Too Many Books: A Whine You Probably Shouldn't Read But I'm Putting Out Anyway As Therapy

[rockinlibrarian]

NOTE: I'm kind of unsure about my personal blog, now that I write on a MUCH LARGER PLATFORM over at GeekMom. I could kind of count on being mostly ignored here on my little corner of the internet, just talking to the few people who knew I was here, so I could just WHINE STUPIDLY to the universe every so often and no one would care. So I apologize.

Comments

[ext_1330007]

Methinks you're over-obsessing over the SHOULDS and the RIGHTS and the CAN'TS and the "nobody needs to hear my voice" (srsly? srsly? SRSLY? Don't writers write because they wanna write, not because they think they're gonna add something grandiose to the world? Hemingway would be disappointed. Also possibly drunk.)

This is incredibly hypocritical of me to say, but you need to CHIIIIIILL. And when you do, the chips will fall where they may. Am I technically wrong?

If you have a friend who can drag you to a meditation class or something that would be stellar. If not, YOUTUBE ASMR! YEY!

PS: IS there a way I can subscribe to your posts?

[rockinlibrarian]

To be honest, I've been having altering-of-medications issues all weekend, and I seriously DID need to chill because I was constantly on the verge of a panic attack. But really I just needed to stop what I was taking and go back to the old way, according to my psychiatrist this morning. :P

Yeah, writers write because they want to write, which is why I've been having this identity crisis for so long. I want other people to give me PERMISSION to write because I can't seem to give that permission to myself.

As for subscriptions, I thought livejournal had a little RSS link on the side, but I can't find it anymore. If you have a Feedly you can add it there, because my Feedly is putting its little Add This button up in the corner, too. Or you could follow JUST ME NOT ALL THOSE OTHER DISTRACTING PEOPLE on Twitter because it goes up automatically there. Too bad Facebook sucks about actually showing when people post stuff. Although they do let you mark people as "IMPORTANT: SEND ME NOTIFICATIONS!" there?

[elouise82]

You know one thing I really appreciate about your voice, about your writing? You are really clear-sighted, and you can see both sides, and the reasonable middle path (as in your "Side Arms" post, among others). This comes out really clearly in your journaling here, but I've also seen it in the fiction you've sent me to read. And you have a real heart for people who are hurting, especially children, which is probably one reason why you are such an excellent children's librarian, because you know that books are one way to heal children (and adults) and give them hope. And maybe your non-fiction writing, and your librarian-ing are the best ways for you to use your unique Amy-voice to contribute to the world right now - but that doesn't mean your voice is unneeded, or even that this will always be how you contribute. Maybe someday in the future you'll find a story that begs you to write it, and it will be a gift you can share with others - maybe it won't have the diversity aspect, but it will have something else that IS helpful, that is

[ext_1330007]

Oh my God, it's raining on my face.
Let me second everything said here... can't even.

[rockinlibrarian]

Thank you. You have said just the right things.

[ext_1576347]

Please let me third everything here! I know how hard it is to give yourself permission to write, and the idea that there are so many books already and why on earth would one's own contributions be needed and what would one write about anyway. But I can tell you that first, diversity of many identity aspects is needed, and I would bet that there are numerous things about you (identity/life experience/life challenge-wise) that do not have as much representation as they should have, and there are probably things you WOULD want to communicate to a younger person growing up with or dealing with some of the challenges that you have faced, that no one else has quite said yet. And that is the other thing, which is that there are many types of diversity, one being the fact that you as a human being have a perspective that is completely unique and utterly yours alone. The way YOU SEE things can be expressed by ONLY YOU, and as has been said, yours is a perspective which it would truly benefit humanity to have out there

[rockinlibrarian]

Thank you also. Being that you actually have degrees in underrepresented-voices-in-literature, it makes it extra nice to hear from you! Also I appreciate your taste in general, but, you know.