The Afterlife Bar and Grille - Skin
That’s all right, Mary. Here - have yourself a drink. Most beings are taken by surprise when things come around full circle like that. Don’t take it so hard.
Now, I don’t seem to have a name here. Someone didn’t fill out all their information. Check your tickets, folks. #5278…
Sorry, Olly, but I have a really good reason for not giving you my name. I don’t remember what it is.
So, like, before you get all shocked and think I’m slow or something, let me just tell you a little about myself. First, I grew up in Cali - the valley. I had a bit of a tough time because I was always a bit of a plain kid. It only got worse as I got older and into my ‘awkward’ years. Well, those years really never left me.
In school, I took a lot of drama classes. And I was good - no lie; everybody said so. I thought, awesome, this is, like, my calling. I’m totally gonna be an actor! ‘Cause, ya’ know, I had this real knack for getting into character and stuff.
So anyway, after graduation, I went to all sorts of auditions. It was really tough getting rejected all the time - but I just figured it went with the biz’. Until this one time… I was wearing these pants that didn’t have pockets, so I had set my car keys down when I went in for the read. Then, I like, totally spaced and left them - for real. I was the last one of the day, so I didn’t have to worry about interrupting anyone else and looking like a great big jerk.
I walked in and overheard the casting directors talking. I… I… they said I was ugly! ‘Plain’ hurts, but ‘plain’ I’m used to. I had never been called ‘ugly’ before! And worse, one of them even said hideous.
I grabbed my keys and ran to my car. By the time I got to my teeny, repellent apartment, I was bawling my eyes out. My roommates, whose names I also forget, asked me what was wrong. After telling them the whole heartbreaking story, they took me out to the bar and got me plastered. They were such true friends!
I was so totally drunk that the rest of the night was pretty much a blur. I do remember some hotties at the bar - but all I could think of was that one’s nose is smaller than mine, that one’s eyes are more even and a pretty shade of blue, and that one has lips that I would die for.
When I woke up the next morning, totally hung-over, I looked in the mirror and thought that something weird was going on. I looked different. Better. I looked hot!
Well, that’s how it all started. I realized that I had this totally cool gift! I could, with a little practice, make myself look like anyone! And, my natural acting abilities allowed me to act like anyone, too.
I kept practicing and practicing. It was fun becoming other people! But, it was an addiction. I couldn’t stop. And, the more I did it, the better I got at it. And, before too long, I not only could get into character, I could get into people’s minds.
Like any junkie, I was soon wanting more. I realized one day that there was something I was missing - companionship. I mean, like, I was traveling all over, being different people, but I missed having someone to talk to on a personal level.
I found this guy who traveled a lot for business. One day, I became him. I told his fiancé that my (his) business trip had been cancelled. I spent a whole month with her. It was the best time I ever had!
Then, as I was getting myself ready to go back to my lonely life, this jerk calls his fiancé to tell her that he took an earlier flight because he missed her! Well, you can imagine the problems that caused - I was standing right there while she was on the phone with him!
And, OK, let me just say that I really didn’t mean things to go the way they did. This chick was screaming and asking what was going on - and what was I going to say? The truth wasn’t even a possibility. Then, the crazy you-know-what lunges at me. I don’t even know how it all happened - but she ended up on the wrong end of a butcher’s knife, or steak knife, or one of those big knives that nobody really uses from the wooden block.
And, uh, to say that I was totally freaking out was an understatement. I did the first thing that came to my mind and… well, I buried her in the backyard. Thank God that these people were rich and lived far enough away from their neighbors - of course, the privacy fence didn’t hurt either.
I cleaned up the blood and stuff from the scuffle and hopped in the shower to relax a little bit and wash myself off. Next thing I know, the husband knocks on the bathroom door and asks to come in. He doesn’t even wait for an answer! Luckily, I have become rather quick at changing myself and ended up staying another month with him. It ended badly though - I ended up having to kill him when he smelled his fiancé’s body in the garden.
So, that’s how my life went. I would become some random person just so I could get close to another human being. Sure, here and there, some would reject me, but I learned how to harness that anger. I got really good at killing people and not getting caught.
Then, I became Dean. Oh my God! For those of you who, like, don’t know - Dean is the smokin’ hot middle Winchester. Whew! But, boy, does that guy have some issues! I actually started to feel bad him. I mean, absent father, brother who abandons you - I get it, man. So, I guess my softer side decided I would do the guy a favor.
So, there I was, as Dean - I had the other one tied up and ready for my knife. I really did. Somehow, he got loose and we fought. And, lucky for me, Dean is a great fighter because I would never have been able to get the upper hand on my own.
I was about to finish the kid off when I heard my - I mean, Dean’s - voice from behind me. He was aiming a gun at me! I was stunned. I didn’t know what to think. Here I was doing the guy a favor…
I guess I must’a moved or something, ‘cause Dean shot me! He actually shot me. Right in the chest! God! Last time I try and do a Winchester a favor!