I Don't Care (6/12)
Author: ryosukekoibito
Pairing: Hikabu, with some side Takachii, and other side pairings to come!
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Romance
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Summary: Hikaru had a great life. He had two great jobs, fun and caring friends, and an amazing boyfriend that he loved more than anything in the world. Life was good, but it would be perfect if Takaki would just stop calling during his make out sessions with Kota.
A/N: So! This fic is part of a project my sister
thanku4urlove and I have been working on. It ties in with two other multi-chaps: I Do, and I Don’t. If you’d like to get some other perspectives on the same series of events, please check her stories out! I Do is from Chinen’s POV, and I Don’t is from Takaki’s. Sorry, this chapter doesn't have much to it...and it's short. I promise the next one is much more interesting.Previous Chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5
Yabu barely lasted four blocks. He was gripping Hikaru's hand tight, his whole body sagging, his legs obviously weak from lack of use the past twelve days. It was all too apparent that his body was simply not up for the level of stress this venture was putting on it, and Hikaru found himself stopping and gesturing to his back.
"Hop on." His boyfriend looked at him reproachfully, silently refusing to budge. Hikaru took his hand, bending his knees to make it easier for the taller man to get on, and he said "C'mon Kota." Yabu sighed, slowly climbing on, his long arms wrapping themselves around Hikaru's neck loosely, palms flat against his shoulders. Hikaru wrapped his arms around his boyfriend's thighs, holding him up, and after getting situated-and once he was sure Kota wouldn't slip or fall off-he started walking again. After a few steps Yabu relaxed, his head leaning into Hikaru's shoulder, and Hikaru could feel his jaw moving against his back as Yabu said
"Poor Inoo-chan had such a hard time tonight." Hikaru smiled at the thought. Inoo had been a flustered, terrified mess.
"Yeah. It's a good thing it all worked out well for him though, isn't it?" Yabu made an indistinct noise of agreement, turning his head and resting his chin on Hikaru's shoulder. Hikaru could feel his eyes, he knew Kota was searching his face, and he heard every intake of breath, felt his boyfriend's chest expand and contract as he breathed. It felt nice.
"He did better than us, at least." Yabu said, and Hikaru broke out in a huge smile at the memory.
"Hey! I had an amazing confession. It wasn't my fault you misinterpreted everything! My plan was flawless!" He defended himself proudly, hitching Yabu up just a little bit higher on his back. Yabu chuckled, his voice warm in Hikaru's ear.
"Your plan was a mess Hikaru. I had no idea-I thought you were rejecting me before I'd even gotten the chance to confess! What made you think that coming up to me and saying-and I quote: 'I'm in love with your father's son'-was a good idea?"
"It was witty!" Hikaru retorted playfully. Yabu scoffed.
"It didn't make any sense. Perhaps if I was an only child or something it could have worked. I thought you were in love with my brother!"
"I'd only met Koichi a handful of times!" Hikaru objected. "Why would I have fallen for him? And besides-" he glanced back at Yabu, raining an eyebrow. "-didn't Koichi have a girlfriend at that point?" Yabu pouted.
"I don't remember about my brother's dating history." He paused, getting back to the topic at hand. "But when you used that backwards phrasing, and didn't specifically say my name I was so upset!" Hikaru nodded, remembering the whole thing. He had been so excited about his confession-he'd sat up every night the week before in preparation, planning it all out. And he could remember the horror sinking in as after he'd said those words Kota had begun to cry, his face all splotchy and red.
"You ran away." Hikaru reminded him. "You took off crying and I had to chase you, and you yelled at me!" It was Yabu's turn to defend himself.
"I was embarrassed and upset! And you were an idiot!"
"I'd thought you would understand. I remember wondering why you were so unhappy. I thought that even if you didn't return my feelings, being told you were loved was a positive thing." He chuckled. "I was so confused."
"I was too. We were both idiots." Yabu was chuckling with him, gripping onto his shirt, and Hikaru felt his boyfriend's lips press to the side of his neck, kissing him there. Hikaru smiled, blushing a bit. There was a few moments of silence, and then Kota murmured "It's a good thing an idiot like me has an idiot like you. We'd be a mess without each other."
"Agreed." Hikaru muttered. "I can barely remember life without you." Yabu fell silent, suddenly growing rather serious.
"It's been...like ten years." Hikaru thought back, surprised by the statement. But he realized Kota was right. They had been kids, barely teenagers when they'd met, and though they hadn't fallen in love right away, Hikaru had always known that Kota was different. At the beginning he hadn't necessarily thought it would be a good different, but that had quickly changed. It had made sense to go to the same high school, and then afterwards when Kota had decided to move for university Hikaru had come with him, starting up his ramen stand and putting a down payment on a little apartment. They had always been together, it seemed.
A silence stretched between them, Hikaru musing over their years together. But then out of the emptiness, Yabu said rather blearily, as if he was in the process of falling asleep
"I want a kid like Yuto." Hikaru stopped walking, shifting his eyes to try and look at his boyfriend, giving him his full attention. Yabu tilted his head back in a carefree manner, continuing earnestly "I mean, in the future. Yuto's a great kid. I'd like to have a child like him someday." Hikaru considered this in silence for a few moments. Yabu hadn't ever really talked much about children. The statement took him aback. Not that Kota was wrong. He too would be happy to have a son as great as Yuto. He felt the need to respond, so he said
"Yes, Yuto is a child parents can be proud of." Hikaru had always loved kids, he'd always pictured himself as a father, but when he'd fallen in love with Kota he'd had to accept that it was a reality that was simply unrealistic to expect. He had never asked Yabu about children, partially because he felt that it was a step that would only come after marriage, but even more so because he hadn't wanted to imply in any way that their relationship was lacking or unfulfilling for him. He loved Kota, and as long as he had him, he figured he could do without having children.
