Title: Take Care of My Boyfriend (Say No)
Fandom(s): U-KISS
Pairing(s): Kemaru, onesided!Alvin
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst
Word Count: 1,669 words
Warnings: Awful!English
Author's Notes: Christmas EVE (I know I’m late T__T) dedication to everyone out there, requested by
thyfloatinglily! It’s not the happiest, but for Kemaru fangirls, it doesn’t have a horrible ending…so uh, enjoy? I promise the PROPER Christmas gift is better :) It’s light-hearted (I thinkkkkk), really.
“What did you call me out for?” Kibum asked with a faint smile, stirring his lemonade with the straw, watching the ice cubes move with too much interest.
“I-I…” Alexander stuttered, sighing because he didn’t dare speak up. “It’s about…Kevin.”
Kibum’s hand came to a sudden stop, straw no longer moving in the constant circular motion. He smiled, though smile not reaching his eyes, looking up at Alexander. “What about him?”
Alexander wouldn’t know how much effort it took Kibum to keep his voice calm, words coherent. Kibum dropped his head back to his very interesting drink.
“I…I want to date him. Since you both are no longer together, I’ll…I’ll take care of him in your place. He deserves the care, no? Kevin’s…precious.” Alexander started, slightly afraid of Kibum.
And I let him go.
“Please let me date him.” Alexander bowed, head facing his thighs, voice sincere. “I’m sorry, but even when the both of you are together, I already had feelings for him.”
-
Today my friend asked me if he could date you
Since I had broken up with you, he said he’d cherish you in my place
-
“Xander-hyung, you called-” A way too familiar voice cut short, and Kibum felt those eyes staring intensely at his head.
“Kevin…sit down.” Alexander said, pulling out a chair for him. “I wanted to talk things out.”
“About…what?” Kevin asked, and Kibum finally felt those pair of eyes leaving him. Kevin slowly sat down, pulling in the chair as he did.
Kibum wondered how long has it been since he last heard Kevin’s voice. How long had they broken up? Four years?
Maybe it felt like four years.
He acted as if a message arrived, and he looked down at his handphone to check the last message from the younger boy.
Four days ago. He finally understood what it meant for a day to feel like a year.
Locking his phone, he managed to catch a glimpse of his reflection. Unshaved moustache, how untidy looking. He definitely looked four years older.
“I asked Kibum if…if I could date you.” Alexander confessed. “I love you, Kevin.”
-
THAT THAT THAT THAT THAT’S OKAY
GET GET GET GET AWAY
“It’s okay, it’s not like we have anything to do with each other anymore
Stop saying sorry, my heart doesn’t hurt
Please be a good boyfriend to her in place of me”
-
Before Kevin could say a word, Kibum cut in. He didn’t dare hear Kevin’s words, in case they cut his heart further. “That’s okay. It’s not like we have anything to do with each other anymore.”
“But you guys have just broken up not long. I’m really sorry for rubbing it in…I know you guys didn’t break up because of any misunderstanding…it’s just that…Kibum you have an arranged partner already…I’m really sorry…I...” Alexander went on and on, feeling really apologetic. Kevin placed his hand on one of Alexander’s shoulder, signalling to him that he should stop.
“Stop saying sorry…” Kevin quietly said, not making his decision clear.
“Exactly, you’re not rubbing in. Please be a good boyfriend to him in place of me.” Kibum forced a smile, slightly looking up at Alexander, managing to see Kevin even for a split second.
He still looks as stunning as before. As if…as if unaffected by the break up.
“Kibum-Kibum-hyung.” Kevin caught himself before using his usual nickname for Kibum, getting Kibum to finally look at him in the eye. “How are you?”
“I’m-”
-
I can’t get myself to say that I still can’t sleep at night because of her
With a forced smile I encouraged him and sent him away OH GIRL
-
Kibum paused for a second, memories of how he just sat up in bed to stare into the space flooding in. Memories of their tearful break up filled his mind, memories of their smiles at any random thing just because they had each other by their side, memories of having someone to hug in the darkest room and someone warm right by his side in the coldest night.
“Fine.” Kibum thought through his answer, and added a “Thank you.” as an afterthought.
“That’s good. How about your marriage?” Kevin asked with his same blank expression.
Kibum didn’t want to expose Kevin, but after years of being with him, he was sure the younger male was just forcing his nonchalance. At the mention of marriage, Kibum stiffened visibly, grip around his glass of lemonade so tight that it might break.
He hated lemonade.
But Kevin loved it.
“It’s…” Kibum wondered if he should speak the truth. “I...made them stop. Or at least postponed it for the time being.”
