Long way from those American Girl magazines

[retro_andi]

What will make her most proud of me?

The answer may surprise you. Of course good grades and some remarkable talent will bring a smile to your mother's face, but according to a recent study, nearly half of all moms say that what makes them proudest is when their daughters perform good deeds...that and when they're poised and polite. (bold mine)

Comments

[anonymous]

Ms. Castonguay, are you scoffing?! I don't see anything to be scoffed at for young women doing good deeds. I also see the merits of being "poised and polite", but it does sort of rankle the feminist me - especially the poised part. I happen to know that my mother is very proud of my brother's manners, but I don't she'd call him poised. Anyway, I digress.

My point is that I think it's wonderful that mothers are proud of their daughters for doing good deeds. Everyone can be altruistic and empathic, regardless of intellect or ability or "remarkable talent", and in our communities today we SHOULD have pride in these qualities - they are so so so lacking.

That's my piece. Read, respond.

xox, Mol

[retro_andi]

Scoffing? Not at all. I was surprised that having a daughter that was poised and polite was ranked #1 by over half of the women surveyed, and wondered if that would hold true over the gender line. I know that my mom would always comment on other children's behavior--usually with an aside like "Don't ever do what X just did in public"--and I wondered if it was due to the perception that people can (do)judge a parent on their child's behavior and actions. I also can never recall a time where my dad remarked on being proud of his "well-behaved children", which made me then think of how fathers would answer.

And sure, my inner feminist was a little rankled but I also understand how this is such an important piece of pride. ("Poised" still conjures images of well dressed girls sitting with their ankles together. This could be a generational thing, though.)

Thanks for the comment, though. Great to hear from you through the internets.