Parking...
I have a pet peeve. Specifically, the pet peeve when someone with a very expensive sports car decides to park in two parking spaces.
Now, I consider myself a rational, well-mannered ferret, who has a love for all of god's shiny creatures under the sun, but hell if I don't want to take an acetylene torch to someone's car when they decide "I'm better than YOU" and "I don't want to get any dings in my super expensive car".
Parking in between the lines is just like coloring. They're not that hard to do if you're above the age of 16, and if you can't by then, then an acetylene torch will fix the problem in both cases.
So, I walked into Best Buy on Monday, and saw this nice Corvette parked near the front, hogging up 2 spaces. Now, I'm okay with HUGE freakin' trucks doing stuff like that, because they're FREAKIN' HUGE, but a sports car just makes the owner look like a pompus dook-hat.
Now, I could have keyed the car, and trust me, I was TOTALLY tempted to do it. And when the police arrested me, I'd say, "But officer, this jerk was ASKING to get keyed! Just look at how they parked!" And then I'd be given a meritorous service ribbon and cookies and sent upon my merry way. But no, that would be far too kind. This car needed to be bisected with a blowtorch, just to help me make sure the car fit in ONE parking space.
So, in summary, be glad I don't have an acetylene torch, or I'd be singlehandedly saving the automotive industry by funding a rash of new car purchases.
--Salen
Now, I consider myself a rational, well-mannered ferret, who has a love for all of god's shiny creatures under the sun, but hell if I don't want to take an acetylene torch to someone's car when they decide "I'm better than YOU" and "I don't want to get any dings in my super expensive car".
Parking in between the lines is just like coloring. They're not that hard to do if you're above the age of 16, and if you can't by then, then an acetylene torch will fix the problem in both cases.
So, I walked into Best Buy on Monday, and saw this nice Corvette parked near the front, hogging up 2 spaces. Now, I'm okay with HUGE freakin' trucks doing stuff like that, because they're FREAKIN' HUGE, but a sports car just makes the owner look like a pompus dook-hat.
Now, I could have keyed the car, and trust me, I was TOTALLY tempted to do it. And when the police arrested me, I'd say, "But officer, this jerk was ASKING to get keyed! Just look at how they parked!" And then I'd be given a meritorous service ribbon and cookies and sent upon my merry way. But no, that would be far too kind. This car needed to be bisected with a blowtorch, just to help me make sure the car fit in ONE parking space.
So, in summary, be glad I don't have an acetylene torch, or I'd be singlehandedly saving the automotive industry by funding a rash of new car purchases.
--Salen