Servants or Doormats?

[rj_anderson]

It seems to me that for most people nowadays, servant is a dirty word. We tend to think of it as a synonym for slave, associating it with drudgery, dependence, and bondage. Oh, sure, we may have to work for a living, we may have other people telling us what to do, but still we're employees, or contractors, or caregivers - definitely not servants.

Comments

[faerie_writer]

I think motherhood and wifehood are very close to servanthood as well.

[rj_anderson]

They absolutely are servanthood. You can't raise a child without making sacrifices, and you can't hold a marriage together by insisting on having your own way all the time, either.

[tapinger]

Thanks for writing this! I think I'm a little far towards the "fear" (and habit) side instead of the "intentional" side, myself. I had a thought the other day that there's a difference between living to stay out of trouble and living to please God, which I think is a similar distinction.

Robin Hobb's Assassin series pops to mind as a book where someone serves, although he is not a woman and his motives are mixed.

[rj_anderson]

Well, one of the sidetracks I didn't get into in this essay was how the lines between servanthood and doormattery can blur when we lose sight of the reason we are serving, or keep serving in a position out of mere habit long after our zeal or conviction are gone.

I think one good way to tell if you're being a servant or a doormat is to ask yourself why you're involved in that particular work or ministry. Is it because this is something you're equipped for and believe is important? Then you're a servant, even though at times it may be tough. Or are you doing this thing because somebody guilted or manipulated you into it, and/or because you're afraid people will be angry/think less of you if you quit? In that case, you're a doormat and should probably get out of the way so that someone with real convictions and ability can do it...

[rj_anderson]

And as for series involving servants, I'm currently working my way through Catherine Jinks's PAGAN series; have you read those? He definitely isn't keen on being a servant at first, but he becomes one later on.

[tapinger]

I have not read them, but this is the third or fourth time I've seen them mentioned recently. Do you recommend them? (Should I look on Goodreads?)

Re: doormattery (cute word): in my experience, there are few people who have the ability and willingness to step in. It seems like what you're saying (and the Bible seems to agree) is that lukewarm service is worse than no service at all, but that goes against the world's idea that surely giving something is better than giving nothing at all.

This topic also fits in with a recent sermon: do we love God with a divine, serving love, or with human zeal? The divine love (conviction) needs to support the passion, or it will burn out.

[kerravonsen]

Amen.

[wahlee_98]

And now you know where I got the idea for my thesis. Now I just need to write the dang thing. . .

[taraljc]

Along the lines of fictional servants in Remains of the Day and its ilk... Having read a dozen or two books on domestic service in the UK between WWI and WWII, some of my favourite non-fiction are the memoirs of Margaret Powell (which were the basis of Upstairs Downstairs) and Rose Harrison, Lady Astor's lady's maid. And they show an indepth view of life in service that is not all drugery and frustrations, nor is it acceptance of being treated as less than deserving because of their profession (in most cases, the only profession available to them due to poverty and education and class boundaries). It tends to travel between those two extremes. But even the well-rounded views do tend to say "Wow. Life's better on the other side of the green baize door" for obvious pragmatic reasons as well as the social ones. And in Rose Harrison's case, it helps that she and Lady Astor formed a clsoe relationship during the war that lasted through their lifetime, based on mutual respect