Do Scars Fade: a Heisei Kumi Fanfic (6/18)
Author: ryosukekoibito
Pairing: Keito-centric, with some side Ariyama and Chiitaro
Rating: R
Warnings: Violence
Genre: Slice of life
Disclaimer: I do not own anyone.
Summary: Keito is left in a state of depression after the loss of his boyfriend, but with the help of his housemates he begins to regain his appreciation for life, and find happiness again.
A/N: This is another instalation in my Heisei Kumi AU! This fic is a direct sequel to Sequence of Upsets, and is the third one written from Keito's perspective. If you haven't read Sequence of Upsets, or the first fic, My New Family, then you may be confused. This fic starts at the end of February 2014, so about six months afterSequence of Upsets ends. Enjoy!Previous Chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5
Only it wasn't Shoon. This man looked strikingly like him, yet upon closer inspection it became obvious that there too many differences between this man and Shoon. He was taller, his eyes smaller than Shoon's. He parted his hair on the wrong side, and his freckles were in the wrong places. His jawline wasn't right. The longer Keito looked at him, the more the man grew to look less and less like his dead boyfriend. But the aftershocks had left his heart pounding in his chest, his throat Ftight, and he knew that he was staring. The man on their doorstep seemed taken aback by their reactions to his appearance, and he took a sweeping glance of all of their faces, Keito feeling as if a bucket of ice were dropped into his stomach as their eyes met for a moment across the space. It was haunting, twisted somehow-seeing Shoon in the man’s gaze, and yet not-and after apparently not finding anything in his glance that gave him any new information, the man said
"Sorry, but I'm looking for Yamashita Shoon. Is he here?" Luckily, Inoo seemed to recover from the shock fastest, saying
"Oh, please come in." It was then that Takaki turned away, rushing over to Hikaru's office door and knocking harshly. After a moment the door was pushed open forcefully, Hikaru obviously angry with the blatant disregard for his request to be left undisturbed, and he was glaring at Takaki as he spoke
"What the fuck do you-" It was then that he caught sight of the strange man just inside the door taking off his shoes, and his eyes widened, all anger gone as he gasped. "Shit."
"He...he's looking for Shoon." Chinen informed their leader, his tone betraying his confusion, and for perhaps the first time since Hikaru had taken over the Kumi-cho position, the younger man was obviously looking to Hikaru to tell them what to do. It took Hikaru a moment to find his voice, and he faltered before stepping forward, introducing himself and bowing. The other man's eyes caught on Hikaru's tattooed arm, obviously just beginning to realize what kind of people they were. But he smiled, bowing in return and introducing himself as Inue Reon.
"Please, have a seat Inue-san." Hikaru said, gesturing to the couch. "If you could get us some tea please, Daiki." Daiki disappeared into the kitchen, and the man took a seat tentatively on one of their couches, Hikaru sitting and turning to face him. The rest of them all sat nearby, in empty space on the couch or on the floor, forming a ring around the coffee table. Keito found himself squished between Yuto and Takaki, Yuto slinging an arm around his shoulders comfortingly as Daiki returned with tea for their guest, and they all turned their attention to him.
"How can I help you, Inue-san?" Hikaru asked, as the man drew the cup away from his lips.
"I was hoping to speak with Yamashita Shoon. I don't suppose he's here?" He let his eyes travel over all of their faces again, a glint of hope in them that one of them would announce that they were the man he was searching for. Hikaru seemed completely perplexed, and he said
"What business do you have with Shoon?" The man flushed, obviously embarrassed, and he said
"Well...he doesn't know me, but...I'm his little brother."
"What?!" Yuto yelped, and Hikaru turned a disapproving glance down on Keito's friend, silencing him at once. It was then that Reon launched into his story.
"My birth name was Yamashita Reon. I was adopted as a baby, and while it was a great life, I grew up without ever knowing what happened to my birth family. Two years ago when I turned twenty, I decided to try and find my birth parents. It didn't take long for me to find record of my parents' deaths. I thought that would be the end of my search when I found the papers. But the articles about the incident I found said that they'd left behind two sons. One-the newborn-was me, but there was another, a two year old. I've been looking for him ever since.
"I found the orphanage he was taken to, and I found out that his name was Shoon. I asked if he'd been adopted, and if any of them knew of his whereabouts, but they didn't have much information. They said he'd only been with them for a short time before he had disappeared one night. There had been search efforts, but he'd never been found. They gave me this picture-" He reached into his pocket, pulling out a wallet and handing Hikaru a small photograph. "-but that was all. For the better part of the past two years I've been gathering all of the information I could, trying to find out what happened to my brother." He sighed, raising his teacup up to his lips as Hikaru passed the photograph around. Keito felt a sharp pain in his chest when it got to him. It was obviously Shoon, the child in the photograph had those same wide eyes, and they looked hauntingly sad for such a small child.
"After a couple of dead ends I eventually found a license to practice law under the name I was looking for. From there I managed to trace him to his law firm, and I was led to an apartment on the other side of town, and then after some searching, it brought me here. I don't really know anything about him, but...I was hoping to finally get to meet my brother." Yabu, the one closest to Reon, handed him back the photo of Shoon. Reon thanked him, slipping it back into his wallet, and he asked, his eyes pleading "Do you know where he is?" The silence following that question was deafening, Hikaru pursing his lips, obviously trying to figure out how he was going to explain to Reon that his search had come to a fruitless end.
