New Chapter
Title: "Like A Movie" from Stories from the Inside
Summary: Andromeda reflects on Sirius
Rating: PG
Pairing: N/A
Warnings: N/A
A/N: I don't like this chapter as much as some of the earlier ones. Perhaps I'll rewrite it. Yes. I think.
I’ve made my peace with it now. I loved him, I really did. He was closer than a brother to me. He was all I had inside of that cold world. There’s nothing left there for me now.
I miss his smile, mostly. It was the most infectious thing I’ve ever seen. He could flash that smile, and everything else would just fade. Everything was fine if Sirius was around.
I never believed it. I know everybody says that. Everyone’s a genius after the fact. I really knew it though. He wasn’t like them. Rius hated the darkness. I wanted to go to the trial. I wanted to stand up and scream at them and break things and save him. But what do you say? How do you tell people who’ve lost their friends, their children, their parents that they’re wrong? How do you stop people who are out for vengeance?
I’ll admit it now; I was afraid when he escaped, afraid for my life. Does an innocent man run? I thought I had been wrong for all those years. I thought he was going to come after me. After all, he betrayed his best friends to their death. He left his own godson an orphan. A year I lived in complete fear of him, of my Rius, of my own cousin.
Then Nymphadora came to me one day. She’d finally finished her Auror training, bless her. She told me all about the Order, rather against her instructions, and she told me she had seen him. I couldn’t believe it, or, rather, I didn’t want it to be true. She said I had one day to visit my Aunt’s old house before the new wards went up.
I went. No more thought, no more hesitation. Perhaps it was a bit self destructive of me, running to meet a convicted murderer. But I didn’t care anymore. I had to know.
My fear caught me on the stairs to the room where he was waiting, just after that wretched portrait stopped screaming at me. Trembling, I felt my fingers reach out and open the door.
I’d like to say it was all like a muggle movie. I’d love to say that I saw his face, and I believed, and we ran to one another, and it was beautiful. Really, I would. But it didn’t happen like that. There were a lot of tears and a lot of screaming before I settled down. I found myself finally sitting on the bed, wrapped in his strong arms. Sirius and I stayed like that for a long, long time, talking until far past the sunrise.
And then, too fast, he was gone. Killed because Bella still couldn’t bear to see him happy without her influence, killed because he cared enough about his godson to try and save him.
Somehow, it wasn’t like losing him the first time. Sirius would have been approved of the way he died. I think it would have almost excited him. He would have been furious about what came after though. I don’t know how many times I’ve had to hear him lauded by people who would have cursed him before. It makes me want to tear my hair out. Rius wasn’t a hero. They didn’t even know him; they just know it’s popular to like him now. It’s so against everything he was. It makes me sick.
Summary: Andromeda reflects on Sirius
Rating: PG
Pairing: N/A
Warnings: N/A
A/N: I don't like this chapter as much as some of the earlier ones. Perhaps I'll rewrite it. Yes. I think.
I’ve made my peace with it now. I loved him, I really did. He was closer than a brother to me. He was all I had inside of that cold world. There’s nothing left there for me now.
I miss his smile, mostly. It was the most infectious thing I’ve ever seen. He could flash that smile, and everything else would just fade. Everything was fine if Sirius was around.
I never believed it. I know everybody says that. Everyone’s a genius after the fact. I really knew it though. He wasn’t like them. Rius hated the darkness. I wanted to go to the trial. I wanted to stand up and scream at them and break things and save him. But what do you say? How do you tell people who’ve lost their friends, their children, their parents that they’re wrong? How do you stop people who are out for vengeance?
I’ll admit it now; I was afraid when he escaped, afraid for my life. Does an innocent man run? I thought I had been wrong for all those years. I thought he was going to come after me. After all, he betrayed his best friends to their death. He left his own godson an orphan. A year I lived in complete fear of him, of my Rius, of my own cousin.
Then Nymphadora came to me one day. She’d finally finished her Auror training, bless her. She told me all about the Order, rather against her instructions, and she told me she had seen him. I couldn’t believe it, or, rather, I didn’t want it to be true. She said I had one day to visit my Aunt’s old house before the new wards went up.
I went. No more thought, no more hesitation. Perhaps it was a bit self destructive of me, running to meet a convicted murderer. But I didn’t care anymore. I had to know.
My fear caught me on the stairs to the room where he was waiting, just after that wretched portrait stopped screaming at me. Trembling, I felt my fingers reach out and open the door.
I’d like to say it was all like a muggle movie. I’d love to say that I saw his face, and I believed, and we ran to one another, and it was beautiful. Really, I would. But it didn’t happen like that. There were a lot of tears and a lot of screaming before I settled down. I found myself finally sitting on the bed, wrapped in his strong arms. Sirius and I stayed like that for a long, long time, talking until far past the sunrise.
And then, too fast, he was gone. Killed because Bella still couldn’t bear to see him happy without her influence, killed because he cared enough about his godson to try and save him.
Somehow, it wasn’t like losing him the first time. Sirius would have been approved of the way he died. I think it would have almost excited him. He would have been furious about what came after though. I don’t know how many times I’ve had to hear him lauded by people who would have cursed him before. It makes me want to tear my hair out. Rius wasn’t a hero. They didn’t even know him; they just know it’s popular to like him now. It’s so against everything he was. It makes me sick.