Erosion

[shimotsuki]

Title: Erosion
Author: shimotsuki
Summary: Remus is moving, and James is sulking, because he really isn't fond of change. (Background Lily/James.)
Rating: PG
Warnings: mild profanity
Word Count: 1728
Author's Note: At one point there is a reference to the events of Letting It Matter, from last year's Tales of Whiskey and Regret. (Also, profuse thanks to

Comments

[shoebox_addict]

Oh...poor Remus! This was a good fic though, well done!

[shimotsuki]

Thank you! I'm glad you liked it.

[hrymfaxe]

Oh, oblivious James!! The missing books really should have clued him in a lot sooner. But I like your explanation that his own situation makes him overlook the possibility of Remus' reasons being financial. It must be a difficult aspect of their friendship, as evidenced also by Remus' tight smile when he is caught out. I love how well James knows Remus - how he can read him beyond what Remus says with words. And oh the awkwardness of offering help and declining to receive it... Evil world! for making it so

[shimotsuki]

Oh, thank you so much for the kind and detailed comments! I'm really happy that you liked this...I sort of wish I'd had another day or two to think it over before posting. But I was delighted to find that "fret" quote. I had no idea what "fret" meant as an archery term, and it turned out to be perfect.

I'm glad you saw early on that James was being oblivious, because that was my plan. But I also meant for the bit at the end, where James is saying that Remus can handle anything, to be this same kind of James-oblivion (or denial?), only I don't know if that worked... Definitely wish I'd had another day to edit! :/

[katyhasclogs]

Ahh so this was the Sheffield fic!

I thought this was just great - it shows so many facets of both their personalities. I think you also captured really well that awkwardness about money that exists between friends when one has a lot more than another.

Overall, a beautiful, quiet, sad little piece. I liked it very much.

[shimotsuki]

Yes, this was the one! Not too much of Sheffield in this fic, but I wanted to figure out where Remus was moving to so I could expand on that later if another Marauder-era plotbunny came up.

Thanks for your kind words. Money really can be a sticking point, especially for someone as proud as Remus.

[gilpin25]

You've no idea how I wish I'd thought of James had been born with a silver wand in his fist, which was just the phrase I was looking for at one point in mine and ... never found, lol.

I think that idea, of James always having things very easy, and therefore not quite fully appreciating the other side of the coin/wand for Remus works really well. We're one step ahead of him almost straight away, and he's so infuriatingly slow to catch on - but then there's the difficulty of just how you offer help and get it accepted at one and the same time. I feel as if he cares a lot, but just doesn't see enough. Though the last line makes me hope he may insist if he realises that, far from "Good old Moony!", Remus is acting his socks off and there's something wrong.

The quote for 'Fret' is, indeed, wonderfully apt for so many things. I'd no idea it meant that either in archery terms, but what a fit!

Very much liked this. And I'm off to buy Remus his books back and accidentally smack James with one. ;)

[shimotsuki]

Thank you! This review has just made me inordinately happy, because you've hit on things that I was afraid I hadn't written clearly enough -- especially far from "Good old Moony!", Remus is acting his socks off and there's something wrong. I wanted the ending to reflect the same obliviousness that we're seeing from James throughout the piece, but...the fic probably needed another day's worth of rumination and editing, alas.

I feel as if he cares a lot, but just doesn't see enough.
That's exactly what I was going for! Hooray!

And, if you're going to be smacking James, be sure to give him one for me, too. ;)

[chiara_515]

This is incredibly sweet and sad! I think your characterization of James is great - he is adorably oblivious! As others have already said, I think that the way you have portrayed the awkwardness of their financial differences is very accurate. The reader is squirming long before James is, but we still see that his heart is in the right place, as clueless as he is. Very nice! :)

[shimotsuki]

Thank you! I'm glad you found it sweet as well as sad, heh. It was fun writing oblivious James...