"Yes." He finally conceded, Reon's face lighting up in excitement and Keito winced, Yuto's grip growing tight on his shoulder. "Inue-san, I don't want to be the bearer of bad news, but...your brother is dead. He died nine months ago, after a six year long battle with brain cancer. I'm so sorry." Reon froze, his eyes wide, and the smile slipped from his lips. After a minute of silence, the younger man asked
"Are you sure it was him? It wasn't a different Yamashita Shoon?" Hikaru nodded, leaning forward and grabbing the photo album from it's place on the coffee table, pulling it open to an old picture of Shoon, taken back when he was still a child.
"Look for yourself. Does that boy look like the one in your photograph?" Reon gasped, leaning in to look at the image properly.
"Wow." He murmured. "I can't believe it." His expression had morphed into one of sadness, and he looked up at them. "You all knew him?" They nodded as a group, and to Keito's surprise Reon began to cry, a tear rolling slowly down his cheek.
"There are lots of pictures of him in here." Inoo told the man, leaning in and turning the page. "This was his photo album. He took lots of pictures."
"He was very important to us." Yamada said, from his place next to Daiki. "If it weren't for him...I would be dead."
"Me too." Hikaru murmured.
"He's the reason we're all here." Yabu conceded. "He raised most of us."
"Really?" Reon looked at them in surprise, his eyes wide and wet, and his expressions and speech patterns were so like his brothers that it was almost painful to watch, Keito finding himself unable to look away, as he caught glimpses of the man he had loved in this stranger.
"Yeah." Yuto told Reon, nodding. "He saved us. All of us." There was a silence, everyone registering that thought, their grief all strong in their faces, and Keito felt his tears coming on as he said
"He loved us. And we loved him. Very much." Reon looked down at the photo album for a few moments, and there was some sniffling and eye wiping in the silence, before he said
"Could you tell me about him? I want to know what kind of person my brother was." Hikaru nodded, and so they did. They told Reon all of their favorite stories about Shoon. They told him about how he'd loved to celebrate holidays, about how he'd made them all learn despite not going to school, about how he'd loved tea. They told him about how he'd taken them all in. They told him the little things. They told him about what made Shoon laugh, and what made him cry. They told him about Shoon's pride, about his love, and about how much joy he'd brought to their lives. It was the first time Keito had ever heard any of his housemates talk about Shoon, and an understanding struck him, his mind reeling with the realization that he really hadn't been alone in his grief.
He had known logically that they had been affected by Shoon's loss. Yet he'd felt somehow that his housemates would not be able to understand how he had been feeling, but the more they talked the more he realized that they did understand. They felt the loss of the older man in a very real, very harsh way. They had loved him too. It felt very comforting to come to understand this, and for the first time in a long time, Keito felt like he wasn't alone. They told stories for hours, the ten of them going through their album with Reon, talking and laughing and crying, and by the end of it all there was this feeling that some healing had been done, amongst all of them.
It grew to be late, and they offered Reon a seat at their table for dinner, but the young man politely refused, thanking them for everything they had shared with him, and for helping him to understand who his brother was. And despite that Keito still missed Shoon, after Reon had gone he found himself somehow able to eat better, to sleep better, and he wanted to thank their surprise guest for helping him.
This emotional growth Keito felt came at a vital time, as within the week he was faced with a date he'd been dreading. It had been looming in the back of his mind, a dread tugging at his organs whenever he let himself realize just how close it was. He didn't know what to do, or how to handle it, but before he really felt he was prepared June twenty-first was upon him. If Shoon had been alive they would have spent the day in celebration-it would have been their anniversary, their second anniversary together.
They would have probably gone out for dinner, something nice. Shoon would have swung by and picked him up, wearing a suit and tie-a more expensive one than the ones he wore for work-and Keito would have too. He would compliment Keito once they were out of the house, and they would have walked to the restaurant, talking and holding hands. Keito would be hyper aware of the small gift box he'd shoved into his jacket pocket-some sort of jewelry, probably-and he'd marvel at Shoon's beauty in the last lights of the setting sun.
Once at the restaurant they'd order some wine, but neither would really drink it. They'd hold hands across the table, and Shoon would embarrass Keito by having a waiter take their picture. After the meal they'd discuss the food as they made their way to Shoon's apartment, where Shoon would pour some tea, and Keito would give him the present. They'd whisper their 'I love you's, and that would be when they'd finally fall into each other, lips hot on skin. Keito would spend the night there, and in the morning he would wake up early and cook breakfast for the two of them. As it was, none of that was plausible.
He tried to eat in the morning, but he had no interest in his food, and in the end he only managed to choke down a few bites. He contemplated going to visit Shoon; the older man's ashes had been buried with Taiyo's. But he wasn't sure he was ready for that trip, remembering how hard it had been to make the previous October on Taiyo's death anniversary. So instead he found himself in the shrine room. It was a tiny room, barely bigger than a closet, and it was rather hidden, the only way in through a door in the laundry room. It held pictures of Taiyo and Shoon, candles and ceremonial items, and Keito prayed properly, not sure what he was there to do.
He found himself reminiscing, remembering all of their big moments together-when they'd first met, their first kiss, their first date, his first visit to Shoon's apartment, their six month anniversary, their one year anniversary, their last kiss, their last 'I love you'-all of it. The grieving and the loss didn't hit him nearly as strongly as it had a mere six months ago, the pain much less physically debilitating. He cried. He hadn't really expected to, but he did. He hid in the shrine room most of the day, and he went to bed early, skipping dinner. He didn't feel up for the task of eating, much less any socialization with his housemates. None of them were aware of the reason for his distress, the importance of the date not one he felt like sharing, but they gave him space, and Keito was glad to be left alone.
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