Comments | remisfriend26: Fast Lane to Pain (Part Three)

remisfriend26

Fast Lane to Pain (Part Three)

Jan 23, 2012 00:43

Characters: John, Mary. Dean (16), Sammy(12)
Plot: Same plot, same people... Just continuing with the aftermath of Dean's little late night escapade... Mary makes her disappointment know to Dean; Both his bottom and his back, and John tries to think of how to get his family past the mess of Dean's poor choices. John also ends up in his own trouble.
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john winchester, belt, au!verse, poppa winchester, dean gets spanked, sam winchester, dean winchester, john gets spanked, mary winchester, hand, teen! chester, rosie (oc)

Comments 7

capricorn86 January 22 2012, 00:59:58 UTC

Mary comes across (to me, anyway) as the harsher of the parents, at least in this part. I totally understand why she is so upset though, but I`m glad John was able to calm her down a little and make her understand there was no way he could take his belt to Dean when the kid was sporting such a sore backside already.
There`s a lot of angst and tension in this part, but that`s not a bad thing. I think it`s realistic and it makes sense. Everyone was really worried about Dean and his safety.
I like how John tries to think of ways to fix things for his family. It definitly sounds like him.

Wow.. the mental image of an adult John getting his ass handed to him by his father.. just wow! XD Thanks for writing that.

remisfriend26 January 22 2012, 01:22:52 UTC

Hahaha, you are welcome! I've always wanted to see how it'd be for Daddy John getting his ass handed to him. :P
Yeah, I struggled with writing this quite a bit. Generally I think Mary'd be less strict, apart from in extreme situations where she feels REALLY strongly... But I dunno, I just always imagine her as being into the whole not sleeping around thing, hence her being upset. I know how i'm going to repair things and soften her up again though, I think... I just hope it's not too tense, cause I like Mary so don't want her to seem too hard on him! I just figure she, as a mother, would probably struggle to get control of her emotions after the scare of thinking she'd lost one of her babies... (Which'll hopefully be shown in the finale.)

I'm definitely going back to simple wee! chester fics after this though, hehe!

remisfriend26 January 22 2012, 01:26:19 UTC

Then again, John's also kinda my favourite so probably always seems more decent. ;) Nah, I think that although John gets angry faster, it's a more controlled, simmering rage where as Mary'd be harder to make angry/upset but that when it happens, she'd properly react.*

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remisfriend26 January 22 2012, 10:31:14 UTC

I know what you mean, she does seem pretty harsh/unfair in this bit... I'm hoping to sort that in the next part when her and Dean makeup and she explains everything to him. I also agree with you, definitely takes two to tango hehe :P but I think i'll try work in Rosie's side of it, perhaps a text or them bumping into each other or meeting up or something and comparing punishments? As only teens'd do ;)
Thanks though! I'm really glad you enjoyed it and REALLY appreciate the feedback!

winchesterlove2 January 22 2012, 04:26:03 UTC

just a quick curious question...in the pre-story/warning section you mentioned that mary makes her anger known to Dean's bottom and back...what happened with the back i'm confused.

and i like the twist of Mary frantically placing a call to John's father. i think he deserved it =P

remisfriend26 January 22 2012, 10:27:18 UTC

...i did? Well, that is a major typo haha! Sorry Abbey, didn't mean to make you worry or anything :P

LOL, so did I ;) or at least, if I didn't, I just wanted to see him get his ass handed to him anyway ;)

brassband777 January 22 2012, 14:21:02 UTC

Ok, you totally surprised me there....I didn't see that one coming - John's own dad turning up. Very clever plot twist!
I was so glad that John didn't listen to Mary - she was obviously so distraught that she wasn't thinking clearly. Even though he wasn't spanked again, I felt so sorry for Dean, because what his Mom said must have really hurt him pschologically :(
Loved John comforting and reassuring Dean until he fell asleep and then doing the same for Sam...that was really sweet.
Admittedly, John going off and not telling Mary wasn't his brightest move, but I could understand him needing to get away and sort his head out after all of the tension.
I liked how John was focussed on healing the problems by planning on spending some quality family time together :)