Fic: Strawberry (2/3 of "Whitefall" series)
“Mmmm…”
“More?” River asked.
“Oh, yeah!” Jayne replied eagerly.
“Hi, River! Whatcha doin’?”
“Hello, Kaylee,” River replied, not looking up from her task. “I am rewarding Cobb for a job well-done.”
River deftly fed the merc another mouthful of cherry cheesecake as he was unable to manage the fork himself due to the half-consumed hero sandwich clenched in one fist and the massive donquito-mexi roll clenched in the other.
“Fanks!” Jayne mumbled with a blissful smile as he chewed.
River and Jayne were sitting in a booth in a greasy-spoon diner, the tabletop heavily laden with food. Simon gaped as he took in the incredible amount of dishes scattered around the surface: bowls of saucy noodles, trenchers of real beef stew, plates of fried spudsticks, cheesy-peppers and broccoli, and a huge platter featuring at least six different kinds of dessert.
“Mei mei, to what ‘job’ are you referring?”
River put the fork down on the dessert platter and picked up one of the colossal-sized soft drinks place strategically around the table that Jayne was using to wash everything down.
“He was kind enough to assist me with carrying my purchases, ge ge,” she answered, holding the drink out to Jayne, who leaned forward and took a long, lusty sip and promptly belched, albeit with some attempt at delicacy as he shunted the gas to his left elbow.
“Oooh,” Kaylee said, sliding in next to Jayne, “whatcha buy?”
“Boots,” River replied, watching Jayne’s eyes as they darted around the table. “Pants, socks, tops, jackets, protective covering for my breasts…milkshake, Cobb?”
Jayne nodded vigorously as he took a massive bite from the hero sandwich. River held the tall glass to him, careful to make sure the straw got into his mouth and not one of his nostrils.
“Doesn't this disturb you at all?” Simon asked Kaylee in a stage whisper as he sat down.
“Naw,” Kaylee said, her adorable nose scrunching as she watched River retrieve a spoonful of un-mixed strawberry ice cream and feed Jayne. “I think it’s dulcet, the two o’ them gettin’ along.”
“Cobb would like you to know that you are welcome to partake,” River said, indicating the food.
“Jayne, you’re sharing your victuals?” Kaylee asked, stunned and more than a little tickled at the same time.
Jayne nodded in the affirmative, cheeks bulging with donquito-mexi roll.
“Shiny!” Kaylee said, reaching for a cheesy-pepper and popping it into her mouth before she patted Jayne on the shoulder. “That’s right nice of ya, Jayne.”
Jayne shrugged as he chewed. “Fank ‘er - 's 'er coin.”
“If he runs out, he’ll just order more,” River said with a patient grin as she carefully fed him a piece of triple-chocolate torte. “He’s still got another thirty platinum to go.”
Jayne gestured to the strawberry shortcake with the fist that held the sandwich and did a happy little shoulder shimmy as River skillfully obliged him.
“Hey, Simon,” Kaylee whispered, offering him a fried spudstick, “you know what they say, dontcha?”
“What’s that?” Simon asked with confusion before he accepted the spudstick.
Kaylee grinned as she watched River proceed to pluck a candied cherry from the top of a piece of cheesecake and hold it out to Jayne.
“About the way to a man’s heart,” Kaylee prompted as she nodded towards Jayne, grunting manfully as he devoured the cherry.
“Huh?” Simon murmured, glancing over at River and swallowing hard as Jayne leaned forward to lick cherry syrup off his sister’s wrist.
Kaylee snickered softly as Simon’s eyes went wide. “It’s through his stomach.”
Simon’s gaze returned to Kaylee’s eyes. He put his hand up to protect himself from the disquieting sight of his sister hand-feeding Jayne Cobb.
“And up,” River added offhandedly.
“What’s that, sweetie?” Kaylee asked before she took a sip of cola.
“One must penetrate the abdominal cavity through the layers of dermis, peritoneum and omentum and then proceed perpendicularly into the thoracic cavity to the site of cardiac activity,” River responded, adroitly carving off another piece of strawberry shortcake.
“Huh?” Kaylee looked at River, then at Simon for some kind of explanation.
Simon shook his head. “Mei mei, I know what you said, but I’m not sure that’s what Kaylee m - ”
Jayne snorted as he wolfed down the shortcake.
“I am in agreement, Cobb,” River said, nodding as she presented the milkshake again. “They understand, but they do not comprehend.”
“Care to explain?” Kaylee asked, enjoying the effortless way Serenity’s two loners interacted.
Jayne rolled his eyes as he made a punchin’ motion - horizontal, then vertical - with the hand that held a much-diminished hero sandwich. “’Way to 'eart - froo stummick an’ up! Dong ma?”
Kaylee giggled and Simon paled as they watched River and Jayne share a “partners-in-crime” smirk.
Simon grabbed the strawberry milkshake glass and took a hearty swig before he put his hand up again to shield his eyes. "No, I was wrong before. This must be what going mad feels like."
Fic: Strawberry (2/3 of "Whitefall" series)
Author: Green Owl
Rating: PG-13 (River and Jayne get a bit graphic)
Summary: Jayne is properly rewarded by River for various duties.
Part 2 of a 3-part piece of fan fiction for sunshineali.
Much affection,
Green Owl