Coping Mechanisms

[rowyn]

I went to Starbucks on Sunday. The weather was iffy for bike riding: small chance of showers before 2PM, than larger chance of rain/thunderstorm after 2PM. So I left the house a little before 11AM and planned to get home by 2PM

Comments

[the_gneech]

Lots of food for thought. Thanks!

No meaningful comment, tho. Sorry! ^.^

-TG

[rowyn]

Hee! Shallow comments are good too. ;)

Using humor to cope

[laurie_robey]

I know what you're getting at. I've been through the same kind of thing, and the most helpful thing for converting these experiences from "OMG that was awful" to "so hilarious" in your own mind is to watch how other people do it. The British are especially good at this. PG Wodehouse's treatment of Roderick Spode in the Jeeves and Wooster books is one that pops to mind. If you're not familiar with the character, he's a British fascist who models his politics on Hitler and other fascists who were coming to prominence at the time. Now, that sounds like he's an awful person, but Wodehouse makes him into a figure of ridicule. (Note: Wodehouse wrote about Spode for the first time in 1938, before Great Britain entered WWII and it became clear just HOW bad Hitler was.)

Another example I can think of is Charlie Chaplin in The Great Dictator. Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie in A Bit of Fry and Laurie. I could go on, if it would help.

RE: Using humor to cope

[rowyn]

A lot of "coping with the awful" humor doesn't really work for me (I just cringe through it instead of laughing.) But I do know people who can pull it off. It's also partly a matter of thinking about viewing it that way in the moment. Of focusing on what might be humorous instead of getting lost in irritation.

[terrycloth]

Yeah, I usually humor that sort of person in the hopes of not pissing them off, because if you've already established that they're crazy you can't count on them acting in a rational manner if you get them angry.

But it's not like I feel like I'm doing the right thing. I mean, yeah -- it's what I did 'against' bullies in Jr. High and it worked about as well as you'd expect. I didn't get physically beaten up or have my stuff stolen, but I was regularly humiliated.

[rowyn]

Yeah. I mostly used the "ignore it" method in school, and it worked less badly than anything else for me. Which is not the same as working well. -_-

[kita0610]

You aren't required to find humor in someone harassing you.

[rowyn]

Heh, no, definitely not, and if I did find it funny it still wouldn't excuse him. Even the coffee shop called the cops on him.

But finding humor in it might make *me* feel better.

[tuftears]

Don't worry, I'd have been in much the same boat feeling awkward, except even more so because I wouldn't have been able to make out a thing he was saying. :)

[rowyn]

True! *pictures you smiling in polite confusion for a few minutes and then giving up and taking your hearing aid out to get your work done* c.c

[tuftears]

I don't have to take 'em out, I can just turn them off. >_>

[rowyn]

Ooh, even stealthier!