enjoy your stay, my Ladies. Legolas, will you see them to a room?” The elvish prince nodded and led them into another hall off to the side of the one they had come in.
"A wizard's apprentices?" Missy hissed at her sister, once again speaking in Japanese. "Are you nuts?"
"Look," Teri muttered back "Professor Thorban, my math teacher, is now Thorban the-"
"Plaid?"
"Green, baka yarou"
"Damn. It'd be fun to have a plaid wizard running around."
"You're warped, you know that?"
"Yup. So are you."
"Screw off"
Legolas looked back over his shoulder at them. "Would that be your native language, my Ladies?"
"In a way," Missy replied "It is one of the languages in our land, though we speak English most of the time"
"English?" asked the confused elf "That is another I have never heard of."
"It is very similar to Westron" Teri said quickly, glaring at her sister. The elf nodded and opened a door in the hall.
"This is where you will stay, Lady Teri." He said. The room was spacious, decorated in greens. A large bed was in one corner, a wardrobe in the other. A lamp hung from the ceiling and a woven green rug was spread over the stone floor. Legolas then led Missy to a similar room next door. He said he would come get them for dinner before he left.
Missy immediately ran down the hall into her sister's room. The other woman was no where in immediate sight. Missy looked around before spotting Teri spread-eagle on the large bed, half sunk into the soft covers. "What the hell are you doing?" Missy asked, speaking in English now.
"Room" Teri said blissfully "I have room to spread out. No worrying about falling off in the night, no rock hard pillow, no-"
"No teddy bear." Missy interrupted. "You forgot him back in the dorm."
Teri frowned, then grinned slyly. "Maybe I can find Glorfindell and have him be my teddy bear? Or Gimli? I heard dwarves were cuddly."
Missy sat on the edge of the bed, grabbed a plush pillow and whapped her sister with it. "I have a better question. Does the laptop still work? Or are we stuck here forever? I would like it, but I would miss Chinese food too much. Funny mental image alert: Elves with chopsticks and a wok."
Teri grabbed her laptop from the table she had sat it on and flipped it open. "It still works." She sighed. "We're not stuck. But I am staying here for a while. I've wanted to do this for years and I'm not giving up the chance now. Middle Earth. Whoda thunk?"
"Dunno, but we can stay for two days." Missy said, holding up a hand at Teri's protests "One, I've got classes on Monday. Two, two days is what Keeren and the others will give us before they organize a search party."
"Fine" Teri sighed "Two days it is. But I am going to enjoy it to the fullest."
"Here's a thought." Missy said standing and walking to the door. "Can we go to other worlds. Like DBZ, or FY?" She shut the door behind her, leaving Teri to ponder the thoughts now in her head.
Fandom: Issues
Characters/pairings: Ensemble
Rating: PG-13
Summary: A group of college students find a way to travel to other worlds.
Warnings: Mary-Sue self insert with bad characterizations.
Notes: Old writing, from waaaaay back in the day, in it's mostly original format (very minor corrections may have been made)
o o o
The first sensation Teri felt was an overwhelming dizziness. The next was that she was lying on an uneven surface with something poking her back. Her laptop was still clutched in her arms. She realized that she could hear birds. Strange.
She opened her eyes. Several dim figures holding bows were standing around her, arrows aimed at the head. Behind them were trees so thick, only a little sunlight filtered through them. As her eyes got used to the gloom,
(Mirk,)
she saw that she was lying on the forest floor, surrounded by a ring of eight men
(They're elves)
who had their bows trained at her head. She heard a groan from behind her and four of the men
(They're elves, not men.)
(Impossible.)
(Admit it, you're in Middle-Earth, about to get shot by an elf.)
(Stop it.)
aimed their bows behind her, where it sounded like Missy was waking up. Teri shook her head to get rid of her mental argument and slowly stood up. Four of the arrows followed her. She looked at the bow-men
(Bow-ELVES)
(Fuck off)
then turned around and helped her sister up. As she pulled the younger woman to her feet she whispered "Let me talk, I'll handle this" in her ear. Missy nodded. They turned back to the bow-men
(Bow-Elves, they're elves)
(Knock it off with the elves, they don't exist)
who hadn't dropped their weapons an inch. Teri studied them one by one, trying to not let her fear show on her face. Then, surprising everyone, (but most of all herself), she bowed low and said "Many days and pleasant night, my Lords." Missy followed her bow after a moment but wisely kept her mouth shut.