“Oh.” Kevin nodded, turning to Alexander. “So, why did you call me out again?”
“Kevin…I just confessed to you…” Alexander blinked, confusion clear on his face.
Kevin’s usually distracted. You’ll have to get his full attention if you want anything to get in his head. Kibum bit his tongue, not wanting to step in and look like a know-it-all ex-boyfriend.
“Will you be my boyfriend?”
-
Oh can’t you see? I’m still lovin’ you
My heart still can’t seem to let you go
Say no! no! no! no! no! Say no! no! no! no! no!
Tell him no, tell him your heart is still waiting for me SAY NO!
-
Say no. Say no.
“Xander-hyung…”
Say no. Kevin, my love for you was the reason why I kicked up a fuss and made them postpone the wedding.
“I…”
Even if it’s for a while, say no!
“NO!” Kibum shouted suddenly, causing Alexander and Kevin to jerk their heads to face him.
“Sorry, I-I…I forgot I had something to do.” Kibum pushed his chair backwards as he stood up, slightly bowing towards the both of them.
“I’ll leave first…then.”
-
“She can’t drink a lot and she doesn’t like smoke.
She hates being alone so always be with her.
Always celebrate her birthday and anniversaries.”
I don’t know why I’m telling him this
-
“But…just so you know.” Kibum bit his lower lip, quickly glancing at Kevin to guess his decision before turning to Alexander. “He can’t drink a lot, he gets drunk horribly easily.”
Kevin’s eyes started to space out, Alexander stared back into Kibum’s eyes.
“You don’t smoke, good, keep it that way. Second-hand smoke is horrible too though, so get out of any situations like that at the first second.”
Kibum smiled a little at Alexander.
“I know you can do this. He can’t stand being alone, so stay by his side always. He remembers birthdays and anniversaries very well, so don’t ever miss a date.”
After his last word, he turned and walked away quickly. He felt those pair of eyes again.
He didn’t want to act like the know-it-all ex-boyfriend. He really didn’t.
But if he was sending Kevin off to someone else, he had to make sure he was in good hands.
As much as it hurts.
-
I know I’m going to turn around and regret this but I still acted cool
I know I’m going to be upset behind my friend’s back and beg him not to
-
As soon as he knew he was out of sight to the both of them, he ran. As far as he could, as fast as he could. Go to a place where no one knows who he is, cry his eyes and heart out, look like a total wreck. Whatever, because there’s nothing else he could feel now.
Except pain, and loss.
How he wished he could turn around and say no. No, I don’t allow you to date Kevin. No, I don’t allow a relationship between the two of you.
No, Kevin’s mine.
Yet, no. He acted as if he was fine, he acted as if the break up hadn’t change him a little bit. The untidiness of his hair, the unshaven moustache are shouting that fact, but it was fine.
Because he always looked tough. He always did. And even after losing the most important person in his life, he wouldn’t let his façade falter before him.
Just in front of Kevin.
Why did Alexander have to do that? Why call Kevin out? He would have gone on his knees and beg Alexander to leave Kevin alone if it was just the both of them. He really would have done so.
Anything to keep the possibility between the both of them alive.
-
Oh can’t you see? I’m still lovin’ you
My heart still can’t seem to let you go
Say no! no! no! no! no! Say no! no! no! no! no!
Tell him no, tell him your heart is still waiting for me SAY NO!
-
He panted breathlessly, running till his legs couldn’t carry him further, running till he couldn’t see where he was heading. He fell on his knees ungraciously, tears uncontrollably falling.
“Don’t…It’s only been four days…don’t just move on…” Kibum sobbed, ignoring the hushed whispers from random strangers around him. “I can’t let you go…not yet, not in my life…Say no, just say no.”
Kibum took in a big gulp of air, coughing violently as he choke on his own tears.
-
(Say) no no no (Say) you can’t
(Say) you will wait for me
(Say) no no no (Say) you can’t
(Say) you will wait for me
-
“Kibummie-hyung…” A pair of arms wrapped themselves around Kibum’s body, and Kibum felt his back having a wet spot almost immediately. “I told him. I told him I can’t.”
“Kev…?” Kibum stared into the space before him, mouth agape.
“I told him I can’t move on. I still love you, I can’t just agree to be his boyfriend.” Kevin cried miserably. “Please, please take back your words. Please cancel that wedding, please take me back!”
“Kevin.” Kibum said, hand pulling Kevin to his front before hugging the younger boy tightly. “Please wait for me. I’ll do everything I can, and if what I do is not enough…”
“We’ll elope.”
-
Okay, crappy ending, crappy everything really. I didn't plan properly and I don't know how else to interpret. I'm horribly sorry :(