Yet apparently Kota wanted kids too-on some level-and Hikaru's mind was suddenly reeling with all of the many different facets of the concept of the two of them with children. The notion of having kids badgered his thoughts as they made their way to the train station, and he silently thought about it as they rode the train all the way back home, Kota falling asleep on his shoulder, blissfully unaware of Hikaru's over active mind. Once they had gotten off at their stop and had began the last bit of their walk home however, Yabu seemed to take notice of Hikaru's silence, his brows furrowing in concern, and he said
"Hika, what's wrong?" Hikaru blinked in surprise at the wording.
"Nothing's wrong Kota, everything's fine."
"Something's on your mind. You look like you're over thinking something." Hikaru looked over at his boyfriend, their forms bathed in a yellow glow from the closest streetlight, and he tried to come up with a way to express to Yabu just how much he cared for him. Just how much he wanted what was best for him, regardless of anything else. He expressed it the only way he knew how.
"I just love you. That's all." Yabu smiled contentedly at him, and he said quietly
"I love you too." Hikaru nodded, assured and content, and they continued on their way home. And though nothing had been solved or discussed he knew that it would all work out. Because when the time came for them to discuss having children, they would be able to do it together, and regardless of what the final decision was it would be okay, because they had each other.
"Our anniversary is coming up you know." He reminded his boyfriend. Kota smiled.
"Coming up? It's still a few months away."
"Well maybe we should start planning for it. We could do something special."
"I guess-" Yabu yawned loudly in his ear, taking his hand and swinging them gently between their bodies as they walked. "-we could. But why? What's so special about this one?" Hikaru shrugged, and Kota chuckled affectionately, obviously assuming that he was just speaking train of thought, without any true purpose or decided meaning behind his words. It was at that point that their apartment building came into view, and Yabu pointed with his free hand, announcing
"There it is!" He sounded so happy to see the place, its wholly uninteresting and plain form bringing a smile to his lips, and he tacked on "Home." They walked for the most part in silence the rest of the way there. Hikaru had a bit of difficulty unlocking their front door, the keys jangling loud in the night, hard to make out in the moonlight. But eventually it was pushed open and they tumbled inside, Yabu breathing a sigh of relief as he stepped over the threshold. They took off their shoes at the doorway, leaning on each other for balance, and then they made a beeline for the bedroom, Kota crashing into the mattress face first. Hikaru shook him gently, coaxing
"C'mon, get up. You have to at least get out of those clothes before bed." Yabu grunted in response, unmoving. "I'll help you." Hikaru offered, and slowly Yabu raised himself to a sitting position, lifting his arms and allowing Hikaru to peel his shirt off of him.
"C'mere." Yabu muttered, and Hikaru leaned in, hands on his knees, and his boyfriend wrapped his lanky arms around his neck, pulling him down for a kiss. They kissed for a little while, lazy kisses that left Hikaru feeling warm and fuzzy inside. Yabu hummed appreciatively as Hikaru began fiddling with his jeans zipper, kicking off his pants swiftly. He wasn't so pleased however, when Hikaru pulled away and dug through his dresser, tossing him a pair of pajama pants.
"Not tonight; you're already exhausted. Besides, I have to get things set up for the ramen stand. I need to start another pot of broth tonight." Hikaru explained. Kota looked genuinely upset, and Hikaru immediately felt apologetic.
"But we haven't in two whole weeks." Yabu complained.
"You were sick." He reminded the older man.
"But still..." Yabu protested, and Hikaru nodded.
"I know. I'm sorry. But I know I won't get up after, and I need to do my job. I've been skipping a lot these past weeks, and we need to pay our bills." He pressed a kiss to Yabu's forehead, and then trailed them down his jaw line to his lips. "In the morning?" He murmured, and Kota nodded, saying jokingly
"Curse you and your logic and planning." Hikaru couldn't help but grin at that, and together they brushed their teeth, Hikaru tucking his boyfriend into bed. Yabu was asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow, exhausted from their exciting day. Hikaru then wandered into the kitchen, where instead of starting a new pot of broth as he had told Kota he'd needed to do, he got out the binder he used to write his songs in, and he pulled out a fresh page. Their anniversary was coming up, and he wanted to make it their most memorable one yet. He pulled out a pencil, labeling the page simply as proposal. Just seeing the word made his heart best faster in his chest, anticipation building, and he stared at the blank page for a minute or two, letting the notion sink in before picking the pencil back up, and beginning to write.
He sat there late into the night, brainstorming ideas and scribbling things out and it was only once he had four extremely messy pages of a wide variety concepts that he set his pencil back down. By that point his eyes were itching with exhaustion, his brain foggy with the need to sleep, and he was sure that when he went back over his notes again he wouldn't be able to understand half of what they said, but he honestly didn't really care. At least not right now. He may he kicking himself in the morning.
He hid the pages at the back of his binder, behind a few half completed ballads, and an attempt at a keyboard solo piece for Inoo, knowing Kota would be too lazy to rifle through those. He slid the binder back onto its place on their bookshelf and trudged into their bedroom, tearing his clothes off and slipping on a fresh pair of underwear before climbing into bed. Kota had curled up with his back to Hikaru, so he just threw an arm over his boyfriend's shoulders, pressing himself up against him from behind and burying his nose in Yabu's neck. The older man didn't move, years of sleeping like this having long since made him impervious to any surprise nighttime cuddling, and before Hikaru knew it, he too had passed out.
Corresponding Chapters:
I Do | I Don't
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