The elves looked a little taken aback at the manners the two strange women showed. They looked at each other then one of their number stepped forward, lowered his bow and bowed in return. "My Ladies," he said, his voice fair and musical "We wish the same to you. But, pray, tell us, who are you and of what race. For you do not resemble any Elf, Man, Dwarf or Hobbit I have ever seen."
"My Lords," Teri said standing "I am Teri, daughter of Eugene the Second. This is my sister Missy. We are of the race of men, though I believe we are very far from home right now. Am I correct in thinking that this is Mirkwood of Middle-Earth, now known as Greenwood?" The elves (who's Teri's self-conscious had convinced her were real by now) nodded. "Alas," she continued "I feared, yet hoped it was so. For I have long desired to see this country, yet was always too far away to travel here. Please tell me, does King Thranduil still reign?"
The elf who had spoke first nodded. "Yes, my Father's reign still continues."
"Father's." Teri said with a slight frown on her face "And which son of Thranduil might you be?"
"I am Legolas Greenleaf, at your service my Lady." He replied. The sisters kept their jaws from dropping. Legolas. The elf of whom so many fanfics had been written, their own among them. They both had seen many pictures of what the elf may or may not have looked like, and of course there was the movie version with Orlando Bloom, but none of them had come even close to what the elf truly looked like, if this was in fact real. But they all had been right about two things. He was blond and he was HOT.
Teri bowed again. "It is an honor to meet you, Lord Legolas." She said, noting that Missy bowed again as well. Just keep your mouth shut. Teri thought as hard as she could at her sister.
Legolas looked slightly amused. "An honor? My Lady, what have I done to deserve such honor?" Teri fished around for a moment for the right way to answer but was instead saved by another elf.
"Come Legolas," laughed a dark haired elf "Tales of the war and your part in the Fellowship must have reached the home of these Ladies. Do not pretend you have no idea what they are talking of. You shall go down in legend. Now, why do you not invite them to meet your father and we shall see what goes from there."
The two women from Michigan walked through Greenwood with an entourage of singing elves. Teri could only catch a few words of the song and Missy none of them, but neither cared. It was beautiful. Soon after leaving the small clearing where they had been found they had hit the path they were following. The elves sometimes walked on the path, sometimes slipping off into the trees then coming back. Only Legolas stayed with the two girls the whole time, singing.
"Teri, what the hell did you do?" Missy hissed, in Japanese so the elf wouldn't know what she said, "We're in mother fucking Middle-EARTH! What the hell did that thing do? For that matter, is this real?"
"I'm not sure" The older woman replied in the same language, for once glad they had all taken it "As far as I can figure, one of three things happened. The first is that this is the best damn hoax I've ever seen. The second is that there was more than seasoning in my ramen noodles and I'm tripping out of my gourd. The third…..well, the third is that this is real. That we are in Greenwood, walking with Legolas the Elvin prince." At the mention of his name the elf looked up sharply, but not understanding the language went back to his song.
Missy looked down at her sister with disbelief, mixed with a little fear, on her round face. "So, what do you think it is? If this is a trip, then how can we share it? If this is a hoax, it's a damn good one."
"I think it's real" Teri said quietly. "I mean, look, no wait, smell. Listen. No cars, no airplanes, no smell of gas or oil or city. No tire tracks through the woods. These are old trees, planted hundreds of years ago, there's not many forest's left in the world like this and they're all very far from home. But look, look at them."
Both women looked at the elves around them. They were singing, sometimes doing a small dance along the path, laughing, climbing trees. The women noticed that while leaves covered the path, the only real footsteps they could hear were theirs. The elves didn't crunch the leaves but instead ran on top of the layer, light as the wind itself. Also, the elves had a look, a feeling, about them, a sort of, of etherealness. They felt like the stuff of dreams made real.
"I think" Teri said quietly "That that is a bit hard to fake. And this is too clean to be a trip. Somehow, I- I believe this is real. Don't ask me how, I just do." Though she couldn't explain it to her sister, the thing that cinched it for her was her thirst and slight exhaustion. Somehow she didn't think that she would feel like that in a trip or a dream. And this was too real to be a hoax. No, it was real.
"Okaaaaaay.." Missy said slowly. "But I have another question. How did you learn to speak like that?"
Teri grinned "I've been reading and studying Tolkien for years, remember. I learned on how to speak Westron. Apparently it has come in handy"
The whole party fell silent as they entered a clearing. A bridged stream cut it in half. Across the bridge was a stone wall that looked like a hill that had been cut away. In the center was a large wooden double door. At either side sat an elf with a bow. They sprang to their feet as the party crossed the bridge. The elf to the right of the door, a slim female with white-blond hair stepped forward. Both guards bowed low.
"Fair days, Prince Legolas." Said the blond "May I ask who your visitors are?"
Legolas returned the bow. "Fair days, Èllièn. My guests are Teri and Missy, daughters of Eugene the Second. I am taking them to meet my father." Èllièn bowed again and Legolas and his two guests passed through the door.
The two women looked around with awe at the Elvin-King’s halls. A smooth round hall led slightly downward, decorated with tapestries on either side. After a ways it opened into a large, beautiful hall. A large dais sat at the side opposite the hallway. On the dais was a large chair. In the chair sat a fair faced elf with long white-blond hair. His face was both happy and sad, both grave and cheerful. He looked at the strange women with interest as the group entered and bowed to the floor.
"Father," Legolas said, standing "While in the forest, we saw a bright light. When we ran to it, we discovered these two women on the forest floor and a blue light fading from them. They are Teri and Missy, daughters of Eugene the Second. We have not asked them where they are from."
"I see." Said king Thranduil "Well, my Ladies, can you explain how you appeared in the middle of the Greenwood?
“ My lords," Teri said, standing, thinking real, real fast. "We are apprentices to a wizard, back in our home land of America. We were testing a spell I had created when the next thing I knew was waking up in the forest." She shrugged, put a sheepish expression on her face, and silently thanked Lorin for the acting lessons "While this is not the result I hoped to achieve, I am not disappointed in coming here." Flattery never hurt anyone.
"A strange tale" Thranduil said "I have never heard of Amerika in all of my years, but there are many unexplored lands over the seas I know nothing about. You will have to forgive us for being suspicious, but appearing out of nowhere is quite strange, and until we know if you are friend or foe, you will be watched while in my lands. Not hindered, simply watched. But you may stay as long as you wish. It has been long since we entertained a wizard in our halls. Enjoy your stay, my Ladies. Legolas, will you see them to a room?” The elvish prince nodded and led them into another hall off to the side of the one they had come in.
"A wizard's apprentices?" Missy hissed at her sister, once again speaking in Japanese. "Are you nuts?"
"Look," Teri muttered back "Professor Thorban, my math teacher, is now Thorban the-"
"Plaid?"
"Green, baka yarou"
"Damn. It'd be fun to have a plaid wizard running around."
"You're warped, you know that?"
"Yup. So are you."
"Screw off"
Legolas looked back over his shoulder at them. "Would that be your native language, my Ladies?"
"In a way," Missy replied "It is one of the languages in our land, though we speak English most of the time"
"English?" asked the confused elf "That is another I have never heard of."
"It is very similar to Westron" Teri said quickly, glaring at her sister. The elf nodded and opened a door in the hall.
"This is where you will stay, Lady Teri." He said. The room was spacious, decorated in greens. A large bed was in one corner, a wardrobe in the other. A lamp hung from the ceiling and a woven green rug was spread over the stone floor. Legolas then led Missy to a similar room next door. He said he would come get them for dinner before he left.
Missy immediately ran down the hall into her sister's room. The other woman was no where in immediate sight. Missy looked around before spotting Teri spread-eagle on the large bed, half sunk into the soft covers. "What the hell are you doing?" Missy asked, speaking in English now.
"Room" Teri said blissfully "I have room to spread out. No worrying about falling off in the night, no rock hard pillow, no-"
"No teddy bear." Missy interrupted. "You forgot him back in the dorm."
Teri frowned, then grinned slyly. "Maybe I can find Glorfindell and have him be my teddy bear? Or Gimli? I heard dwarves were cuddly."
Missy sat on the edge of the bed, grabbed a plush pillow and whapped her sister with it. "I have a better question. Does the laptop still work? Or are we stuck here forever? I would like it, but I would miss Chinese food too much. Funny mental image alert: Elves with chopsticks and a wok."
Teri grabbed her laptop from the table she had sat it on and flipped it open. "It still works." She sighed. "We're not stuck. But I am staying here for a while. I've wanted to do this for years and I'm not giving up the chance now. Middle Earth. Whoda thunk?"
"Dunno, but we can stay for two days." Missy said, holding up a hand at Teri's protests "One, I've got classes on Monday. Two, two days is what Keeren and the others will give us before they organize a search party."
"Fine" Teri sighed "Two days it is. But I am going to enjoy it to the fullest."
"Here's a thought." Missy said standing and walking to the door. "Can we go to other worlds. Like DBZ, or FY?" She shut the door behind her, leaving Teri to ponder the thoughts now in her head.